Lord Zod

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
In Saturday's game, a couple members of the team are meeting with a high-ranking VIPER member, incognito, during a function being held at the Scarab Club in Milennium City. Sentinel, the team's power armor wearer, stations himself on a nearby rooftop "just in case" something goes wrong or VIPER gets any "funny ideas." It turns out that the VIPER member had the same idea, and there's a VIPER aircav agent also stationed on the rooftop. After a bit of "strange cats sizing each other up" behaviors, Sentinel and the VIPER aircav agent come to the conclusion that (a) they're both there to do the same type of job and ( there's nothing to be gained from starting a fight with the other guy just this moment.
 
Sentinel is also moderately infamous inside VIPER circles because, before he was piloting it, the suit of alien power armor he wears was in the hands of VIPER. He's the main reason it's not in their hands any more, and they really do not like him much.
 
So, after some uncomfortable silence, the VIPER aircav agent tries to strike up a conversation with Sentinel, and is rather unsubtle about making a bid to get him to "come back" to VIPER.
 
VIPER: "I really don't understand why you left VIPER in the first place. You put your life on the line every day, and for what? Public adoration? That and two bucks will get you a cup of coffee. The rewards for being a member of VIPER are much higher than veneration by the masses."
 
Sentinel: "I make $300,000 a year. How much are you pulling down?"
 
VIPER: (more silence) "There are a lot of perks for being part of VIPER, the sorts of things that, as a superhero, you just don't get to do. That's a much bigger incentive than mere money."
 
Sentinel: "One of my teammates is the avatar of the goddess of Sex, Drugs, and Rock & Roll. How do you think that compares to your perks?"
 
VIPER: (long pause) "I think we should keep our minds on the job were supposed to be doing up here." (lapses into silence)
 
 
----
 
(One of Sentinel's teammates, Scarab, is a multiformer and most of her alternate forms are based on one of the gods of the Egyptian pantheon. One of those forms is that of Hathor. )

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
Years ago, we were playing a "space western" -- yup, cowboys in space (and this was long before Firefly was even a gleam in Joss Whedon's eye).
 
In it, there was an alien species that looked like humanoid spiders, who filled a similar niche in the universe as the Chinese immigrants filled in the American west. Some aliens had a little resturant, and we walked in, sat down, and took a look at the menus.
 
Me: Hm... "Flied Lice." God, I hope that's a typo.
 
Bill.

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
This is from a sci-fi space opera campaign I ran, that just came to a close a few weeks ago. The orginal premise was that the PCs would escape from a prison ship in the first session and then become space pirates, but since I wanted to give the PCs a lot of freedom in deciding the course of the game, they turned out to be more like freelance mercenaries than pirates.
 
The campaign lasted about a year, and this happend after about 9 months. The PCs have just finished a particularly long mission and are looking for work. Some of them start talking about maybe getting a letter of mark to do some privateering.
 
Player A: "I couldn't do that. If we're going to turn into a bunch of pirates, my character will strike out on his own and I'll just have to quite the game or make a new character or something. It's against everything he believes in."
Me: Stunned Silence.
Player B: "Um... Player A, the GM originally pitched this to us as a game about being space pirates."
Player A: "Yeah, I know, but I forgot about that when I made my character."
 
Now I look back on that and laugh, but I swear, at the time it was like he smacked me in the head with an axe.

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
From last night's Fantasy Hero Turakian Age campaign:
 
Raz (Human Rogue) and Grangnar (Drakine Wizard) take a load of silver ore found on their last adventure to a local smithy to sell it. As the smith's apprentices are carrying the loads of ore into the store, Grangnar, a little leery of... well.. everyone, after all the cultists that they've run into lately, asks the Smith -
 
Grangnar: "So... you haven't raised a horde of ravaging undead in the basement or anything, have you?"
 
Smith: "... Define 'Horde'."
 
Grangnar: "Umm... Over 5?"
 
Smith: ".. Do you mean 5 and over, or just more than 5?"
 
Grangnar: "Umm... more than 5."
 
Smith: "Oh. In that case, no. No I haven't."
 
Grangnar: "Oh. Good."
----------------
After a brief exchange overnight with Avelyne Lindsey, another prisoner being kept in the tower, where the PCs found themselves imprisoned, Raz speaks to Grangnar:
 
Raz: "I don't know if you noticed this or not, but that woman up there in the cell next to yours is a total psycho."
 
Grangnar: "Well.. she IS a woman."
----------------
And later, as Grangnar attempts conversation with the unusually reclusive Avelyne:
 
Grangnar: "So... what are you in for?"
 
Avelyne: "... I killed my husband."
 
Grangnar: "Oh. You.. didn't raise ravaging hordes of undead or anything afterwards, did you?"
 
Avelyne: "... Define 'Hordes'."

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
Pickup D&D game tonight. I decide to do something I rarely do, a pretty mindlessly direct greataxe-wielding Barbarian. I hold off my one-and-only berserk rage until the end of the night ... and we encounter the main bad guy.
 
I get the best initiative.
I rage.
I charge.
I attack.
I hit critically.
My 3d12 damage comes up 10,11,12.
Counting my Strength and Power Attack at the time, the damage came up to 53.
Fight over.
 
Everybody just kind of stares at the minis and grid map for a moment. There's an uncomfortable silence, and then ...
 
Me: "Looks like the crit hit the fan.":D

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
I was joining one of my GMs other regular games for a few sessions, I don't normally play with the second group, but their game takes place in a shared world so my character can join them.. I'm a shapeshifter with Accidental Change, most of them are powersuit types.
 
We're attacking a wharehouse with magic weilding thugs, after subduing the outside guards we're deciding what to do next when a sniper opens a window and shoots me, doing body triggers the Accidental Change and I burst into an Unkindness of Ravens (3 dozen birds or so).
 
GM: You get shot and take 2 Body.
Me: *rolls Acc.Chng.* I explode into a bunch of ravens.
The Healer: I CAN'T HEAL THAT!!!
 
They didn't know, up to that point, that I could shape shift at all... it was one of those surprise moments you can never repeat.

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
The group goes downstairs and discovers an unspeakable tenticle horror in the room. The horror does not yet discover that the characters are there.
 
PlayerA: I'm looking around for runes or magical barriers (in character) "There must be some reason why this creature can't leave this place."
 
PlayerB (in character): "It's complicated, but I think I figured it out. Creature." (makes a hand motion for 4 to 6 inches) "Doorway." (makes a hand motion for one inch)
 
I was busting out laughing, I tried to continue.
 
Me (bluffing): "Well, the walls are constructed in a way to prevent the creature from escaping."
 
PlayerB: "Again, Creature.... Doorway." (repeating the hand motion)
 
I busted out laughing again. Really, I wasn't thinking in terms of an extra-dimensional horror that could simply teleport away or break down the walls.
 
Me: "The corners are rounded which because it is an extra-dimensional horror prevent it from escaping the confines of the room."

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
*There's a warning plaque on the closed coffin lid. It says: "DANGER: Do not expose contents to sunlight. Do not expose contents to flame. Do not open unless accompanied by an expert. Fragile.*
 
On the coffin lid seems to be a series of pictograms designed to be read by a civilization thousands of years in the future depicting a person opening the coffin and pulling out the stake. The first one shows a happy spaceman from the future opening the lid. You know he's happy because he's got a smiley face. The second shows him pulling the stake. The third shows the stick-figure in the coffin sitting up. He's got a frowny face with fangs. The fourth shows the stick-vampire eating the spaceman. Now the spaceman is frowning, and the stick-vampire is smiling. The fifth shows the stick-vampire frowning, hunched over the dead body of the spaceman.

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
From Fantasy Hero
 
"Lets just level a small village, and then we'll play it by ear."
 
Get-rich-quick scheme #1
"Okay, so we'll teleport to another part of the world, kill a crocodile, cut off it's head, come back, present it to the king, tell him it's a dragon, and collect the reward money."
 
Get-rich-quick scheme #2
"As long as we're assassinating a public official, lets do it openly. That way we can get a price put on our heads, and as people come to collect it, we can keep killing them and taking their stuff. If we get tired of that, we can transform the corpses to look like us, and turn ourselves in"
 
The rest of the party didn't like these plans.
 
From Star Hero
 
"The doctor said I have a special power called 'brain damage' that keeps psychics from hurting me."
 
These last two were mostly funny because the character is 100 year old dragon
"I've been rollin' with my homies"
"Hey chica, you want to go steppin'?"