DocMan Posted February 17, 2004 Report Share Posted February 17, 2004 Originally posted by lemming A: I shouldn't of drunk all the tea in China. Q: Why do you squish when you walk? A: I got y'er peg leg right here! Doc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 17, 2004 Report Share Posted February 17, 2004 Originally posted by DocMan Q: Why do you squish when you walk? A: I got y'er peg leg right here! Q: Hmm, I got the parrot, the hat, and a cutlass. I need something else to complete my costume. A: Tepid Tangerine Tea Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocMan Posted February 17, 2004 Report Share Posted February 17, 2004 Originally posted by lemming A: Tepid Tangerine Tea Q: Yuck! I thought this was iced coffee. What is this? A: Articles of war be damned! I said load the trebuchet with lawyers! Doc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 17, 2004 Report Share Posted February 17, 2004 Originally posted by DocMan A: Articles of war be damned! I said load the trebuchet with lawyers! Q: Sir! We can't shoot those over the wall. That would be too cruel to the enemy. A: Somebody must be trying to tell me something. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocMan Posted February 17, 2004 Report Share Posted February 17, 2004 Originally posted by lemming A: Somebody must be trying to tell me something. Q: Sir, we can't process that form here. You're in the wrong line. You need to take these forms to the room at the end of the hall. Sir? You're in the wrong line. Go to the end of the hall. Hello? You're in the wrong line! Go to the end of the hall! Sir? Sir!?! Are you listening? A: If we took the bones out, it wouldn't be crunchy. Doc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 17, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2004 Originally posted by DocMan A: If we took the bones out, it wouldn't be crunchy. Q: Don't you dragons ever take the bones out of the elves before eating them? A: Here comes another one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hermit Posted February 17, 2004 Report Share Posted February 17, 2004 Originally posted by Klytus Q: Don't you dragons ever take the bones out of the elves before eating them? A: Here comes another one. Q: You never should have taken those fertility drugs, what's that, the fourth kid in five minutes... oh man, DUCK! A: I find it rude, crude, ammoral... and desperately wish I'd thought of it first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 17, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 17, 2004 Originally posted by Hermit A: I find it rude, crude, ammoral... and desperately wish I'd thought of it first. Q: What do you say about a dude who went into government, re-wrote all the rules for corporate behavior, left govt., went and became a CEO, made millions, then re-joined the govt. to make sure all of his past deeds were retroactively legal. A: A fox, a box and the Sox. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 18, 2004 Report Share Posted February 18, 2004 Q: How do you know Boston still suffers from it's baseball curse? A: Long, black and Pendulant. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Worldmaker Posted February 18, 2004 Report Share Posted February 18, 2004 Originally posted by Tim A: Long, black and Pendulant. Q. On job applications, what does Long Dong Silver put in the space marked "Do you have any other qualities that might qualify you for this position?" A. You know, after the sixth time I got struck by lightning, I knew something was wrong. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 18, 2004 Report Share Posted February 18, 2004 Q: Why is all the metal utensils sticking to you? A: First I go to the left, then I go to the right, then I just wander around in circles. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Worldmaker Posted February 18, 2004 Report Share Posted February 18, 2004 Originally posted by Tim A: First I go to the left, then I go to the right, then I just wander around in circles. Q. President Clinton, what's your plan for foreign policy? A. He was dead just long enough for the murder rap to blow over. And then he had lunch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Javed Posted February 18, 2004 Report Share Posted February 18, 2004 Originally posted by Worldmaker Q. President Clinton, what's your plan for foreign policy? A. He was dead just long enough for the murder rap to blow over. And then he had lunch. Q: How did Dr. Doom escape prosecution this time? A: Six dollars for the goldfish, and one for the fruit bat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 19, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by Javed A: Six dollars for the goldfish, and one for the fruit bat. Q: How did you spend your allowance? A: An oxymoron if ever there was one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by Klytus A: An oxymoron if ever there was one. Q: Let's rename all our Sale's Reps, Sale's Engineers! A: My tongue is tired. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mightybec Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by lemming Q: Let's rename all our Sale's Reps, Sale's Engineers! A: My tongue is tired. Q: Why are you taking so long, darling? A: It burns when I use the restroom. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enforcer84 Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by Mightybec Q: Why are you taking so long, darling? A: It burns when I use the restroom. Q) Firewing, why are you going to visit a doctor? A) I had to do it...for Janet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by Enforcer84 A) I had to do it...for Janet. Q: So what's with the piercing and no shirt? A: A fistful of euros Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rachel Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by lemming A: A fistful of euros Q: How much for that stick of gum? A: And that is why the economy sucks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by Rachel A: And that is why the economy sucks. Q: What's with the giant vacuum cleaner in washington? A: Two broken legs and a cold compress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Q: What will you get if you use your HMO for medical help? A: Slice then dice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Q: I don't want to chop the vegetables, I want to play Champions A: ribbit Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Q: I'm an agent for intergalactic peace. Here to grant your world the knowledge needed to solve your worst diseases. Can you take me to your leaders? A: You are too sloppy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted February 19, 2004 Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Q. Why are you so prejudiced against us Water Elementals ? A. DELETED BY MODERATOR Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 19, 2004 Author Report Share Posted February 19, 2004 Originally posted by death tribble A. DELETED BY MODERATOR Q: Tell me the best way to get the moderator's immediate attention on this forum. A: I've got a lovely terrier. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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