Hermit

First they came for the whisky, and I did not speak out - because I was a bourbon drinker.

But why is the rum gone?

The Highest Bidder

The Highest Bidder

The Highest Bidder

Well ... it is set in the *80s.

... Uh ... Nationwide, we were only 36 testees who got the top grade ... point one percent ...
 
Feeling a bit whelmed right now.

Big Bird was never my favorite character on the street, but despite his upbeat attitude, and almost endless optimism, he never got on my nerves like some perpetually cheerful kids show characters did. Big Bird wanted you to cheer up but to my recollection, never seemed PUSHY about it. In fact, if you were down, he sat next to you, and understood you were sad and he would sit there with you if it would help, and listen. Oh he'd be upbeat soon enough, and like Kermit he saw the best in people, but the bird was often the biggest guy in the room, he always gave your feelings the space (And respect) they deserved.
 
So props to the Bird.
 
And Oscar? Oscar was the guy... Surly, snarly... dare I say a hermit? 
 
So RIP to the performer who made them both shine

Oscar was the ultimate hoarder, enjoying keeping what other people threw away and keeping them in what is, for most intents and purposes, a pocket dimension (many have compared it to the TARDIS, though Snoopy's Doghouse may be an equally accurate approximation). He also kept a pet caterpillar, showing affection to one of the lowliest of creatures. He too had a big heart like Big Bird, but you could never get him to admit it.

Big Bird was never my favorite character on the street, but despite his upbeat attitude, and almost endless optimism, he never got on my nerves like some perpetually cheerful kids show characters did. Big Bird wanted you to cheer up but to my recollection, never seemed PUSHY about it. In fact, if you were down, he sat next to you, and understood you were sad and he would sit there with you if it would help, and listen. Oh he'd be upbeat soon enough, and like Kermit he saw the best in people, but the bird was often the biggest guy in the room, he always gave your feelings the space (And respect) they deserved.
 
So props to the Bird.
 
And Oscar? Oscar was the guy... Surly, snarly... dare I say a hermit? 
 
So RIP to the performer who made them both shine

Big Bird was never my favorite character on the street, but despite his upbeat attitude, and almost endless optimism, he never got on my nerves like some perpetually cheerful kids show characters did. Big Bird wanted you to cheer up but to my recollection, never seemed PUSHY about it. In fact, if you were down, he sat next to you, and understood you were sad and he would sit there with you if it would help, and listen. Oh he'd be upbeat soon enough, and like Kermit he saw the best in people, but the bird was often the biggest guy in the room, he always gave your feelings the space (And respect) they deserved.
 
So props to the Bird.
 
And Oscar? Oscar was the guy... Surly, snarly... dare I say a hermit? 
 
So RIP to the performer who made them both shine

(A bit more)

We went to that section of the base that definitely did not seem so high tech, there was a plain oak desk that no one was supposed to look through 'upon penalty of pain'. As far as I knew, no one had ever called Lady Obsidian's bluff on that one, not even Tornado who could be a bit nosy by nature. She reached into one drawer, opened it, and drew out a manila folder, then handed it to Ariana with a nod to me to join in share it with her.
 
"Wow, the technology you super-geniuses use never cease to amaze me," Ariana said as she ran her hands over the folder and spread it open.
 
"Just think of it as a zip file full of PDFs that's hack-proof from cyber attacks," Doctor Vernon said, "And spare me the sauce, young lady. I thought you, at least, would be excited by this."
 
"I am," She said, "Was, am," She blushed in response, "I just well, I think I'll feel better when I know who we're working with."
 
"This will tell you facts about them, it won't tell you who they are. No file can really do that," Lady Obsidian said, "You should see the files I have on you two. Surprisingly unhelpful at times."
 
"Wait, you have a file on us?" I asked, "In this desk, just, hard copy ready for anyone to steal?"
 
"This place doesn't get raided by outside forces," She started to say.

Both Ariana and I gave her a look.
 
"Often," Lady Obsidian finished, "And they always go for the hard drive. Besides, it's chemically treated with some fail safes that will make stealing it tricky."
 
"Chemically treated? Should I be glad I'm wearing gloves?" Valerosa asked.
 
"Relax, the ink just starts to fade without the proper elements in the air, i mix a chemical compound into our ventilation that's not quite the same composition as the air outside," Lady Obsidian explained, "The ink is set to break apart in it's absence. Nice little security option, mmm?"
 
"Wait, you're messing with our air supply?" I looked at her alarmed.

"Yeah, about that?" Valerosa added.
 
"Relax," the super scientist said again, "You two are hardly in danger of being all out of love or so lost." A chuckle.
I didn't get it.

I shot a confused look at Ariana.

She looked confused right back and shrugged.
 
Our leader noticed this, "'I'm All Out of Love, Air Supply? Very White Australian band, 1980? Sweet little ballad?"
 
"Oh," I said, "1980," And nodded slowly, "A 'classic' then, ah... never heard of it."
 
"I'm not really up on golden oldies," Ariana explained.
 
Lady Obsidian huffed, "Young people annoy me so much some days. Fine, Let's get back to the files." Then she muttered a bit more about our generation.
 
Ariana's chocolate eyes met mine and hers were dancing. I had to admit, that was fun. Wrong, but fun.
 
But our attention turned to the files and we flipped the folder. Each file had a picture of the individual in their costume, then the list of Codename, summary of powers, notations on their background and history, and then a sort of layman psychological profile. I couldn't help but wonder for a moment what my file looked like?
 
I put the vanity and insecurity into a tight little ball and buried it where it would surely arise as a full blown psychological condition later, like any guy does and focused on reading the list.
 
The first image was a guy a bit on the scrawny side, by superhero standards. To be fair, there are some athletes that are on the scrawny side by superhero standards. He had cape and cowl combo which worked nicely, but as for masks, instead of covering his eyes, he had a sort of lower mask covering his mouth and jawline. His colors were dark purple and stark white, more of the former than the latter though. 
 
I read the notes over my girlfriend's shoulder, "Aspirant, interesting name, oh no," I groaned, "his power is telepathy? That's almost as creepy as a mystic."
 
"One of your best friends is a mystic," Ariana reminded me.
 
"Yeah but I knew Mayo before he got into the heebie jeebie stuff," I countered, "And telepathy? I don't know, this kid doesn't have defenses, he'll be killed. Really, Doctor,  you decided he needed a enhancement device so he could read more minds?"
 
Lady Obsidian said "Actually I gave him the enhancer so he could turn it off. You see, while it was short range, for a time he couldn't stop picking up thoughts. The enhancer has given him the ability to wall it off, to coordinate. This poor guy has had a hard life, he couldn't be near people without drowning in their thoughts, at first folks thought he was going crazy and tried to have him committed, and he stumbled onto a murder plot which he foiled and nearly died for. Now? With the ability to wall it off, he still wants to help. That's hero material."
 
"Well," I said, "I feel petty," I admitted. Actually, now I was feeling a great deal of sympathy, "Poor guy. Anything else crappy in his life?"
 
"Well, he's from Nova Scotia, Canada," Lady Obsidian said, "So you know some folk are going to tease him there."
 
Ariana winced, "Yeah, could be worse though. Could be from one of those interchangeable Carolinas"
 
I looked at my girlfriend, letting some of the hurt show, "Did I forget an important date or something?"

 
Ariana chuckled, "I'm sorry, I couldn't help it. Now who is next," She flipped to the next file. As it was in her hands, I was going to be moving at her speed of read.

"Hussar," I read the next, now this guy was broad shouldered, and out of those shoulders was a pair of wings of white and gold that matched the blond hair on his head. His costume had a kind of cosplay armor look, that is the sort of gear that looks impressive but isn't really chain mail? "Were his wings tinier before the enhancer?" I dared.
"Oh no, Hussar came into this world full powered more or less, he's the clone of Angel Man," she said.
 
I might have been merely an eager layman in history, but the hero stuff I had down pretty well, "Angel Man has been dead for fifty years."
"Brave new world," Lady Obsidian said, "Like Angel Man, he's superstrong, tough and flies... the flying could be useful and the rest well, both of you can teach that. He wasn't prematurely aged or anything, he's had the powers all his life, but was raised in a farm in the midwest but he's got something to prove."
"At least we're not talking about a three year old in an adult body or anything," Ariana said with relief, then "We can work with this." Her confidence was returning, and I resolved to try not to rain on her parade.
 
Me? I was glad to have someone with innate abilities he'd been used to for while.
 
The next one was a woman, who had skin that appeared to be made of bark, or maybe bark over her skin? Some of it prickly here and there, not quite even.  The overall effect made her look like a fantasy cover. From this it was hard to tell her age. There were a few petals bursting out over her left ear and I think some blackberries.

"She's human right?" I asked as I looked at the figure, "Not that we have a human only policy."

"Bramble's human, that's her battle form I guess," Lady Obsidian said, "Her powers are hard to define, Botanokinesis? She can sense plant life, and alter it in some amazing ways. Underneath that bark is a teenage girl with amazing potential. Before the enhancer, her powers were pretty weak, so this is really new to her."
"Noted," Ariana says, "Any of them have any hand to hand training?"

"Not that I know of," Lady Obsidian confessed.

"What?" Ariana scowled, "They've had powers all their lives, wanted to be superheroes for years, and they did no prep?"

"Well, I don't know about no prep," The professor said, "Some of them never thought they'd be big, they helped in small ways. Now they have a chance for the majors."
Valerosa rolled her eyes, "Wishing never got anyone anywhere. I'm going to have to build them up from the ground up."

"We still have one other," I reminded her, a bit startled at her heat.  Arianna was a sweet sympathetic person, it was one of the things I loved about her. Yet here, she was showing an almost disdain for those who just waited for the enhancers.

Lady Obsidian said, "I remind you, I picked these people. I'm not saying their perfect, but inside them, they have the stuff. How you get them to bring it out, that's between you two. Also, might as well take a look at the last one, and no she never studied karate."

The last girl was on fire. I don't mean she was attractive, though she was; sometimes in the superhero business, metaphors get lost fast. I mean her hair either was fire, or was burning enough you couldn't really see it and there were flickers of flame all over her body and costume. I wondered if she appreciated a good pun making 'hot pants' part of her costume.

Ariana glanced over this last file, "Super-speed and fire powers? That's an interesting combination."

"Probably why she's going by the handle Trailblazer," Lady Obsidian chuckled, "I agree some basic hand to hand is good, but in her case I want you to work on her accuracy. Flame throwing is the power that makes your average citizen shudder, and for good reason."

"Not just the citizens," I muttered. Fire is not my friend.  I mean, I'm not a neanderthal, I don't consider it an angry god. But it dries me out fast and my super durably becomes 'pretty nice' durability bordering on meh. If not for my regeneration abilities in a good soak later, I'd probably look like a burn ward victim.
Lady Obsidian looked at us,"Look over the files, but remember patience, and get to know them. Superheroes aren't just a listing of powers, skills, and abilities, and we each come with our own hang ups and psychological..."

    "Disadvantages?" Ariana finished glancing at the profiles.

    "I was going to say complications," I looked over the sheets.

    "Baggage, I was going to say baggage," Lady Obsidian said, "At the end of the day,  every person who is a superhero has their own insecurities and their own character flaws. It's what keeps us human."
    I looked at her and smiled, "Even you?"

    Our team leader shook her head, "Young sir, I have a bag full of cats in my brain too, they aren't that much more well behaved than yours. They're just tired and need a nap more often."

    Ariana smiled lightly at that, "Thanks for the files, Caleb and I will go study," then to emphasis her point, she kissed my cheek, "Ready to do homework and talk on this?"

    "Sure am," I smiled at her. I recognized the gesture. She was reminding me duty came before pleasure, but letting me know she also wished it weren't so, "I have to say, I actually like the code names."

    "You sound almost disappointed," Ariana raised a brow as she walked with me.

    "Well, with all the flack I catch for Eel,"  I said, "A little."

    "You can still change that superhero name, you know?" She reminded.

    "No," I said then added, "Besides, do you know what a nightmare it is to change the merch?"

    Ariana chuckled and we went to study. Sadly, JUST study.
 

(A bit more)

We went to that section of the base that definitely did not seem so high tech, there was a plain oak desk that no one was supposed to look through 'upon penalty of pain'. As far as I knew, no one had ever called Lady Obsidian's bluff on that one, not even Tornado who could be a bit nosy by nature. She reached into one drawer, opened it, and drew out a manila folder, then handed it to Ariana with a nod to me to join in share it with her.
 
"Wow, the technology you super-geniuses use never cease to amaze me," Ariana said as she ran her hands over the folder and spread it open.
 
"Just think of it as a zip file full of PDFs that's hack-proof from cyber attacks," Doctor Vernon said, "And spare me the sauce, young lady. I thought you, at least, would be excited by this."
 
"I am," She said, "Was, am," She blushed in response, "I just well, I think I'll feel better when I know who we're working with."
 
"This will tell you facts about them, it won't tell you who they are. No file can really do that," Lady Obsidian said, "You should see the files I have on you two. Surprisingly unhelpful at times."
 
"Wait, you have a file on us?" I asked, "In this desk, just, hard copy ready for anyone to steal?"
 
"This place doesn't get raided by outside forces," She started to say.

Both Ariana and I gave her a look.
 
"Often," Lady Obsidian finished, "And they always go for the hard drive. Besides, it's chemically treated with some fail safes that will make stealing it tricky."
 
"Chemically treated? Should I be glad I'm wearing gloves?" Valerosa asked.
 
"Relax, the ink just starts to fade without the proper elements in the air, i mix a chemical compound into our ventilation that's not quite the same composition as the air outside," Lady Obsidian explained, "The ink is set to break apart in it's absence. Nice little security option, mmm?"
 
"Wait, you're messing with our air supply?" I looked at her alarmed.

"Yeah, about that?" Valerosa added.
 
"Relax," the super scientist said again, "You two are hardly in danger of being all out of love or so lost." A chuckle.
I didn't get it.

I shot a confused look at Ariana.

She looked confused right back and shrugged.
 
Our leader noticed this, "'I'm All Out of Love, Air Supply? Very White Australian band, 1980? Sweet little ballad?"
 
"Oh," I said, "1980," And nodded slowly, "A 'classic' then, ah... never heard of it."
 
"I'm not really up on golden oldies," Ariana explained.
 
Lady Obsidian huffed, "Young people annoy me so much some days. Fine, Let's get back to the files." Then she muttered a bit more about our generation.
 
Ariana's chocolate eyes met mine and hers were dancing. I had to admit, that was fun. Wrong, but fun.
 
But our attention turned to the files and we flipped the folder. Each file had a picture of the individual in their costume, then the list of Codename, summary of powers, notations on their background and history, and then a sort of layman psychological profile. I couldn't help but wonder for a moment what my file looked like?
 
I put the vanity and insecurity into a tight little ball and buried it where it would surely arise as a full blown psychological condition later, like any guy does and focused on reading the list.
 
The first image was a guy a bit on the scrawny side, by superhero standards. To be fair, there are some athletes that are on the scrawny side by superhero standards. He had cape and cowl combo which worked nicely, but as for masks, instead of covering his eyes, he had a sort of lower mask covering his mouth and jawline. His colors were dark purple and stark white, more of the former than the latter though. 
 
I read the notes over my girlfriend's shoulder, "Aspirant, interesting name, oh no," I groaned, "his power is telepathy? That's almost as creepy as a mystic."
 
"One of your best friends is a mystic," Ariana reminded me.
 
"Yeah but I knew Mayo before he got into the heebie jeebie stuff," I countered, "And telepathy? I don't know, this kid doesn't have defenses, he'll be killed. Really, Doctor,  you decided he needed a enhancement device so he could read more minds?"
 
Lady Obsidian said "Actually I gave him the enhancer so he could turn it off. You see, while it was short range, for a time he couldn't stop picking up thoughts. The enhancer has given him the ability to wall it off, to coordinate. This poor guy has had a hard life, he couldn't be near people without drowning in their thoughts, at first folks thought he was going crazy and tried to have him committed, and he stumbled onto a murder plot which he foiled and nearly died for. Now? With the ability to wall it off, he still wants to help. That's hero material."
 
"Well," I said, "I feel petty," I admitted. Actually, now I was feeling a great deal of sympathy, "Poor guy. Anything else crappy in his life?"
 
"Well, he's from Nova Scotia, Canada," Lady Obsidian said, "So you know some folk are going to tease him there."
 
Ariana winced, "Yeah, could be worse though. Could be from one of those interchangeable Carolinas"
 
I looked at my girlfriend, letting some of the hurt show, "Did I forget an important date or something?"

 
Ariana chuckled, "I'm sorry, I couldn't help it. Now who is next," She flipped to the next file. As it was in her hands, I was going to be moving at her speed of read.

"Hussar," I read the next, now this guy was broad shouldered, and out of those shoulders was a pair of wings of white and gold that matched the blond hair on his head. His costume had a kind of cosplay armor look, that is the sort of gear that looks impressive but isn't really chain mail? "Were his wings tinier before the enhancer?" I dared.
"Oh no, Hussar came into this world full powered more or less, he's the clone of Angel Man," she said.
 
I might have been merely an eager layman in history, but the hero stuff I had down pretty well, "Angel Man has been dead for fifty years."
"Brave new world," Lady Obsidian said, "Like Angel Man, he's superstrong, tough and flies... the flying could be useful and the rest well, both of you can teach that. He wasn't prematurely aged or anything, he's had the powers all his life, but was raised in a farm in the midwest but he's got something to prove."
"At least we're not talking about a three year old in an adult body or anything," Ariana said with relief, then "We can work with this." Her confidence was returning, and I resolved to try not to rain on her parade.
 
Me? I was glad to have someone with innate abilities he'd been used to for while.
 
The next one was a woman, who had skin that appeared to be made of bark, or maybe bark over her skin? Some of it prickly here and there, not quite even.  The overall effect made her look like a fantasy cover. From this it was hard to tell her age. There were a few petals bursting out over her left ear and I think some blackberries.

"She's human right?" I asked as I looked at the figure, "Not that we have a human only policy."

"Bramble's human, that's her battle form I guess," Lady Obsidian said, "Her powers are hard to define, Botanokinesis? She can sense plant life, and alter it in some amazing ways. Underneath that bark is a teenage girl with amazing potential. Before the enhancer, her powers were pretty weak, so this is really new to her."
"Noted," Ariana says, "Any of them have any hand to hand training?"

"Not that I know of," Lady Obsidian confessed.

"What?" Ariana scowled, "They've had powers all their lives, wanted to be superheroes for years, and they did no prep?"

"Well, I don't know about no prep," The professor said, "Some of them never thought they'd be big, they helped in small ways. Now they have a chance for the majors."
Valerosa rolled her eyes, "Wishing never got anyone anywhere. I'm going to have to build them up from the ground up."

"We still have one other," I reminded her, a bit startled at her heat.  Arianna was a sweet sympathetic person, it was one of the things I loved about her. Yet here, she was showing an almost disdain for those who just waited for the enhancers.

Lady Obsidian said, "I remind you, I picked these people. I'm not saying their perfect, but inside them, they have the stuff. How you get them to bring it out, that's between you two. Also, might as well take a look at the last one, and no she never studied karate."

The last girl was on fire. I don't mean she was attractive, though she was; sometimes in the superhero business, metaphors get lost fast. I mean her hair either was fire, or was burning enough you couldn't really see it and there were flickers of flame all over her body and costume. I wondered if she appreciated a good pun making 'hot pants' part of her costume.

Ariana glanced over this last file, "Super-speed and fire powers? That's an interesting combination."

"Probably why she's going by the handle Trailblazer," Lady Obsidian chuckled, "I agree some basic hand to hand is good, but in her case I want you to work on her accuracy. Flame throwing is the power that makes your average citizen shudder, and for good reason."

"Not just the citizens," I muttered. Fire is not my friend.  I mean, I'm not a neanderthal, I don't consider it an angry god. But it dries me out fast and my super durably becomes 'pretty nice' durability bordering on meh. If not for my regeneration abilities in a good soak later, I'd probably look like a burn ward victim.
Lady Obsidian looked at us,"Look over the files, but remember patience, and get to know them. Superheroes aren't just a listing of powers, skills, and abilities, and we each come with our own hang ups and psychological..."

    "Disadvantages?" Ariana finished glancing at the profiles.

    "I was going to say complications," I looked over the sheets.

    "Baggage, I was going to say baggage," Lady Obsidian said, "At the end of the day,  every person who is a superhero has their own insecurities and their own character flaws. It's what keeps us human."
    I looked at her and smiled, "Even you?"

    Our team leader shook her head, "Young sir, I have a bag full of cats in my brain too, they aren't that much more well behaved than yours. They're just tired and need a nap more often."

    Ariana smiled lightly at that, "Thanks for the files, Caleb and I will go study," then to emphasis her point, she kissed my cheek, "Ready to do homework and talk on this?"

    "Sure am," I smiled at her. I recognized the gesture. She was reminding me duty came before pleasure, but letting me know she also wished it weren't so, "I have to say, I actually like the code names."

    "You sound almost disappointed," Ariana raised a brow as she walked with me.

    "Well, with all the flack I catch for Eel,"  I said, "A little."

    "You can still change that superhero name, you know?" She reminded.

    "No," I said then added, "Besides, do you know what a nightmare it is to change the merch?"

    Ariana chuckled and we went to study. Sadly, JUST study.
 

Japanese Dad Metal?
 
 

I got fired when I asked a customer if he preferred smoking or non-smoking.
 
Apparently the correct terms are "cremation" and "burial."

Loved the "DIsadvantages" / "Complications" lines.  Now I wonder whether Hero 7E will rename them "Baggage." 
 

(A bit more)

We went to that section of the base that definitely did not seem so high tech, there was a plain oak desk that no one was supposed to look through 'upon penalty of pain'. As far as I knew, no one had ever called Lady Obsidian's bluff on that one, not even Tornado who could be a bit nosy by nature. She reached into one drawer, opened it, and drew out a manila folder, then handed it to Ariana with a nod to me to join in share it with her.
 
"Wow, the technology you super-geniuses use never cease to amaze me," Ariana said as she ran her hands over the folder and spread it open.
 
"Just think of it as a zip file full of PDFs that's hack-proof from cyber attacks," Doctor Vernon said, "And spare me the sauce, young lady. I thought you, at least, would be excited by this."
 
"I am," She said, "Was, am," She blushed in response, "I just well, I think I'll feel better when I know who we're working with."
 
"This will tell you facts about them, it won't tell you who they are. No file can really do that," Lady Obsidian said, "You should see the files I have on you two. Surprisingly unhelpful at times."
 
"Wait, you have a file on us?" I asked, "In this desk, just, hard copy ready for anyone to steal?"
 
"This place doesn't get raided by outside forces," She started to say.

Both Ariana and I gave her a look.
 
"Often," Lady Obsidian finished, "And they always go for the hard drive. Besides, it's chemically treated with some fail safes that will make stealing it tricky."
 
"Chemically treated? Should I be glad I'm wearing gloves?" Valerosa asked.
 
"Relax, the ink just starts to fade without the proper elements in the air, i mix a chemical compound into our ventilation that's not quite the same composition as the air outside," Lady Obsidian explained, "The ink is set to break apart in it's absence. Nice little security option, mmm?"
 
"Wait, you're messing with our air supply?" I looked at her alarmed.

"Yeah, about that?" Valerosa added.
 
"Relax," the super scientist said again, "You two are hardly in danger of being all out of love or so lost." A chuckle.
I didn't get it.

I shot a confused look at Ariana.

She looked confused right back and shrugged.
 
Our leader noticed this, "'I'm All Out of Love, Air Supply? Very White Australian band, 1980? Sweet little ballad?"
 
"Oh," I said, "1980," And nodded slowly, "A 'classic' then, ah... never heard of it."
 
"I'm not really up on golden oldies," Ariana explained.
 
Lady Obsidian huffed, "Young people annoy me so much some days. Fine, Let's get back to the files." Then she muttered a bit more about our generation.
 
Ariana's chocolate eyes met mine and hers were dancing. I had to admit, that was fun. Wrong, but fun.
 
But our attention turned to the files and we flipped the folder. Each file had a picture of the individual in their costume, then the list of Codename, summary of powers, notations on their background and history, and then a sort of layman psychological profile. I couldn't help but wonder for a moment what my file looked like?
 
I put the vanity and insecurity into a tight little ball and buried it where it would surely arise as a full blown psychological condition later, like any guy does and focused on reading the list.
 
The first image was a guy a bit on the scrawny side, by superhero standards. To be fair, there are some athletes that are on the scrawny side by superhero standards. He had cape and cowl combo which worked nicely, but as for masks, instead of covering his eyes, he had a sort of lower mask covering his mouth and jawline. His colors were dark purple and stark white, more of the former than the latter though. 
 
I read the notes over my girlfriend's shoulder, "Aspirant, interesting name, oh no," I groaned, "his power is telepathy? That's almost as creepy as a mystic."
 
"One of your best friends is a mystic," Ariana reminded me.
 
"Yeah but I knew Mayo before he got into the heebie jeebie stuff," I countered, "And telepathy? I don't know, this kid doesn't have defenses, he'll be killed. Really, Doctor,  you decided he needed a enhancement device so he could read more minds?"
 
Lady Obsidian said "Actually I gave him the enhancer so he could turn it off. You see, while it was short range, for a time he couldn't stop picking up thoughts. The enhancer has given him the ability to wall it off, to coordinate. This poor guy has had a hard life, he couldn't be near people without drowning in their thoughts, at first folks thought he was going crazy and tried to have him committed, and he stumbled onto a murder plot which he foiled and nearly died for. Now? With the ability to wall it off, he still wants to help. That's hero material."
 
"Well," I said, "I feel petty," I admitted. Actually, now I was feeling a great deal of sympathy, "Poor guy. Anything else crappy in his life?"
 
"Well, he's from Nova Scotia, Canada," Lady Obsidian said, "So you know some folk are going to tease him there."
 
Ariana winced, "Yeah, could be worse though. Could be from one of those interchangeable Carolinas"
 
I looked at my girlfriend, letting some of the hurt show, "Did I forget an important date or something?"

 
Ariana chuckled, "I'm sorry, I couldn't help it. Now who is next," She flipped to the next file. As it was in her hands, I was going to be moving at her speed of read.

"Hussar," I read the next, now this guy was broad shouldered, and out of those shoulders was a pair of wings of white and gold that matched the blond hair on his head. His costume had a kind of cosplay armor look, that is the sort of gear that looks impressive but isn't really chain mail? "Were his wings tinier before the enhancer?" I dared.
"Oh no, Hussar came into this world full powered more or less, he's the clone of Angel Man," she said.
 
I might have been merely an eager layman in history, but the hero stuff I had down pretty well, "Angel Man has been dead for fifty years."
"Brave new world," Lady Obsidian said, "Like Angel Man, he's superstrong, tough and flies... the flying could be useful and the rest well, both of you can teach that. He wasn't prematurely aged or anything, he's had the powers all his life, but was raised in a farm in the midwest but he's got something to prove."
"At least we're not talking about a three year old in an adult body or anything," Ariana said with relief, then "We can work with this." Her confidence was returning, and I resolved to try not to rain on her parade.
 
Me? I was glad to have someone with innate abilities he'd been used to for while.
 
The next one was a woman, who had skin that appeared to be made of bark, or maybe bark over her skin? Some of it prickly here and there, not quite even.  The overall effect made her look like a fantasy cover. From this it was hard to tell her age. There were a few petals bursting out over her left ear and I think some blackberries.

"She's human right?" I asked as I looked at the figure, "Not that we have a human only policy."

"Bramble's human, that's her battle form I guess," Lady Obsidian said, "Her powers are hard to define, Botanokinesis? She can sense plant life, and alter it in some amazing ways. Underneath that bark is a teenage girl with amazing potential. Before the enhancer, her powers were pretty weak, so this is really new to her."
"Noted," Ariana says, "Any of them have any hand to hand training?"

"Not that I know of," Lady Obsidian confessed.

"What?" Ariana scowled, "They've had powers all their lives, wanted to be superheroes for years, and they did no prep?"

"Well, I don't know about no prep," The professor said, "Some of them never thought they'd be big, they helped in small ways. Now they have a chance for the majors."
Valerosa rolled her eyes, "Wishing never got anyone anywhere. I'm going to have to build them up from the ground up."

"We still have one other," I reminded her, a bit startled at her heat.  Arianna was a sweet sympathetic person, it was one of the things I loved about her. Yet here, she was showing an almost disdain for those who just waited for the enhancers.

Lady Obsidian said, "I remind you, I picked these people. I'm not saying their perfect, but inside them, they have the stuff. How you get them to bring it out, that's between you two. Also, might as well take a look at the last one, and no she never studied karate."

The last girl was on fire. I don't mean she was attractive, though she was; sometimes in the superhero business, metaphors get lost fast. I mean her hair either was fire, or was burning enough you couldn't really see it and there were flickers of flame all over her body and costume. I wondered if she appreciated a good pun making 'hot pants' part of her costume.

Ariana glanced over this last file, "Super-speed and fire powers? That's an interesting combination."

"Probably why she's going by the handle Trailblazer," Lady Obsidian chuckled, "I agree some basic hand to hand is good, but in her case I want you to work on her accuracy. Flame throwing is the power that makes your average citizen shudder, and for good reason."

"Not just the citizens," I muttered. Fire is not my friend.  I mean, I'm not a neanderthal, I don't consider it an angry god. But it dries me out fast and my super durably becomes 'pretty nice' durability bordering on meh. If not for my regeneration abilities in a good soak later, I'd probably look like a burn ward victim.
Lady Obsidian looked at us,"Look over the files, but remember patience, and get to know them. Superheroes aren't just a listing of powers, skills, and abilities, and we each come with our own hang ups and psychological..."

    "Disadvantages?" Ariana finished glancing at the profiles.

    "I was going to say complications," I looked over the sheets.

    "Baggage, I was going to say baggage," Lady Obsidian said, "At the end of the day,  every person who is a superhero has their own insecurities and their own character flaws. It's what keeps us human."
    I looked at her and smiled, "Even you?"

    Our team leader shook her head, "Young sir, I have a bag full of cats in my brain too, they aren't that much more well behaved than yours. They're just tired and need a nap more often."

    Ariana smiled lightly at that, "Thanks for the files, Caleb and I will go study," then to emphasis her point, she kissed my cheek, "Ready to do homework and talk on this?"

    "Sure am," I smiled at her. I recognized the gesture. She was reminding me duty came before pleasure, but letting me know she also wished it weren't so, "I have to say, I actually like the code names."

    "You sound almost disappointed," Ariana raised a brow as she walked with me.

    "Well, with all the flack I catch for Eel,"  I said, "A little."

    "You can still change that superhero name, you know?" She reminded.

    "No," I said then added, "Besides, do you know what a nightmare it is to change the merch?"

    Ariana chuckled and we went to study. Sadly, JUST study.
 

Hmmm, Caleb doesn't strike me as the wine sort.
 
Maybe he should experiment with beer.  It's probably closer to his budget -- but herding supers, he might be better off going straight to Scotch...

(resuming)

The rest of the meeting had been talks of scheduling, what base they'd be using in Port Cascade, and talk about budget management that threatened to make more than one set of eyes glaze over.

To my minor annoyance, the focus was definitely on the new city, and not nearly enough detail (for my liking) on what things would be like here once Ariana and I were left riding herd on this crew.  Ariana nodded a lot, but sometimes we exchanged worried looks as the others were talking away. She had said this could be exciting, but now she was thinking of the downside.

The phrase "two days" came up, and I felt a clock in my head switch on. Forty Eight hours of team and then suddenly half of the New Samaritans would be out of reach- just like that. It was a bit overwhelming to think of. When I first came here, I wasn't exactly a rookie, but I was definitely the newbie.  I'd gotten a crash course in teamwork, tactics, and crime fighting that started when I got off that bus and hadn't really stopped. 

I'd been lectured to, chewed out, and supported in ways I couldn't possibly grasp. If I was honest with myself, I probably deserved the chewing out and lectures, and I was very grateful for the support. But through all of this, I did not recall learning how to teach.
Even when I got teamed up with Pogo, my advice was more in the vein of the tactical and practical. Choose your target carefully, don't taunt the mind controller unless you wanted to be singing 'I'm a little tea pot' for the next ten minutes, that sort of thing. I hadn't really said 'this is how you can use those powers more efficiently'. At least, I didn't think I had. 
And my own power-set was not complex. I breathed water, swam fast,  I was able to withstand a lot of pressure of all sorts, and I hit things really, really, hard. Honestly the water breathing was the rarest thing about my powers. Without that, I wouldn't be the fish guy, I'd be the guy guy. Okay, maybe mighty guy, but every team out there with more than four people has one of those.
 
What if someone had some super weird power I could totally not relate to? I mean, Valerosa was right there by my side, but if someone walked up and said "Hi, I'm Captain Quantum" we both would be sunk. I'm getting a degree in engineering, I don't do that advanced physics on a cosmic level stuff.
As the meeting went on about what they'd be doing in Port Cascade, I guess my concern must have shown on my face increasingly because even as I tuned out some stuff that I probably should at least have listened to despite not going myself. I only really refocused when I heard my name.
"And increasingly in the online polls we've sent out, most believe Eel should take on the new superhero name Floaty McFloatpants," Lady Obsidian said to the others who were nodding in apparent agreement.
 
"I'm sorry what?" I choked! They didn't really ask for advice on the internet did they? In my experience, that was often like putting a l sign that says 'here's at least 15 minutes entertainment you can have at a fellow human being's expense' on your forehead and hoping for likes.
There were chuckles. Not from me, of course.
 
"Now you refocus," Lady Obsidian looked at the others, "I think that's enough for now, folks. Go rest up or get your luggage ready or whatever."
 
The others nodded and got to it, but she wasn't done as she looked at me and said "You two," A nod to my density shifting girlfriend and myself, "Walk with me."
 
We moved away from the meeting area, Ariana on Lady Obsidian's left side, I took the right. 
"Ask your questions, voice your concerns, because you both kept acting like when I said 'co-captains' you had stepped into something very warm, soft, and with a distinctive scent."
I could have made a joke about Slime there, but that would be species-ist so, I let my better angels win. Besides, he's not that warm.
 
It was  Valorasa who spoke up first actually, and in a bit of a rush that made me realize she was right there with me in concerns, "Look, I've been learning how to fight, and how to do the legwork of a superhero since I was a kid-"
"Last Wednesday right?" Lady Obsidian said dryly. My, but she was in a quippy mood.
 
My favorite snuggler in spandex ignore that and went on, "But teaching isn't something I'm used to?"

"Nonsense, you've given plenty of advice to team mates, and even shown a few ropes to Pogo," Lady Obsidian reminded, "Your uncle maybe a bit older than you, but there are times I'm pretty sure you're the more mature one" she pondered "Barring a few areas anyway."
"Thanks, I-," Ariana let that process, "Wait, in what way is he more mature than-"

This was clearly not the hour for completed sentences if the boss didn't think they were germane to the subject, "Not the point. The point is that I'm sure you both have the stuff needed to teach the trainees together."
 
"Maybe she is, but barring a few tactics, I don't know if I've got the knack, let alone the patience, for teaching folks how to be a superhero, how to use powers, some of which are totally different from mine," I voiced my concern, "I mean, if I run into some 'Captain Quantum'-"
"Ooo, good name," Lady O said, "Kind of old school, new science."
 
"Glad you like," I said and resumed, "With reality alteration powers or something, I am not going to be able to relate."
 
"You mean like an older Africian- American woman with more PHDs than a can of Alphabet soup and a young white guy from from the Carolina country side can't relate?"
 
"North Carolina," I clarified.
 
"What's it matter?" Dr. Vivian asked.
 
"Oh, it matters," I said, "It matters," then a I realized, "You're baiting me. I don't know if you're taking our concerns seriously."
 
"I agree with Caleb," Ariana said, then she qualified, "About the teaching concerns, not as much about the differences between one Carolina and the other."
 
I shot my girlfriend a hurt look. Where was the support?
 
"If you two had no concerns, THAT I would take seriously," Lady Obsidian said, "But you do, so I don't."
 
"uh," I said intelligently, then rallying went "But what about patience?"
 
"You know how you build up patience?" Our mentor and team leader asked.
 
"How?" Ariana questioned.
 
"The same way you lose it," Lady Obsidian answered, "By having it tested."
 
Valerosa and I exchanged frustrated looks behind Lady Obsidian's back for a moment.
 
"Are two sulking where you think I can't see?" Lady Obsidian said.
 
"No," I said.
"Definitely not," Ariana said, then added, "We're honored by the trust you're placing in us."
 
"That's the ticket," She said, "Come on, I'll show you their files and give you my two cents on each trainee, but you're going to be fine as Co-Captains."
"You've taught college courses and superhero teams alike," I said, "Sure you have some sort of code or system or words to live by?"
"Fine," She said, "Words to live by if you want to teach supers:  Be Patient, Be Understanding but firm, and moderate your wine intake near the tub."
"I don't drink wine," I said, perhaps missing a point.
"You will," Lady Obsidian said, "Being a teacher means you're finally going to have a reason to."
"This is so very not reassuring," Ariana muttered.
Yet again, my girlfriend and I were in agreement, but at least we were about to get a look at at the trainee files.
I hoped none of them were mystics. I had a friend who was a mystic, but over all? They gave me the creeps.
 

Well done! You really seem to have found H2O fellows "voice.  Ah Piscacene fellow...Icthy fellow?

(resuming)

The rest of the meeting had been talks of scheduling, what base they'd be using in Port Cascade, and talk about budget management that threatened to make more than one set of eyes glaze over.

To my minor annoyance, the focus was definitely on the new city, and not nearly enough detail (for my liking) on what things would be like here once Ariana and I were left riding herd on this crew.  Ariana nodded a lot, but sometimes we exchanged worried looks as the others were talking away. She had said this could be exciting, but now she was thinking of the downside.

The phrase "two days" came up, and I felt a clock in my head switch on. Forty Eight hours of team and then suddenly half of the New Samaritans would be out of reach- just like that. It was a bit overwhelming to think of. When I first came here, I wasn't exactly a rookie, but I was definitely the newbie.  I'd gotten a crash course in teamwork, tactics, and crime fighting that started when I got off that bus and hadn't really stopped. 

I'd been lectured to, chewed out, and supported in ways I couldn't possibly grasp. If I was honest with myself, I probably deserved the chewing out and lectures, and I was very grateful for the support. But through all of this, I did not recall learning how to teach.
Even when I got teamed up with Pogo, my advice was more in the vein of the tactical and practical. Choose your target carefully, don't taunt the mind controller unless you wanted to be singing 'I'm a little tea pot' for the next ten minutes, that sort of thing. I hadn't really said 'this is how you can use those powers more efficiently'. At least, I didn't think I had. 
And my own power-set was not complex. I breathed water, swam fast,  I was able to withstand a lot of pressure of all sorts, and I hit things really, really, hard. Honestly the water breathing was the rarest thing about my powers. Without that, I wouldn't be the fish guy, I'd be the guy guy. Okay, maybe mighty guy, but every team out there with more than four people has one of those.
 
What if someone had some super weird power I could totally not relate to? I mean, Valerosa was right there by my side, but if someone walked up and said "Hi, I'm Captain Quantum" we both would be sunk. I'm getting a degree in engineering, I don't do that advanced physics on a cosmic level stuff.
As the meeting went on about what they'd be doing in Port Cascade, I guess my concern must have shown on my face increasingly because even as I tuned out some stuff that I probably should at least have listened to despite not going myself. I only really refocused when I heard my name.
"And increasingly in the online polls we've sent out, most believe Eel should take on the new superhero name Floaty McFloatpants," Lady Obsidian said to the others who were nodding in apparent agreement.
 
"I'm sorry what?" I choked! They didn't really ask for advice on the internet did they? In my experience, that was often like putting a l sign that says 'here's at least 15 minutes entertainment you can have at a fellow human being's expense' on your forehead and hoping for likes.
There were chuckles. Not from me, of course.
 
"Now you refocus," Lady Obsidian looked at the others, "I think that's enough for now, folks. Go rest up or get your luggage ready or whatever."
 
The others nodded and got to it, but she wasn't done as she looked at me and said "You two," A nod to my density shifting girlfriend and myself, "Walk with me."
 
We moved away from the meeting area, Ariana on Lady Obsidian's left side, I took the right. 
"Ask your questions, voice your concerns, because you both kept acting like when I said 'co-captains' you had stepped into something very warm, soft, and with a distinctive scent."
I could have made a joke about Slime there, but that would be species-ist so, I let my better angels win. Besides, he's not that warm.
 
It was  Valorasa who spoke up first actually, and in a bit of a rush that made me realize she was right there with me in concerns, "Look, I've been learning how to fight, and how to do the legwork of a superhero since I was a kid-"
"Last Wednesday right?" Lady Obsidian said dryly. My, but she was in a quippy mood.
 
My favorite snuggler in spandex ignore that and went on, "But teaching isn't something I'm used to?"

"Nonsense, you've given plenty of advice to team mates, and even shown a few ropes to Pogo," Lady Obsidian reminded, "Your uncle maybe a bit older than you, but there are times I'm pretty sure you're the more mature one" she pondered "Barring a few areas anyway."
"Thanks, I-," Ariana let that process, "Wait, in what way is he more mature than-"

This was clearly not the hour for completed sentences if the boss didn't think they were germane to the subject, "Not the point. The point is that I'm sure you both have the stuff needed to teach the trainees together."
 
"Maybe she is, but barring a few tactics, I don't know if I've got the knack, let alone the patience, for teaching folks how to be a superhero, how to use powers, some of which are totally different from mine," I voiced my concern, "I mean, if I run into some 'Captain Quantum'-"
"Ooo, good name," Lady O said, "Kind of old school, new science."
 
"Glad you like," I said and resumed, "With reality alteration powers or something, I am not going to be able to relate."
 
"You mean like an older Africian- American woman with more PHDs than a can of Alphabet soup and a young white guy from from the Carolina country side can't relate?"
 
"North Carolina," I clarified.
 
"What's it matter?" Dr. Vivian asked.
 
"Oh, it matters," I said, "It matters," then a I realized, "You're baiting me. I don't know if you're taking our concerns seriously."
 
"I agree with Caleb," Ariana said, then she qualified, "About the teaching concerns, not as much about the differences between one Carolina and the other."
 
I shot my girlfriend a hurt look. Where was the support?
 
"If you two had no concerns, THAT I would take seriously," Lady Obsidian said, "But you do, so I don't."
 
"uh," I said intelligently, then rallying went "But what about patience?"
 
"You know how you build up patience?" Our mentor and team leader asked.
 
"How?" Ariana questioned.
 
"The same way you lose it," Lady Obsidian answered, "By having it tested."
 
Valerosa and I exchanged frustrated looks behind Lady Obsidian's back for a moment.
 
"Are two sulking where you think I can't see?" Lady Obsidian said.
 
"No," I said.
"Definitely not," Ariana said, then added, "We're honored by the trust you're placing in us."
 
"That's the ticket," She said, "Come on, I'll show you their files and give you my two cents on each trainee, but you're going to be fine as Co-Captains."
"You've taught college courses and superhero teams alike," I said, "Sure you have some sort of code or system or words to live by?"
"Fine," She said, "Words to live by if you want to teach supers:  Be Patient, Be Understanding but firm, and moderate your wine intake near the tub."
"I don't drink wine," I said, perhaps missing a point.
"You will," Lady Obsidian said, "Being a teacher means you're finally going to have a reason to."
"This is so very not reassuring," Ariana muttered.
Yet again, my girlfriend and I were in agreement, but at least we were about to get a look at at the trainee files.
I hoped none of them were mystics. I had a friend who was a mystic, but over all? They gave me the creeps.
 

I think Mike Rutherford said it best: