Dr. Anomaly

Q: Uh...what are all those busted up pieces of DVD doing in that Pepsi bottle? A: Round and round she goes, where she stops, everyone knows!

Q: What's your rank in the Flower Power movement? A: A half cup of snow peas.

Q: How do you know they really liked your homemade fudge? A: About 6 trillion Gauss.

Q: So what'd you do to merit 70 years in prison? A: Just junk it!

When I first started my Champions campaign a number of years ago, I wrote up a 32-page "world summary" that I gave to my players. It included superheroes & supervillains, organizations, countries, the political climate, magic & aliens, etc. Here's the most pertinent paragraph about Australian & New Zealander superheroes: Australia and New Zealand are home to quite a few metanormals, most on the low-to-moderate power level. One exception to this is Southern Cross, Australia’s premier superheroine and one of the most powerful metanormals on the planet. Backing her up, with something of a friendly rivalry, is the loosely-organized group known as ANZAC. They have a dozen ‘regular’ members and over two dozen ‘auxiliary’ members scattered throughout Australia and New Zealand. Their regular membership includes Endeavor (their leader, whose powers are not fully known); Bunyip (the legendary monster); Goanna (former station manager, a half-human / half-lizard hand-to-hand combatant); Kiwi a.k.a. ‘The New Zealand Nightstalker’ (a detective with incredible night vision and sense of smell); Koala Jack (a mutant koala with emotion-controlling powers); Kookabura (an aborigine with very strong but very limited mind control); Quantas (a wind-controlling telekinetic sponsored by the airline); Tasmanian Devil (a fast and furious hand to hand combatant); Wakatipu (a young Maori with the ability to grow into a giant); Wallaby (an outback guide and famous womanizer who appears to be a kangaroo from the waist down); Boomerang (with numerous specialized throwing weapons) and Tuatara (an aged woman who claims to be a sorceress). The reason for the rather scare descriptions is that the handout included what is commonly known, not the actual facts. For instance, Endeavor is a low-scale wind controller with a pistol that never runs out of ammunition and a sword capable of dealing with magical/spiritual foes. And yes, she's descended from whom you'd expect. And I'm perfectly aware there's a difference between a wallaby and a kangaroo...in fact, one of Wallaby's 'hot' buttons is when people mistake his animal half for a kangaroo instead of a wallaby. As I said, the handout contained the common public conception, not necessarily the actual facts. I told the players beforehand that not everything in this document could be relied upon, that there would be some misconceptions and some outright untruths, but did they listen? Nooooo....

Q: What was the last line from the zombie Elvis we ran into last night? A: Lookout below!

Q: Why don't you want to do dust sculpting any more? A: You'll never get a disk drive to fit in there.

Q: What are you doing with ten tons of tungsten carbide grit? A: Completely over the top.

Q: Tell the truth...that isn't really a spontaneous generated lifeform, is it? A: Snickerdoodles. I just love snickerdoodles...especially with carmel syrup.

Q: Can you top this? A: Only on the outside.

Q: Why are you walking down the stairs using only your buttocks? A: There's one in every pair!

What goes good with fillet of titanium alloy? A: Nothing but trouble!

Steve, Given your answer to Monolith's question about Knowledge Skills about People being eligible for the Traveller discount, you might want to take a quick look at this thread, where there's been some debate: http://www.herogames.com/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=11650

In another thread I posted that I'd had business cards printed up for my hero team as well as for my character's secret identity. It can add a lot of realism (as well as fun) to pull out the team card and hand it to an NPC when you tell them "If you find out anything, let us know" (or whatever). The place I got them printed is called VistaPrint. They're running one of their periodic specials right now...250 color business cards FREE, just pay the shipping & handling. The s&h is based on how fast you want them...choose the slowest (21 days) and it's just $5.25. Yes, just five and one-quarter dollars! It's a great and very cheap way to add that extra touch to your games! I've had very good service from them, and at least in my case, my cards have always arrived before the expected date...15 days for an expected 21 days, that sort of thing. If you'd like to give them a try, you can go to VistaPrint and check it out for yourself. I hope someone else finds this as useful/fun as I have!

Q: Given that your powers only function during a blackout, what have you decided to call yourself? A: Milk, milk, and more milk. Oh, yeah...even more milk.

Q: Why are you looking at aliens at the spaceport when you told me you were looking for a new seat cushion? A: A twist-tie and a Cocker Spaniel.

Q: Why are you trying to patent fireproof ski jackets? A: No, the bumps on it are for her.

Unfortunately I don't own any Dr. Who DVDs -- can't afford 'em, darn it! These days I can't even afford new HERO stuff! Now that's a crying shame! By the way S.C., the most powerful hero in my Champions universe (my Superman-type, if you will) is an Australian named Southern Cross! She's been the most powerful hero on the planet for as long as I've been running my champions universe (since a week after 4th ED came out). Life is full of funny coincidences, eh?

Nope...we've seen them a couple of times. Sort of a nauseating little blob-thing about the size of your head, with a few little tentacles/tendrils and (I think) eyes on stalks, though I'm not positive about the latter. It's been a long time since I've seen "Genesis of the Daleks".

K.I.T.T. = "Knight Industries Two Thousand" K.A.R.R. = "Knight Automated Roving Robot" A misspent youth...(sigh)

Q: What's this blank piece of paper, and why do you have it framed? A: It's called "Totally Tuna."

Q: We can't do Terror alert level: Plaid yet because we're missing something. What do we need? A: Because it has a warm caramel center.

Dear Concerned Customer: All the information is fully accurate and complete, and from the future, up until the point that your possession of the information alters your behavior and thus your future. Foresight Enterprises cannot and does not make any claims or guarantees regarding the length of time the information will remain pertinent due to our inability to govern how you will use the information. The time machine may be used for as many trips as you like; the future it reaches, though, will be the future that contains the information/events recorded in the Book About You in your possession, as the time machine in question is the very machine used in gathering the information for the book. Thank you, Foresight Enterprises Customer Service

Oh, yeah, since my character (Dr. Anomaly, alias Dr. Solomon Kinkaid) is half-owner of the building, he has his offices in the hotel as well. His company, Diverse Applications, Ltd. occupies the 18th floor (right below the hero's base) and donates the floor space to the team as a tax write-off. Since I was ordering business cards on the cheap, I went ahead and got some for him, too:

My group is called the Millennium Knights (guess where we're based?) and we have a publicly-known base occupying the top 4 floors of the Majestic, a turn-of-the-century hotel that survived "The Event", but in a somewhat...altered...state. In any case, here's what our business cards look like. I actually had them printed; including shipping, it cost me less than $6.00...yes, under six dollars! Check out VistaPrint from some great deals! Every so often they run a "250 business cards for free, just pay shipping!" introductory special. I highly reccomend them!