Pariah

A couple of my favorites: Iron Man: Billionaire playboy weaponsmith ends up on the wrong side of his own creation and is forced to invent a new technology to save his own life. He has a change of heart and realizes that he can also use that technology to fight the forces of evil. I love redemption stories. Beast: Born with physical gifts beyond the limits of normal human achievement, he uses his extensive knowledge of biochemistry to make himself even stronger, faster, and more agile. The fact that it turns him into a blue-furred monster hardly phases him at all. Captain Britain: Choose one of the following artifacts - the Sword of Might, or the Amulet of Right. Captain Britain proved he was worth of the title with his choice. And honestly, after the 90s, I'm pretty much a fan of any origin story other than "born a mutant".

Three words: Weather Girl Tiffany.

Is death really all that poetic?

Do you have a testable hypothesis? (Because if you don't, I'm going to mark down your grade.)

Q - They're picking up reruns of "Jersey Shore" on Dantooine? A - It's not as big a deal as you seem to think it is.

In the words of a wise old professor I once knew, "Lots and lots of booze." New Topic: Unusual business opportunities that have arisen due to the aforementioned recent cold weather.

He couldn't figure out how to tax them.

Is there another way?

Q - I can't tell if they're real or silicone. A - Better living through geology!

From direct current to alternating current?

The Oakland Raiders, obviously. Look at their fans, for cryin' out loud.

What's the guy's name on first?

"New rule: From now on, every team in the league must have at least two former members of the Dallas Cowboys playing at key positions."

Say what?

Q - What do you mean, Starbucks doesn't open for another half an hour? I need coffee NOW!! A - Fibbooonnnnnaaaaaaaaccccccccccccciiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii.

SPOON!!!

Have we all become symbol-minded?

Kind of like Congress.

Who's "the girl"?

"Well, you're all sinners anyway, so why don't you all take a little time and get it out of your system? Anything you want to do, as much as you want to do it, with no eternal repercussions. You have until Saturday at midnight. Go!" New Topic: Wallace and Gromit meet a certain group of superheroes. What happens?

Q - Should I have the dogs park their biplanes in that hangar over there? A - Now we know: Opossums make lousy test pilots.

"Wafers are out. Belgian waffles are in."

Sadly, I find most of Mel Brooks' stuff to be inane to the point of unwatchability.

Lies, all of it lies.

That's what we do here, is it not?