Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

[Mister E]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

In the new Ultimate Fantastic Four, Reed Richards asked Ben Grim about his new digestive processes, and Thing was like, "Don't Ask. You really don't wanna know."

 

And I was like, "Please tell me!" But, I got no answer...

[Red Knight]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

In the new Ultimate Fantastic Four, Reed Richards asked Ben Grim about his new digestive processes, and Thing was like, "Don't Ask. You really don't wanna know."

 

And I was like, "Please tell me!" But, I got no answer...

 

 

Some things are better when not discussed. Honestly, if you want to know.. In Superman II, the quest ofr disco-outfitted villians... Supes and Lois sleep together and she seems no less wprse for wear. I guess it just goes to show you that Supes can control himself.

[Agent 13]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

In reference to the narcissist Harlan Ellison

Who brought up Harlan Ellsion?

[shaunclinton]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

It's like breathing... Supes can do that normally, or he can do it super!

 

Super-Ejaculation: 12d6 Entangle, Area of Effect (Cone), Sticky, No Range, Entangle Has No DEF, Side Effect (Must get the 'Wee Fella' out in public, -1/4)

 

I know I shouldn't have.

[Agent 13]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

In Superman II' date=' the quest ofr disco-outfitted villians... Supes and Lois sleep together and she seems no less wprse for wear. I guess it just goes to show you that Supes can control himself.[/quote']

I thought it just went to show that he'd had his powers stripped away in the previous scene.

[Publius]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

Super-Ejaculation: 12d6 Entangle' date=' Area of Effect (Cone), Sticky, No Range, Entangle Has No DEF, Side Effect (Must get the 'Wee Fella' out in public, -1/4)[/quote']Dude, did you have to make it "sticky"?

 

eeeeeewwwww... mindscrub me now.

 

In all seriousess, there is an ihero story about this one, a damage-regenerating woman named Courtesan who has been around for a looong time and does the naughty boogie (for pay) with super-types that have these sorts of problems (i.e. the man of steel vs. woman of tissue, not "sticky"). Such a prostitute would be of great value I'd think (adventure ideas come from the oddest places...)

[Michael Hopcroft]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

Two words: kryptonite condom.

Not kryptonite (that would be poisonous, not to mention potentially carcinogenic, to a Kryptonian), but in the DC Universe STAR Labs probably helped the Kents develop a condom-suitable material that would take the force of -- well, you know -- without coming off or breaking. With proper care, the genetic material can then be collected for storage and later insemination should they desire to have a natural child (and possibly engineered slightly to ENABLE fertilization).

 

The other problem is solved either by Tantric muscle control or by avoiding penetration altogether.

[proditor]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

This whole thread reminds me of something on Surbrook's site...Just look under "Worst Hero Origins" for the guy whose name starts with "Captain" and who has a unique ranged attack, and you'll know what I'm talking about.

[input.jack]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

For those who wonder, Harlan Ellison wrote the original article "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex" to demonstrate how stupid those semi-illiterate comic book readers are for enjoying all that mindless, inane driven.

 

You know.

 

Us.

 

I rate it down in the sludge along with Phillip Jose Farmer's attempts to malign Tarzan by writing stories of him engaging in cannibalism and getting it on with female great apes as a teenager.

 

Some people cant be happy unless theyre tearing someone else's idols down.

[Michael Hopcroft]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

Who brought up Harlan Ellsion?

I don't know why Ellison was broguht up, unless he wrote a story about this subject. The poster may ahve meant Larry Niven, who wrote an essay on Sueprman's sexuality called "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex" that seems to have been read by everybody in fandom who does not write for Supermain in any of the official media.

 

The postulated theory was that Superman had numerous physical chaarcterstics that would kill a human sex partner.

 

DC did not read this apparently, as Clark Kent and Lois Lane have been married in the comics continuity for quite some time. There were such issues addressed in Lois & Clark, although I didn't see the episodes in question so I'm not sure how they were handled. The series ended with Lois and Clark having to raise an infant of uncertain origin -- apparently Superman's alien genetics prevented natural conception with Lois (either that or they were using the above-mentioned super-condoms).

 

As for other comic-book characters, fans have speculated that Reed and Sue Richards are a very hot couple. The combined erotic possibilties of total elatsiticyt of all body parts and the ability to create and control invisible force fields boggle the mind.

 

Peter Parker might have a less intense version of the Superman problem. other potential issues include force fields over which a character does not have very good control (making contact difficult), anything that is transmitted through the skin or by bodily fluids, or anything that affects body temperature in either direction. The Flash TV series made what at first appeared to be a joke reference to the harmful effects of superspeed on someone's sex life, but it turned out to be a boxing reference.

 

Another character who has a severe potential problem is Scott Summers, aka Cyclops. If whatever Ruby Quartz eyewear he is wearing gets knocked off in the heat of passion, he is in a world of trouble until he gets it back on.

[input.jack]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

That was Larry Niven? Huh...My bad. Sorry, Harlan

[Agent 13]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

For those who wonder' date=' Harlan Ellison wrote the original article "Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex" to demonstrate how stupid those semi-illiterate comic book readers are for enjoying all that mindless, inane driven.[/quote']

Ah, a Harlan Hater. Pity that Larry Niven wrote that essay, innit?

[Kristopher]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

Having actually read the Niven essay in question, it seems to me that it was written firmly tongue in cheek.

 

IIRC, Niven has enough regard for comics to have written a Green Lantern graphic novel...

[input.jack]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

I hated the article. I -liked- Ellisons work on

Babylon 5

[Agent 13]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

Having actually read the Niven essay in question, it seems to me that it was written firmly tongue in cheek.

 

IIRC, Niven has enough regard for comics to have written a Green Lantern graphic novel...

He plotted out Ganthet's Tale, yeah.

 

Harlan, however, has a much larger comics resume.

[Badger]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

Flash probably has it bad. The joke about it being too quick, really gets ridiculous with him. LOL.

 

I think most of the time it should just be written off. Except for the Rogue-type (and heck, there might be some "wierdos" who might enjoy the disadvantage)

 

Could have a plot seed with super-fetishes.

[Curufea]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

I really like "Niven's Rule" (which is don't stand next to the guy givin lip to the man with the gun - if you heavily paraphrase it ;-p)

 

Think Darwinian. How many generations have there been of superheroes? Is it a new concept - then there would be problems and accidents. If they've been around throughout history, then reproduction would have worked its way out by now (otherwise supers would have died out years ago).

[nexus]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

I really like "Niven's Rule" (which is don't stand next to the guy givin lip to the man with the gun - if you heavily paraphrase it ;-p)

 

Think Darwinian. How many generations have there been of superheroes? Is it a new concept - then there would be problems and accidents. If they've been around throughout history, then reproduction would have worked its way out by now (otherwise supers would have died out years ago).

 

Depends on if Superhumans are a race or random mutantion and/or latent genetic potential. Also not every superhuman (assuming random powers) is going to nessecarily have problems.

[James Gillen]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

In reference to the narcissist Harlan Ellison' date=' this is not a problem in game because nobody (except in some truly twisted game setting) spends the points to make their ejaculation an area effect, explosive killing attack. In the game you only have the powers you pay for, if your players are buying abilities like this without your encouragement, I suggest lowering the number of character points they have been given for making their characters.[/quote']

 

Actually it was Larry Niven who wrote Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex.

 

But you shouldn't NEED to buy Super-Explosive Ejaculate or anything like that, unless your Champions game is supposed to work like Penthouse Comix.

 

JG

[James Gillen]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

DC did not read this apparently, as Clark Kent and Lois Lane have been married in the comics continuity for quite some time. There were such issues addressed in Lois & Clark, although I didn't see the episodes in question so I'm not sure how they were handled. The series ended with Lois and Clark having to raise an infant of uncertain origin -- apparently Superman's alien genetics prevented natural conception with Lois (either that or they were using the above-mentioned super-condoms).

 

Whether Supes can have a child with an Earthling, we don't know yet. But I'd say if he can toss and turn in bed without breaking something (or Lois), and if he can look at something without burning it up with heat rays, I'd say he can control his powers enough to have sex.

 

JG

[Michael Hopcroft]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

Depends on if Superhumans are a race or random mutantion and/or latent genetic potential. Also not every superhuman (assuming random powers) is going to nessecarily have problems.

Which brings up the whole question of supers and children. Marvel took the approach that if two altered-huamn supers, two mutants, or any combiantion of the above had children, the children would be supers but their powers might not be at all realted to thsoe of the parents. Franklin Richards has neither stretching, invidibility or force fields, but he is a super.

 

Brad Bird also used that approach for the powers of the Parr children in The Incredibles. A brick and a stretcher have children, and they turn out to be an invisble force-field projecter, a speedster, and a metamorph.

 

Whether powers get passed on when only one parent is a super has been theorized in a few instances. In the alternative future universe of Spider-Girl, Peter Parker and MJ's daughter inherited her father's specific powers.

 

We have equivalent speculation in anime fandom -- not as often because very few anime characters have inborn superpowers, but it does happen. Charatcers who might well bear or sire childern with a normal human and who have superhuman natural (or endowed) abilities include (theoretically) Lum the Invader, Zelgadis Greywards, and the heroines of Tokyo Mew Mew. Apparently in the CLAMP universe magic potential runs along bloodlines (the Li are a partoicualrly powerful clan of mages, and anyone with any sort of a genetic tie to Clow Read or Yuuko would probably have great potential). The most notorious anime super of all, A-ko, inherited her powers, but they are not a direct carbon copy of the powers of her parents.

 

There is also a variant of the notorious "Pregannt Ranma Problem" which poses the question of whether a Jusenkyo curse can be passed on through inheritance. (The geenral belief is that no, you actually have to get dunked yourself).

[Iuz the Evil]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

Yeah, the 'Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex' essay is a funny read... and I am NOT going to point out again who wrote it.

 

One of my favorite parts of that one (if I remember correctly, it's been some years) is where he discusses mating with Supergirl, to 'keep the Kryptonian race going' or something like that. Then points out that Kara is his cousin (or was then, and is now again), and 'only a cad would suggest such a thing!'.

 

That was hysterical... definitely tongue in cheek there.

[Iuz the Evil]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

...oh yeah, and the blue-green radiation trails caused by Superman's FTL semen racing around the earth, unkillable save by kryptonite or magic.

[Mister E]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

Yeah' date=' the [i']'Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex' [/i] essay is a funny read... and I am NOT going to point out again who wrote it.

Can someone provide a link to this read?

[incrdbil]

Re: Person of Steel, Significant Other of Tissue paper

 

If the Kryptonite Hershy squirts don't shatter plumbing and create sonic booms, Supes is good to go.

 

I dion't recall Clark Kent ever accidentally shattering urinals, and that particular function isn't all that controllable once it starts.