Marcus Impudite

Recently I was building a character and opened FRED for the handcuffs write-up in the side bar on page 109 when something occured to me that I hadn't thought about prior: the "Can Be Escaped Automatically With A Modified Lockpicking Or Contortionist Roll (-1/2)" limitation. Are those modifiers positive or negative? I can't really speak for the contortionist part of this, but- according to a friend of mine who's a locksmith- handcuffs are barnone the easiest locks to pick. And I didn't just have to take his word for it, I've actually seen him open a pair of cuffs instantly with nothing but one of those little precision screwdrivers. Thoughts?

Q: Both knees? Gee Tim, how did this happen? () A: The so-called good guys on that show were such twits I actually found myself rooting for the villains to kick their lily asses.

After a grueling battle, you (and your teammates, if you have them) have defeated and mortally injured a demon-motif villain (use whoever fits in your campaign). Just before he expired, the baddy says the following: "Celibrate your victory while you can fool(s), the seed of my rebirth has already taken root." He then cackles a last maniacal laugh, his eyes unfocus and roll back in his head, and he collapses limp as a ragdoll as his spirit abbandons his lifeless body. Sometime later, you somehow find out that a young woman known to have had -ahem- "intimate contact" with the aforementioned villain is pregnant. How would your character react?

If the above is any indication, this junior team member isn't very smart. So after I stop them from (presumably) getting us all killed, I'll ask the team leader why he/she insists on bring the little idiot with us on important missions.

Q: So, is $1,000,000 enough? A: "I love the smell of naplam in the morning, it smells like... barbaque."

In Fred, p. 310, it says: "Automations can have a number of simple commands, or programs, equal to its INT." So, does mean they can buy programs at 1 point each to be "user friendly" like a computer or AI, or is that unnecessary?

Devilfire: (Demon Half) Decide if any of the essorteric items would be worth the money and order. (Human Half) Continue surfing and see if there are any Baywatch reruns on.

May be disturbing to SOME?!! Dude, I had to run to the men's room and puke after reading the opening post and I'm a freak'n demon for crying out loud.

ROFLMDAO (Rolling On Floor Laughing My Demonic Ass Off)

Devilfire: (Demon Half) Seize total control of Greg's body, grab Rhea so he doesn't have to listen to Greg's bitching later, and stow away aboard the aliens' ship. (Human Half) Won't know what happened until he gets control back and finds himself and his girl aboard the ship

Devilfire: (Demon Half) So, the legends are true... (Human Half) "What? Am I in a bad episode of Highlander?"

Devilfire: (Demon Half) Snicker at this poser who calls herself a succubus. (Human Half) Would go about his business since the matter is pretty much resolved as it is.

For me: Read my sig. Just bring her to my place in something skimpy with a ribbon and bow on her head and it's all good.

Devilfire: (Demon Half) Would at first be tempted to rat him out just for the sake of screwing him over, but then decide to instead ask him where he can get a tracker implant for Rhea. If that whiny human he's sharing a body with insists on protecting that little powder puff, it wouldn't hurt to make the job alittle easier. (Human Half) "Fine. I'll keep your secret, but you owe me BIG TIME for dropping a bombshell like this on me."

Hell, even Seeker would have taken Frasier down in one phase... just before getting knocked out himself.

Q: What did the buzzard say as it circled over that sick hiker? A: Don't be so glumb my dear, you'll grow accustomed to me in time. You'll even come to call my Palace Of Eternal Darkness home.

Q) So what does ol' Saint Nick do the rest of the year? A) I'll have a Roman Coke please.

Devilfire: Grab some popcorn, sit back, and watch the show. DF will only intervene if it looks like Villain A is going to win the fight.

Devilfire: Call in a favor to the old gypsy woman to get Rhea cured of the lycanthropy, then go on a serious search and destroy through the supernatural underworld for the dirty hair ball that infected her.

How about a mini-senerio where the PCs get to hunt down and brutally slaughter the wankers who produced Average Joe along with that trio of vacuous pretty boys they brought in during the last episodes.

Q. What the hell is DT doing with that Teletubby? A. At last, a woman has replied to my personal Ad...

If Toymaker is asking for superpowered backup to go after Artemis, I'll assume he armed her with some MAJOR firepower and plan accordingly.

Looks okay to me. Just don't get arrested for indecent exposure.

Q: How can you be that surprised that Carrot Top got elected president by a write in campaign? A: That'll be $25,000,000 plus shipping and handling charges.

Don't forget to link an HA to it. 2d6 should be good stick. 4d6 or more if you want to make it really hurt