BoloOfEarth

His real title should probably have been "Why Many Women Are Not Sexually Attracted To Me."

I went into the local pizza place and they had this out...

My namesake character (Bolo) was created back in the first-edition days, and my players and I pretty much maxed out the disads for as many points to play with as possible. Bolo was Vulnerable to Fire Attacks, Vulnerable to Explosions, and Hunted by Firewing. (Yeah, not the smartest collection of disads.) I remember one time he got one-shot taken out by one of Firewing's agents with a Flame Grenade.

"Heavy". Heh. I see what you did there. "Why are things so heavy in the future? Is there a problem with the Earth's gravitational pull?" (On a side note: As I was typing in the quote, as soon as I got to "Earth" my laptop automatically filled in the last two words. I approve.)

I'm realizing that cremation may be my only chance to have a smokin' hot bod.

On the plus side, he'll be able to carve his girlfriend's and his name into his cell wall. Moron.

Only one has to go? Not all?

I've seen signs in our neighborhood with wording like "Please Slow Down! Precious Children Live Here!" I've commented before that I've wondered whether there are signs that read "Go Ahead and Speed - We Don't Like These Kids".

I heard a story of a woman who did this regularly, and then one day her son asked whether they should throw out the cereal -- because the box's expiration date was over a year old. BTW, this pic would be way funnier if he was pouring in some other generic cereal, like a Frosted Flakes derivative, into the Froot Loops box.

I'm just surprised they spelled "Only" correctly.

Will Hero Games have any presence at GenCon 2023? I want to stop by, say hi and thanks to anybody from the company.

Watched a bunch of bad movies with those same robots and made a bunch of snarky comments throughout. While on the Satellite of Love. NT: What's the first wacky thing you do once you get to Mars?

Now, why would I do that again? Convert my spacesuit to make me look like Mickey Mouse.

So... only about 40% of the electorate, then?

As you wish.

A former coworker and her husband once went to their kids' concert, and after they played, my coworker noticed her husband wasn't clapping. She asked him why, and he replied, "Because they sucked!"

Thin-sliced weasel anus? I'm afraid I don't share your culinary expertise.

I can't read the titles for Janeway's and B'Elanna's books.

Only they're going for the whole card, not just five in a row.

So... before my wife and I had any kids, I told her that I wanted to name our first-born son after my father and her father, as that was how I was named (after my two grandfathers). Thus, if we had a son, his first and middle names would be William James. Fast forward a few years... we have two kids, both girls. I'm happy to have them, not disappointed at all at not having a son. But the story of our "son's" name does get told to the girls at some point. Fast forward many more years, and my now-adult daughters tell me that back in middle school and high school they had an imaginary big brother, of course named William James. They even told their friends and classmates about him - how my wife and I were somehow upset that he joined the military (which also explained his absence from our home), and that we didn't have any pictures on display of him because we were so worried about him and didn't want constant reminders.

Whoever came up with this:

During the lecture, have a message from extraterrestrials come in, saying, "Stop trying to contact us, already! We checked you out, and there's NO WAY we're getting involved in that $&!%! You humans are cray-cray-crazy!" NT: Unexpected reasons why the extraterrestrials haven't contacted us yet.

Would she say that it's a... global conspiracy?

Because "Make America Stupid" was already effectively taken?