Old Man Posted September 29, 2010 Report Share Posted September 29, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Did tkd just show us his "oh" face? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted September 29, 2010 Report Share Posted September 29, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Oh! I forgot about that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted September 29, 2010 Report Share Posted September 29, 2010 Re: The cranky thread I want the ability to make people spontaneously combust. Edit: With Invisible Power Effects, of course, so I can act just as shocked as everyone else. Sometimes that combustion thing isn't convenient: in a library, in close quarters (like in the same elevator I'm in), at the gas station, in line in some government or campus building where the smoke detectors will chase everyone out and prevent you from getting done what you want to do, etc.; places like that. So I want teleport-in-on-demand swarms of crazed starving hyenas that will devour the target, including bones and small metal objects, in about 20 agonizing seconds and then teleport away leaving a few blood spots and shreds of clothing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teh bunneh Posted September 29, 2010 Report Share Posted September 29, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Sometimes that combustion thing isn't convenient: in a library' date=' in close quarters (like in the same elevator I'm in), at the gas station, in line in some government or campus building where the smoke detectors will chase everyone out and prevent you from getting done what you want to do, etc.; places like that. So I want teleport-in-on-demand swarms of crazed starving hyenas that will devour the target, including bones and small metal objects, in about 20 agonizing seconds and then teleport away leaving a few blood spots and shreds of clothing.[/quote'] Reminds me of one of my favorite jokes... One day, a young man rummaging through an old crate of junk discovers an old, dusty lamp. With his shirt, he rubs some of the dust off and *POOF*! Suddenly a tiny, adorable little bunny rabbit is standing before him. "What are you supposed to be?" the man asks, amazed. "I'm a devilbunny," the rabbit answers. "I was kinda hoping for a genie," the man says, disappointed. "I'm better than any genie," the rabbit says. "I'll destroy anything you want me to. Just say my name and the object you want destroyed, and it's toast." "No way," the man says, disbelieving. "Try me," the devilbunny says. "OK," the guy looks around. "Devilbunny, this old Danielle Steele book." Before he can even finish saying it, the bunny leaps into the air and turns into a whirling buzzsaw of fury. In less than a second, there is nothing left of the insipid book but a few fluttering scraps of paper. "Amazing!" the guy says, an idea forming in his mind. He picks up the bunny and goes to the parking lot outside his workplace. "Devilbunny, my manager's car!" he snickers. Once again, the bunny becomes a blur of violence. Moments later, the only thing left of the car is a lone tire, bouncing forelornly down the road. The dude's boss runs outside. "Holy $#!~! What the hell happened to my car?" The guy looks as innocent as possible. "It was the devilbunny," he says, pointing to the sweet little bunny innocently munching grass nearby. "Devilbunny?" the manager demands, incredulously. "Devilbunny, my ass!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted September 29, 2010 Report Share Posted September 29, 2010 Re: The cranky thread I take it that was your first job out of college? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted September 29, 2010 Report Share Posted September 29, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Gee...I "wonder" who that "devilbunneh" was... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted September 30, 2010 Report Share Posted September 30, 2010 Re: The cranky thread I am in a nice, quiet, air-conditioned Starbuck's, at a clean table near a power outlet. There are at least twelve other open laptops in here and about half of them are playing hulu or youtube. I am not getting any work done today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SatinKitty Posted September 30, 2010 Report Share Posted September 30, 2010 Re: The cranky thread I dunno, Old Man, last time it was Lesbians necking, this time noisy laptops ? Maybe you better find some place else to work because it doesn't sound like Starbuck's is doing it for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted September 30, 2010 Report Share Posted September 30, 2010 Re: The cranky thread It's not the noise, it's the bandwidth. I can't really manage the company infrastructure remotely when my bandwidth peaks at 13kB/sec. I can barely even post here. As for other places to work, I am open to suggestions. Note that my house is full of little kids and short-tempered wives. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archermoo Posted September 30, 2010 Report Share Posted September 30, 2010 Re: The cranky thread It's not the noise, it's the bandwidth. I can't really manage the company infrastructure remotely when my bandwidth peaks at 13kB/sec. I can barely even post here. As for other places to work, I am open to suggestions. Note that my house is full of little kids and short-tempered wives. That's the problem: You need to keep it to one wife. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted September 30, 2010 Report Share Posted September 30, 2010 Re: The cranky thread More than enough with one, I gather. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted September 30, 2010 Report Share Posted September 30, 2010 Re: The cranky thread That's the problem: You need to keep it to one wife. In retrospect, I should probably have kept it to less than that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted September 30, 2010 Report Share Posted September 30, 2010 Re: The cranky thread As for other places to work' date=' I am open to suggestions. Note that my house is full of little kids and short-tempered wives.[/quote'] Can you pretend to be an academic, pop down to the university campus, and mooch their wi-fi? It won't cut out the YouTubers, but universities tend to have fatter pipes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted September 30, 2010 Report Share Posted September 30, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Borders and Barnes & Nobles are decent with their wifi (at least the times I used them), but the B&N seems to have hidden their outlets last time I checked. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted September 30, 2010 Report Share Posted September 30, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Can you pretend to be an academic' date=' pop down to the university campus, and mooch their wi-fi? It won't cut out the YouTubers, but universities tend to have fatter pipes.[/quote'] That might work, except UH is legendary for its lack of parking. My last semester there, I would drive into the general neighborhood at about 5:30am to beat traffic, park on the side of the road, sleep another hour in the truck, and then walk about a mile to class. I'm at a different Starbuck's today. No lesbians and only one or two bandwidth hogs. I made the mistake of looking at the screen of the guy next to me; he's apparently some kind of racist lunatic with farsightedness serious enough that he has the font turned REALLY BIG SO THAT I CAN SEE HOW OFTEN HE USES THE N WORD WHICH IS ONE OR TWICE PER SENTENCE. From what I saw of the email he's composing, he's like TimeCube's bigoted cousin. There's a cop sitting in front of me. I hate being so close to cops because I always have this irrational urge to grab the guy's gun when he's not looking, or at least thumb the mag release. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SatinKitty Posted September 30, 2010 Report Share Posted September 30, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Nothing is getting done. I must be depressed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted October 1, 2010 Report Share Posted October 1, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Nothing is getting done on my end either. I must be enraged. Because it ain't my fault nothing is getting done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Old Man Posted October 1, 2010 Report Share Posted October 1, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Borders and Barnes & Nobles are decent with their wifi (at least the times I used them)' date=' but the B&N seems to have hidden their outlets last time I checked.[/quote'] B&N does hide their outlets now, and so does McDonald's. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted October 1, 2010 Report Share Posted October 1, 2010 Re: The cranky thread B&N does hide their outlets now' date=' and so does McDonald's.[/quote'] We should bring in our own generators. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teh bunneh Posted October 1, 2010 Report Share Posted October 1, 2010 Re: The cranky thread So, last night one of the neighborhood cats came up on our porch and was sitting on the windowsill outside. Our cats (both inside-only cats) saw it sitting out there and immediately moved to defend their turf... by fighting each other. My wife and I heard this yowling-screeching-hissing and ran downstairs to see what was up, and we find our two cats just tearing into each other, while the neighbor cat sat calmly on the windowsill watching. I chased off the other cat, but even that didn't calm our cats down. We had to seperate them; they were still growling and hissing at each other two hours later. We were like, "WTF, cats? You two are friends -- shouldn't you be teaming up to scare the invader away, rather than tearing into each other?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrosshairCollie Posted October 1, 2010 Report Share Posted October 1, 2010 Re: The cranky thread I hate it when I lie down for a late afternoon nap, which turns into a full-on sleep, meaning I'm wade awake at some unholy pre-dawn hour. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted October 1, 2010 Report Share Posted October 1, 2010 Re: The cranky thread So, last night one of the neighborhood cats came up on our porch and was sitting on the windowsill outside. Our cats (both inside-only cats) saw it sitting out there and immediately moved to defend their turf... by fighting each other. My wife and I heard this yowling-screeching-hissing and ran downstairs to see what was up, and we find our two cats just tearing into each other, while the neighbor cat sat calmly on the windowsill watching. I chased off the other cat, but even that didn't calm our cats down. We had to seperate them; they were still growling and hissing at each other two hours later. We were like, "WTF, cats? You two are friends -- shouldn't you be teaming up to scare the invader away, rather than tearing into each other?" "We were fighting to determine who had the honor of running off the invader. You've ruined everything!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted October 1, 2010 Report Share Posted October 1, 2010 Re: The cranky thread So, last night one of the neighborhood cats came up on our porch and was sitting on the windowsill outside. Our cats (both inside-only cats) saw it sitting out there and immediately moved to defend their turf... by fighting each other. My wife and I heard this yowling-screeching-hissing and ran downstairs to see what was up, and we find our two cats just tearing into each other, while the neighbor cat sat calmly on the windowsill watching. I chased off the other cat, but even that didn't calm our cats down. We had to seperate them; they were still growling and hissing at each other two hours later. We were like, "WTF, cats? You two are friends -- shouldn't you be teaming up to scare the invader away, rather than tearing into each other?" "Well, we can't get at the invader, so we'll fight each other." Classic misdirected aggression. They get riled up and can't get at the source... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CrosshairCollie Posted October 2, 2010 Report Share Posted October 2, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Completely exhausted for some reason, but not sleepy, so laying down won't help because I can't sleep. This sucks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted October 2, 2010 Report Share Posted October 2, 2010 Re: The cranky thread Completely exhausted for some reason, but not sleepy, so laying down won't help because I can't sleep. This sucks. Sounds like your body's tired, but not your brain. Try doing algebra for a while. Could be the other way around, in which case, do some exercise. The point is to lower the energy of one to match the other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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