FrankL

My eyes! Wherein did I leave the brain bleach! Aargh!

Maybe they should start with poodles then work up to monkeys.

Spicy! Spicy! Spicy! I like a little heat with some of my food, but I eat it for the taste. I don't eat it as an assault on my taste buds.

Cool! My eldest has already started planning his Honor GMA (equivalent to an Eagle Scout).

And this morning, the last $11 per boy was covered. God is good!

The church is starting Royal Rangers, a boys club. Even as we've tried to cut the startup costs for new members (poor community), the numbers were still prohibitive. If we went with the cheap uniform, it was still close to $45 per boy. For the full utility uniform, add $25 to that number. Today, an anonymous donor told us he would pay $34 per boy and for the three leaders' uniforms we needed. We were stunned. God is good!

Well, yesterday started well and ended with us squeegeeing water from the basement again. But I did have some time to think about my band for Superdraft: The Musical. Be afraid. Be very afraid. Then this morning I got an email that The Untold Podcast wants to produce one of my short stories as a dramatic reading! "Sixes Wild," set in the same fictional universe as Joshua's Pawn Shop and sharing Lou's Bar & Grill with "Crazy Moon," will be streamed! I don't know the date of the broadcast, but I'll keep you informed. (Now I need to finish its cover and upload it.) Also in writing news, I'm starting procedures with Amazon to get my first book back to my account since the publisher folded and has left it under his account. Looking for a relaxing night on the town, four poker buddies unknowingly play cards with the Devil, but when he plays, all deals are off.

My wife bought a new blender called a Ninja. Me: If you put bananas and peaches in it, would it be a "Fruit Ninja." She actually laughed at a pun! Took me 15 years to get that reaction from her!

The front porch needed painting, so I took the boys out there one morning and we started scraping. I found some of the wood was rotten. The more I looked, the more I found. I wound up taking apart the entire front porch and last night, my father-in-law and I got it all back together. Besides the slats, only 4 pieces of wood were from the original. Now I need to prime the new wood, paint it all, and seal it against the weather. Wait. Shouldn't this be in the cranky thread? Nope. I felt fantastic looking at it all put together again. And I mowed the yard last night. The weather prevented that for an entire week then working on the porch stopped it this week. It was looking bad. Now, it looks good. And I'm sure the neighbor's happy. He's trying to sell his house, and our yard being badly in need of a mow doesn't help that any.

I like all the individual pieces (the cornbread must not have sugar in it, though), but together. There are things that are just wrong. This is one of them.

Flashbeagle Gordon

My five-year-old will not work solar system puzzles that don't include Pluto as a planet. I kid you not.

I read once about a Georgia bar without a sign. The regulars called it the "No Name Beerjoint" and the owner wouldn't tell what the official name was. That added to the 'ambiance" and "mystique." The reason I mention this here is that the joint had a raccoon for a regular. About the same time every night, it would come in through an open window (or scratch at the door until let in). The patrons would put a little beer in ash trays and let him drink. About half drunk, that was one mean coon!

Including the cake.

My plan is to hold off as long as I can. I'm on Win8 and spent time getting used to its quirks. I have a couple of programs that might not function correctly in the upgrade (Delphi 2009 for one). My wife has a Win7 machine that she likes and doesn't want to jump to 10 either. I rode my WinXP machine for 7 years until it died. I wish I had replaced it just a tad sooner as I wanted a Win7 instead of Win8, but 7 was actually going to cost more by that point.

Then I want Captain Batmerica.

In a book I'm reading: "I'm a Libra. We don't believe in astrology."

And the tequila worm just went to a whole new level.

I think it means that they sit out the remainder of this week and the next week after the tragic loss. But I could be wrong.

That's about as funny as a screen door on a battleship.

Pope Francis decided to take a trip to the United States. Once he got there, the archbishop of New York had a limousine waiting for him. While they were driving, Francis struck up a conversation with the driver. "My son, are you Catholic?" "Yes, your Holiness. The cardinal wouldn't have sent me otherwise." "Good, good." They chatted for several miles, and then Francis looked at the clock on the car dash. "My son, we are running late. Can you speed up?" "Oh, your Holiness, I'm on probation already. If I get caught speeding again, I'll lose my license and my job!" Francis sat back. "We certainly can't have that. Let me drive." The driver was stunned but acquiesced. The Pope put the petal to the metal and roared down the road. Sure enough, they were stopped by a police officer a few miles down the road. The cop walked up to the car and tapped on the window. "License and registr..." He stopped as soon as he saw Francis in the driver's seat. "Okay, just drive on, but be careful." Back in the police car, the officer's partner asked, "Why'd you let him go?" "He was important." "The governor?" "Higher. And think religion." "The President?" "Higher." "Billie Graham?" "No. Honestly, I don't know who he was, but he must be important because the Pope's his chauffeur!"

I saw that coming. Or maybe it was going. I can never tell.

Mr. Log was left wooden-faced after the party.

Bolt would investigate. While he's working that angle, Null Space (a teleporter) would pop close to the firework in question and be ready to take it away from innocents if the investigation turns up anything.

Two items: 1) On Saturday I took my sons to the Family Fun Fair at a local park. The local radio station had a van there to play (not transmitting, just playing for the crowd). When we got there, the song was "I Feel Like Making Love." I thought, "That's Hercules theme song from the Arena draft. Oh, this would be a terrible arena for next season! A small park with families. And Hercules in one of his trademark fights where no one loses." 2) I was reading a posted vignette this morning. It was over the top humor with an evil army facing down one described as "vile." The vile was besieging the evil empire's headquarters. One of the commentors said, "The vile army's Dark Lord needs to be standing on a hill of skulls, sipping a fruity drink." Another replied: "Just a hill of skulls?" Original: "Of course. Because a mountain of skulls would just be gauche."