Gnaskar

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... As only one player showed up for dark heresy, and he brought a friend, we decided to try hero system in practice (after both of us having tried to recruit players for half a year). We ended up playing a very silly dark champions like thing. The players are chasing a group from CLOWN through the sewers to save some DNPCs. the players: lolz-cat: once a normal house cat, until he was bitten by a normal house cat. Pie-Rat: A rat-man pirate who has a pun-triggered pie attack. Hates clowns. Mime (GMPC): a duplicating mime with force wall powers (gestures limitation). Some notes from character sheets: Lolz-cat: Animal handler, I handle myself well. ... Lolz-cat: TF: Backpack comment on an insane summer (the rest of the normal party was at the beach): GM: Lets go to the sauna and cool down The dice fall of the table (fifth time): GM: Hit location: floor First time with segments: Pie-rat: now the post-12s, right? GM: We're not in segment 12 yet... *checks notes* ...now we're in segment 12 Lacking models, we used dice: Pie-rat: hey, you just rolled me! (the clown bull rushed him) Ultimatum: Clown boss: surrender or your friends will be pied.. eh, died.. crap, I mean killed. Half a second later, blinded by a pie, he toke a 3d6+1 AP rapier to location 13, doing 17 damage. I mentioned that that pie-rat hates clowns...

Re: WWYCD: The Jack-In-The-Box Scenario Mechano: would study the box and try to figure out what it does. Giant man: (with absorbsion going to growth) would jump of buildings until he was big enough to hold it shut.

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER The second highest inflation in the world is at around 50% compare that to Zimbabwe's 2 200 000 000 % and laugh, or cry, or wake up.

Re: Post A Crime With Game Potential Zimbabwe, and its leadership. That's certainly the work of Nama, the giant snake that "caused" VIPER. Or VIPER itself, perhaps. Or maybe Warlord.

Re: Norse Warrior Don't worry little brother...there are more.

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Quotes from a standard dnd campaign I play in. First the characters: Arkai: Technically a rogue; heavy munchkin with 4 classes at level 8 total, a diplomatic face man and moderating factor in the party; human. Sam (me): Elf druid archer who rides to battle on a giant bat (called Batbat); chaotic neutral, and happy to do anything she considers fun; hates dwarves and has slight superiority complex; favorite combat tactic is dropping one enemy on another from 50ft up. Durin: dwarf cleric; famous for not paying attention; Sam’s constant rival. Kip: Ten year old centaur with no class, going barbarian eventually; party tank, and trolley; carried a boat around at some point; currently carrying a dead paladin skeleton we found. Batbat: my pet bat, has cloak and boots of elvenkind, and acts like a stealth bomber. From a conversation with an undead warrior whose crypt we’re desecrating: Arkai: What's a rotting corpse like you doing in a crypt like this? … Sam: Nice crypt, by the way. … Sam: That would explain... absolutely nothing. GM (as the undead warrior): The faithful dog barked in the night to save their masters from the [cute little things]. It was scorned for waking them. When the dog stopped barking the beasts killed the grown ups and kidnapped the children to an unknown fate. Sam: We need a dog. The effect of discovering that the unique little creatures are evil: Arkai: I think the woman in the church knows more than she says… Sam: I think her pet [one of the little evil things] knows more than it says. Durin (confused): It didn't say anything. Sam: Exactly. (we proved it wasn't an animal when my Speak With Animals didn't let me talk to it) We go talking to the woman in the church: Arkai: A time back there was a paladin in town, of Pelor... Kip: He looks a lot like this rotten corpse (holds up headless corpse). Out of context, but in character: Sam: We are the heroes of this story! Pre-session announcement: GM: Although Kip is quitting you keep using him as you normally do. Arkai: You mean the sort of things Sam likes to do? Sam: Hey, that was only once, and I was insane at the time. Sam, an with STR 8 was played by Kip's girlfriend one session, and she tried to rape him (He has STR 28). The session begins: GM: so what were you doing? Arkai: Sam was screaming something diplomatic in elvish, to try to stop the elves from shooting us. Sam: Wait … Sam, diplomatic? You dictate. We decide to go looking for the elves in a forest. Arkai: I can guess what will happen to us. Sam: Pincushion. Durin: I could use Augury to check when they plan to shoot at us so we can duck… Arkai: Augury doesn't do that, it just tells us if it is a good idea to enter the forest or not. GM: and that you already know. We find a burnt tree: Arkai: I roll an intuition check. GM (interpreted as a wisdom check; 5 total): You think it burnt down. Sam: I roll knowledge nature GM (6 total):You think it burnt down. Durin: I roll Wisdom GM (crit fail): You think there was a flood. Durin is the only one to succeeds a search check: Durin: I explain how this proves there was a flood The end of an OOC discussion about Handle Animal: Sam: Durin, Roll round. Durin: *distracted* I roll round ... wait, what? Sam: see, I'm good at making animals do things. Another OOC discussion: Sam: I want to become a werewolf. Arkai: You're an elf, you can't become a werewolf. Sam: I can't?! Why... Arkai: Elves can only become wererabbits. Durin is not hurt by a poison thorn trap: Sam (deadpan): The elves tried to poison an armored dwarf healer with a thorny bush? I fear for the future of my race. The party finds a burnt hut: Arkai: I roll wisdom. GM: (5 total) You think it burnt down. Sam OOC (already back in town): Durin, roll Wisdom again. Durin: I roll Wisdom. (crit pass) Durin: Ha! GM: You think it was set fire to by someone ... and you guess what happened earlier was a fire, too. Sam and Arkai: Ha! Best out of context: Arkai: Can I sleep nailed to the ceiling? GM: Only with masterwork nails. An NPC fighter with us gets shoot a lot: GM: She seems to proud ask for healing but hints at it. Durin, do you get the hint? Sam: Durin’s a dwarf, he wouldn't get a hint if it danced nude in front of him Durin: *distracted* Huh? Nude who? Sam: See? Durin is finally roused from his forum reading: Sam: Durin, Medic! Durin: Who needs healing? Sam: The thing with two arrows in it. Durin: I pull out the arrows from the thing and tell it to stop complaining. Is it healed now? GM: She now has two holes in her. Durin: I fill them with sawdust. We think there’s an elf nearby: Arkai: Sam, get Batbat to use blindsense. Sam: I do so. GM: He makes some weird movements. Sam: Does he point? GM: He points. Sam: With what? (It’s an ongoing joke that Batbat has far too many limbs) Arkai: You don't want to know, He male, isn't he? Batbat’s current limb count: Two legs, two clawed hands, two clawed wings, monkey tail, birdlike tail, beak, mouth with teeth, two big ears, and the new addition from Arkai From another semi OOC discussion regarding the fact that every villain in the campaign has had a mustache: Arkai: But elves can't be evil ... no facial hair. ... Durin: It could be a genetic mutation… Arkai: If it was one or two yes, but a whole village, I don’t think so. … Arkai: Wait, I know, they must be were-wolf-elves! Sam: You mean were-rabbits, right?

Re: Concepts Killed by 350 Chuck Norris, as per the jokes roundhouse kick: HKA 20d6; NND (defense is being Chuck Norris) +1; Does BODY +1; 0 END cost +1/2; 1050 active points; Only When It Furthers The Badly Written Plot -1/4; Restrainable (by grabs and entangles) -1/2; 600 points.

Re: Champions Babies Mechano, if unaffected would get JACK, his personal AI, to watch over them while he tries to fix it. If effected, Mechano would sit and do math, or build robot toys.

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... from a dark heresy (warhammer 40000) campaign: the group had snuck into the temple of an evil Nurgle (god of decease) cult, and was watching the cult preforming some sort of ritual through a key hole. The cult leader is in the front of the room chanting out of the book the group was tasked with finding. Sniper: I could shoot him through the key hole... *Out of character discussion about the odds* turns out that if he aims through the key hole and the rest of the group opens the door and storms in, he has a 91% chance of hitting. the sniper sets up, using a chair to brace, aims, and everyone says the Litany of Accuracy together: Grant me the sight of the eagle, the calm of the breeze, the patience of a saint, and the skill to smite my foe from afar. the sniper rolls: 97... weapon jams sniper: FATE POINT!!! re-rolls: 12, damage: max + crit + crit again + nearly crit = massive The cult leader is headless. the assassin runs forward to grab the book, just in time for the ritual to finish, and a daemon host (read: demi-god in a human host) to form right in front of him. the assassin goes insane from the sight

Re: Genres HERO GAMES may want to avoid (intended to be humorous) 68 pages of things ending with HERO table HERO Garden HERO Factory Worker HERO Airplane HERO High School Application HERO veteran HERO (age limitation at maximun, as a ground rule) Mighty Mutant Farting HERO (H)uman (E)ducational ®elativity (O)rganization Essay HERO