Cancer Posted May 14 Report Share Posted May 14 On 5/12/2024 at 4:00 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: A: Any accurate statement about Orks is insulting. Q: What do you mean, Ork is best prepared by long slow braising, and as a winter stew it's both tasty and nutritious? A: Of course, they like it that way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted May 15 Report Share Posted May 15 18 hours ago, Cancer said: Q: What do you mean, Ork is best prepared by long slow braising, and as a winter stew it's both tasty and nutritious? A: Of course, they like it that way. Q: What do you mean when they prefer the Hansel and Gretel solution? A: That is the Fairy Tale Way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted May 15 Report Share Posted May 15 1 hour ago, Asperion said: A: That is the Fairy Tale Way. Q: Your legal system is based on horrifying consequences for even trivial offenses that we never tell the kids about? A: Bite that guy, not me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted May 19 Report Share Posted May 19 On 5/15/2024 at 9:02 AM, Pariah said: Q: Your legal system is based on horrifying consequences for even trivial offenses that we never tell the kids about? A: Bite that guy, not me. Q: What did Mina say when the Count caught her "in the act" with a college student half her age? A: I am a demolition worker. It is my job to turn buildings into vacant spaces where other buildings can be built in their place. I hope you will take that into account, Your Honor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted May 19 Report Share Posted May 19 2 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said: A: I am a demolition worker. It is my job to turn buildings into vacant spaces where other buildings can be built in their place. I hope you will take that into account, Your Honor. Q: YOU DYNAMITED THE HOUSES OF PARLIAMENT?!? A: I said, "Guy Fawkes." Got that? Fawkes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted May 20 Report Share Posted May 20 On 5/18/2024 at 10:56 PM, Cancer said: A: I said, "Guy Fawkes." Got that? Fawkes. Q: I got the movie you wanted but I didn't know -- are you really into porno? A: We don't talk about Pizza. No, No, No we don't talk about Pizza! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 17 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: I got the movie you wanted but I didn't know -- are you really into porno? A: We don't talk about Pizza. No, No, No we don't talk about Pizza! Q: For dinner, are we having Hawaiian, pepperoni, Chicago style? A: That interstate running through your planet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted May 21 Report Share Posted May 21 5 minutes ago, Asperion said: A: That interstate running through your planet. Q: Oh, what are the bloody Vogons on about this time? A: Justice may be blind, but the neighbors aren't. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted May 24 Report Share Posted May 24 On 5/21/2024 at 8:08 AM, Pariah said: Q: Oh, what are the bloody Vogons on about this time? A: Justice may be blind, but the neighbors aren't. Q: Now that the courts have found him innocent, what made everyone attack him on the way out? A: The fire is frozen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted May 30 Report Share Posted May 30 On 5/24/2024 at 7:24 AM, Asperion said: A: The fire is frozen. Q: Whatever your complaint against Disney, isn't organizing a public DVD burning a bit much? A: And that's why coffee is for grownups! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted June 2 Report Share Posted June 2 On 5/29/2024 at 8:46 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: Whatever your complaint against Disney, isn't organizing a public DVD burning a bit much? A: And that's why coffee is for grownups! Q: Are you really a three foot tall giant? A: That was made from inverse particles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted June 3 Report Share Posted June 3 12 hours ago, Asperion said: A: That was made from inverse particles. Q: [background singing: "It's Anti-Doody Time, it's Anti-Doody Time, it's Anti-Doody Time, ....] [Foreground announcer:] "Hello, boys and girls, do you know what time it is? That's, right, it's ... Anti-Doody Time! And here are our hosts, Anti-Doody and Unpeakable Swords!" A: There's highly charged debate about weak neutral currents. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 On 6/2/2024 at 9:00 PM, Cancer said: Q: [background singing: "It's Anti-Doody Time, it's Anti-Doody Time, it's Anti-Doody Time, ....] [Foreground announcer:] "Hello, boys and girls, do you know what time it is? That's, right, it's ... Anti-Doody Time! And here are our hosts, Anti-Doody and Unpeakable Swords!" A: There's highly charged debate about weak neutral currents. Q: How are we supposed to get anything from these neutrons? A: When I said longhorn, that was not what I meant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 12 minutes ago, Asperion said: A: When I said longhorn, that was not what I meant. Q: How's that alpenhorn sounding, Tex? A: Defeated by a pair of knaves. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted June 5 Report Share Posted June 5 4 hours ago, Pariah said: A: Defeated by a pair of knaves. Q: His hole cards included two jacks, to go with the two others he had showing? A: Slime! Semi-infinite quantities of slime! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted June 8 Report Share Posted June 8 On 6/5/2024 at 12:01 PM, Cancer said: Q: His hole cards included two jacks, to go with the two others he had showing? A: Slime! Semi-infinite quantities of slime! Q: What is Trump's planet made from? A: Just look into the clown car. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted June 8 Report Share Posted June 8 44 minutes ago, Asperion said: A: Just look into the clown car. Q: I'm sorry, but I don't believe you've constructed a functional tesseract. A: It's somewhere in the spectrum between gray and tan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted June 14 Report Share Posted June 14 On 6/8/2024 at 10:00 AM, Pariah said: Q: I'm sorry, but I don't believe you've constructed a functional tesseract. A: It's somewhere in the spectrum between gray and tan. Q: How would you define the trial of Hunter Biden? A: That coffee would wake up zombies. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted June 14 Report Share Posted June 14 4 hours ago, Asperion said: A: That coffee would wake up zombies. Q: Why aren't you drinking the coffee Herbert West brewed just for us? A: Serving the American people, with fries and a Coke! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted June 17 Report Share Posted June 17 On 6/14/2024 at 1:07 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: Why aren't you drinking the coffee Herbert West brewed just for us? A: Serving the American people, with fries and a Coke! Q: Have you heard about the wild trip people get from McDonald's? A: That is a face only a devil could love. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted June 22 Report Share Posted June 22 On 6/17/2024 at 7:17 AM, Asperion said: A: That is a face only a devil could love. Q: Don't you understand? I'm a Succubus! A servant of the darkest powers! Did you expect me to be beautiful and charming? A: Man, you sure picked the wrong day to summon the souls of your dead parents! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted June 26 Report Share Posted June 26 On 6/21/2024 at 10:09 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: Don't you understand? I'm a Succubus! A servant of the darkest powers! Did you expect me to be beautiful and charming? A: Man, you sure picked the wrong day to summon the souls of your dead parents! Q: What were you thinking choosing Beltane for this all important ritual? A: We cannot let the truth get in the way of the news. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted June 28 Report Share Posted June 28 On 6/26/2024 at 6:59 AM, Asperion said: A: We cannot let the truth get in the way of the news. Q: You know they're corrupt; why do you watch TV news? A: Donkey Kong pr0n. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted June 30 Report Share Posted June 30 On 6/27/2024 at 7:08 PM, Cancer said: Q: You know they're corrupt; why do you watch TV news? A: Donkey Kong pr0n. Q: What is this presentation titled "Candy Kong Adventures"? A: History is your master. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted June 30 Report Share Posted June 30 2 hours ago, Asperion said: A: History is your master. Q: After getting my bachelor's degree in archeology, can you guess what I did next? A: I'm not aware of any scientific instrument that measures for that. There really ought to be one, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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