Klytus

Q: How is it so easy for folks with mediocre talent - like Celine Dion - to get so full of themselves? A: Chaka Gengis Khan Noonian Sing By the way, Worldmaker, it isn't so much that I can't think of anything else, but more a test of the creativity of the folks on the board in comming up with creative ways to link them.

Q: Why did baseball fail to catch on in Victorian Transylvania? A: A loaf of bread, a jug of wine, and a bowling ball.

Q: What does the warning sign inside the atomic deli say? A: A pile of gold, thunderbolts from Zeus and an atmoic wedgie.

Q: Why aren't you wearing your battle armor under your clothes in your secret ID? A: Ice skates and trampolenes, but never an octopus.

Q: What color of glow-in-the-dark condom do you use? A: The Leather Bandersnatch of Mars

Re: Re: Pardon, but... Have I mentioned lately how much I hate it when I reply to a post only to find out that two people have beat me to it?

Question: What is best not to attempt alone by diving out of an airplane? Answer: A solar flare with a touch of lemon - but leave out the cats.

Maps? It has MAPS?? Damn! Now I need to buy it.

Q: May I give your wolverene a wedgie? A: Seabiscut, Sony & Cher, and a 1920's style death ray.

Q: What did Wierd Al wear to the Grammy Awards because he - once again - did not receive a nomination? Answer: The Knick, the Knack and the Knock.

Q: Is it possible to have trained attack war hamsters wipe out the Iraqi resistance? A: Tomato flavored frozen goodness.

Question: For $100,000, would you be willing to do gay porn? Answer: Seven times before they finally got it right.

Q: What is another non-sequiter having to do with automobiles? A: The big films, movie stars, and fish.

Question: Um, Foxbat... why did you just encase Defender in the steel, and not the concrete, ball before tossing him out of the plane? Answer: An Oxford unabridged dictionary and a rabbid New Zealand Moose

Q: What was the Master of Oliver Twist's orphanage once overheard saying to his friends? A: The Crimson-Maned Cruller Craver

Question: After your last Twilight Zone style adventure, what was the one thing your character was left wearing at the end? A: Gem encrusted earwigs

Q: what are the last two components for the latest Foxbat "Master Plan"? A: Naked ladies and barbells, but never vampries.

Q: What drinks go well with french fries? A: Tonque and Trouble

Q: In the Chinese version of "The Twelve Days of Christmas", which lyric follow "Three Fortune Cookies"? Answer: Naked Attack Marshmellows

And then there was this conversation about evil D&D clerics. Player 1: "Evil clerics have it made. They can command the undead to do their bidding." Player 2: "Yo! Go to the river and do my laundry!" Player 3: "Eww! Who wants bits of dead flesh on your clothes?" Player 4: "That's why you use skeletons." Player 2: "Exactly! And then when the skeletons are done with the washing, they can double as a drying rack." I have some wierd friends...

I can't believe I'm the only one with a group that can kick out good quotes here lately... This is from a Vampire game we play in. The main character in question is Chance (i.e. Lucky) LeBlanc, a gambler. He has a girlfrend named Franchesca. Player 1: "So, Chance, are you feeling lucky?" Chance: "No. That's Francesca's job" Player 2: "Wait a minit -- you named your ::ahem:: 'Lucky'?" Player 3: "Wll it sure beats Mr. Happy!" Chance: "No... that's Francesca's job!"

Question: What is only slightly less rare than an electable Radical Liberal? Answer: A solar powered ferret and an atomic duck, but not an electric badger.

::mutters:: I hate posting at the same time someone else does and getting beaten to the punch! Especially whern I thought I had a really COOL question. That makes 3 times so far on this thread... Question: What two presents is "Q" from Star Trek TNG equaly likely to give you for your birthday? Answer: Winding the Brass Giraffe.

What flavor of edible panties never generated any sale? Q: A Catholic Ninja, a Buddhist Paladin, and a Moslem Viking.

What do men consider to be good luck for a wedding instead of that "Something old, something new.." crap? Answer: A coal burning hand-portable air conditioner.