Pariah

Who led the children of Israel across the semipermeable membrane?

Now if only we could get Dick & Charlie Monfort to sell the Rockies....

I got the first three pretty quickly—the same first three as yours, and in the same order—and then kicked myself for not immediately knowing the fourth.

Trivia question I saw this morning: Can you name the four major North American professional sports teams named after bears?

I guess the point of goin' to college Was to acquire myself a little knowledge And help me figure out What life was really all about It made Peets and J.D. happy And set me wild and free Then I danced out of Mississippi To the University of Bourbon Street I sang, "Hey (hey), Pocky A-way" On the streetcar headed uptown I went to class (sure did) every day And never wore a frown I was taught by the Neville Brothers Benny Spellman, and a whole lotta others That brass band blew my mind When I joined in the second line I felt the power of the gris-gris Got my soul saved by the backbeat I was branded by Jean Lafitte At the University of Bourbon Street I sang on a paddlewheel boat Floated down the Mississippi Helped build a Mardi Gras float And smoked a joint with a beautiful hippie I heard a church choir sing "Change my guitar strings" Thought things just couldn't get better 'Til I walked to the Central Grocery And had myself a muffaletta I took my lunchbox to the streetcar That Tennessee named, "Desire" Then I followed my dancin' feet To the University of Bourbon Street Yeah, we got high-class, low-rent Voodoo information Pat O'Brien's hurricane accreditation Old-school sex education And I learned how to eat From the music and the people To the cookin' and the joy It really ain't a mystery I just followed my dancin' feet To the University of Bourbon Street I got my Lucky Dog Ph.D. At the University of Bourbon Street Yeah, I just followed my dancin' feet To the University of Bourbon Street And a Po' Boy Master's Degree At the University of Bourbon Street It's all sweet, darling University of Bourbon Street Hand me that umbrella Follow me to school University of Bourbon Street University of Bourbon Street

She never tells me that she's sick of this house She never says, "Why don't you get off that couch?" She don't cost me nothing when she wants to go out I want you to love me like my dog She never says I need a new attitude Her and your sister ain't always in a feud When I leave the seat up, she don't think that it's rude I want you to love me like my dog does, baby When I come home, want you to just go crazy She never looks at me like she might hate me I want you to love me like my dog She never acts like she don't care for my friends She never asks me, "Where the hell have you been?" She don't play dead any time I walk in I want you to love me like my dog does, honey She never says, "I wish you made more money" She always thinks that pull my finger's funny I want you to love me like my dog She don't get mad at me and throw a major fit 'Cause I said her sister was a b**** I want you to love me like my dog does, baby When I come home, want you to just go crazy She never looks at me like she might hate me I want you to love me like my dog Why won't you love me like my dog does, baby

As an entertaining design exercise, somebody at Uni-Watch has undertaken to redesign the uniforms for all the NFL teams—with heavy emphasis on "uniform". Basically, they imagined what the teams would look like if everyone used the same uniform template. The results are interesting, and in many cases much better than what the teams are wearing right now (cough*Broncos*cough). Article links (which include individual images for each team) and composite images below: Spoiler for lots of pics.

One of those situations where the alternate uniform is better than what the team usually wears. The San Jose Sharks rolled these out a few days ago:

Until Valhalla, Ingenuity Mars Helicopter. We will raise a glass and sing songs in your honor.

The other quote that came up, in conversation with a colleague after the fact, was "Illegitimi non carborundum."

I have to say that after 4th period today that H.L. Mencken quote about raising the black flag came almost irresistibly to mind.

Q: Why don't you want to run against me? Are you chicken? A: All feathers, no eggs.

Reasons for me to root for and against each team (YRMV) For San Francisco: * Christian McCaffrey is the son of longtime Broncos receiver Ed McCaffrey * It would be fun to see Mr. Irrelevant get a ring Against San Francisco: * I wanted the Lions to win * They beat Denver in the most lopsided Super Bowl in history For Kansas City: * Andy Reid is a disciple of LaVell Edwards * They knocked out the Ravens * Bonus: My brother-in-law is a full-tilt Swiftie Against Kansas City: * Division rival * It would be fun to see Kadarius Toney not get a ring

The Niners may be the early favorites, but it seems to me a man could lose a lot of money betting against Patrick Mahomes. Even if I were a betting man, I wouldn't touch this game. Especially after what I've seen today. Everything changes, nothing is certain, and it ain't over till it's over.

e.g., the Carolina Panthers in Super Bowl 50.

Lamar Jackson did not get a lot of help from his team today. Four personal fouls in a game? Seriously? And the last one was among the dumbest penalties I have ever seen. Towards the end of the game, Lamar's body language seemed to become increasingly frustrated. The guy's had a fantastic season, but goodness gracious, this game just has to have driven him nuts.

... And Kansas City punches their ticket for their fourth Super Bowl in 5 years. Only two other teams have ever done that, the Bills and the Patriots. If the Chiefs end up winning, do we start talking about Mahomes and Reid the same way people have been talking about Brady and Belichick?

The Ravens are down 10 late in the 4th quarter, and Lamar Jackson just threw a pick in the end zone. I don't know how you come back from something like that.

tl;dr Drones! Ravens vs. Chiefs: NFL forced to briefly pause AFC championship game for peculiar reason

That's got to be the longest sporting event I've ever heard of.

I apologize in advance, because this is one of the worst jokes I've ever heard. -P Did you hear about that princess who kissed a frog?

Best wishes for your uncle and the rest of your family.

They still have a better record than the Pistons....

A band director was walking on the beach when he came upon an old lamp. You know the story; he rubbed the lamp, a genie appeared and granted him a wish. The band director thought long and hard, and finally said "I'd really like to have peace in the Middle East." The genie said "I've been in that lamp for a thousand years...what's going on in the Middle East?" The band director produced his smart phone with its news updates and a map of the Middle East, showing the various factions at odd with each other, the socio-economic issues, and the constantly shifting boundaries over the centuries. The genie studied the map and finally said, "I don't think I can grant this wish...it's just too complicated. Isn't there another wish you would like?" The band director thought about it and said, "Well...I've always wanted a saxophone player who could play in tune." The genie quickly said, "Let me see that map again."

Which can pull a heavier load, a pregnant horse or a horse that isn't pregnant?