Michael Hopcroft Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 A: This planet is fully dehydrated. Q: Where did all these enormous, toothy worms come from? A: Not only does the Spice let me see the future and fold space and time, but it also happens to go great in pasta sauce! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 A: Not only does the Spice let me see the future and fold space and time, but it also happens to go great in pasta sauce! Q: What's your super-shtick, Spice Ghost? A: I really wish I didn't know that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 24, 2014 Report Share Posted March 24, 2014 A: I really wish I didn't know that. Q: You realize that there's a blind, gibbering, omnipotent idiot at the center of the Universe that's always surrounded by cacophonous flute-playing, right? A: And that takes care of the obligatory Cthulhu reference for the day. We can move on now to the core of our discussion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueCloud2k2 Posted March 25, 2014 Report Share Posted March 25, 2014 Q: Okay, which one of you screw-heads said Cthulu three times in a row? 'cause he's out in the hall way and he looks PISSED! A: The only way that movie could be anymore awesome was if 2Cellos and Lindsey Stirling did the soundtrack. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 28, 2014 Report Share Posted March 28, 2014 A: The only way that movie could be anymore awesome was if 2Cellos and Lindsey Stirling did the soundtrack. Q: You know, I never thought a "Glee" opera movie would work, but it does, don't you think? A: In these stories, we want to know "Will They or Won't They?", but with us I know the answer -- we won't! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 28, 2014 Report Share Posted March 28, 2014 A: In these stories, we want to know "Will They or Won't They?", but with us I know the answer -- we won't! Q - So, are you and Jewel Staite going to make that Firefly fanfic movie you wrote? A - I haven't actually seen him, but I understand that he's quite impressive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 28, 2014 Report Share Posted March 28, 2014 A - I haven't actually seen him, but I understand that he's quite impressive. Q: So you want to go to Professor Griffin's lecture. You do realize he's invisible, don't you? A: Our dog is smarter than you, you know. And he's a pretty stupid dog. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueCloud2k2 Posted March 28, 2014 Report Share Posted March 28, 2014 Q: You enrolled Rover in Yale? How'd you pull that off? A: All it cost me was two boxes of nails, a roll of duct-tape and a coconut. Not sure what he wanted the coconut for, though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 28, 2014 Report Share Posted March 28, 2014 A: All it cost me was two boxes of nails, a roll of duct-tape and a coconut. Not sure what he wanted the coconut for, though. Q: Nice new hat, little buddy! Get it from the Professor? A: Not every football has a heart of gold. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted March 28, 2014 Report Share Posted March 28, 2014 A: Not every football has a heart of gold. Q: I cannot get this football to fly right. Is there any reason for this problem? A: We are playing Hide & Seek with bonus points for creative death. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 30, 2014 Report Share Posted March 30, 2014 A: We are playing Hide & Seek with bonus points for creative death. Q: You're saying the recess lady is out of her mind? Why? A: You must really be out of your mind if you want to go to work for this company! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueCloud2k2 Posted March 30, 2014 Report Share Posted March 30, 2014 Q: And you have a problem with me working for Evil, Inc why, exactly? A: Nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 30, 2014 Report Share Posted March 30, 2014 A: Nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure. Q - How can we get the State Legislature to stop passing such stupid laws? A - No, I'm afraid that's not legal here, either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted March 30, 2014 Report Share Posted March 30, 2014 A - No, I'm afraid that's not legal here, either. Q: Can I vote for none of the above? A: Blue guys frying all the brains. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted March 30, 2014 Report Share Posted March 30, 2014 A: Blue guys frying all the brains. Q: What is the perfect definition of government? A: That is the perfect time to divide by zero. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 30, 2014 Report Share Posted March 30, 2014 A: That is the perfect time to divide by zero. Q: So the only way to stop Galactus is to make the Universe implode? How do we do that? A: Program completed. Computer destroyed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueCloud2k2 Posted March 31, 2014 Report Share Posted March 31, 2014 Q: You said you've been hit with Cryptolocker? Why don't you retaliate with KAK-Worm? A: Mmm.... bacon... *drools* Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 31, 2014 Report Share Posted March 31, 2014 A: Mmm.... bacon... *drools* Q: What are the most frightening words you can hear from Porky Pig? A: They're just jealous, 'cause I've seen The Desolation of Smaug twenty-seven times this week! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueCloud2k2 Posted March 31, 2014 Report Share Posted March 31, 2014 Q: Why are there a hundred people dressed as Lord of the Rings characters chasing you with pitchforks and torches? A: The force is weak with that one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted March 31, 2014 Report Share Posted March 31, 2014 A: The force is weak with that one. Q: Why is Skywalker cowering in the corner like that? A: He is the King of DoubleSpeek. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 31, 2014 Report Share Posted March 31, 2014 A: He is the King of DoubleSpeek. Q: What makes O'Brien such a successful member of the Inner Party? A: Let's see you blame this mess on the cat! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueCloud2k2 Posted April 1, 2014 Report Share Posted April 1, 2014 Q: Why are there empty beer bottles all over the house? A: I'm gonna hafta plead the fifth on that topic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted April 1, 2014 Report Share Posted April 1, 2014 A: I'm gonna hafta plead the fifth on that topic. Q - How much vodka did you drink last night, anyway? A - I have to keep remembering that I chose this. BlueCloud2k2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlueCloud2k2 Posted April 1, 2014 Report Share Posted April 1, 2014 Q: Aren't you sick of being a middle-school teacher yet? A: In times like these, I ask myself, "What would Han Solo do?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted April 1, 2014 Report Share Posted April 1, 2014 A: In times like these, I ask myself, "What would Han Solo do?" Q: Shoot first, or not shoot first? A: Like the Spaniards at Manila Bay. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.