Netzilla

From my youngest girl at the beginning of the last session.
Daughter/Alley Cat - "We aren't going there.  I'm supposed to keep Jack safe.  So we aren't going there."
Me/GM - "So what are you planning to do?"
Daughter/Alley Cat - "Chicken burritos.  They're safe."
 

Part 2 of Stroke of Death:
 
I forgot to say that, in the Heronet Herald article about "Dr. Draconis" breaking Requiem out of Stronghold, mention was made that a few weeks before, Dr. Draconis had been in a battle with the "Virginia Alliance for Global Intervention and National Aid," during which his armor had gotten badly damaged.
 
Pops:  Is that superhero team actually called VAGINA?
GM:  They're a loose group of heroes who refused to give their team a name.  So the Heronet Herald editor gave them one.
Malarky:  It's the GM's way of saying it's time for us to pick a team name.
 
In response to TJ O'Rourke and BEST, Malarky and Maker set up a website and an email address for the team, even though they still haven't picked a name.
 
A freak earthquake levels a deserted town in Pennsylvania at 12:02 pm, after which the major networks reveal that they had each received CDs that morning with video files of Requiem demanding the US government abdicate in favor of Deathstroke ruling the country, and threatening to destroy whole cities until that happens.  He said that as a demonstration, they would level Curtin Village, Pennsylvania at noon.
 
Honey Badger:  A CD?  Really?  How 1990s.
GM:  Well, he has been in prison for over a decade.
 
Shortly after that, the team begins getting repeated emails from two local reporters (Nadine Acer at the local CBS affiliate and Joshua Petersen from the local Fox station) and Tommy Dugan (son of Jimmy "Gyro Jim" Dugan), all requesting interviews with the hero team about Deathstroke.
 
Honey Badger:  What makes them think we know anything about it?  We've never even fought them before.
 
Honey Badger gets a call from TJ O'Rourke, saying that he received a CD with a video file he thinks the heroes need to see.  From a completely different angle (up above and to the side) it shows Requiem filming his demands (requiring three takes), and then walking over to a table to go over maps and diagrams with Stinger and Death Commando.  The CD also contains diagrams and notes about a device that projects earthquake-like resonant vibrations at a distant location.
 
Maker:  So can I make a gadget that will detect that device?
GM:  Sure... the next time it's used.  Do you want to wait until then?
 
The notes on the CD include computations of the frequency and amplitude waves showing that Curtin Village, PA is approximately 590 km from the quake device. 
 
Malarky:  We'll draw a circle on the map and start checking out towns along the line.
GM:  Like, Boston?  Because the line passes right through your hometown.
 
The heroes look up info on the members of Deathstroke.
 
GM:  ... and the strawberry blonde there is Scatterbrain, the team's mentalist.
Circe:  Strawberry blonde?  Does she look familiar to me?
GM:  As a matter of fact, she does kinda resemble the girl in the bar who whammied Pop Tart.
 
The heroes take a multi-prong approach:  Shadowboxer and Maker begin researching and checking out disused underground spaces (old subway stations, etc.) in town, while Circe tries to Mind Scan for Scatterbrain.  Eventually Circe get a few bearings, narrowing the search area for Shadowboxer and Maker, and they locate an unusual space under a disused storage building -- a sizable section of abandoned subway tunnel has been blocked off with concrete.  In the storage building above, Shadowboxer spies on a group of heavily-armed hired thugs, so the heroes block off the door leading to the staircase and get ready to force open the armored door leading into the main part of the underground base.
 
Pops:  Remember, take out the mentalist.  They're evil.  Every last one.
Circe:  One of these days, I'm going to find myself about a mile up in the air, falling to my death, aren't I?
GM:  Right next to the monsignor.
Circe:  (looks to his right)  Oh, hey, Monsignor Vasquez.  How's it going?
 
Inside, they find Nadine Acer holding a camcorder, interviewing Requiem while the other members of Deathstroke and a squad of agents are scattered around the room, some checking on the Quake device while others are killing time.  The battle is joined, with Honey Badger going straight for Death Commando.  The villain hits the hero, doing basically no damage past his defenses.
Honey Badger:  What was that?  You hitting me with a feather?
Draconic:  (to Death Commando)  What's wrong, old man?  Having a little trouble there?
 
Scatterbrain decides to have some fun with Honey Badger and hits him with a Mental Illusion making her look like Pop Tart. 
 
Scatterbrain:  Why don't you and I go somewhere and have a little fun?
Honey Badger:  Oh, no, she's doing it again.  I'd better call Twizzler again.
GM:  Sorry, no cell phone reception in the bunker.
 
Nexus blasts Draconic, drawing his attention.  So he does a flying tackle, taking her down to the ground.
 
Draconic:  Woo, hoo!  Hey, babe, ain't this fun?
Nexus:  (OOC)  He's going to get grabby, isn't he?
GM:  Worse than that.  He's going to motorboat Nexus' breasts.
Honey Badger:  He's going to regret that he's wearing a full helmet.
Nexus:  This guy's an a**hole.
GM:  Yeah, basically, that's what I've been trying for.
Nexus:  (to Malarky)  Can't you do something about this guy?
Malarky:  (hits Draconic with a Flash vs. all senses)  At least he can't enjoy himself now.
 
Malarky had trapped Death Commando and the agents in a thorny AoE Entangle, and Death Commando had just broken free.
 
Nexus:  (to Death Commando)  A little help here?
Death Commando:  (looks down at Draconic, then to Malarky)  Temporary truce?
Malarky:  (shrugs)  Sure, what the heck?
Death Commando:  Be right back.  (climbs back into the thorny mass and comes back out with one of the agents' laser pistols)  D**kweed here doesn't realize that Draconis's armor is vulnerable to lasers.  Do you, D**kweed?  (blasts Draconic with the laser, stunning him and doing 4 BODY past defenses.)  Not bad for an 'old man', is it, D**kweed?
Malarky:  The worst part is, Draconic is blind and deaf and doesn't know what just happened.
GM:  Actually, he has some Flash Defense.  He regained the ability to see and hear just before Death Commando took the shot.
 
The heroes have most of Deathstroke on the ropes.
 
Death Commando:  Well, I'm out of here.  Take it easy.
Malarky:  I'll fist-bump him as he goes past.
 
Pops is standing near an alcove where the concealed exit is, and where Death Commando is heading.
 
Death Commando:  Yaaaaaa! 
GM:  It looks like he tries a Move Through, but he barely misses Pops by... (holds hands about three feet apart) ... this much.
 
Honey Badger:  You know, Nadine got the whole fight on film.
Malarky:  Too bad that camera's going to have a little accident.  (Holds one of his magical foci)  Probably due to Chiller's little blizzard.  Too much cold isn't good for electronics, y'know?

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you... the Mississippi Avengers.
 

 
Edit: A friend suggested "Gulf Coast Avengers" as a better name, and I agree - its more consistent with the existing Avengers names/

No, that's the legend.  Road Warrior was the documentary.
 
If an Australian Outback populated by mutants with severe road rage is wrong, I don't want to be right.

No, that's the legend.  Road Warrior was the documentary.
 
If an Australian Outback populated by mutants with severe road rage is wrong, I don't want to be right.

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
First, our cast:

Dayla - Healer/Smiter of Evil
Gilred - Assassin/Shadow Mage
Griffin - Taxidermist/Generalist Mage
Lythnader - Knife-Thrower/Rune Mage
Osric - Hunter/Warrior
 
****
 
Osric: I am Osric, Beast Slayer... and I want my mommy.
 
****
 
Osric (OOC): I took a contract. I'm honorable [looks at character sheet], I think.
 
****
 
[The group has just captured what could be best described as a snake-hobbit; think snake-man only hobbit sized. We took to calling it a snobbit. Dayla decides to question it.]
 
Dayla: Did you kill anyone?
Snobbit: shakes head no
Dayla: Are you lying to me?
Snobbit: shakes head no
Dayla: Okay.
Gilred [aside to Lythander]: I think we need to work on her interrogation technique.
 
****
 
Gilred: Unfortunately, I don't carry around blunt weapons. It's a lot harder to plunge one into someone's back.
 
****
 
[The group has spent the last few sessions tracking down an escaped chimera. The alchemist/wizard that created it had "disposed" of the failed experiment in the sewers. Lythander has been ranting about just how annoyed he is with this level of irresponsibility.]
 
Gilred [writes on a piece of payer and passes it to Lythander]: This is my standard fee.
GM [OOC]: I need to make him a villain.
Lythander [OOC]: You did.
Gilred [OOC]: I like to think of him as an employment opportunity.
 
****
 
Lythander: I'm not paying for him to be killed. I'm paying not to be implicated.
 
****
 
NPC Messenger: Which one of you is in charge?
Gilred: That depends, is this good news or bad news?
NPC Messenger: You all need to report to the castle immediately.
Gilred: Right, bad news. [Points at Lythander] He's in charge.
 
****
 
Griffin: Who died and left you in charge?
Gilred: Who do I have to kill?
 
****
 
[One of our side-plots is that an impostor within the local assassins guild has given Gilred an assignment to kill Griffin.]
 
[As Griffin is discussing the dangers of rescuing the king from an army of vampire-spawn besieging the castle.]
 
Gilred [to Griffin]: Don't worry, if you die I'll take the credit and get the money. That way you won't have died in vain.
 
****
 
[The group get's attacked by a group of vampire-spawn.]
 
Gilred [to Lythander]: Right, you take the 4 on the left and we'll take the other one.
 
****
 
Osric: You bastards!
Griffin: You monkeys!
Together: You monkey bastards!
 
["Monkeys!" has become Dayla's player's substitute swear-word of choice. She works in a day-care center.]
 
****
 
Gilred: There's something ironic about going for the jugular on a vampire spawn.

I guess Beyond Thunderdome was the music video to said documentary.

...I thought the first Mad Max was a documentary

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
Our Firefly crew needed to steal metal from a space transport ship with a crew of five and was kicking around plans and debating how much violence we were willing to use.
 
Engineer: "I'd prefer the plan that doesn't include mass murder."
 
Pilot: "Is five really 'mass'?"

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
These are from our last bi-weekly Saturday superhero game:
 
The group is searching for a magical gateway wherein an important NPC may be hiding. One of the group mages (yes, we've got 2 on a superhero team), Kendrick, has been there, but it was over 1000 years ago, so he doesn't remember exactly where it is.
 
Ghost Hunter: How come you magic types never write stuff like this down?
 
Kendrick: Hey, that's a good idea.
 
============
 
Solar, nuclear physicist and walking atmoic reactor, is having problems changing back into his super ID. The rest of the team is trying to help him out:
 
Ghost Hunter: Have you ever thought scientifically about how you became Solar in the first place?
 
Solar: Yes, it's quite impossible.
 
============
 
In the previous game, we'd been attacked by a Qliphothic beast. This time, we're being attacked by a pack of demons. After getting the description:
 
Ghost Hunter's player: So, this is a much more normal demon.
 
============
 
Solar, in human form and with no time to change, is about to be attacked by a demon:
 
One of the other players: Abort to Desolid!
 
Solar's player: A fine red mist is Desolid, right?
 
============
 
SCUBA may be able to remember some others.

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
These are from our last bi-weekly Saturday superhero game:
 
The group is searching for a magical gateway wherein an important NPC may be hiding. One of the group mages (yes, we've got 2 on a superhero team), Kendrick, has been there, but it was over 1000 years ago, so he doesn't remember exactly where it is.
 
Ghost Hunter: How come you magic types never write stuff like this down?
 
Kendrick: Hey, that's a good idea.
 
============
 
Solar, nuclear physicist and walking atmoic reactor, is having problems changing back into his super ID. The rest of the team is trying to help him out:
 
Ghost Hunter: Have you ever thought scientifically about how you became Solar in the first place?
 
Solar: Yes, it's quite impossible.
 
============
 
In the previous game, we'd been attacked by a Qliphothic beast. This time, we're being attacked by a pack of demons. After getting the description:
 
Ghost Hunter's player: So, this is a much more normal demon.
 
============
 
Solar, in human form and with no time to change, is about to be attacked by a demon:
 
One of the other players: Abort to Desolid!
 
Solar's player: A fine red mist is Desolid, right?
 
============
 
SCUBA may be able to remember some others.

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
These are from our last bi-weekly Saturday superhero game:
 
The group is searching for a magical gateway wherein an important NPC may be hiding. One of the group mages (yes, we've got 2 on a superhero team), Kendrick, has been there, but it was over 1000 years ago, so he doesn't remember exactly where it is.
 
Ghost Hunter: How come you magic types never write stuff like this down?
 
Kendrick: Hey, that's a good idea.
 
============
 
Solar, nuclear physicist and walking atmoic reactor, is having problems changing back into his super ID. The rest of the team is trying to help him out:
 
Ghost Hunter: Have you ever thought scientifically about how you became Solar in the first place?
 
Solar: Yes, it's quite impossible.
 
============
 
In the previous game, we'd been attacked by a Qliphothic beast. This time, we're being attacked by a pack of demons. After getting the description:
 
Ghost Hunter's player: So, this is a much more normal demon.
 
============
 
Solar, in human form and with no time to change, is about to be attacked by a demon:
 
One of the other players: Abort to Desolid!
 
Solar's player: A fine red mist is Desolid, right?
 
============
 
SCUBA may be able to remember some others.

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 

 
NP: Everyone's picking on me. This game is too hard. I quit.
 
GM: Why is my player base so stagnant?
 
Hero Games: Why are our sales not going up? Where are all the new players?
 
Off topic to the thread, but maybe the new player would have a better time, and be up to speed faster, if someone actually helped them, instead of yelling at them and abusing them for making errors. I like to get an experienced player to "buddy" the new player for a few sessions (freeing the GM from this task).