Tim Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Q: How did you hide the 1 hex hole in the wall? A: Sawhorse shoes Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 5, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by Tim A: Sawhorse shoes Q: What is useless unless you are taking a sawhorse for a walk? A: Useless under any circumstances Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by Tim A: Sawhorse shoes Q: So what was the big thing to come out of the Construction Fashion Show? A: An embarrassingly large amount of cream cheese. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by Klytus A: Useless under any circumstances Q: How do you discribe the Average politician? Originally posted by lemming A: An embarrassingly large amount of cream cheese. Q: Damn, it reeks in here! What did you have for lunch? A: First it was light, then it was dark. Then Light, then dark. light. Dark. Light. Dark. Then I sneezed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 5, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by Tim A: First it was light, then it was dark. Then Light, then dark. light. Dark. Light. Dark. Then I sneezed. Q: What happened when you turned on the strobe light? A: Dogs, cats, and 20 yards of bubble gum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kara Zor-El Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by Klytus A: Dogs, cats, and 20 yards of bubble gum. Q: So, what caused the big brouhaha at the Westminster Dog Show? A: I tell you, he's an attack penguin! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoneDaddy Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by Kara Zor-El Q: So, what caused the big brouhaha at the Westminster Dog Show? A: I tell you, he's an attack penguin! Q: Dude, your new butler sucks! Why did he bite me? A: Andy Dufresne probably killed his wife, after all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kara Zor-El Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by BoneDaddy A: Andy Dufresne probably killed his wife, after all. Q: You say the suspect took out extra life insurance on his wife two days before she died? A: I have no clue who Andy Dufresne is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spectrum Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by Kara Zor-El A: I have no clue who Andy Dufresne is. Q: Do you know Andy Dufrense? A: Maybe it's the plad wire. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoneDaddy Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by Kara Zor-El Q: You say the suspect took out extra life insurance on his wife two days before she died? A: I have no clue who Andy Dufresne is. Q: What happens when someone makes oblique references to Shawshank Redemption? A: And that, Ladies and Gentlemen of the Jury, is why my client COULD NOT have been driving the car that fateful, tragic night. http://www.local6.com/news/2892310/detail.html Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BoneDaddy Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by Spectrum A: Maybe it's the plad wire. [/b] Q: How do you defuse a suicide kilt? A: Chicken Whatsitoya. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Q: What's that you're eating? A: When in the intercourse of human events. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Q. What phrase when read in a textbook or spoken on radio or television is likely to have Jerry Falwell fulminating about too much sex in society ? A. I don't care if he did do it, you can't. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 5, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by death tribble A. I don't care if he did do it, you can't. Q: Buuut mommmmy! Jimmy shot his little sister! A: A savage beating with a placid penguin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Q. What is Lemming's most secret nightmare ? A. Half a pound of tuppenny rice, half a pound of treacle, that's the way the money goes, Pop goes the weasel ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Worldmaker Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by death tribble A. Half a pound of tuppenny rice, half a pound of treacle, that's the way the money goes, Pop goes the weasel ! Q. What is George W. Bush's 2004 campaign slogan? A. First smiles and politeness. Then gunfire and blood. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Q. What are local elections in New York like ? A. Two pounds of cooking pat Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 5, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by death tribble A. Two pounds of cooking pat Q: What did this recepie call for that required you to butcher Chef Patrick like that? A: Squares and triangles, but no circles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Q. What did the superstar Euclidian Geometry Mathmetician ask for in their dressing room ? A. It was not honourable in the least, but it was effective Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
White Heat Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by death tribble A. It was not honourable in the least, but it was effective Q: Ow! Why did you steal my placid penguin and beat me with it? A: All right. Fine. If you say so. But for the record, those are hives, dammit, and I'm no longer responsible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 5, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Originally posted by White Heat A: All right. Fine. If you say so. But for the record, those are hives, dammit, and I'm no longer responsible. Q: Stop hitting me, you palcid penguin! I am quite sure that you are not allergic to being used as a blunt object against White Heat. Ok? A: Curly Joe strikes again Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted March 5, 2004 Report Share Posted March 5, 2004 Q: What happened to my curly fries!? A: A pot in every possum. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted March 6, 2004 Report Share Posted March 6, 2004 Q: What campaign slogan is sure to get you elected in HillBilly country? A: I don't know where THAT came from. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted March 6, 2004 Report Share Posted March 6, 2004 Originally posted by Tim Q: What campaign slogan is sure to get you elected in HillBilly country? A: I don't know where THAT came from. Q) So Tim, where'd you get the Foxbat Man-Thong? A) Its okay, I've got a license. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted March 6, 2004 Report Share Posted March 6, 2004 Originally posted by Enforcer84 Q) So Tim, where'd you get the Foxbat Man-Thong? A) Its okay, I've got a license. Q: Are you allowed to lift women's skirts and look at their underwear? A: It's you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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