BoloOfEarth

Nicola Tesla. Because he's, like, dead and all.

(After the famous "I'll be back" quote in Terminator) Arnold walks back into the police station. "Excuse me. Do you validate parking?"

Dick "Grayhawk" Sidney and Jason "Raven" Kikkoman had each been apprentices for the Chiroptera before his untimely torture/killing at the hands of several of his foes. They banded together to get revenge upon those foes, but in the process became branded as villains themselves. Not only that, they found they kinda liked walking on the dark side of the street. Even though the media were calling them criminals, other criminals refused to work with or otherwise trust them, so they decided to change their outfits and names. Greyhawk's powers allowed him to transform himself into a shadow for a short time and step from one shadow to another (he referred to it as "stepping through to the other side"), so he took the new name of Side. Raven's focus was in martial arts (specializing in a series of devastating kicks), and he really didn't care much for the whole "change names and looks" idea, so he simply went with the name Kick. Together, of course, they are called Side Kick.

He really should do something about that droopy eye.

"I'm sorry, but you're no longer an Ivy League school..."

NT: Next Olympic venue, even worse that Sochi.

Sing "Let It Snow" and giggle hilariously.

"They took away his gun and his badge. But they couldn't take away his love of the law. Too bad he's a blithering idiot. Adam Sandler is... Dumb Justice."

Singing "It's mine! It's mine!" while dancing around the room naked and rubbing the boxset all over your body. (Dang it, now, where did I put that brain bleach?)

I think this is more like a Dumb Justice System story.

Actually, Michael's post is a comment on a response. So for the third: Petey decides to get every hair on his body curled (including eyebrows and nose hair). After all, he is the Mascot of Curling. NT: Reasons for Michael's (perhaps unhealthy) fixation on Petey the Stone Cold Penguin (Mascot of the sport of Curling).

Personally, I'd make Mechanon's code something that only kicks in days or weeks after the cheap VIPER robots have been handily defeated, torn apart, and dumped in the nearest junkyard for scrap. At the Big M's order, they're now trying to come together to form a mega-robot. Imagine various small robot parts that police or bystanders collected after the fight as souvenirs, now all over the city -- a robotic hand or foot here, a gyroscopic eye there -- all trying to make their way to the junkyard. (Ever see Iron Giant? That bit at the end is what I'm imagining.) By the time the heroes figure it out, a majority of the parts have already come together to form a pretty tough customer. Maybe it remembers how the heroes defeated its components parts and learned how to protect itself. Or perhaps it's protected by a force dome that the heroes can't get past... but the parts are rolling/hopping right through, so maybe they can sabotage the parts to cause the mega-bot to self-destruct before it's complete and goes on a rampage.

"You say you had to duck out in the middle of Dr. Kiloblast's attack on the offices of the Daily World? To return an overdue movie rental? (pause) Okay, seems reasonable." "You're a freelance photojournalist who somehow always gets pics of Arachno-boy. Including pictures that look like they were taken upside-down from up in the rafters. (pause) Wow, what incredible luck and photographic skill you must have!" In each case, Daydream Believer simply stood off to the side and smiled at a job well done. Debbie Verlander has been a mentalist since she was a teenager. She can't read minds, or create mental illusions, or make people follow her commands. She can, however, make people believe that what they're told (no matter how unlikely) is the God's-honest truth, and can also make people ignore the seemingly obvious. Of course, as a teenager this came in very handy, and helped Debbie avoid a lot of groundings and other trouble from the 'rents. However, it didn't help her at all when she was nearly killed by falling debris during a super-battle at the local mall. Only the quick actions of Quarterflash saved her from getting squashed flat. Unfortunately, his mask was ripped loose and he was knocked unconscious by falling debris. As the villain escaped, people gathered around, snapping cell phone pictures and video of the fallen hero. Debbie thought quickly. He had saved her life, and now it was her chance to save his. "Wow, it's a good thing the real Quarterflash was around!" she said. "This kid in a homemade Quarterflash costume tried to save me, but the real Quarterflash saved both of us!" She pointed toward the other end of the mall. "I think he went that way!" As everybody looked away, she helped a stunned Quarterflash get to this feet and spirited him away before anybody could begin asking questions. Ever since that day, Debbie knew that her powers, though not impressive, could help others continue performing heroic activities without fear of reprisals. She took the name Daydream Believer, letting people speculate that she can create mental illusions of some sort.

They really should arm that cop with more than a clock. It's embarrassing, and hard to holster.

Get stoned, naturally.

"Hi! I'm from (insert name of political party you don't like), and I'm here to help!"

"In addition, this year I have greatly expanded my ability to creatively hide the bodies of students who failed the exam." NT: Where is Cancer creatively hiding the bodies?

Somehow I think the Japanese just don't quite understand the concept of vehicular camouflage.

I've found that the video becomes 50% better if you turn off the speakers. It becomes 100% better if you also turn off the monitor.

"Send in your cash now, and after I receive the first $100,000, I'll start forecasting warmer weather." NT: NASA receives a radio message from bona-fide aliens from outside our solar system. What does it say?

I thought it was turtles, all the way down.

Change "Father, Son, and Holy Spirit" to "Big Daddy, Junior, and The Spook".

One of the players in a past Champions game decided his character (Squeeze) was Hunted by a young woman known as Diamond Kitty, who was apparently infatuated with Squeeze. So I shamefacedly stole borrowed the plot of one of the early Black Cat appearances in Spider-Man, where she was stealing rare romantic objects, with the intention of giving them to him to win his love. It worked rather well. I'm sure I've used other comic book plotlines, but that's the only one that comes immediately to mind.

The chimney leads directly to the heart of the fusion reactor. NT: With the high price of coal, what is Santa going to use instead?

The same thing we do every Christmas Day, Pinky! Try and take over the world!