phydaux Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 So we were talking yesterday, and we decided that without a doubt the world's greatest super villain is.... Florida Man !!! I mean seriously, look at the recent headlines from 2015 alone: January 2: Florida Man Covers Himself in Ashes, Says He's a 400-Year-Old Indian, Crashes Stolen Car January 5: Florida Man Puts Dragon Lizard in His Mouth, Smacks People with It January 27: Florida Man Steals $4,000 Worth of Chicken and Ribs February 3: Florida Man Who Had Sex with Dolphin Says It Seduced Him February 3: Florida Man Killed 5 Gators, Ate Them for Super Bowl Dinner February 15: Florida Man Believes Wrestling Event Is Haunted by the Ghost of Macho Man Randy Savage March 3: Florida Man Goes on LSD-Fueled Naked Rampage, Bites Girlfriend's Finger March 11: Drunk, Machete-Wielding Florida Man Chases Neighbor on Lawnmower March 11: Florida Man's Church Loses Tax-Exempt Status Because It's Just a Nightclub The list goes on and on. Foxbat's got NOTHING on Florida Man! And no super hero can stop him. There's only one possible response: So that got me thinking, who can do the best write up of Florida Man? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 I doubt it can be done, apart from maybe by a Lucius hopped up on experimental pharmaceuticals. GM Fiat -- Florida Man is a force of Nature! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hyper-Man Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 "You're despicable. This is preposthterousth-th!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubba smith Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 HEY I LIVE in Forida watch what you say Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 I doubt it can be done, apart from maybe by a Lucius hopped up on experimental pharmaceuticals. GM Fiat -- Florida Man is a force of Nature! Ha! What makes you think I am hoping for experiences with farm cuties? Uh...I mean, how do you propose to get me "hopped up on experimental pharmaceuticals?" Lucius Alexander The palindromedary darkly mutters that spiking Lucius Alexander's tea sounds like a job for Florida Man.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteelCold Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 Florida Man and his sidekick Largo Keyes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubba smith Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 OUCH Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steriaca Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 Let us look at potential powers based on the headlines. 1) Covering himself with ashes makes Florida Man hard to damage. Also, it proves that he is a crappie driver. I would give him a Damage Negation or Damage Reduction witch wears off over time, and perhaps water, to represent the ashes needed to activate this power. 2) Knowing Champions, he could just as well be a 400 year old Indian. But which Indian is he? Sounds like Life Support: Longevity to me (2CP can make him live up to 400 years, so I would say 3CP, for up to 800 years). 3) Putting a Dragon Lizard in ones mouth sounds a bit dangerous, unless you have a pocket dimension in your mouth. Sounds like Extra Dimensional Space to me. Question: exactly how long is a Dragon Lizard? He might not have enough space for the entire lizard, cause the tail sticks out to slap people with. 4) Stealing that much chicken and ribs also sounds like another use of the Extra Dimensional Space power. 5) Killing three gators is not that tough. Anyone with a keen eye and a good gun can do it. Eating them, thoe, is something. The headline doesn't state raw or cooked. Sounds like Life Support: "Eat Anything" (Immunity To All Terrestrial Diseases And Poisons, Limited Power (Only For Food: -1/2) for 6CP or so). 6) Sounds like Detect Ghost to me..."Oh! Yeah!" 7) Proof that it only protects him form food, not alcohol or LSD. No Life Support to cover this... 8) Again, lack of protection from getting high/drunk/stone, and bad driving skills. 9) Low intelligence coupled with a high ego. That is just the surface with Florida Man. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteelCold Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 Don't forget Luck. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 You're just discovering the glory that is Florida Man now? Well, better late than never Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 Florida Man, Florida Man, does anything a sane man wouldn't.... Lucius Alexander Is "Florida Man bites palindromedary" news? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wcw43921 Posted February 28, 2016 Report Share Posted February 28, 2016 Florida Man, Florida Man, Does Whatever A Florida Can, Is He Crazed? Without A Doubt! Everywhere He Goes They Shout "Look Out! Here Comes Florida Man!" Is He Stoned? Is He Smashed? Does He Take His Potatoes Mashed? No One Knows, No One Cares, But Everywhere He Goes They're Scared, They're Scared, Scared Of Florida Man! He Has No Fear, And He Has No Shame, And Whatever Is Wrong, He Always Gets The Blame! Florida Man, Florida Man, Florida's Very Own Florida Man, Sanity, He's Ignored, Chaos Is His Reward, To Him, Life Is A Great Big Party, He Really Likes To Party, I Can't Stop Saying Party, Wherever There's A Party, You'll Find Florida Man! (Set to the tune of. . .well, if you don't know by now--) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hyper-Man Posted February 29, 2016 Report Share Posted February 29, 2016 Florida Man, Florida Man, does anything a sane man wouldn't.... Lucius Alexander Is "Florida Man bites palindromedary" news? I don't know. I had a dog that might have bitten you though. From Beautiful Clearwater Florida *Home of the #1 Beach in America and the Headquarters of the Church of Scientology. HM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hyper-Man Posted February 29, 2016 Report Share Posted February 29, 2016 Let us look at potential powers based on the headlines. 1) Covering himself with ashes makes Florida Man hard to damage. Also, it proves that he is a crappie driver. I would give him a Damage Negation or Damage Reduction witch wears off over time, and perhaps water, to represent the ashes needed to activate this power. 2) Knowing Champions, he could just as well be a 400 year old Indian. But which Indian is he? Sounds like Life Support: Longevity to me (2CP can make him live up to 400 years, so I would say 3CP, for up to 800 years). 3) Putting a Dragon Lizard in ones mouth sounds a bit dangerous, unless you have a pocket dimension in your mouth. Sounds like Extra Dimensional Space to me. Question: exactly how long is a Dragon Lizard? He might not have enough space for the entire lizard, cause the tail sticks out to slap people with. 4) Stealing that much chicken and ribs also sounds like another use of the Extra Dimensional Space power. 5) Killing three gators is not that tough. Anyone with a keen eye and a good gun can do it. Eating them, thoe, is something. The headline doesn't state raw or cooked. Sounds like Life Support: "Eat Anything" (Immunity To All Terrestrial Diseases And Poisons, Limited Power (Only For Food: -1/2) for 6CP or so). 6) Sounds like Detect Ghost to me..."Oh! Yeah!" 7) Proof that it only protects him form food, not alcohol or LSD. No Life Support to cover this... 8) Again, lack of protection from getting high/drunk/stone, and bad driving skills. 9) Low intelligence coupled with a high ego. That is just the surface with Florida Man. I can tell you that gator tastes like chicken. HM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scott Baker Posted February 29, 2016 Report Share Posted February 29, 2016 I can tell you that gator tastes like chicken. HM I think that's what the gators say about eating us too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
freakboy6117 Posted February 29, 2016 Report Share Posted February 29, 2016 Florida man the undying He won't stay down http://thevalleyreport.com/2016/02/13/florida-man-dies-in-meth-lab-explosion-after-lighting-farts-on-fire/ http://usnews.nbcnews.com/_news/2012/11/26/15460502-florida-man-who-died-in-cockroach-eating-contest-choked-to-death-autopsy-says?lite http://www.khou.com/story/news/nation-now/2015/12/04/florida-man-chokes-to-death-on-steak-at-birthday-dinner/76782254/ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SteelCold Posted February 29, 2016 Report Share Posted February 29, 2016 Hey, we almost forgot the Florida Man-o-mobile. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
aylwin13 Posted March 4, 2016 Report Share Posted March 4, 2016 You're just discovering the glory that is Florida Man now? Well, better late than never I think that Logan is actually Florida Man. RUN AWAY!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted March 5, 2016 Report Share Posted March 5, 2016 More of an anti-hero. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hyper-Man Posted March 19, 2016 Report Share Posted March 19, 2016 https://www.facebook.com/FOX13TampaBay/videos/10153554042883525/ http://www.fox13news.com/news/local-news/109531210-story HM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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