BlueCloud2k2

The difference between a Super Villain and a Villain is presentation.
 
 

Monsters University is just Revenge of the Nerds for kids...

"I don't need to vaccinate, because of herd immunity."
 
"Do you understand the mathematics of herd immunity?"
 
<Taken slightly aback, as most fuzz-brains are by direct invocation of mathematics> "I don't need to understand the math. It just works."
 
<Shift to Grim Reaper mode: Face expressionless, intense stare at target.> "The way to become a statistic is to fail to understand the mathematics."

Durkon's wisdom score continues to cut through the bull$#*t with ease

"Kent. This is God. Have you been touching yourself again?"

New one up!
 
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0982.html

Dammit for not being in a position to actually laugh out loud!

I really liked this. Two really horrible characters gone. (horrible as in bad people  not badly written) 

He could have just been an old man, whose skin collor was greenish after being affected by some experiment.
 
I mean he is the "Mad Scientist" type. And I don't think we ever found out how Dr. Drakken from Kim possible got his blue skin.

Hermione Granger, the Pirate Queen
 

 
Don't judge me!

"The Dark Morris Song" by Steeleye Span from the album, Wintersmith
 

From a friend of mine in Ohio:
 
"Ah, spring. That time of year when we shift from Hoth to Dagobah."

well not of my week, but I saw it this week. 
 

Soooo...  We have a new winter storm approaching.  Winter Storm Thor.
 
I was wondering how much Marvel paid to have that name inserted into the list, and pointed out to my daughter that this begs the need to have Hurricane Hulk.
 
She said, "No, we need Winter Storm Bucky.  'It'll be tough, but we'll have to Soldier on...'"

"What is Pokemon about, anyway?"
 
"Kids run around trapping wild animals and making them fight each other. It's basically a cartoon about cockfighting."

Joke from a five year old after watching GotG.
 
 
5yo: Knock, Knock
Dad : Who's there?
5yo: Interrupting Rocket and Groot
Dad: Interupting Ro-
5yo: I AM GROOT !!
 
 
 
You gotta love that.
 

Voldemort: Knock Knock.
Harry Potter: Who's There?
Voldemort: You Know.
Harry Potter: You Know Who?
Voldemort: Exactly!
 
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Daisy.
Daisy who?
Daisy me rollin', they hatin'!

Reminds me of a DnD session back when 3e first came out.
 
I was playing a half-orc barbarian and we got attacked in the middle of the night. My barbarian had spent some of his loot drinking and whoring with two half-elves and a human lady of the night (I was in highschool) and failed my Listen check to wake up.
 
Our Elven Sorcerer had just hit 6th level and got Lightning Bolt. He was just getting ready for bed and rolled a Nat20 on his Listen check. His door was at the end of the hall and he opened it up and saw a half-dozen men in full-plate armor wearing the colors of the baron we'd just pissed off. He then proceeded to use his surprise round and ambush the attackers with a Lightning Bolt. Then initiative happened and and he rolled another Nat20 on that.
 
So he Bolted them again.
 
That woke my Barbarian up.
 
Me: "I toss the girls off of me and rip the door off of its hinges. "What in Gruumsh's missing testicle is going on out here!?" Brandishing my greataxe and making an intimidation check.
 
DM: "They are all dead."
 
Me: I glare at the elf. "Next time use the Silent Spell feat!"
 
Of course, that started a 40-minute argument on Meta-magic feats. Nevermind that I was making a joke.

A syringe labeled "live poliovirus" would be so much more effective.

The same way we pass every off season, try and take over the world !

The cheesiest pickup line of all time:
 
 
 

Heard an interesting and cogent explanation of Transformers last night, related by a friend whose son formulated it:
 
Transformers are were-cars.

I want to punch an anti-vaxxer in the face.
 
With a baseball bat.

During a recent rpg session:
 
"What do you think we should do?"
 
"We should break for dinner."
 
"You were asked to pick a strategy, and you choose to eat? You are a Hobbit!"

I love that an ork street samurai goes by "The Hogfather". Just shows that people still read Pratchett in the 2070s.