McCoy Posted August 25, 2004 Report Share Posted August 25, 2004 Got involved in a D&D game. Long story. Anyway, my character decided she shou have a battle cry based on the Dozens, specifically "Yor Momma" insults. Seemed like a good idea at the time. Now I need some Momma one liners approperate for the milenu. "Yor Momma so Ugly, she had to hanf a lamb chop from her neck to get the warg to play wit her!" "Yor Momma so bowlegged, when she sits around the dungeon, she sits around the dungeon." "Yor Momma so fat, a halfling mistook her for a housing development." Any suggestions? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Briguy123 Posted August 25, 2004 Report Share Posted August 25, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Yo' Mama's so big that if she were made of stones she'd be a castle. Yo' Mama's flail doesn't have a full length of chain. Yo' mama's so ugly she could win a staring contest with a basilisk. Yo' mama's so stupid she lost an argument with a zombie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McCoy Posted August 25, 2004 Author Report Share Posted August 25, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Thank you! Excelent start! Touught of another one. "Yo' Momma so wrinkled, she trapped a water elemental in her face!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gary Ciaramella Posted August 26, 2004 Report Share Posted August 26, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Yo' mama's so ugly, she turns undead with her face! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CourtFool Posted August 26, 2004 Report Share Posted August 26, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Yo' mama's so ugly orc children run from her in fear. Yo' mama's so ugly even the 10' pole won't touch her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobGreenwade Posted August 26, 2004 Report Share Posted August 26, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Your mama's so ugly, your grandparents used to leave her crib on the front porch at night to scare away vampires. Your mama's so stupid, she could be outwitted by a zombie. Your mama's so fat, when Giants play handball with her, they really play handball with her. Your mama's so old, even a lich wouldn't date her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Greatwyrm Posted August 26, 2004 Report Share Posted August 26, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Yo mama so fat, all of Bigby's hands couldn't keep her in one spot. Yo mama stink so bad, she makes ghasts cry. Yo mama so ugly, she coulda' been dead in second edition. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest joen00b Posted August 26, 2004 Report Share Posted August 26, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Yo momma's so hairy, it looks like she has a bugbear in a headlock. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blue Jogger Posted August 26, 2004 Report Share Posted August 26, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Yo momma is so ugly, she don't need to use Protection spells. Yo momma is so ugly, clerics keep trying to dispel the curse. Yo momma is so ugly, mummy rot would be an improvement. Yo momma is so stupid, she thought light spells would make her thinner. Yo momma is so stupid, she couldn't become a fighter. Yo momma is so fat, she needs *two* cloaks of elvenkind to cover her. Yo momma is so fat, she wears horseshoes of speed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PhilFleischmann Posted August 26, 2004 Report Share Posted August 26, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed I know I shouldn't but... Yo mama's so fat, Kal-Turak's Wall was created by her falling down. Yo mama's so fat, when she swims in Lake Mhorec, the water goes up three inches. Yo mama's so fat, you need area effect on your healing spell to heal her. Yo mama's so fat, she can buy all her powers OIF-Bulky. Yo mama's so ugly, Blindness is an advantage in this campaign. Somebody stop me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McCoy Posted August 27, 2004 Author Report Share Posted August 27, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Somebody stop me. No! Don't stop! More! And thank you everyone! Guess this works in any venue: Yo' Momma so fat in the summertime she rents out shade! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Briguy123 Posted August 27, 2004 Report Share Posted August 27, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Yo' momma's so stinky she turned a dragon vegetarian! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dbsousa Posted August 27, 2004 Report Share Posted August 27, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Yer Momma's so ugly, the orcs who raided her village told her they "Liked her, as a friend!" "Yer momma's so fat, she counts as 1-3 creatures when summoned!" "Yer momma's so evil, the drow cross the street to avoid her! "Yer momma's so chaotic, fish blanket spackle!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lazarus Posted August 27, 2004 Report Share Posted August 27, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed "Yer momma's so chaotic' date=' fish blanket spackle!"[/quote'] Gold. Laz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archangel Gabri Posted August 27, 2004 Report Share Posted August 27, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed "Yer momma's so chaotic, fish blanket spackle!" Sheer genius. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lrojas Posted August 27, 2004 Report Share Posted August 27, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed i dont get it... can some one explain? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
proditor Posted August 28, 2004 Report Share Posted August 28, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed "Yer momma's so chaotic' date=' fish blanket spackle!"[/quote']That's so brilliant I may have to steal it and use it elseboard for my sig. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobGreenwade Posted August 28, 2004 Report Share Posted August 28, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed Your mama's so ugly even scorpions won't sting her. Your mama's so smelly even trolls tell her to take a bath. Your mama's so old even Kal-Turak calls her "ma'am." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lrojas Posted August 28, 2004 Report Share Posted August 28, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed "Yer momma's so chaotic' date=' fish blanket spackle!"[/quote'] can someone please explain to me what is so funny about this phrase? i am just curios as to why it prompted such comments as "Perfect!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McCoy Posted August 28, 2004 Author Report Share Posted August 28, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed can someone please explain to me what is so funny about this phrase? i am just curios as to why it prompted such comments as "Perfect!" It's one of those "If you have to ask the question" things, but I'll try. What does "chaotic" mean? What does "fish blanket spackle" mean? The humor is in the logical disconnect, "Yo' Momma so chaotic the rest of this insult makes no sense." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lrojas Posted August 28, 2004 Report Share Posted August 28, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed It's one of those "If you have to ask the question" things, but I'll try. What does "chaotic" mean? What does "fish blanket spackle" mean? The humor is in the logical disconnect, "Yo' Momma so chaotic the rest of this insult makes no sense." thanks, i kind of get it know... was looking at it from the wrong angle, i thought it was a reference to something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowcat1313 Posted August 29, 2004 Report Share Posted August 29, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed how to really insult a demon prince "Your mother was a red cross volunteer who gave cookies to paladins children" how to really insult a klingon or other warlike race] "Your Mother Didnt wear Combat Boots" for an ork: "I hear your mother bathed in rose water, and liked it" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shadowcat1313 Posted August 29, 2004 Report Share Posted August 29, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed ooops I forgot an old standby "your mother swims out to meet troopships" and you could throw in "and they threw her back" but thats from something called "The Limerick Song" which is best left untold or just google for it if you must Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McCoy Posted August 29, 2004 Author Report Share Posted August 29, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed ooops I forgot an old standby "your mother swims out to meet troopships" Maybe run a combination on this, "Yo' Momma so stinky, last time she had a bath was when she swam out to meet the troop ships!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted August 29, 2004 Report Share Posted August 29, 2004 Re: "Yor Momma" one liners needed My cousin invented this one. To a minotaur: "Hey! Didn't my mother used to milk your mother?" My own contribution to insulting minotaurs: (Showing it a steak or a burger) "Friend of yours?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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