Cygnia Posted October 18, 2016 Report Share Posted October 18, 2016 I can't peel carrots with kittens around. This isn't a bug; it's a feature. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 18, 2016 Report Share Posted October 18, 2016 Why is there blood in my mouth? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 Red skies at morning, sailors take warning. Red skies at night, sailors delight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 23, 2016 Report Share Posted October 23, 2016 Deploy the bird feeders! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnia Posted October 24, 2016 Report Share Posted October 24, 2016 The world does NOT need pumpkin spice olives! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted October 28, 2016 Author Report Share Posted October 28, 2016 I have no idea where my cat pees. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 28, 2016 Report Share Posted October 28, 2016 Text from tonight's soccer match in rainy Seattle: Didn't bring a rain jacket. New plan: drink until I'm not wet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted October 31, 2016 Report Share Posted October 31, 2016 I am tired and stressed out. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 31, 2016 Report Share Posted October 31, 2016 From eighty-four hundred yards ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cassandra Posted October 31, 2016 Report Share Posted October 31, 2016 Give then an inch, they'll take a foot, and pretty soon you won't have a leg to stand on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 31, 2016 Report Share Posted October 31, 2016 ... doesn't score a goal all year, and he has two in three days. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted November 1, 2016 Report Share Posted November 1, 2016 To absent friends: Francois, Patrizia, Pierre, Julia, Gunvald, Theo. Don't shed a tear for them. They're fictional characters. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 2, 2016 Report Share Posted November 2, 2016 What good is carrying a cell phone when you never answer the d***ed thing? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted November 2, 2016 Report Share Posted November 2, 2016 The problem with serial killers is that they never start with themselves. Burrito Boy, aylwin13, Cygnia and 1 other 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted November 3, 2016 Author Report Share Posted November 3, 2016 Something smells terrible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 3, 2016 Report Share Posted November 3, 2016 You have red and blue reversed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted November 3, 2016 Author Report Share Posted November 3, 2016 I wonder if the Russian part has any typos. Oh well. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 7, 2016 Report Share Posted November 7, 2016 Also, missing the fact that Rutherford was quoting the King James Version of Matthew 6:24 seems unconscionable even to a heathen like me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 7, 2016 Report Share Posted November 7, 2016 look at that critter gRoadkill Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnia Posted November 8, 2016 Report Share Posted November 8, 2016 There's something endearing waking up to SRV's "Pride & Joy" with a kitten purring at your elbow... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted November 10, 2016 Report Share Posted November 10, 2016 Adjusting to my new life as an atheist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 14, 2016 Report Share Posted November 14, 2016 * spits * Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cygnia Posted November 14, 2016 Report Share Posted November 14, 2016 Lateral soft tissue edema Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 15, 2016 Report Share Posted November 15, 2016 Teaser line on magazine: More than gray: 50 SHADES OF PENGUIN ... going too far Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 15, 2016 Report Share Posted November 15, 2016 "Shone" is rot13 for FUBAR. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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