Pariah

15 hours ago, Cancer said:

Death Tribble thinks the New Model Army is all those women in short black dresses behind Robert Palmer in the Addicted to Love video.

Where does one enlist? 

Asking for a friend.

I'm quite certain I have no idea what you're talking about.

Show us the merchandise or you'll lose another head, Jeebs.

Gratuity

'Fword' or 'Fnord'?

On 1/15/2018 at 10:01 AM, Hermit said:

Now not available: Magneto, Captain America Steve Rogers, and Superman/Clark Kent

And I've drafted all three of them. That's hilarious.

Water 

Tuba 

I usually just use [REDACTED], with a nod to Heinlein and other writers of that generation.

Playing room monitor while someone else administers the ASVAB is not as exciting as, say, watching bread dough rise. But at least I got those labs graded!

1 minute ago, Cancer said:

A: The term "ship" here does not mean "write them in a romantic story together".

Q: You want me to ship the President and Killer Frost together?

A: Look at how prettily that bridge burns! 

5 minutes ago, death tribble said:

Point of order.

Drawing the card. How do you know that we are telling the truth when we say what card we draw ?

Someone could for example be a Motorhead fan and claim they drew the Ace of Spades.

Ahem....

Quote

The Honor System Card pick factor-  This  pick is not under your control (or shouldn't be), and it's not under my control either. You pick a single card from a typical deck, and depending on what suit you get, you must adjust your story. This only happens one and you're on the honor system. I mean, you could lie, but you're only cheating yourself blah blah and I think we're a pretty good bunch. You must have at least three protagonists, your General, and your dragon picked before you have your card draw day.

Short answer: Self-policing.

(And seriously, how many fans of Motörhead could there be out there, anyway?)

6 minutes ago, Michael Hopcroft said:

A: Nothing has ever happened before. Nothing.

Q: So, you and the Duchess of Eastern Slobovia have a complicated history, no?

A: Penguin and Sheepdog.

Pentagon 

1 hour ago, Logan.1179 said:

Wow, I got sniped!

Or maybe just foreshadowed. 

Being in the same room with it was a little disconcerting, Victor thought. He knew there was no reason for him to be concerned. This being had saved the world a dozen times over, often sacrificing its own physical form in the process. Still, there was something...menacing, almost, about it.

Victor began to understand the battle Magneto had fought all his life. Everyone, it seemed, was frightened of that which was different.

It didn't seem to notice Victor's misgivings, however...or if it did, it wasn't concerned by them

"Of course I will help you," it said in its emotionless monotone voice. "My programming mandates that I protect life."

"Does that include the lives of the invaders?"

"Yes. I will not destroy them. Destruction is not my purpose. Protection is my purpose."

"Will you protect the Invaders from us? Will you prevent us from destroying them, if we decide it is necessary to protect our world?"

It hesitated to answer for almost a full second. That must seem like an eternity to it, Victor thought. But the response was clear. "I am programmed to protect the people of Earth.  If it is necessary for you to destroy the Invaders, I will not stop you. But I will not destroy them for you."

"I wouldn't ask you to. Thank you."

Protagonist:  Mechanon

Celebration

17 minutes ago, Michael Hopcroft said:

A: It is to protein what Funyuns are to the Vegetable Kingdom.

Q: What can you tell me about Spoo?

A: Not as much fun as, say, being dipped naked in a tank of liquid helium.

Arrive 

4 hours ago, Asperion said:

A:  To boldly go where everyone has gone before.

Q: Honey, why would you want to make out with William Shatner?

A: Half as much money, twice as many oatmeal raisin cookies.

Full beer cans are probably not ideal either.

Spam and eggs. With cheddar and salsa. Wrapped in a tortilla. It's the perfect redneck breakfast.

Speaking of Which:

Ron White vs. Larry the Cable Guy 

Arthritis 

Small pieces of talc?

True, the best thing about the Bears' Super Bowl win in the 80s was that it didn't come at the Broncos' expense.