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Play on words magic items/spells


Supreme Serpent

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I love puns and plays on words. I loved the old D&D stuff they tossed in, like the material component for ESP being a copper piece ("penny for your thoughts").

 

Along those lines, any magic items/spells you folks have that are plays on words?

 

Like:

 

Stick of Butter - small wooden rod that when tapped on a surface coats it in a thin layer of butter. Can only do a small item/surface (about a foot square, a pan, etc.).

 

Mace of Spraying - once a day, can emit a choking, blinding cloud to incapacitate foes.

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

You realise that you're only a small step away from Tunnels & Trolls here, don't you? :D

 

I mention that as someone who has long enjoyed T&T and also has an occasional super-hero magician called Punslinger whose spells all followed this sort of logic. For example:

 

A Mere Trifle: Turns a body of water into a jelly and custard dessert with whipped cream topping.

 

One Good Tern: Forcefully changes a seagull into a Good creature that will no longer try to steal your chips.

 

Needless to say, he's not the most successful magician out there...

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

I've come up with several (which should surprise nobody).

 

My personal favorite (applicable to a form of Fantasy Hero) is a man's hairpiece that, after being worn for a given period of time by its intended target, bursts into flame, setting the target on fire until he's dead.

 

It's called a Hell Toupee.

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

I've not built any as such but off the top of my head.

 

Glad Rags. A suit of battered clothes that induces near insane amounts of joy in the wearer.

 

Stake of Roasting. If you stab a vampire with this but miss the heart then don't worry! It'll burst into flames and you can run away while he's distracted by burning to death!

 

Clue Bat. A mysterious bat shaped amulet that speaks words of cosmic wisdom when its guardian spirit is propitiated with pizza.

 

Thinking Cap. Hat that increases intelligence.

 

Humble Pie. Laced with Ego Draining poison!

 

Death Defying Plunger. It cleans drains, grants luck and has an inbuilt +2d6 Deadly Blow against Reapers.

 

So easy but can't resist. The Ring of Truth. Brings agony to the wearer if they speak falsehoods.

 

And a few spells from the 'nagging' sphere of magic.

 

"Get Down off Your High Horse!" Suppress, Only works against Flight. +2d6 against beings with animal intelligence.

 

"Some People Are No Better Than They Should Be!" Drain, Only works against characteristics or powers that have been increased by other powers such as Aid.

 

"You're So Sharp You'll Cut Yourself One Day!" RKA. Must follow a hostile action made by opponent. SFX = Opponent is wounded by their own weapon.

 

"Oops! Butterfingers." A Transform. Not very pleasant when you think about it.

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

"You'll shoot your eye out!" - a spell that allows one to project one's eye across distances to see.

 

Meat stick - a club made from petrified muscle.

 

ASSUME - transforms one other person and yourself into a donkey.

 

I think I'm going to need to make a very powerful magic item that is made out of a raw skinless petrified leg of lamb...

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

Join the Club.

 

A formidable looking wood club, decorated all over with carved faces mostly expressing pain or fear.

 

A Normal Attack linked to Extradimensional Movement Usable As Attack (Victim becomes part of the club, just another face in the crowd.)

 

To summon a victim back (expel them from the club) one must know the name of the being the club absorbed, and strike the club with a sphere of ebony, jet, or a similar substance.

 

Lucius Alexander

 

The palindromedary sings a verse from "The Mouse Trainer's Child"

(To the tune of "Horsetamer's Daughter")

"She said this one mouse had a club, and it was mighty big,

But I just laughed, 'cause grandma's daft, and a mouse club would be a twig.

At most a mouse could weild a stick the size of a pencil stub;

Such a little arm could do little harm - I called it a Mickey Mouse Club."

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

I like the club. :P

 

This one is accidentally from my wife. She said I should include Sea Monkeys in an adventure, and I heard "Seed Monkeys".

 

Seed Monkeys - enchanted coins that when planted in the ground spring up and transform into monkeys, like the dragon teeth from Jason & the Argonauts, but with monkeys.

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

The Club of the Month Book.

 

The first time this small book is opened, the peruser will find several pages illustrated with pictures of clubs; the facing pages describe the club and its powers. Each illustration page also includes a space for a signature, sigil, impression of a seal ring, or other mark. The character must mark one page, and only one; marking others will have no effect. The selected club will then appear.

 

This club will exist for one month; at that time it will transform into a different club. If it is broken, dispelled, or otherwise lost during that time, it will be replaced at the end of the month and not sooner. With every club, a minor Side Effect activates, and some portion of the character's money (or other portable wealth) vanishes. This may be a set amount, vary according to the power of that month's club, etc.

 

Possession of the book (and club) will pass to whoever was last to sign or mark it.

 

Samples:

 

Babysitter's Club.

This club is built with a STUN Drain with the recovery time bought down. A tap from it will put someone to sleep for hours, but it is safe to use even on infants.

 

Breakfast Club.

Combines a modest attack with Life Support (creates food once a day, within an hour of the character waking up.)

 

Lucius Alexander

 

And the Palindromedary Fan Club.

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

I love puns and plays on words. I loved the old D&D stuff they tossed in, like the material component for ESP being a copper piece ("penny for your thoughts").

 

Along those lines, any magic items/spells you folks have that are plays on words?

 

Like:

 

Stick of Butter - small wooden rod that when tapped on a surface coats it in a thin layer of butter. Can only do a small item/surface (about a foot square, a pan, etc.).

 

Mace of Spraying - once a day, can emit a choking, blinding cloud to incapacitate foes.

 

You should really check out Kingdom of Loathing sometime.

 

it's almost entirely populated by bad puns and obscure references.

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

Walking Stick - 0 END on 3" Run (3 Active Points, 1 Real Point) Allows the user to walk at 4 MPH for hours at a time and not feel the least bit tired.

 

Shopping Maul - The maul give the owner +3 on Trading (or basic 11 or less) if carried, but slowly gives him or her a pathological need to stop at towns to shop for bargains.

 

Boots of Giantkind - When worn, the wearer's feet expand until they fit these giant-sized boots. However they do give a nice +4D6 HA to one's kick and +2 resistance to KB. "Those are some mighty big boots, you got there."

 

Ten of Clubs - When using this club, nine other clubs appear and attempt to hit the opponent. Although, at most, three will hit the target successfully.

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

Walking Stick - 0 END on 3" Run (3 Active Points, 1 Real Point) Allows the user to walk at 4 MPH for hours at a time and not feel the least bit tired.

 

Shopping Maul - The maul give the owner +3 on Trading (or basic 11 or less) if carried, but slowly gives him or her a pathological need to stop at towns to shop for bargains.

 

Boots of Giantkind - When worn, the wearer's feet expand until they fit these giant-sized boots. However they do give a nice +4D6 HA to one's kick and +2 resistance to KB. "Those are some mighty big boots, you got there."

 

Ten of Clubs - When using this club, nine other clubs appear and attempt to hit the opponent. Although, at most, three will hit the target successfully.

 

One enterprising mage combined the powers of the Boots of Giantkind with the Walking Stick. Or rather - Boots That Are Made For Walking, (Which Are Gonna Walk All Over You).

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

The Lepricon Ree designed these time-traveling boots:

 

The Ree Boots

 

By walking backwards, the wearer of these boots can force time itself to reset to a previous phase and start over.

 

Lucius Alexander

 

The palindromedary tries to explain that there is no backwards in time - only forwards in the other direction.

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

Sphere of Blogos - Appearance is similar to a normal crystal ball, with spider-web like patterns across the entire surface. Contains the spirts of several deceased sages. Can be asked about a subject once a day, and one of the spirits will reply. They are proud, and cranky, so will provide an answer even if they don't know the correct one.

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Re: Play on words magic items/spells

 

Peers At Ennui

 

This covers a site, item, being, or thread with an enchantment that causes anyone who peers at the subject of the spell to experience it as hopelessly dull and uninteresting. It may be targetted to only effect certain classes of peerers, such as "anyone who is planning to write a bad Xanth novel" or even a specific named individual, such as a certain popular fantasy author.

 

Lucius Alexander

 

Hastily casting such an enchantment on the palindromedary

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