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Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

Darren Watts

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*L* Okay, sounds like a fun group.


I don't have a group 'quote of the week' since I don't often get to game them as much as I'd like, but a few quips will always stay with me.


"My rock like brick is buying his comeliness up."

"Okay, what's your rationale?"

"Remember those head shots he took?"


"I figure they chiseled his features."


"This villain is always two steps ahead of us."

"Great, we go backwards and maybe he'll get lost!"

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In last weeks DND game...


The party barbarian, after being offered team leadership...


"I will not be leader."


pause pause pause


then she continued


"So, this is what we will do..."


and she proceeded to tell them all what to do.


As the others listened intently, i about fell out of my chair.

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Guest Champsguy

"Kid Fist demands blood!"


"I know Tae Kwon Do, and thus, am INVINCIBLE!"


"Hey Pat (the GM), how far away is that speedster?"

"Oh, he's halfway across town. You can see him with your telescopic vision."

(Firing up heat vision) "Heh heh. Make a Perception roll."


"Hey Pat, how far away am I from Thor?"

"Well, he's on the ground, and you're pretty far up in the air, behind the clouds."

"Can I see him?"


"Can he see me?"

"Not at the moment."

"Heh heh. Make a Perception roll."


"Okay. That got his attention. He's riding his chariot up into the sky to meet you. He's looking around for you. Your heat vision just seemed to make him mad."

"So... his chariot is pulled by those flying goats?"


"He can't fly by throwing his hammer?"

"Not this Thor."

"Heh heh. Have his goat make a Perception roll."


(After travelling to Nazi world, the brick Gridiron sees a nazi beating an old woman)

"Hey, nazis hate cripples, don't they?"

(tears nazi's arm off)

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GM: Crenshaw (Nasty villain, a Vampire Silver Avenger...don't ask me how, just play along) is standing infront of the elevator. Its doors' open revealing the corpses of the stationed guards. He is looking intently at you.


Vanguard(Me): Golden Avenger! Thank God you're here!


Crenshaw (Turning to look back): What!?! Now you sho up you-


Me: I shove him in the elevator, close the doors, weld them with my heat vision and break the cables!


GM: I hate you. I really Hate you.

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Our group has more famous quotes by fellow players then I can remember. However one quote in particular just wont seem to go away for us. It happened while I was DMing a nostalgia quest for our group... The Temple of Elemental Evil (not to be confused with Return to the ToEE). Anyways during one of the fights with a particularly powerful priest the said priest blasted this player with a spell which did close to or slightly over fifty pts of dmg. This player looks to the other players and seeing their looks of concern for his well being merely shrugs and says "It's ok guys! I only took a little over half my hit points from that ONE hit!" This was in the opening round of the combat too. The priest still had plenty of spells to throw down with, that was just the first. It will never be said that this player isn't overconfident in just about any situation and he doesn't even take the disadvantage for easy points either. Go figure.

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That was my personal favorite from the Temple of Elemental Supidity (er....Evil) as well Wily....hehe, although Hrenex had his share of good ones too if I do say so myself....but anyway, back on subject the actual quote was:


"It's ok guys, I'm good; I only took a little over half my hit points." and the player (Dr. Lucky on these boards IIRC) wasnt being sarcastic, ironic, clever, or attempting to be humorous -- he was seriously unconcerned.


He's also the same player that broke the Staff of Power against Tharizdun and nuked half the party which I mentioned awhile back in some other post. Fun fun fun..... :D

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GM: Okay, you are hurtling at 32xFTL towards Malva, you have been unable to turn the ship around. What do you do?


Ace( My brother's Character): I teleport to the outside of the ship.


GM: You what?


Ace: We've only been flying for about 25 minutes I'll get myself home. I don't need to breath.


GM: Do you realize what is out there? You are going 32x Light speed at that velocity a dust mote would put a hole in you, do you know how many dust motes there are in space?


Me: At least six.


GM: (pause). Yes Chad, at least six, go to your room.

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Super-Dude (picture surfer that is 6ft tall, 3 of which is mohawk) is flying on his mystical surfboard as we are fighting a 2000ft "Killer Robot" The rest of us have been a bit injured but nothing bad.


Super-Dude: Ok I think I have enough running room for a move-thru.

GM: Ok you set up your move-thru, is there anything your going to do before you start the manuver?

Super-Dude: yea, I'm jumping off my board so it doesn't get messed up when I punch a hole in this guys chest.

-[side note: Super-Dude's powers came from his board, all of them]-

--Moment of silence--

GM: Are you sure?

Super-Dude: yep. cowabunga!!!


We all laughed VERY hard when Nate(Super-Dude) figured out that he was in trouble. He didn't really do a move-thru... well, not exactly.


Flowers were sent to the hospital.

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Quote all you want, we'll say more.


Moondrake, our tough-as-nails, take-no-s... martial artist is out scouring the town in normal ID, looking for whoever has kidnapped his son.


Two normal muggers jump him. One pulls a pistol and says, "Give me your money and you don't get hurt." After he looks down at Moondrake's feet, he adds, "And give me them nice kicks, too."


Moondrake obliged.

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A powerful, flying brick... Tachyon... who had recently been mind controlled by the player charcter Locke (can't remember why... some small thing, actually) was asked how he feels. Tachyon blinks, and stammers, "Cats! I loved Cats! I'll see it again and again!" (Perfectly role played by Matt... who then broke into song with Rum Tum Tugger!)


We fell about the room. Took 20 minutes to get back to the game, and it became the catch phrase. "How do you know Locke has been here?" Glazed looks all around, and everyone mutters, "Cats! I loved Cats! I'll see it again, and again!"




One of the last "all nighters" we ever pulled... back in '93... group of eight or nine players, with two GMs switching off between two simultaneous battles going on in separate parts of the city. Jim has been asleed for a good half hour at this point, as it's like 4:30 am and we've been playing since 7:00 pm. There is a lull in the talking for a moment, and suddenly Jim's head snaps up from the table eyes still closed, drooling, face slack with sleep and gasps, "I'm so WIRED!" and then his head slams back down to the table... out like a light.


We cried.




During a big invasion of a VIPER base, the heavy hitters went to the lowest level to engage in battle with the big baddies. One hero, Vengeance, a master of sword and gun, stayed behind on the floor above, to distract and hold off all the agents. He spent his entire combat in or near the elevator shaft, throwing smoke bombs, shooting and beating up agents. He'd just taken one of their M-203s and launched several concussion grenades back down the hall, out of his smoke cloud. He stood there laughing, hearing the explosions and screams... when suddenly three grenades came "thunk, plunk, tink, rollllll" right back INTO his now fading smoke cloud. The troops had been afraid to fire into their own guys up to that point. Vengeance makes a mad dash for the open elevator shaft, makes a brilliant acrobatics roll, and swings up the ladder, just above the open door, so the explosion goes under him. Seconds pass... smoke clears, and I describe the remaining agents poking their heads up to look at the devastated hallway, littered with the bodies of their comrades, low fires burning... no sign of Vengeance.

A couple of them mutter... "Man! Who WAS that guy?" when Vengeance (perfectly timed by Paul) calls out "Hey! Send more guys! I'm getting bored here!"


The whole play group let out a cheer at that one, it was such a perfectly timed, in character line. Even though he didn't declare it as such... I made it a Presence Attack against the agents. Most ran... the others gave up. It was brilliant!


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Guest Champsguy

Our characters are walking down a street, when a group of enemies leap out and ambush us. Just as they attack, the GM's dice go ice cold, and ours go white-hot. The villains miss just about every attack they fire (rolling 18, 18, 17, 18, etc), until our telepathic brick (Jon-El) Mind Controls one of their group (who then suddenly begins to roll awesomely well as he shoots his former comrades). Growing more and more frustrated, the leader of the enemy group declares: "That's it! Now you'll pay!" and fires his 5D6 RKA heat vision at Jon-El.


GM: "Alright! I hit! Let's see how much damage I do." (roll)

We all stare at the dice on the table. The attack did 6 Body and 6 Stun.

Jon-El: (wipes smudge off chest where heat vision hit him) ".......Do you guys want to start over? We can just go back that way, turn around, and come back and pretend like we don't know you're here. You can jump out at us and try this again."

This was met by a howl of rage from the other side.

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Good Old Pathos


We were in Africa, and about 6 tribesmen were shadowing us. Pathos rushes over, determines they don't speak English, and draws a line in the sand with his 22d6 EB, against the wishes of our martial artist. The warriors run off. An hour later, we walk into a canyon area, look up, and notice about 1,000 of these warriors with spears and such, ready to make us pay. Pathos, looking around at them and knowing it's all his fault mildly offers this apology to the team: "Hm. My bad."

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Originally posted by Captain Obvious

Crapping yourself is a 0-phase action, isn't it?


I believe it depends upon how much you want to crap yourself. Although a Solliquy is a zero phase action, if anyone wants to go for a really long speech, I will begin to count it as a half or full action - how else can you get the ol' squeeze them by the neck in the middle of their tirade to get that lovely "...urrk!" graphic?

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