Pariah

They were sharp enough to stab another hole in the sky Hard enough to make the brightest diamond sigh Faster than the rockets on the Fourth of July Strong and cruel enough to make a statue of Mary cry

We have a Marie Osmond sighting! Excellent!

I've been around for you Been up and down for you But I just can't get any relief I've swallowed my pride for you Lived and lied for you But you still make me feel like a thief You've got me stealing your love away 'Cause you never give it Peeling the years away And we can't relive it Oh, I make you laugh And you make me cry I believe it's time for me to fly

Romp-bomp-a-chomp!

Not for all the tea in China.

Involving necromancy?

New Topic: Songs with Flowers

Q: What's the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

That would be creepy, wouldn't it?

Q - There are now more insane asylums than nursing homes in this country. What the [redacted] happened?! A - We're the best [censored] unit in the whole [unprintable] army!

So is blackjack.

There are times--many times, in fact--that I wish the iPad were more like an actual computer.

I asked her to marry me She smiled and pulled out a knife

Me and Earl was haulin' chickens on a flatbed out of Wiggins And we'd spent all night on the uphill side Of thirty-seven miles of Hell called Wolf Creek Pass Which is up on the Great Divide

That night The double-crosser got it right Pretending he was really dim He slipped to Sam a double gin (Mickey Finn)

And the meek shall inherit the Earth....

Which Lo Pan? Little old basket case on wheels or the ten foot tall roadblock?

Spock's Beard

Why not Foxbat?

You've been schooled, boy Had aggression in large amounts Just be truthful Man, it's everything that counts There is no hand waiting that must be paid We will leave our encores all unplayed At the end of the day

Met the ghost of Stephen Foster at the Hotel Paradise This is what I told him as I gazed into his eyes: Ships were made for sinking Whiskey made for drinking If we were made of cellophane We'd all get sinking drunk much faster! Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Here's a warning for all of you swingers Some advice from an average guy If you're seeing a dame who won't give you her name And she can't look you straight in the eye She could be a spy She's a suspect if there ever was one It seems that she's living a lie She gives you a wink as she pours you a drink And she smiles as she straightens your tie She could be a spy Maybe she's packing some heat in her pocket Or slipping some stuff in your wine She's starting right at the electrical socket Waiting for some kind of sign AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Lined up behind you They follow you, though you cannot lead I watch and marvel You push the blade 'till you see us bleed

You're talking about my toes and the hope chest, right?

Another trio: #1: "Alcohol" by Brad Paisley https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q3zkkLckeyM #2: "A Boy Named Sue" by Johnny Cash https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WOHPuY88Ry4 #3: "Friends in Low Places" by Garth Brooks https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mvCgSqPZ4EM