Ockham's Spoon

I have fond memories of this game...

It makes me worry when the AI has a mocking sense of humor. I had to change my password the other day (again), and after multiple attempts that didn't meet various password requirements, in frustration I typed in MYPENIS. It came back with an error message saying that was too short.

I am not sure I put too much stock in Rotten Tomato scores. Because of the way they count bad reviews vs. good ones, the result can be pretty skewed. At one point in time recently, the best movie ever made, according to RT scores, was Paddington 2. Now that may have been a swell movie, but I don't think anyone would pick it as the best movie of all time.

If this is a Complication, then there needs to be a downside for the character who is Utterly Evil. That is going to be something along the lines of no one will trust an Utterly Evil character, and most people will actively hate them, probably wanting to kill or imprison them. But notice that only works if it is generally known that the character is Utterly Evil, although it might be enough if they have ticked off enough powerful people, even if their personality isn't widely known.

A car full of Irish nuns is sitting at a traffic light in Dublin when a bunch of rowdy drunks pulls up along-side them. "Show us yer titties!" one of the drunks shouts, with encouraging hoots from his friends. The Mother Superior is shocked, and says to Sister Mary sitting next to her "I don't think those hooligans know who we are! Show them your cross Sister Mary." So Sister Mary leans out the window and yells "Piss off, you fookin' little wankers before I come over there and rip yer balls off!" She turns back to the Mother Superior and asks "Did that sound cross enough?"

My wife called from upstairs "Hey, do you ever get a shooting pain through your body, like somebody has a voodoo doll of you and is stabbing it?" I replied "Um, no..." She responded "Okay, how about now?"

People are finally starting to socialize more now that they're vaccinated, and nice as it is, I am already hearing people complain about $7 beers, $10 parking, and $20 cover charge. All I have to say is that if you don't like those prices, stop coming to my house.

Due to budget cuts, the boss had to lay someone off, and he had narrowed it down to either Mary or Jack. It was a hard decision because they were both good workers. So he somewhat arbitrarily decided that he would fire whichever one of them was the first to use the water cooler the next day. As it so happened, Mary had been at a party the previous night and was suffering from a hangover, so early in the morning she was at the cooler to get some water to wash down an aspirin. The boss goes up to her and says "Mary, I have never done this before, but I have to either lay you or Jack off." Mary sighs "Could you just jack off? I feel like hell this morning."

Hate to say it, but I have a bunch of old VCR cassettes (including my wedding video) but no way to play them.

Two mafia hit-men are walking deep in the woods in the middle of the night. One of the says "This forest is kinda spooky. I gotta admit I am a little scared." The other replies "You're scared? I'm the one who is going to have to walk back alone!"

I don't mean to brag, but it only took me one week to finish a jigsaw puzzle even though the box said 2 to 4 years

When I am an old man with grandchildren, I will tell them about the great toilet paper shortage of 2020 when we had drag our butts across the lawn to wipe them, In the snow, Uphill, both ways, Dodging murder hornets

Two guys, one in a green jacket and one in a blue jacket, are arguing over which of them is more badass. As they pass a bakery, the guy in blue dares the guy in green to steal some buns. So Green goes into the bakery, and surreptitiously swipes three buns, stuffs them in his pockets, and saunters back outside. "Okay, now it is your turn." says Green "You're an amateur." says Blue "Watch this." Blue goes into the store and asks the baker if he would like to see a magic trick. The baker agrees. Blue asks him to hold his jacket, and then asks for a bun. The baker takes the jacket and hands Blue the bun. Blue eats the bun and asks for a second. The baker, still holding onto the jacket, gives him a second bun. Blue eats this one also, and asks for one more. The baker, interested to see where this is going, hands him the third bun, which Blue also eats. "Okay, now where is the magic trick?" the baker asks. Blue responds "Go look in the pockets of that guy out there in the green jacket."

A flight attendant asks one of the passengers how he likes his coffee. Fancying himself a player, he says "I like my coffee the way I like my women." The flight attendant responds "Don't worry honey, the coffee is free. You don't have to pay for it here."

The missing posters in this are my favorite detail

A cabbie picks up a nun, but can't stop looking at her. She asks him why he is staring and he says "This is going to sound silly, but I have always wanted to kiss a nun." After a moment's thought, the nun says "Well, I will kiss you, but only if you are single and Catholic." The cabbie says "Great, I'm both!" The nun proceeds to kiss him in a way that would make a hooker blush. When the cabbie gets his breath back he says, "I'm sorry, but I lied. I am actually married and a Baptist." The nun says "That's okay. My name is Kevin and I am on my way to a costume party."