Still working on getting some stuff ready for us touring the US in it and since I don't want to start our tour mid-Winter, we'll probably stay near Seattle until early 2018.
Show me another NFL team site item using the phrase "Galilean transformation".
Love ya, Neil.
EDIT: Sadly, the official rules seem to define what's a forward pass strictly in the stadium frame, not the player frame. So much for relativistic physics.
Show me another NFL team site item using the phrase "Galilean transformation".
Love ya, Neil.
EDIT: Sadly, the official rules seem to define what's a forward pass strictly in the stadium frame, not the player frame. So much for relativistic physics.
If you're not going to show up for the final exam, either contact the instructor beforehand, or have a truly serious illness or injury. And ... assume a hostile assessment of whether "truly serious" applies.
Over a decade ago, I worked for Circuit City. At one point, they licensed the song, "Just What I Needed" by the Cars for use in their advertising. Corporate sent out a special CD single with the song on it for the managers to play to "celebrate" acquiring this song. The store manager decided to put it into the 5 disc changer that we used for Christmas music as the only disc and set it for continuous play as the only song. About a day and a half later, while the store manager was at lunch out of the building, the disc suffered a mysterious accident. Somehow, the disc left the cd player, phased through a locked door, and ended up in the break room's microwave. It died in a pretty blue discharge of ionized aluminum, and then, the disc ended up shattered in the warehouse. A very loud cheer went up from the staff (and probably a few customers, as well) when the song finally stopped playing over the intercom.
(I can neither confirm nor deny having any part in the proceedings).
Pathfinder - Streets of Magnimar - Vermin Control Harshal: Just let me check my Blue Book - I'm sure we can find some kind of secret sex dungeon in Magnimar that will be your tastes. Zin: Sex dungeons? It'll probably be all humans and elves. Not the kind of thing I need to scratch that itch, you know? Harshal: And if they have Half-orc leather daddies? Zin: ... ... OK then.
Before we can start getting our cut from every level of the Adventure Farm, we need to deal with the crime problem in Underbridge. And crime in Underbridge is dominated by three different groups - the Sczarni crime family, who we inadvertently joined forces with that time, the Nightscales, who we've mightily annoyed on multiple occasions, and the Creepers, who have child slaves controlled by a system of terror.
Harshal: Eliminating the Creepers WOULD be a public service...
And the Sczarni were the ones who a priest and his acolytes beaten to death after they refused to make a 'charitable donation' to the needy families of Underbridge. One family in particular... At least the Nightscales don't know that it was us who have screwing with them. One of the independents is the Three Dolphin Milk Parlour, which despite the name is actually a drug den where Midnight Milk users can spend an evening quietly stoned.
Other random facts and rumours about UYnderbridge that will probably become relevant at some point - an engineering marvel in Underbridge, dwarfed by the bridge itself, is the Shadowclock, a lethally decrepit tower now closed to the public, but too sturdy to fall down by itself. Or if you want creepy children's rhymes, there's the one about the Scarecrow, a rumoured serial killer operating in Underbridge.
GM: Underbridge IS the most impoverished section of Magnimar - to the point you really have to wonder about anybody that actually lives there by choice. Harshal: Out of curiosity, did these rumours about the Scarecrow start AFTER Ys moved in?
We decide that the Nightscales will be the best group to deal with, especially if offer them a cut of the profits.
Ys: I'll offer 20%. Harshal: I assume you mean you'll go UP to 20%. Ys: Yeah, we'll start at 5% and let them bargain us up. Gillert: Maybe throw in some free adventuring vouchers? Harshal: I sincerely doubt they'd be interested. Ys: Adventuring is the quickest way to make money in Golarion. It's also the quickest way to make yourself dead. Your basic life of crime is much safer.
Harshal starts looking for Mr. White and Mr. Black, the Nightscales 'legal representatives'. They're proving a little difficult to track down, which might be because they're false identities donned when needed, or because they're daemons in service to Asmodeus, the Daemon Prince of Lawyers.
Ys: You two will have to do the negotiating. Gillert: Will you be there to loom menacingly? Ys: No no no, I don't do intimidation. Harshal: Ys is an assassin, Gillert - she does her best work when you don't notice she was there at all.
Gillert is in the middle of paperwork down at our importing business when Mister Black and White make a sudden appearance.
Harshal: I see we need to arrange better security down there.
Gillert explains that we have an idea of mutual benefit, but wants to have the rest of there before we open negotiations.
Harshal: At the very least you want enough of us here to form quorum.
Harshal: I was just in the middle of considering internal rules for our little association - for example, if we need to remove one of us from membership and this mortal coil, does the vote have to be simple majority, or unanimous? Ys: No, you just tell me and I do it. Gillert: And it all becomes much less democratic. Note to self - Ys-proof my house.
Harshal: Did Misters Black and White have any preferences for where they'd like to conduct these negotiations? GM: They didn't say. Harshal: We'll assume they just turn up then. GM: They do. 'Sir? There's two strange men on the end of the pier' Harshal: Ah good, we were expecting them. Send them in. Refreshments? Gillert: I'll put the kettle on.
The Nightscales are a bit unhappy with the idea of opening the Irespan - for one thing, it will require extra security in places they don't want attention drawn to.
Ys: What if the Nightscales provide that security? Mr White: Difficult. The organization has recently experienced some set-backs in terms of personnel.
Mr White DOES has a counter-offer, which will make it it much easier for the Nightscales to occupy a power vacuum, provide the service we want from them, and let us get our hands on some of those flamethrowers we suspect the Nightscales now have.
Mr White: There is a certain population of vermin in Underbridge who are growing in number. The moon-touched. Harshal: Ah - were-rats. Ys: Wait, what? GM: Harshal has it. Harshal: City-dwelling criminal scum with a lunar connection - of course it's were-rats. GM: And, you know, the vermin thing too.
Harshal: So, Ys, you have no problem with exterminating the Magnimar population of Were-rats? Ys: I'd have no problem with wiping out the population of Magnimar. GM: She IS an equal-opportunity killer.
Harshal: Were-rats on top of nests of goblins - what a pity we never figured out how to flood the sewers with acid.
Harshal: Everybody bear this in mind before we go in - Lucretia the were-rat might be hot, but all other were-rats are vermin.
Harshal: I'm going to get my back-up dagger silvered as well. I might have to stab more than one lycanthrope. Gillert: Do we want to invest in a silver pellet grenade? Harshal: Probably. 'Oh look, a nest of were-rat children and infants' Pull pin. Lob.
We consult our contact Iria the alchemist regarding urban lycanthropes. It's not like we can ask the lycanthropes themselves - the were-rats are too sneaky and the village of other were-folk near Magnimar got wiped out in an unprovoked attack by city militia.
Iria: Were-rats also carry Filth Fever. Don't contract it. Harshal: Is there a cure?
Iria: No specific. Harshal: Let's assume colloidal silver. Zin: I'm already bright green, I don't want to be blue as well.
Iria also prepares some prophylactic infusions.
Gillert: She's an alchemist, not a maker of prophylactics. Harshal: Prophylactic as an adjective, not a colloquial noun. Gillert: Oh. Harshal: Yes, it's not like she's making a homeopathic solution of condoms. GM: She does recommend anything to protect you from disease. Harshal: OK, maybe it is condoms. Gillert: We're going to the bathhouse. Zin: Hey, I bathe! Harshal: Oh, you go to an *actual*bathhouse! I understand now - carry on. Zin: *blushes bright red* Gillert: .... *facepalm*
Harshal and Zin go to Gillert to their weapons silvered - Ys prepares her own Silver Blanch to apply as needed.
Gillert: If there's a Rust Monster down there we've got problems. GM: That WOULD be a dick move on my part
GM: The were-rats favour the dock area. Harshal: Makes sense - they must be water rats. Do they all have Norwegian accents? GM: I'll pretend you didn't say that. Oddly enough they avoid the Rat Tavern.
But we do hear rumours of a newly-arrived were-rat named Moonbreaker, who has emboldened Magnimar's population of the secretive vermin. He's not as sneaky as the rest of them, but he IS a heavy hitter, and he can break weapons. The were-rats may even have discovered the Silverblood ritual.
GM: Why am I not surprised that Ys knows about the Silverblood ritual? Harshal: Horrible ritual with horrible side-effects? Of course she does.
The ritual removes the vulnerability to silver weapons, at the risk of wasting to death during the new moon.
GM: Were-rats are also the reason ratfolk are unpopular. Zin: I thought they were same thing. Gillert: You made the same mistake everybody else does. Harshal: All rodents look alike to me. Ys: What Have The Rodents Ever Done For Us?
We also find out exactly why the Nightscales can't deal with them themselves. Moonbreaker killed so many Nightscales that the Nightscales had to beg for a ceasefire. And that was AFTER they ambushed Moonbreaker. And Harshal receives a whispered message in one ear while he was out at a bar, gathering information. Which is a bit strange, since he was sitting with his back to the wall, watching the door at the time.
"You may want to investigate the Swift Dolphin Warehouse, if you're seeking the Stonecutter Clan. But be warned, they are allied with something from afar."
The mysterious speaker has quite a high-pitched voice, and smells of honeysuckle. And is apparently small enough to fit INSIDE the wall, since Harshal actually hears them scurrying away, despite the mysterious informants huge stealth bonuses. And while were-rats can turn into rats, they can't speak in that form.
Harshal: Well then. On top of all the other information networks operating in Magnimar, one of them has agents small enough to fit behind wooden panelling. GM: Homunculi? Harshal: Imps. Ys: A kobold hit with a Shrink spell.
But the honeysuckle might be a clue, since it can be used to conceal earthy smells. And whoever the informant is, they were concerned enough by that possibility to drench themselves in enough honeysuckle that Harshal could smell them through the wall.
GM: A fairy Dragon would naturally smell of honeysuckle, but wouldn't hide. 'OK, I need to go now' EUPHORIA CLOUD. Gillert: The exact kind of familiar a stoner wizard would have.
Off to investigate the were-rat infested warehouse.
Harshal: Appropriate. Gillert: Where else would were-rats live? The warehouse. Gillert: Were we going to kidnap one of the wererats for information? Harshal: I don't believe so. If the opportunity to torture one for information comes up, sure - torture then kill is morally equivalent to just kill, isn't it?
GM: Rats the size of dogs do tend to attract attention. Except in Underbridge. Ys: Nobody seems to be watching the building, anyway. Harshal: Or the people of Underbridge have just learned that it doesn't pay to be too nosy about your neighbor's business.
Harshal: Since we've re-opened the docks north of Underbridge, there's a chance this warehouse can be re-opened. So, do we clear the drug addicts out tonight? Ys: If it comes up. The question is how. Harshal: I suggest fake daemonic possession. Gillert: 'Fake'? Ys: I was just going to lock the doors and set it on fire. Harshal: But then you lose the building too.
We sneak up to the building, carrying braces to seal the doors, and prepared to commit major arson.
Harshal OoC: It's almost like we're playing Call of Cthulhu. GM: With these players, sure. That and a lifetime discount on dynamite.
Unfortunately, the warehouse has people on watch that can recognise attempted arson when they see it coming. Various gaunt elf Milk addicts crawl out of cover.
Harshal: Elves that are addicted to Milk, not people addicted to elf-milk. GM: Given some of the internet references to elf-milk that I've seen, eww.
Gillert recognises what they are - they can't be drug addicts, since they're immune to drugs. And addiction. And any kind of characteristic drain.
GM: They're ghouls. Harshal: Oh f**k. GM: Which explains how they were so good at staying still for a long time.
Ys runs in and decapitates one. Harshal considers the fact that Gillert and Zin both do ranged attacks, and reluctantly runs in to run another through himself. Unfortunately, he's promptly mauled and paralysed by the third ghoul, which is just ONE reason he was reluctant to move in and assist Ys. At least Gillert slaps some Invisibility on Harshal so the barrister might actually survive this. Unfortunately, all the howling of the Ghouls attracts thugs. And when Harshal, still paralysed, fades back into visibility, he's a very tempting target. They still fail to hit him.
GM: His blade glances off your armour. Harshal: Just as well I bought it then. But the look of withering contempt I give the thug is probably wounding in and of itself.
Harshal: I came here to set addicts on fire and honestly I'm feeling so attacked right now.
But before long the lead thug finds himself outnumbered four-to-one, drinks a spring-loaded potion, and turns invisible. He runs off, while we loot the bodies and set up the warehouse fire. We don't even go into the building, but then, we're not exactly the kind of clientele the drug den would welcome. The fire gets reported in a special morning edition of Parvo's newspaper. It's the tone of the report that we have issues with.
MIDNIGHT BLAZE - GANG VIOLENCE IN UNDERBRIDGE - Sign of things to come? Irespan Expedition in Question
Harshal: F********ck. Reporter: Eyewitness accounts infer that the Flying Fox organised the bucket chain. Harshal: Hmm. I wonder if our young reporter friend is also the Flying Fox. GM: Can't be - she wears glasses.
It's also annoying to hear that no bodies were found inside the building. And that the ghoul bodies went missing. The other bodies were found stripped.
Harshal: Well, it is Underbridge. GM: That was you - you took everything but their shorts. Reporter: While the building was damaged, it appears it can be repaired. Gillert: Oh look, a warehouse going cheap. GM: It's a classic.
On the other hand the article confirms that the warehouse belonged to a defunct trading company.
Harshal: Oh look, a warehouse going cheap. GM: Eh - that just adds to the legal snarl as the figure out who actually owns it. Harshal: Whoever it is, I bet they haven't been paying their taxes on the building. So if we pay to get the building repaired... Real estate law is not my speciality, but does the phrase 'eminent domain' come into play here? It falling into our hands is clearly to the city's benefit.
Gillert also notices that our young reporter friend got that article written, typeset, and printed remarkably quickly, if she also had to go to Underbridge to get the information as well. At least Parvo Crispin suggests it's the Underbridge gangs getting stirred up in anticipation of the new income stream. Gillert and Harshal investigate the ruins, and find, as Harshal expected, concealed escape tunnels that were collapsed behind them. We decide not to spread this information.
Harshal: We don't want people thinking about stuff from the Irespan escaping into the sewers. GM: Some Magnimareans would argue that that is a fair fight. Harshal: But just picture the scene - you're sitting reading the day's broadsheet, and suddenly a giant man-eating spider comes up the s-bend.
Harshal also comes down poorly - it's ghoul fever!
Zin: I'm calling in Iria on this one. GM: It's a win-win for her - either she heals a friend, or she gets to study someone succumb to ghoul fever.
Of course, this whole drug den disaster does raise questions about Harshal's original intel. Mostly, while did they believe Harshal when he said a wall talked to him, especially since he's clearly raving now?
Ys: Most of the time, if someone succumbs to Ghoul Fever, they become a ghoul. But don't worry, this won't happen to you. Harshal: Hmm. Quite. GM: ? Harshal: She means she'll kill me.
Ys: I don't like undead. Things I kill should say that way. Harshal: I don't like undead either - they hardly ever carry money.
It's going to be a few days until we even know if Iria's treatment is working.
Harshal: I can't go out and gather information in this state. Ys: Which is why I'm going to do it. Harshal: Well, if you hear any voices from inside walls, you know what to do. Ys: Yes. Kill them. Harshal: Well, that wasn't what I met, but- GM: It'll be amusing to watch you try.
Ys: I could disguise myself as a were-rat, fake a beating, and see if the were-rats come to my rescue. Harshal: Two problems there - your disguise might not hold up to close inspection. And since you're disguised as a were-rat, your average Magnimarean would help put the boot in.
Ys does get the mysterious honeysuckle voice - they're a bit upset with us that we didn't follow up our attack. She also manages to spot the source - a tiny hooded figure.
Honeysuckle Whisperer: You can see me. Ys: Well, caught a glimpse. Honeysuckle Whisperer: Damn. I have instructions in case this happened. Meet me in the alley.
Our informant is, in fact, a tiny humanoid rat.
Ys: I can see why you have a problem with were-rats. But don't worry, I'll treat you just the way I treat everybody else. Honeysuckle Whisperer: I'd rather NOT be horribly killed, thank you very much. Ys: Hey, I don't kill EVERYBODY I meet. Honeysuckle Whisperer: That remains to be seen.
The tiny rat-things really don't have much more information they can give us - they're trying to avoid the were-rats and their undead pets, after all. Our informant scurries off - but as she'll leaving Ys spots ANOTHER tiny robed figure, broader in the shoulder, sneaking around. Ys sneakily pursues, until the second figure pounces on the first, and roughs them up a bit.
Second Sneaker: You got SPOTTED. Give me one good reason why I shouldn't eat you for that. Ys: Because you got spotted too.
The second figure denies any responsibility for anything going wrong. That's probably because it's a cat.
Ys: You're cute. Second Sneaker: HISS Harshal: Yeah, sleek, pretty, murderer, I can see the resemblance.
Apparently these guys have a few rules that they are supposed to follow.
Second Sneaker: Not to go on all fours! That is the Law! The Claw punishes the Paw for Disobedience! That is the Law!
Ys passes on SOME of what she discovered - chiefly that the were-rats congregate under Underbridge - and eventually Iria gives Harshal a clean bill of health.
Harshal: We should have asked 'How would WE run an illegal drug den?' And then yes, the escape tunnel would have been obvious.
So, time for some systematic exploration of the Underbridge sewers.
Harshal: Exactly how many nights a week are we going to be doing this? Because I do have a day job. Expeditions into the sewers may have SOME resemblance to working as a lawyer in Magnimar, but I can't do it for 24 hours a day.
Zin wants to buy some more Hide From Animals potions.
Potion Shopkeeper: Not much call for them here. Harshal: Hardly surprising - the only animals in the city that you'd want to avoid are guard dogs.
Harshal: We're going to need protection from the smell down there too. Should we get Plague Doctor masks? Zin: Just pee on a bandana and tie it across your face.
There's also the problem that the Magnimar sewers were designed by a madman who wanted to leave lots of places for Norgorber cultists to hide.
GM: Oh, and did I mention that some sections apparently move around?
Of course, there's the OTHER problem that only Zin has any sort of tracking skill.
GM: Hey! Rat dropping! And rat footprints! Oh wait...
Zin narrowly avoids some kind of trap that sprayed an unknown liquid.
GM: But with all the precautions you took, none of you can smell what it was.
Ys: I'll collect a sample. Harshal: Hopefully it's not Green Slime.
Then we hear the squeaking approach of many small hairy vermin.
Ys: Rat swarm! GM: 'Swarm', singular?
Ys legs it, Harshal is caught flat-footed, and Zin swigs one of the Hide From Animals potions.
GM: Which will work right up until you're touched by an animal. Zin: I'd better get climbing then.
The rats ignore Zin, and attack Harshal as they try to get past him and at Ys.
Harshal: Is this normal behavior for rats? GM: Do you have Handle Animals or any kind of Knowledge Nature skill? Harshal: Nope. GM: Then you have NO IDEA why they behaving like this. Ys' player can guess why, because he knows what a bastard I am. Harshal: ? GM: Ys is carrying a sample of rat bait. Harshal: Then why are they attacking me? GM: Because you're in the way.
Zin: I'd rather not get TPKed by rats.
Ys is getting desperate, and starts lobbing acid flasks. Despite herself and Harshal being in the splash zone. She gets off much more likely than he does.
Ys: Someone up there likes me. GM: I think you're looking in the wrong direction.
Zin figures out that they must be trying to get the rag Ys collected her sample with. Ys throws it away, and the rats head off in pursuit. The trap sprayed Beast Bait.
GM: I'm quite proud of that idea.
We spot a lurking figure at about the same time it spots it realises it's been spotted - we don't pursue.
Ys: Do you really want to follow it into whatever ambush they have planned? We'll move past and try to double back on them.
It doesn't do us any good - we get shot in the back with crossbows a little later on, largely because Harshal has the group nicely illuminated with his lantern. Ys pursues, because she has no need for light. But our assailants are fleeing in pitch blackness too, which is odd for were-rats, since they should need at least some light.
Harshal: So exactly how many dangerous species and organizations are down here? I'm betting that trap was set by CHUDs. GM: Do you want me to count the Norgorber cults as one organization, or split them up?
There IS an ambush, but Ys was expecting one by this point anyway. Somewhat surprisingly, it's a female were-rat. Clearly whatever markings they've laid are visible to low-light vision, but invisible to normal vision or darksight. Worse, the bushwhacker is that rumoured were-rat combat monster with the Sunder feat, as Ys learns when one of her silvered kukris gets shattered. And then someone starts summoning giant rats into the combat. At least its Smite Good is completely wasted, since Ys is not in the vaguest sense Good. But even after Harshal and Ys catch up, the situation does not immediately improve for our party of rogues - the were-rat and her back-up are simply that bad-ass. Luckily for us, Harshal's silvered rapier find one of the holes in the were-rat's chainmail, and gets driven through her kidney and out the other side. That still leaves the giant rat and whoever is throwing spells at us, and that none of us can see.
Harshal: If it turns out to be Gillert I'll be quite annoyed.
And then the body of the combat monster vanishes.
Harshal: The f**k???? Zin: *fumbling around blindly* I think I feel boob! Ys: Then finish her off! Silversniffer: *Popping into existence*NOOOOOOOOO! GM: He does have a reason to be this stupid - Lovesick. Harshal: Guessed as much - that Big No was a bit of a clue. Zin, you know where her tit is, you can probably guess where her heart is.
Zin coup de grace the unconscious were-woman, and instantly becomes the target for the spellcaster's revenge.
Zin: I am mostly OK with this, providing you two finish him off.
Zin backpedals fast, and puts a crossbow into the spellcaster's heart. Which is probably a mercy, frankly. Silversniffer really was that besotted with Moonbreaker. But at least we still have silvered weapons intact, so the rest of the clan will probably hold off on mobbing us. The loot includes an old journal.
Zin: Probably love poetry.
The spellcaster also had no material components - which implies he was a psychic sorcerer.
GM: He could stay hidden under his camo net and think bad thoughts at people.
We head back to the surface - with the were-rats' heaviest hitters nicely murdered, follow-up attempts at genocide should go much more smoothly, assuming the lycanthropes don't just scatter.
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