Mantis

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Would Tom Cruise be a Xenuphobe?

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 

Trivia: The Titanic was a modern vessel for its time, and was one of the few ships in the world to carry the new-fangled wireless equipment. When it struck the iceberg it became the first ship in the world to send out the universal call for help that we know so well today, "Mayo-day!"

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 

In case folks haven't seen this before: 
http://www.kiddofspeed.com/default.htm
 
Elena has a pass to ride her motorbike through the Chernobyl restricted area, she has taken photos and posted them on-line.

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 

 
Old Doc has been feeling bad lately. I thought some virtual flowers, since we can't send real ones, would cheer him up.

Re: Jokes
 
Man discovered weapons and invented hunting; woman discovered hunting and invented furs. Man discovered colors and invented painting; woman discovered painting and invented make-up. Man discovered speech and invented conversation; woman discovered conversation and invented gossip. Man discovered agriculture and invented food; woman discovered food and invented diet. Man discovered friendship and invented love; woman discovered love and invented marriage. Man discovered woman and invented sex; woman discovered sex and invented headaches. Man discovered trade and invented money; woman discovered money and after that, man was a complete mess!

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 

We have a winner! 
The other posters were:
 
Bazza
ghost-angel
death tribble
rpmiller
AliceTheOwl
L. Marcus
Cancer
Vanguard00
 
all of whom are Ascended. Of course, with 30+ Gods (I stopped counting) who are also the most active posters, it shouldn't really be a surprise that a page in a thread can be all but filled with their posts. But being generally slow on the uptake (Physical Limitation: Can't catch the Clue Bus, All the Time, Fully Impairing), I was caught by surprise.
 
New topic: umm, I've got nuthin'. Bueller?

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 

Because you posted it? Because you're the first on the page to not be Ascended? Because you're the first to post with that particular title?
 
I give up.

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 
Well, I decided not to fork over any money to the Nigerian Golden Key Foundation, but then I received an email from the Uni telling me I'd been awarded a Scholarship. Now I had never applied for a Scholarship , so I was initially suspicious - a bit like your e-mail address winning a lottery you've never entered. But I found out it's on the up-and-up - there are 10 scholarships awarded annually by the School of IT to 2nd year students based on academic merit. The downside is the money will be paid in instalments "subject to satisfactory academic progress as defined by the School" so I'll have to keep up the good work (which reminds me, I have two assignments due next week which I haven't started yet.... ).

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 

I posted a super-short fantasy story once. I wonder how many read it . . . ?
 
Edit: Hah! Found it! Between Day And Night! Sixty-three views, no replies . . .

Re: The Last Word
 
The wedding invitation
 
I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend well she was a dream!
 
There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed, and that one thing was her younger sister.
 
My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when quite near me and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear.
 
It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else.
 
One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the Wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome.
 
She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word.
 
She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned. I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs.
 
When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me.
 
I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house. I walked straight towards my car.
 
My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."
 
 
 
The moral of this story is:
 
Always keep your condoms in your car!

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me. It was her beautiful younger sister.
 
My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was braless. She would regularly bend down when she was near me, and I always got more than a pleasant view. She never did it when she was near anyone else.
 
One day "little" sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived, and she whispered to me that she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister.
 
Well, I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want one last wild fling, just come up and get me."
 
I was stunned- frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. She pulled off her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and made a beeline straight to The front door. I opened the door, and headed straight towards my car. Lo and behold, my entire future family was standing outside, all clapping!
 
With tears in his eyes, my future father-in-law hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test.....we couldn't ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."
 
And the moral of this story is:
 
Always keep your condoms in your car.

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 

 
On the Internet?!? Good luck finding either "thought" or "human nature" here.

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 
The 1918 pandemic started at Fort Riley, Kansas.

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 

 
You mean something like this?
 
Excuse the crappy photomanip, I did this in about 10 minutes just because it sounded like fun.

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
My mother was watching the winter olympic opening credits and was puzzled over why the american team entered right behind spain.
 
I explained that it was because they were being introduced in alphabetical order...in Italian.
 
Then I wondered how they were going to arrange the countries when the olympics move to China...

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 

Dude ... you look like a terrorist. Download them images and use 'em as props ("Here you are, heroes ... that's your perpetrator. Find him.")

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 

Re: NGD Scenes from a Hat
 
"That was a great hummer, honey, but you're still not as good at it as your sister is."

Re: The cranky thread
 

Xmas gets me down, too. I've never had a good Xmas, this one won't be an exception.

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 

I would, except I don't have HeroDesigner.  
Haven't had a chance to think about the issues you're having in order to suggest solutions. As time permits and inspiration strikes, I'll let you know if I have any ideas.

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 
Look what I found.
 
http://www.shibumi.org/eoti.htm
 
Who knew there was a last page.

Re: Champions Jargon
 
A new one from this week:
 
CLOSET FIGHT: A fight that takes place in a space so small that you can barely manage a Range Penalty on your attacks. Good for bricks and martial artists, bad for blasters and psionics.
 
FINGERPOKE OF DOOM: Stolen from the WCW 'storyline' (look it up at Wikipedia as 'Fingerpoke of Doom'), this just became our new 'attack that does no damage' line, after Cheshire Cat threw a 12d6 attack at our magnetic character and didn't even muster knockback).
 
THE SUPERHERO OPERATIONS MANUAL: A throwaway bit I invented early in the game that started catching on ... whenever you need a random source of advice, or a reason to follow a convention of the genre ("Why don't we take his mask off?"), it's because the Superhero Operations Manual says so. "Well, when laying face-down on the floor with a ticked off Black Diamond standing over you, the Superhero Operations Manual recommends prayer."
 
Possibly printed by the same publisher that printed the Junior Woodchuck's Guidebook.

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 
Thanks for the kind wishes, folks. I'm not panicking - I only need 50% to pass, and even without knowing about Module 6 I was well over that when doing my practice runs! It helps that half the exam marks come from 20 multiple choice questions (2.5 marks for correct answers, -0.5 marks for wrong answers). I should get the first 40% or so just from these.
 
The subject matter in Module 6 wasn't that difficult either, in fact I'm now looking at it as an easy way to pick up marks!

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Right now, I'm supposed to be working.