Narf the Mouse Posted February 16, 2011 Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions Q - How have you managed to maintain your sanity for so long? A - Maybe it's supposed to be on fire. Q: That gorilla is on fire! A: Well, it is pretty awesome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted February 16, 2011 Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: Well' date=' it is pretty awesome.[/quote'] Q: So did you have a wonderful time under the Aura Boralis? A: That's because Linda Carter's lawyers gave him a restraining order that even pertains to him time travelling back to when she did Wonder Woman Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darbor Posted February 16, 2011 Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: That's because Linda Carter's lawyers gave him a restraining order that even pertains to him time travelling back to when she did Wonder Woman Q: I could swear Bill Shatner was lurking in the back of these Wonder Woman press photos. Why don't I see him anymore? A: If I thought you would make this any better by going back in time I would say go ahead, but I know you, you will just screw it up worse. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 16, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: If I thought you would make this any better by going back in time I would say go ahead' date=' but I know you, you will just screw it up worse.[/quote'] Q: The missiles are in the air, and all life on Earth will perish in less than 20 minutes... so why won't you let me test my time machine? A: I guess we'll just have to wait for an emergency to come up, then. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 16, 2011 Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: I guess we'll just have to wait for an emergency to come up' date=' then.[/quote'] Q: Need I remind you that you need something earlier in the alphabet than FAIL to get any real attention around here? A: If it's blue, kill it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 16, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 16, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: If it's blue' date=' kill it.[/quote'] Q: What are your thoughts about Smurfs? A: If that's "reasonable", I'd hate to see "are-you-out-of-your-effing-mind?!". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darbor Posted February 17, 2011 Report Share Posted February 17, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: If that's "reasonable"' date=' I'd hate to see "are-you-out-of-your-effing-mind?!".[/quote'] Q: I have one reasonable request; can I just get sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads? A: Total party kill. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 17, 2011 Report Share Posted February 17, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: Total party kill. Q: We interrupt this rave with an important announcement -- we got the Ecstasy and the cyanide switched into the wrong containers and the tablets are identical. Will, what can go wrong? A: Yes, we're going to the Party Party. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darbor Posted February 17, 2011 Report Share Posted February 17, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: Yes' date=' we're going to the Party Party.[/quote'] Q: I hear the Communists throw the best post-election bashes. Is that where you're going? A: Just put one foot in front of the other. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 18, 2011 Report Share Posted February 18, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: Just put one foot in front of the other. Q: I've forgotten how long the diving board I've attached to this bottomless pit is. How can I measure it at this late date? A: When the Sergeant asks you if you want to live forever, the proper answer is "YES!"! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 18, 2011 Report Share Posted February 18, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: When the Sergeant asks you if you want to live forever' date=' the proper answer is "YES!"![/quote'] Q: We're being sent to the Sausage Machine Front. Any thoughts? A: No, you're thinking of the other fuzzy green meat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 21, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: No' date=' you're thinking of the other fuzzy green meat.[/quote'] Q: Isn't fuzzy green meat like this bad for you? A: I never knew there was more than one kind. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Darbor Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: I never knew there was more than one kind. Q: What do you mean? An African or European swallow? A: It's a simple question of weight ratios! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 21, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: It's a simple question of weight ratios! Q: What do you mean it doesn't matter where he grips it? A: That isn't such a simple question. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: That isn't such a simple question. Q - What is the answer to life, the universe, and everything? A - I know they can; I just don't think they will. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 21, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A - I know they can; I just don't think they will. Q: Why are politicians incapable of balancing a budget? A: That's even more depressing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 21, 2011 Report Share Posted February 21, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: That's even more depressing. Q: Did you know that entropy is continuing to increase at alarming rates? A: He knows math that manipulates the very fabric of the universe -- and he can do it in his head. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 22, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 22, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: He knows math that manipulates the very fabric of the universe -- and he can do it in his head. Q: So he's a cross between the Rain Man and Merlin... what's the big deal? A: He know when the cake is done. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted February 22, 2011 Report Share Posted February 22, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: He know when the cake is done. Q - Wait, did he just say that the cake is not a lie after all? A - Maybe you'll find someone else to help you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 22, 2011 Report Share Posted February 22, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A - Maybe you'll find someone else to help you. Q: You can't join me on my Godzilla hunt? A: His number is unlisted -- at least I hope it is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted February 22, 2011 Report Share Posted February 22, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: His number is unlisted -- at least I hope it is. Q: Dude, everyone has a cell now! Why don't we just call Cthulhu and ask him what the best pizza in R'lyeh is? A: You couldn't get it here even if we knew what that was. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 22, 2011 Report Share Posted February 22, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: You couldn't get it here even if we knew what that was. Q: Man, I sure could go for some Draconian Barbl Steak! Who's coming with me? A: And this is why we want to avoid being given a Red Card. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted February 22, 2011 Report Share Posted February 22, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Man, I sure could go for some Draconian Barbl Steak! Who's coming with me? A: And this is why we want to avoid being given a Red Card. Q: ...Zombie McCarthy roams the board? A: On second thought, it probably wouldn't be much fun. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted February 24, 2011 Report Share Posted February 24, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: On second thought' date=' it probably wouldn't be much fun.[/quote'] Q: Isn't this great! We're gonna go surfing down an erupting volcano on a two-by-four! Say, where are you going? A: I was previously unaware there were degrees of dead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted February 24, 2011 Author Report Share Posted February 24, 2011 Re: Answers & Questions A: I was previously unaware there were degrees of dead. Q: Whoo-hoo-hoo, look who knows so much. It just so happens that your friend here is only mostly dead. A: You've had a rough day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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