Guest Celt Posted June 26, 2012 Report Share Posted June 26, 2012 Re: Jokes Fixed it for ya. linkage Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 Re: Jokes Sooo' date=' you've already been fixed? [/quote'] What's out there for knees that hurt? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveZilla Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 Re: Jokes What's out there for knees that hurt? I could get you a pillow. Would that help your knees? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted June 28, 2012 Report Share Posted June 28, 2012 Re: Jokes I could get you a pillow. Would that help your knees? Not really; it's stairs that are a problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 Re: Jokes Then tell people to stop staring. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 Re: Jokes Then tell people to stop staring. I see what you did there. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 Re: Jokes Then tell people to stop staring. Aww, do you have the blues? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 Re: Jokes Oh, brother. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 Re: Jokes Where art thou? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Obvious Posted June 29, 2012 Report Share Posted June 29, 2012 Re: Jokes Well, ain't this place a geographical oddity...two weeks from everywhere. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted July 2, 2012 Report Share Posted July 2, 2012 Re: Jokes Well' date=' ain't this place a geographical oddity...two weeks from everywhere.[/quote'] ...Quick, go to another star system! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Celt Posted July 2, 2012 Report Share Posted July 2, 2012 Re: Jokes Time for a knock-knock joke. [ATTACH=CONFIG]43795[/ATTACH] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveZilla Posted July 2, 2012 Report Share Posted July 2, 2012 Re: Jokes Time for a knock-knock joke. [ATTACH=CONFIG]43795[/ATTACH] Related: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted July 2, 2012 Report Share Posted July 2, 2012 Re: Jokes Still can't compare to Batman: TAS Joker. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveZilla Posted July 3, 2012 Report Share Posted July 3, 2012 Re: Jokes I have seen next to none of TAS, so I have no way to compare them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted July 3, 2012 Report Share Posted July 3, 2012 Re: Jokes I have seen next to none of TAS' date=' so I have no way to compare them.[/quote'] How do you do Youtube links? - Start here. - Some funny ones here. - And a one-liner to finish it off. http://www.sheldoncomics.com/ - Bonus completely unrelated webcomic strip. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted July 3, 2012 Report Share Posted July 3, 2012 Re: Jokes How do you do Youtube links? You can use either of two icons listed above the text window when you write a post: the one near the far left that looks (marginally) like a filmstrip, or the one that looks like the earth with a chain link, just to the right of the smiley icon. Copy and paste the URL for the link into the panel that pops up, then save and post as usual. I look forward to seeing what you have to share. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted July 3, 2012 Report Share Posted July 3, 2012 Re: Jokes You can use either of two icons listed above the text window when you write a post: the one near the far left that looks (marginally) like a filmstrip, or the one that looks like the earth with a chain link, just to the right of the smiley icon. Copy and paste the URL for the link into the panel that pops up, then save and post as usual. I look forward to seeing what you have to share. It looks like just copy-pasting the links works, too - Look up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteveZilla Posted July 3, 2012 Report Share Posted July 3, 2012 Re: Jokes It looks like just copy-pasting the links works' date=' too - Look up. [/quote'] That's what I do. In the past I (and IIRC a couple others) had trouble viewing videos that were added with the filmstrip button. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattingly Posted July 11, 2012 Report Share Posted July 11, 2012 Re: Jokes God was missing for six days. Eventually, Michael, the archangel, found him, resting on the seventh day. He inquired, “Where have you been?” God smiled deeply and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds, “Look, Michael. Look what I’ve made.” Archangel Michael looked puzzled, and said, “What is it?” “It’s a planet,” replied God, ”and I’ve put life on it. I’m going to call it Earth and it’s going to be a place to test Balance.” “Balance?” inquired Michael, “I’m still confused.” God explained, pointing to different parts of Earth. “For example, northern Europe will be a place of great opportunity and wealth, while southern Europe is going to be poor. Over here I’ve placed a continent of white people, and over there is a continent of black people. Balance in all things.” God continued, pointing to different countries. “This one will be extremely hot, while this one will be very cold and covered in ice.” The Archangel, impressed by God’s work, then pointed to a land area and said, “What’s that one?” “That’s West Virginia, the most glorious place on earth. There are beautiful mountains, rivers and streams, lakes, forests, hills, and plains. The people from West Virginia are going to be handsome, modest, intelligent, and humorous, and they are going to travel the world. They will be extremely sociable, hardworking, high achieving, carriers of peace, and producers of good things.” Michael gasped in wonder and admiration, but then asked, “But what about balance, God? You said there would be balance…” God smiled, “Right next to West Virginia is Washington, DC. Just wait till you see the jerks and idiots I put there!” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted July 11, 2012 Report Share Posted July 11, 2012 Re: Jokes I don't think I've ever heard a pro-West Virginia joke Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McCoy Posted July 12, 2012 Report Share Posted July 12, 2012 Re: Jokes I don't think I've ever heard a pro-West Virginia joke I think the only WV joke I've ever heard is how do you know the toothbrush was invented in West Virginia? Anywhere else it would have been called a teethbrush. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted July 12, 2012 Report Share Posted July 12, 2012 Re: Jokes I don't think I've ever heard a pro-West Virginia joke Neither have I, and I lived there for two years. Rep to you, mattingly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SSgt Baloo Posted July 12, 2012 Report Share Posted July 12, 2012 Re: Jokes My room-mate upon my first posting back to America was from West Virginia. Joke spoilered for implied incest: He used to joke: "Know the West Virginia definition of a virgin? That's any girl who can run faster than her brothers." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted July 12, 2012 Report Share Posted July 12, 2012 Re: Jokes RED SKELTON'S RECIPE FOR THE PERFECT MARRIAGE 1. Two times a week we go to a nice Restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays. 2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas. 3. I take my Wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. I asked my Wife where she wanted to go for our Anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the Kitchen. 4. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. 5. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair. 6. My Wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was. She told me, "In the lake." 7. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off. 8. She ran after the Garbage Truck, yelling, "Am I too late for the garbage?" The Driver said, "No, jump in!" 9. REMEMBER: Marriage is the Number One Cause Of Divorce. 10. I married MISS RIGHT. I just didn't know her FIRST NAME was "ALWAYS." 11. I haven't spoken to my Wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her. 12. The last fight was my fault though. My Wife asked, "What's on the TV?" I said, "Dust!" 13. I met my Wife on a Cruise Ship. Boy was I surprised. I thought she was at home. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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