Re: Creation Myth
Well...
To be honest I don't know if I can truly pick any one thing that really stood out. The overall flow is extremely well done, with huge nods towards native american and similar cultures in the overall feel of the creation myth.
It is extremely consistent and just when i was going to ask a question here and there...it was answered. It explains the current status of the world and leaves plenty of room to expand the lands at a later date.
The writing and characters mesh very well and make the whole believable. though the style isn't original, the application of the various origins, is. That's not to say the style is bad, nonono, quite the opposite. I greatly enjoy the narrative style of stories told by the old shamans as opposed to the regimented and staid style of say...the bible.
Oh, wait...I do have two comments. Towards the middle or so, particularly around the time they are trying to save the world, I get a rushed feeling which is understandable considering the nature of the event, but it does change the pacing of the story, which is unlike the style you begin with. Great for modern writing, but doesn't mesh well with the more ancient tone you seem to be going for.
The second, is on the ending. It's almost like you ran out of steam and just kinda waved your hand with a minor explanation to get up to the current timeline. Of course, this could just be my not wanting it to end.
Overall, an excellent piece of work that I will be saving a copy of for reference, as this is what I wish to attain when I write my history of the "world" and this will be a great reference tool for me.