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Answers & Questions


Klytus
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4 minutes ago, Asperion said:

A: These boots of speed are not functioning as prescribed. 

 

Q: OK, Mister Dwarven Meth Addict, what's your complaint about last week's dungeon l00tz?

 

A: That's a novel interpretation of green dragons' acid breath.

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2 hours ago, Cancer said:

A: That's a novel interpretation of green dragons' acid breath.

 

Q: Yeah, it's dangerous to collect, but it sure gives fish and chips a nice tang!

 

A: This is why it's important to pillage before you burn.

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20 hours ago, Pariah said:

 

Q: Yeah, it's dangerous to collect, but it sure gives fish and chips a nice tang!

 

A: This is why it's important to pillage before you burn.

 

Q: Why did everyone return with this incinerated stuff?

 

A: We have the dragon in our back pocket. 

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On 3/12/2022 at 10:29 AM, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: Anyone seen Lockheed?

 

A: The moment I first took LSD, my life made sense. Then it wore off.

 

Q: What is the main topic of your autobiography?

 

A: This is the greatest moment of your career. 

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4 hours ago, Asperion said:

A: This is the greatest moment of your career. 

 

Q: I just wrote a multiple choice test where none of the correct answers were C.  :eg:

 

A: Popcorn and peach schnapps, please.

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18 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: When going to a cinema pub, what do you order for a German film?

 

A: I don't care if he made some of the best films of the generation. He still has to pay the rent.

 

Q: Why was Hitchcock kicked out of hell?

 

A: We decided to take the path less traveled. 

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On 3/17/2022 at 11:19 PM, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: What do you think you're doing on that Segway, anyway?

 

A: Perhaps that was not the best way to write an epic fantasy.

 

Q: What is this crazy story about Grilkins, Munkins, and other strange beings??

 

A: If by everyone you mean me, then the answer is yes. 

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14 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said:

A: Keeping up my Secret Identity is costing me a fortune in airfare!

 

Q: Wait, you Secret Identity is an Emirati oil tycoon?

 

A: I'm as tough as the crust of the Earth is.

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On 3/23/2022 at 10:39 AM, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: OK, I've landed in London, and have checked the airport carousel,, but where's my cat?

 

A: I can't work up the courage to tell my dog she's adopted.

 

Q: With all those cats around and only one dog,  do you have anything that you want to say?

 

A: I am constantly listening to the voices in my coffee. 

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On 4/1/2022 at 7:51 PM, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: Why do you love your job at Starbucks so much?

 

A: If I were you, I'd think twice about casting the ghost of Roscoe "Fatty" Arbuckle in your movie.

 

Q: What makes you believe that we can get a successful ghost feature using this highly controversial figure?

 

A: The solution is under your foot. 

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6 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said:

A: I've got a bone to pick with you! Several, in fact!

 

Q: What did the dragon say to the inexperienced knight?

 

A: And that's why coffee is for grown-ups!

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8 minutes ago, Asperion said:

A: This came from our Mad Files. 

 

Q: You have a photograph of Marjorie Taylor Greene in a compromising position with ... Alfred E. Newman?

 

A: YOU FOOL! 

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On 4/15/2022 at 10:17 AM, Cancer said:

 

Q: That Big Red Button ... Can I push it?  Just a little?

 

A: That's like being a little bit pregnant.

 

Q: What is your response to these empty money bags?

 

A: And that was when I casually said that I would like a dog's life. 

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