death tribble

Re: Answers & Questions
 

Q. What authoritative quote used by Kirby caused Lolth the Queen of the Demonweb Pits to deluge him in poisonous, flesh eating spiders ?
 
A. That's why I wrote it

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 

I thought you hardier than this

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 
I awoke at 5 am, took a shower, shaved, and put on my chef whites for I had a long day of cooking ahead of me.
 
I started with the pies. Seven of them. Three different types of apple pie, a mince meat, a pumpkin, a pumpkin cheesecake, and a pecan. That kept me busy until a little after 8 am.
 
I dropped two pounds of Yukon Gold potatoes into my smaller stock pot to boil, then started in on the dressing. Mayonnaise, diced bacon, onion, celery, sage, thyme, and some diced dill pickle mixed in with half a cup of chicken stock and a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar. Best damned potato salad you've ever tasted. That took me until 9.
 
At nine, I started up the charcoal in the smoker and let it burn down for a while. A foot on each end of the smoker's three foot long grill was covered in tin foil, so the turkey and ham that would be sitting on it would be cooked thorugh indirect heat. But at this point, the coals were still flaming. This took five minutes.
 
I went back inside and assembled the cornbread stuffing. Unfortunately, when I asked those going to the grocery store for corn meal, they brought me back fine ground rather than rough ground. I could still use it for stuffing, but it wouldn't have that great mouth feel and consistency that regular cornbreak stuffing has.
 
I washed the stock pot in which I had boiled potatoes, and once it was clean I put two pounds of fresh cranberries, along with a cup of sugar, two cups of orange juice, two tablespoons of cinammon, and a tablespoon of orange zest into it. I turned the heat up so as to make the juice boil.
 
While waiting, I chopped up a leak, a large onion, some scallions, and three garlic cloves. These I sauteed while stirring my cranberries. Once the aromatics were transluscent, I added the sausage, mushrooms, celery, and apples for the second type of stuffing I was making. These I let sweat for a while.
 
I stirred my cranberries some more as I put together the batter for my sweet carrot bread. Imagine carrot cake but thicker. Anyway, this took me ten minutes, and during that ten minutes the cranberries had popped.
 
I put the batter in the oven to bake, got out my stick blender, and did a quick puree on the cranberries. They came out with the thickness of applesauce, and this was just perfect. In the service bowl, cover, then in the fridge with the potato salad.
 
Everything was sweated down in the sautee pan, so I added a pound of croutons and a cup of chicken stock. Stir well, heat for five minutes over low heat, and voia: stuffing.
 
A quick check on the temps of my smoking turkey and ham. They're fine, and turning a brilliant deep brown. Perfect.
 
I go back inside, drop some butter into another sautee pan, then add a pound of asparagus I had blanced the night before. While they are lightly sauteeing, I take out a mixing bowl and add balsamic vinegar, olive oil, more minced garlic, and some S&P. A drain the asparagus, arrange them on a serving plate, and drizzle the dressing over them.
 
I peel and chop the sweet potatoes and add them to a pot containing a cup of orange juice, a cup of water, more cinammon, some ground cloves, and three cups of brown sugar. I let this boil for 15 minutes before removing the potatoes. I add a cup of bourbon to the sauce, let it thicken up, then add them and the potatoes to a baking dish. Into the oven for a bit.
 
I cut green beans and add them to another sautee pan with butter and olive oil. To the beans I add onion, garlic, and half a pound of sliced portobello mushrooms. These sautee for five minutes before I add a cup of sherry. I impress my kitchen help by setting fire to the sherry.
 
Last but not least, I sautee the remaining portobellos, along with some shitake, white button, porcini, oyster, and chanterelle mushrooms, in olive oil along with some scallions chopped fine.
 
All done by 1:30. And we ate like kings.

Re: Answers & Questions
 

Q. What punctuation goes speeding around the Sun the fastest ?
 
A. Of course you can have a threesome with my wife ! Right after I introduce you to my friends Smith and Wesson and their version of a six pack...

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Last February I moved from the CA Bay Area to the Dallas Metroplex. (Long story, won't bore ya...)
 
It's the first time I've ever moved out of state... hell, the first time I've really changed location in any significant way. I got all the obligatory warnings from my friends back home when I told them where I was going: "The weather sucks in TX," "There's nothing out there... it's all flat lands," "They get tornados," "You can't get healthy food at restaurants," "It is SO right wing," etc. etc.
 
You know, not once since I've been here have I ever given much thought to the weather, even during the summer. The geography hasn't really bothered me... though I do miss being in driving distance of the ocean. I've managed to find reasonably what passes for california cuisine, and I've not thought too much about being more or less a democrat in a very pro-republican environment.
 
But damn, it does strike me daily how many people I had back home that I really miss. Enough that I'm now really giving thought to closing up shop here, selling or renting the beautiful home I got, and heading back to my -real- home...

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
Thanks for the rep, JAGN... To honor your favorite ranking officer from UNIT, I offer these great quotes from Brigadier Alistair Gordon Lethbridge-Stewart.
 
Who, now that I think about it, would make a great NPC in a military based Champions game...
 
 
Brigadier: [on the superpowers of Russia, the U.S., and China giving their nuclear missile codes to a neutral power] Naturally enough, the only country that could be trusted with such a role was Great Britain.
The Doctor: Naturally. I mean, the rest were all foreigners.
 
Brigadier: [on the Doctor] As long as he does the job, he can wear what face he likes.
 
Brigadier: Most of their work's so secret, they don't know what they're doing themselves.
 
Brigadier: A dream? Really, Doctor. You'll be consulting the entrails of a sheep next.
 
Brigadier: In the last decade, we've been sending probes deeper and deeper into space. We've drawn attention to ourselves, Miss Shaw.
 
Brigadier: [ordering his men to fire on a monster] Chap with the wings - five rounds, rapid.
 
Brigadier: You've been agitating for a new assistant ever since Miss Shaw went back to Cambridge.
The Doctor: Liz was a highly-qualified scientist. I want someone with the same qualifications.
Brigadier: Nonsense. What you need, Doctor, as Miss Shaw has so often remarked, is someone to pass you your test tubes and to tell you how brilliant you are. Miss Grant will fulfill that function admirably.
 
 
Cheers,
Michelle
aka
Samuraiko

Re: Answers & Questions
 

Q: What do you plan on doing with the bodies of all those guys who got run over trying to get into Ninja School?
 
A: The Celtic Iron Right Cross

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 

cricket is for lesbians (no offense Kara/Rachel) and drag Queens (No offense Zornwil)

Re: Answers & Questions
 

Q. What excuse is given by new posters to the Heroboards for staying away from the NGD forum ?
 
A. A cop on the edge, a woman with a dark secret and a duck with a serious attitude problem.

Re: Superhero Images
 
I've been lurking here on Hero for a while. Finally, I'd like to introduce myself and put forward a few images of my own.
 
Enjoy!
 
- GA
 
Space conservation has forced me to take these pics down. sorry.

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 
Inspired by one of the last pictures on another thread and the Fast Show I submit this.
 
Me ?
Mightybec ?
The ex-President of the NGD forum, here ?
On an aircraft carrier, the Nimitz, in the middle of the Pacific
amongst sleeping sailors.
with my reputation ?
what were they thinking of ?
oh well, tally ho !

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 

Re: Answers & Questions
 

 
 
Q. Tell me again why you told John Holmes the party was cancelled?
 
A. Throw me the lemur, I'll throw you the whip!

Re: Answers & Questions
 
Q: Why is William Shatner laid out on the bar floor?
 
A: And that's how I won the battle with the forces of Ignorance!

Re: Answers & Questions
 

Q: Okay, I can understand if you were driving slowly on the right side of the road, you'd get hit by speeding cars trying to pass you, and if you drove down the left side of the road, you'd get hit by oncoming traffic, but how did you get hit by two cars simultaneously from different directions?
 
A: They said it was time for death tribble to choose a mate.

Re: Storn's Art & Characters thread.
 
There now follows a LOT of information on the Demoness. So if you don't want to read it go the next post. She was one of my signature characters of the Protectors (GB) campaign which began in 1984. This is highly detailed and mayhaps boring to some but is the character history.
 
The Demoness
 
Aka Cosmic Girl, Hospitalier.
 
Real Name. Caroline Turner. Carol for short.
 
Age. 36
 
Nationality: British
 
Height 5' 7½" Weight (You never ask a woman her weight)
 
Hair: Light brown with red tints or all red (scarlet)
 
Eyes: Brown with red tinge or completely red w/no pupil
 
Appearance: The Demoness is an attractive woman of medium height with brown hair and eyes flecked with scarlet. She can however appear with scarlet red hair and red eyes with no visible pupil. She tends toward simple dresses and now favours dark colours particularly with the Hospitalier cross an organisation of which she is now a member. Her smile is often wintery towards the criminal element and those she dislikes.
 
Personality: Calm and controlled except when she flies off into a rage or is being dominated by the demonic portion of her soul. She despises people who kill and uses her soul touch to make them suffer. Her true hatred is for those who use the dark arts like the Pentacle (homebrew organisation), Demon and Nightmare (homebrew villain who sold her soul and is thus immune to the Demoness's soul touch). She is devoted to her friends and her children.
 
Background: Carol was never going to have an easy life. Her grandfather schemed to create a vessel capable of handling powerful magics and thus enchanted his own son and his daughter in law prior to Carol's birth. After Carol's birth her grandfather finished the final enchantment so the infant child would grow into a power to be reckoned with in the mystical world. All that was needed now was a lifetime of indoctrination into the occult and service to the powers of evil.
Unfortunately her parents were not happy with this design for their daughter's life and so took her and fled. They spent the next decade and a bit on the run from the various Covens who wanted their child as a pawn in their power games. Finally their luck ran out and they were recaptured. Carol saw both her mother and father killed during a satanic orgy. She escaped as those who should have been guarding her were caught up in the ceremony. Drawn to the Lake District she came to the attention of the Magician's mentor and thus sanctuary. The Magician had returned to the world of Superheroing with the advent of the formation of the Protectors (GB) in late 1984.
The Magician took her on as a disciple teaching her the principles and practices of magic whilst also drawing her out of her shell. Her fugitive lifestyle had left her no time to make friends although her mother and father had schooled her as best they could in educational subjects and the school of life.
Carol became enamoured of the Avenger who was just a normal man and Crimebuster who she could tell was dieing. She assisted on some cases acquiring the name Cosmic Girl when she asked team mates for a suitable name.
The settled lifestyle could not last long as the Protectors headed into space on a quest to stop the Destroyer from returning and taking all life with him. Carol was abducted whilst trying to get to the Lake District and held captive by the newly formed Pentacle headed by the Warlock one of the Protectors' archfoes. They were assisted by Kordos a powerful wizard and foe of the Magician. She was tortured physically and mentally and her soul was bonded with that of a demon. This left a demon with a partly human soul in its body and Carol with a partly demonic soul in hers.
Two major events also happened that would shape her future. The Magician had to give his life in order to stop a mystical menace breaking into the earth dimension using the Destroyer as cover, and the Avenger murdered the Cobra who had in turn previously been responsible for the deaths of his parents. The Pentacle tortured her with these snippets of information but she steadfastly refused to believe both.
When the Protectors returned they managed an attack on the Pentacle's base. In the chaos they recovered the demon with Carol's soul whilst Carol herself managed to slip away in the confusion. She was unaware of the Protectors attempted rescue. And so tried returning to London. Despite their efforts the Demon with the part human soul died. The Magician was also able to return to life as well. However there was little he could do to restore the Demon to life or return Carol's soul to normal. Reaching London Carol was reunited with The Magician but found to her dismay that the reports of the Avenger were true. She was heart broken. The team was hunting him down but had little success, which was due in part to some of the team covertly aiding him.
Carol felt that she could no longer use the team Cosmic Girl. She now projected an aura of evil so she chose the name The Demoness after reading some of Batman's origin and methods. This did not sit well with some of the others and her relationships with some of them went into free fall. Principally these included Wolfclaw (Wolverine clone) whose 'kill first if they hate mutants' attitude angered her and Crimebuster whose laissez faire attitude and support of the Avenger soured their relationship. Some of her senses had been heightened by her ordeal so that she could now see clearly a person's soul. In turn this made her judgemental of certain people Wolfclaw especially.
She would also become enraged and armour piercing bolts of energy would come from her eyes.
 
While recovering she also met a new recruit to the Protectors, The Great Alfonso whose mentor was the Magnetic Mistress, a reformed criminal. She fell in love and they became intimate. Neither knew at the time that Kordos had implanted a subliminal suggestion in both. However she did become pregnant. Tragically Alfonso was killed by Master Spite a member of the Pentacle and formally Arsenic of the Chemical Compound. As Arsenic he had once wounded the Magnetic Mistress and so had been obliterated by Alfonso who flew into an enraged state as a result. Carol was able to hide her condition but did confide in the Magnetic Mistress that she was carrying Alfonso's child.
 
This became public when the Voidwalker pushed through a 'No Secrecy' rule to the Protector's charter. The Magnetic Mistress felt she had to divulge the truth but the Demoness reserved her anger for the Voidwalker. The amendment had been specifically targeted at the Magician and this was enough to set her against the alien Protector. Especially later when the Voidwalker kept secret from his team mates the induction of planet Earth into the Galactic Council.
 
Carol gave birth to a baby boy who she named Alfonso after his father. He showed no signs of superpowers or any defects and has done to this day. However his mother had to put up with continued speculation that The Magician was the father.
 
Carol knuckled down to becoming a full time Protector whilst rearing her son. The Magician was dismissed from the Protectors after killing Dr Magic in a duel after the latter murdered The Magician's assistants. As one of the ones who sat in judgement of the case was the Voidwalker it did harden her attitude towards him.
 
Tragedy still dogged her as the Magnetic Mistress was later killed by a villain called Kaotik. Carol had lost the one person who could tell her son what his father was really like. And then Morgan Le Fey caught her.
 
Le Fey crafted a soul construct which set the Demoness into a pure demon from with wings and claws but governed by a servant of hers whose soul provided the glue that held it together. Le Fey had her new servant kill people until the Protectors were able to free Carol with an unexpected ally. Her mother.
 
Her mother had been expelled from Hell as a consequence of the use of a wish device. It had caused other problems as well but this one benefited the Protectors. She first came to the attention of the team after Nightraven stopped a mugger from assaulting her. Having neither memory nor grasp of what had happened to her child since her death she attempted to enlist his aid in tracking Carol down. This was helped by the fact that she was dead and had the lack of pulse and stab wound to prove it and little Alfonso's resemblance to her. The Protectors were thus able to go on the offensive for a change although they were kept at bay by Le Fey and her minions. The shock of seeing her mother broke Le Fey's control and the construct was destroyed. Le Fey got away. Carol spent some considerable time recuperating partly due to the psychic shocks of being reunited with her mother and of killing people.
 
Returning to service the Demoness balanced bringing up her child, performing her duty as a Protector and educating herself. She had healing abilities and so tried to amalgamate this with medicinal knowledge in order to help people without resort to magic.
 
Controversy still dogged her. Particularly when she became pregnant again this time with quads at the hands of Foil, the greatest swordsman in the world. Foil was not actually the father but neither Carol nor the real father could come clean about it due the dangers it would pose to them. The real father was Dr Density the leader of the North East Protectors based in Newcastle. After the Fearmaster broke him, the Demoness went into his mind and brought him back. The two had a tentative tryst which resulted in Carol's second pregnancy. Despite Dr Density's wish 'to do the right thing' which required no prompting at all, Carol felt she had to turn him down as the kids would be used as a weapon against him. He was (and still is) viewed as one of the best of the Protectors and indeed superheroes all over the world. Step forward Foil. Although an 'enemy' of the team he claimed to be the father which explained why Carol could not say anything. The fact that he was more adventurer than the usual gallery of homicidal maniacs the team usually fought was the reason Carol's sight had not clued her in. This glib explanation has stood the test of time although it has made visiting rights for both fathers interesting. Two of the children have highly visible powers. One is a water breather who looks more lizard than human and another is a pyrokinetic.
 
Carol also became deputy team leader of the main London team and then leader after Crimebuster had to step down. Finally she was able to implement some plans of her own. She had become sick and tired of an attitude that prevailed which said that 'only those being hunted could go after their hunters'. Thus for example the Mutants could go after Genocide and X-Terminate but no-one else could. She felt this was rubbish. The team had banded together to get her free why not really go after those that were hunting them ? Although unpopular as an ideal to some of the team she got her way and it was successful winning grudging support from the naysayers.
 
Cobra had reconstituted at this time and the Protectors had particular reason to go after them. Boa, one of the second wave of members to the team, had been brainwashed and had gone off with them. Her husband, Moonlight Shadow, searched all over the world for her in a solo quest. Carol and the other members of the team were able to help by staging attacks on Cobra outposts worldwide whilst he and the Demoness broke into one of the main bases in Canada and abducted Boa. They were then able to restore her to normal.
 
The Magician was able to return to the Protectors and was also to marry but was assassinated (with his wife) in 1997 just after the election. The Demoness was distraught. Within a week the Unicorn was also dead after unbelieveably falling off a tower block. A friend of the Magician and close to many of the Protectors it proved a final breaking point. Particularly when the Avenger returned as well.
 
At The Magician's funeral Carol refused point blank to allow the Voidwalker to be present. She also sided with the Flame when Crimebuster insisted that he and he alone avenge the Unicorn and when the Flame insisted that the only way that the Avenger would return was over his 'dead body'. The Flame maintained that the Avenger had betrayed the team and his own code by murdering the Cobra who had been defeated and rendered into a vegetive state. Reading his soul and remembering her own bitterness the Demoness backed the Flame. Despite the fact the Avenger had served time in prison for the crime he had not faced discipline from his team mates (some of whom like Crimebuster and Moonlight Shadow kept his whereabouts secret). It resulted in a fight between the two during which the Flame burned the Avenger. Carol chose not to aid him as he felt no guilt at the murder of the Cobra.
 
The team split with some of the martial artists and others leaving. These also included people who Carol did not get on with so she happily stayed.
 
As the Millennium approached attempts were made by some of the occult organisations and by demons to kill the Pope. Carol was involved in thwarting a few of these but it culminated in a battle in Vatican City which almost killed her. The end result of these exertions saw her given special Papal status and an invite to join the Hospitalier organisation.
 
These days she still fights crime and lives off base in a Gothic mansion in London with her mother and her brood.
 
Due to her partly demonic nature Carol is unsuitable as Earth's archmage. She prefers to go after anyone who is a threat from people like Dr Destroyer to the Monster. No crime is too small, no threat to large to escape her notice.
Most of the magic community steer clear of her. She despises most of the Vandaleur clan including Adrian who tried to seduce Energiser (another Protector and friend of The Magican), and also tried to hit on her.

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 
Bubba was bragging to his boss one day, "You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them."
 
Tired of his boasting, his boss called his bluff, "OK, Bubba how about Tom Cruise?" "Sure, yes, Tom and I are old friends, and I can prove it."
 
So Bubba and his boss fly out to Hollywood and knock on Tom Cruise's door, and sure enough, Tom Cruise, shouts, "Bubba! Great to see you! You and your friend come right in and join me for lunch!" Although impressed, Bubba's boss is still skeptical. After they leave Cruise's house, he tells Bubba that he thinks Bubba's knowing Cruise was just lucky.
 
"No, no, just name anyone else," Bubba says. "President Bush," his boss quickly retorts. "Yes," Bubba says, "I know him, let's fly out to Washington." And off they go. At the White House, Bush spots Bubba on the tour and motions him and his boss over, saying, "Bubba, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in and let's have a cup of coffee first and catch up."
 
Well, the boss is very shaken by now, but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White House grounds, he expresses his doubts to Bubba, who again implores him to name anyone else.
 
"The Pope," his boss replies. "Sure!" says Bubba. "My folks are from Poland, and I've known the Pope a long time." Off they fly to Rome. Bubba and his boss are assembled with the masses in Vatican Square when Bubba says, "This will never work. I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope."
 
Bubba disappears into the crowd headed toward the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Bubba emerges with the Pope on the balcony. By the time Bubba returns, he finds that his boss has had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics. Working his way to his boss' side, Bubba asks him, "What happened?"
 
His boss looks up and says, "I was doing fine until you and the Pope came out on the balcony and the man next to me said, " Who's that on the balcony with Bubba?

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...
 
Cascade, a brick made of hardened water, snuck into an enemy base through the pipes, coming up through the toilet just as an agent was unzipping his fly and preparing to do his business. He one-punched the guard.
 
Other player: "Hey, Cascade cold-cocked him."

Re: Answers & Questions
 

Re: A Thread for Random Musings
 
I heard this on the radio this morning, as sung by Niel Young.
 
BLOWING IN THE WIND
Bob Dylan
 
How many roads must a man walk down
Before you call him a man
How many seas must a white dove sail
Before she sleeps in the sand
How many times must the cannonballs fly
Before they are forever banned
The answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind
The answer is blowing in the wind
 
How many years can a mountain exist
Before it is washed to the sea
How many years can some people exist
Before they're allowed to be free
How many times can a man turn his head
And pretend that he just doesn't see
The answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind
The answer is blowing in the wind
 
How many times must a man look up
Before he can see the sky
How many ears must one man have
Before he can hear people cry
How many deaths will it take till he knows
That too many people have died
The answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind
The answer is blowing in the wind

Re: Longest Running Thread EVER
 
:D :D
 
I am a senior citizen.
 
During the Clinton Administration I had an extremely good and well paying job.
 
I took numerous vacations and had several vacation homes.
 
Since President Bush took office, I have watched my entire life change for the worse.
 
I lost my job.
 
I lost my two sons in that terrible Iraqi War.
 
I lost my homes.
 
I lost my health insurance.
 
As a matter of fact I lost virtually everything and became homeless.
 
Adding insult to injury, when the authorities found me living like an animal, instead of helping me, they arrested me.
 
I will do anything that Senator Kerry wants to insure that a Democrat is back in the White House come next year.
 
Bush has to go.
 
Sincerely,
 
Saddam Hussein
 
 

Re: Musings on Random Musings
 
I'm your top prime cut of meat, I'm your choice
I wanna be elected
I'm your yankee doodle dandy in a gold Rolls Royce
I wanna be elected
 
Kids want a savior, don't need a fake
I wanna be elected
We're gonna rock to the rules that I make
I wanna be elected,
elected,
elected
 
I never lied to you, I've always been cool
I wanna be elected
I gotta get the vote, and I told you about school
I wanna be elected,
elected,
elected
Hallelujah, I wanna be elected
 
 
Everyone in the United States of America
We're gonna win this one, take the country by storm
We're gonna be elected
You and me together, young and strong
We're gonna be elected,
elected,
elected
Respected,
selected,
call collected
I wanna be elected, elected!
 
Alice Cooper- Elected (Billion Dollar Babies, released in 1973)
 
Got it right this time.
 
Mags

Re: Answers & Questions
 

Q. What is the new dress code for the Governor's mansion in California ?
 
A. Egads ! White Heat has unleashed the Ninja Penguins !

Re: Answers & Questions
 

Q. What compliment do scientists use to assess a woman's beauty but is actually a chat up line for them ?
 
A. The right to bear legs

Re: Storn's Art & Characters thread.
 
Another pic from my patron extraordinaire, Death Tribble. Here is Capricorn.