Bazza

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Words of wisdom to live by (a funny maxim):
 
Coming second-place means you are first...in a long line of losers.

Re: Complicate the Person Above
 
Death Tribble secretly dances at the House of the Rising Sun. His non de plume is "Fluffy".

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 
Bazza posted a question which is more of a random musing than a straight compliment in the compliment's thread.
 
Well the answer is I rate the Banshees version of Helter Skelter as the best one. I have heard the Beatles version and U2's and the Banshees version is definitely better. It can be found on the Nocturne album and DVD which is a concert at the Royal Albert Hall. The Banshees version starts slow and builds up getting faster and faster and then comes to a dead stop during a repeat of the line When I stop, I stop.

Re: A Thread for Random Mooings
 
To err is human,
To moo bovine.

Re: The cranky thread
 

Agreed. Now if TDKGuy gave us the GrandMaster's e-mil address we could personlly reply. since tht is unlikely to happen, we can't very well get TDKGuy in trouble by blabbing. 
(and beside TDKGuy is a mod of NGD.com ... one has to respect mods.)

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 

I didn't make the cut :weep:

Re: Complicate the Person Above
 
Keyes_Bill can pull a Spawn Of Great Cthulhu from your ear. It's a given icebreaker at parties.

Re: Complicate the Person Above
 
keyes_bill made a small fortune marketting his "Bunny-Bop" line of cute adult toys and novelties, and then lost most of it again in his ongoing legal battles with Playboy Enterprises. We wish him luck.

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
From: http://www.ovalbooks.com/bluff/Internet.html (The Bluffer's Guide to the Internet)
 

 
As so many people post to the NGD from work, it just seemed appropriate, and funny.

Re: "Neat" Pictures
 
Definitely. I'm thinking of avatarring it, but it would be a deviation from my usual theme.
 
Edit: *notes Enforcer84's rep power*
The race is ON!
 
Well, no, not really. I'm pretty sure you'll win.

Re: What Are You Listening To Right Now?
 
Love Ain't for Keeping-- The Who

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Right now, I'm supposed to be working.

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Death Tribble is just jealous...

Re: What Are You Listening To Right Now?
 

 
I'm not that keen on the Incredible String Band, but all the others, yes. I've a good collection of Steeleye, what's available of Nick Drake, some of Sandy's solo stuff (obviously, have a good selection of her stuff with Fairport), a couple of Lindisfarne tracks and plenty of Richard (and Linda) Thompson.
 
Thompson is my guitar god. It took me years to learn how to play 1952 Vincent Black Lightning, and even then I have to strum it (with the lead line) - he finger-picks just way too fast for me.
 

 
Yeah, I love it - in its place. Actually, my fiancee's nicked the CD to take to Kenya with her - she loves it too. Who can argue with lyrics like: I've got a tongue that's ten inches long, and I've learned to breathe through my ears
 

 
I first heard it through the Pogues, but IMO the absolute best version is by June Tabor, from her 1976 album Airs & Graces. She has a beautiful, emotive contralto voice, and sings it a capella. It sends shivers down the spine - I kid you not.
 
Oh, and I ought to add: now playing, Eliza Carthy, The Miller and the Lass. (Yes, she's Martin Carthy's daughter).

Re: What Are You Listening To Right Now?
 

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Nobody is giving me any rep! That's it I'm off! I've had it with the lot of ya. Don't bother locking the door cause I won't be back!
 
 
Well until Oct 8/9th. Tomorrow I start my holidays for one week. I most likely won't get on the HGDB to view the threads unless I stop at a Net cafe at night. So this will probably be the last time I see most of you for a week.
 
take care and be a hero!
 
The one, the only. The BAZZA!

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Nobody is giving me any rep! That's it I'm off! I've had it with the lot of ya. Don't bother locking the door cause I won't be back!
 
 
Well until Oct 8/9th. Tomorrow I start my holidays for one week. I most likely won't get on the HGDB to view the threads unless I stop at a Net cafe at night. So this will probably be the last time I see most of you for a week.
 
take care and be a hero!
 
The one, the only. The BAZZA!

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Today confirmed that I have totally lost the support of management. For a good ten minutes I explained the facts of the last two to three weeks and she did not accept my side of the story. I think I can remember her saying "no, no, no". I don't consider I got a fair hearing despite my discourse and therefore no (social) justice (1).
 
Earlier this week I got a simular complaint brought against me by a whinging member of our "team". Todays experience just confirmed it. And another co-worker is a B!tch.
 
I got to find another job pronto as I can't fully express my feeling with the "swear filter" kicking in.
 
 
(1) I work for a religous sponsored community service/support charity.

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 
Anyone notice that this thread is beating the "other" thread in terms of replies and activity?
 
MUM's the word alright.

Re: "Neat" Pictures
 
continuing the fine tradition -- finger painting
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

May have been posted before, but who cares
 
Disclaimer: We have no wish to offend you unless you're a twit.
 
• If at first you don't succeed, change the rules.
• Anarchy - It's not the law, it's just a good idea.
• The illegal we do immediately. The unconstitutional takes a little longer.
• It's not the principle of the thing. It's the money.
• Eat the rich. The poor are tough and stringy.
• All things considered, insanity may be the only reasonable alternative.
• FNORD
• Just because everything is different doesn't mean anything has changed.
• Sincerity is the key. Once you can fake that, you've got it made.
• The breakfast of champions is the opposition.
• If we do not change our direction we are likely to end up where we are headed.
• Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat.
• Always do right. This will gratify many people, and astonish the rest.
• Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you frantic.
• Decadence is its own reward.
• An honest politician is one who stays bought.
• Organize for anarchy!
• Circular definition: see "circular definition."
• Help! The paranoids are out to get me!
• According to the latest official figures, 43% of all statistics are totally worthless.
• I don't see you, so don't pretend you're there.
• Tell the truth and run.
• He who hesitates is last.
• FNORD
• A wise man knows everything, a shrewd one, everybody.
• Moral victories don't count.
• All vacations and holidays create problems, except for one's own.
• Smile! The Illuminati are watching.
• Everything is controlled by a small evil group to which, unfortunately, no one we know belongs.
• All syllogisms have three parts. Therefore, this is not a syllogism.
• I'll have to put something into their food to make them forget about this.
• We cheat the other guy and pass the savings on to you.
• Don't steal. The government hates the competition.
• Once you give up integrity, the rest is easy!
• A Smith and Wesson beats four aces.
• I don't suffer from insanity. I revel in it.
• Always be smarter than the people who hire you. But never let them know.
• The worst thing about censorship is XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX.
• Don't tell any big lies today. Small ones can be just as effective.
• Smile! It makes them wonder what you're up to.
• For every action there is an equal and opposite government program.
• A censor is a man who thinks he knows more than you ought to.
• If we knew what we were doing, it wouldn't be research.
• The less a politician amounts to, the more he loves the flag.
• Age and treachery will beat youth and skill every time.
• Forecasting is difficult, especially about the future.
• Are you sure? [N] Y
• What if this weren't a hypothetical question?
• All generalizations are incorrect, including this one.
• Join the Illuminati and see the world . . . differently.
• Friends come, and friends go, but enemies accumulate.
• FNORD
• Beware of the superficially profound.
• Truth is stranger than fiction, because fiction has to make sense.
• All law is codified revenge.
• Did you know that "gullible" isn't in the dictionary? Look it up.
• Hail Eris! All hail Discordia!
• If winning doesn't matter, why keep score?
• Objectivity is in the eye of the beholder.
• Smash the state, and have a nice day.
• Abandon all hope ye who PRESS ENTER here.
• No good deed goes unpunished.
• Thoughts good! Slogans bad! Thoughts good! Slogans bad!
• Gotta run, my government's collapsing.
• A friend is someone you call to help you move. A real friend is someone you call to help you move a body.
• Defeat is worse than death, because you have to live with defeat.
• Eschew obfuscation!
• Someone you trust is one of us . . .
• This is a test. This is only a test. Had this been a real emergency, you would all be dead by now.

Re: "Neat" Pictures
 
continuing the fine tradition -- finger painting
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Re: "Neat" Pictures
 
continuing the fine tradition -- finger painting
 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Re: The Last Word
 
The wedding invitation
 
I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend well she was a dream!
 
There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister.
 
My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when quite near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear.
 
It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.
 
One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the Wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome.
 
She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word.
 
She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs.
 
When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me.
 
I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car.
 
My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."
 
 
 
The moral of this story is:
 
Always keep your condoms in your car!

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 
In Honor of Stupid People . . .
 
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.
 
On a Sears hairdryer -- Do not use while sleeping.
(That's the only time I have to work on my hair.)
 
On a bag of Fritos -- You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(the shoplifter special?)
 
On a bar of Dial soap -- "Directions: Use like regular soap."
(and that would be???....)
 
On some Swanson frozen dinners -- "Serving suggestion: Defrost."
(but, it's just a suggestion.)
 
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom) -- "Do not turn upside down."
(well...duh, a bit late, huh!)
 
On Marks &Spencer Bread Pudding -- "Product will be hot after heating."
(...and you thought????...)
 
On packaging for a Rowenta iron -- "Do not iron clothes on body."
(but wouldn't this save me time?)
 
On Boot's Children Cough Medicine -- "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5 year-olds with head-colds off those bulldozers.)
 
On Nytol Sleep Aid -- "Warning: May cause drowsiness."
(...I'm taking this because???....)
 
On most brands of Christmas lights -- "For indoor or outdoor use only."
(as opposed to what?)
 
On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."
(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)
 
On Sainsbury's peanuts -- "Warning: contains nuts."
(talk about a news flash)
 
On an American Airlines packet of nuts -- "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: say what?)
 
On a child's Superman costume -- "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)
 
On a Swedish chainsaw -- "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."
(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)
 
 
 
Now that you've smiled at least once, it's your turn to spread the stupidity and send this to someone you want to bring a smile to (maybe even chuckle)...
 
 
****Blessed are the cracked: for it is they who let in the light*****