death tribble Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Q. So what is the one thing that qualifies you as head of the European Union ? A. I have a lovely terrorist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 A: I've got a lovely terrorist. Q: We need something edgey, yet nice. What do you have? A: Cheeseburger! Cheeseburger! Cheeseburger! Cheeseburger! Cheeseburger! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 19, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by lemming A: Cheeseburger! Cheeseburger! Cheeseburger! Cheeseburger! Cheeseburger! Q: So what are the five kinds of burgers you serve here, again? A: I honestly thought that it would solve the problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Q. The senator was guilty of treason so you gave him a ran the world air ticket and a five minute head start. Why exactly ? A. OH MY LORD, NORWEGIANS ! NORWEGIANS ! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES ! IT'S THE NORWEGIANS ! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 19, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by death tribble A. OH MY LORD, NORWEGIANS ! NORWEGIANS ! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES ! IT'S THE NORWEGIANS ! Q: What did English villiagers actually say with genuine fear in their voices in 990 A.D.? A: Let slip the dogs of heated arguments Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Q. What Shakespearean paraphrase did a Congressman think would be pretty neat as Congress were debating whether they should get a pay rise ? A. And now I am the President I do not have to wear a pink tafata ballet dress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Worldmaker Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by death tribble A. And now I am the President I do not have to wear a pink tafata ballet dress. Q. Assume for a moment Joe Liebermann actually made it to the oval office. What do you think his first words upon sitting down at the president's desk for the first time would have been? A. It goes without saying that, no matter what else, its not supposed to be pink. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 19, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by Worldmaker A. It goes without saying that, no matter what else, its not supposed to be pink. Q: What do you think of this rough-sketch for the "new and improved" Grond? A: So, I gave him the bird. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Worldmaker Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by Klytus Q: What do you think of this rough-sketch for the "new and improved" Grond? A: So, I gave him the bird. Q. So... what happened with that guy who kept screaming "HAND OVER THE PARROT!" and pointing the gun at you? A. Read by James Earl Jones, with an introduction by Kathy Ireland. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocMan Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by Worldmaker A. Read by James Earl Jones, with an introduction by Kathy Ireland. Q: The audio book version of "Dummies guide to Cheerleading"? A: It's glued to my hand. Doc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by DocMan A: It's glued to my hand. Q: So this key to the car isn't going to be lost like the others is it? A: 867-5309 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocMan Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by lemming A: 867-5309 Q: What's Jenny's phone number again? A: Some idiot tried to cut of my hand to get my car keys! Doc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by DocMan A: Some idiot tried to cut of my hand to get my car keys! Q: Geez Doc. What are so worked up about? A: Mmmmmmm, Goverment Cheese Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocMan Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by lemming A: Mmmmmmm, Goverment Cheese Q: What's the quickest way to end constipation? A: I think we need a bigger bandage. Doc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Worldmaker Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by DocMan A: I think we need a bigger bandage. Q. What do we need to stop the bleeding from DocMan's severed wrist? A. There is is again! Could you get someone in here to fix this thing? The last thing we need is a radiation leak! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 20, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Originally posted by Worldmaker A. There is is again! Could you get someone in here to fix this thing? The last thing we need is a radiation leak! Q: Oh look! Sparks comming from the microwave. A: I was doing fine until I saw he was wearing a polkadot bikini. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hermit Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Originally posted by Klytus Q: Oh look! Sparks comming from the microwave. A: I was doing fine until I saw he was wearing a polkadot bikini. Q: So, what did you think of the portrayal of the Punisher in the prescreening of his new movie? A: But the Dish was just playin' the spoon the whole time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Worldmaker Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Originally posted by Hermit A: But the Dish was just playin' the spoon the whole time. Q. What's the silliest euphamism for fellatio you've ever heard? A. Ah, that Barney Rubble... what an actor! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Javed Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Originally posted by Worldmaker Q. What's the silliest euphamism for fellatio you've ever heard? A. Ah, that Barney Rubble... what an actor! Q. You shot the TV because they said what at the Oscars? A. No matter how thin you slice it, it's still baloney. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hermit Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Q: So, how do you feel about politics today? A: Oh no, I have bigger plans than that. MUCH bigger plans. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Originally posted by Hermit A: Oh no, I have bigger plans than that. MUCH bigger plans. Q: So how's your full scale model of the Great Wall coming along? A: Burnt Toast with a side of very crisp bacon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Originally posted by lemming A: Burnt Toast with a side of very crisp bacon Q: What do you get when Rachel cooks breakfast, after putting the fire out? A: Salmonella, botulism and cramps! Oh, my! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Q: What do you get after eating the breakfast cooked by Rachel? A: The Thriller in Vanilla Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Originally posted by Tim Q: What do you get after eating the breakfast cooked by Rachel? lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Originally posted by Tim A: The Thriller in Vanilla Q: What are they calling that wrestling match in a vat of pudding between Britney and Christina? A: I really need some sleep. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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