Michael Hopcroft Posted December 1, 2021 Report Share Posted December 1, 2021 21 hours ago, Pariah said: A: Puffins, puffins everywhere! Q: We're out of penguins? What gave you that idea? A: Now is the time for all good people to come to the aid of their favorite television program! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted December 1, 2021 Report Share Posted December 1, 2021 13 minutes ago, Michael Hopcroft said: A: Now is the time for all good people to come to the aid of their favorite television program! Q: Good grief, is it time for the PBS membership drive again? A: It's bad, sir. The barbarians are at the gate, and they're riding ankylosaurs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted December 2, 2021 Report Share Posted December 2, 2021 23 hours ago, Pariah said: Q: Good grief, is it time for the PBS membership drive again? A: It's bad, sir. The barbarians are at the gate, and they're riding ankylosaurs. Q: What makes you believe that our doutanioum walls will not be able to withstand their attacks? A: This guard dog is not the problem. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted December 5, 2021 Report Share Posted December 5, 2021 On 12/2/2021 at 8:37 AM, Asperion said: A: This guard dog is not the problem. Q: Aww, look at the cute little terrier with a collar packed with C4 -- wait, what? A: If you think that's impressive, wait until I show you Ice-Thirteen! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted December 8, 2021 Report Share Posted December 8, 2021 On 12/5/2021 at 3:46 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: Aww, look at the cute little terrier with a collar packed with C4 -- wait, what? A: If you think that's impressive, wait until I show you Ice-Thirteen! Q: With all those lasers, don't you believe those skaters made an impressive demonstration? A: You underestimated human stupidity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted December 8, 2021 Report Share Posted December 8, 2021 1 hour ago, Asperion said: A: You underestimated human stupidity. Q: How in the world did <insert politician's name here> ever get elected in the first place? A: Play dumb@ss games, win dumb@ss prizes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted December 15, 2021 Report Share Posted December 15, 2021 On 12/8/2021 at 10:16 AM, Pariah said: Q: How in the world did <insert politician's name here> ever get elected in the first place? A: Play dumb@ss games, win dumb@ss prizes. Q: What are we going to do with a team of 21 untrained moles? A: That was a massive statement from Grogu. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted December 15, 2021 Report Share Posted December 15, 2021 32 minutes ago, Asperion said: A: That was a massive statement from Grogu. Q: Did Baby Yoda just say "I am Groot"? A: It's yet another amazing achievement that nobody will care about in 5 years. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted December 15, 2021 Report Share Posted December 15, 2021 5 minutes ago, Pariah said: A: It's yet another amazing achievement that nobody will care about in 5 years. Q: So what did you think of the latest AAA video game? A: And that's why I broke up with the Master Chief. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted December 22, 2021 Report Share Posted December 22, 2021 On 12/15/2021 at 9:13 AM, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: So what did you think of the latest AAA video game? A: And that's why I broke up with the Master Chief. Q: So Master Chief destroyed your home planet, stole the entire family, and left you for dead? A: May the Krumpus spirit take you all!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted December 22, 2021 Report Share Posted December 22, 2021 6 hours ago, Asperion said: A: May the Krumpus spirit take you all!!! Q: What did Scrooge McDuck tell the family as he was led away in a straitjacket? A: He believes he is the world's richest dog. He is mistaken. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted December 23, 2021 Report Share Posted December 23, 2021 1 hour ago, Michael Hopcroft said: A: He believes he is the world's richest dog. He is mistaken. Q: Hey, what was going on that they hauled away Garfield in a straitjacket? A: There is another step down from getting coal in your stocking. It's getting prune juice in your stocking. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted December 23, 2021 Report Share Posted December 23, 2021 2 hours ago, Cancer said: A: There is another step down from getting coal in your stocking. It's getting prune juice in your stocking. Q: I know you hate the kid, but aren't you at least going to freeze it first? A: Grandma got run over by a reindeer, who is now doing ten-to-twenty for vehicular manslaughter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted December 23, 2021 Report Share Posted December 23, 2021 14 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: I know you hate the kid, but aren't you at least going to freeze it first? A: Grandma got run over by a reindeer, who is now doing ten-to-twenty for vehicular manslaughter. Q: Why are all the children claiming to have a terrible Christmas this year? A: Rudolph's nose is actually a black light. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted December 23, 2021 Report Share Posted December 23, 2021 5 hours ago, Asperion said: A: Rudolph's nose is actually a black light. Q: isn't that primary spectral line about 400 nanometers shorter than you anticipated? A: All I want for Christmas is Utah. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted December 24, 2021 Report Share Posted December 24, 2021 5 hours ago, Pariah said: A: All I want for Christmas is Utah. Q: You've got Texas, Oklahoma, Kansas, Nebraska, Colorado, Wyoming, Utah, Idaho, and Alberta. Why the long face? A: Hey, some people give cars. Some people give repossession notices. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted December 24, 2021 Report Share Posted December 24, 2021 3 minutes ago, Cancer said: A: Hey, some people give cars. Some people give repossession notices. Q: I got a copy of Desert Bus for Christmas?What gives, Santa? A: Nice job downing that drone, but I think we've both been put on the Naughty List. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted December 25, 2021 Report Share Posted December 25, 2021 On 12/23/2021 at 8:54 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: I got a copy of Desert Bus for Christmas?What gives, Santa? A: Nice job downing that drone, but I think we've both been put on the Naughty List. Q: What makes you believe that Santa won't be visiting anyone this year? A: The drome patrol is at their rounds again. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted January 2, 2022 Report Share Posted January 2, 2022 On 12/25/2021 at 9:01 AM, Asperion said: A: The drome patrol is at their rounds again. Q: Didn't there used to be an air base here? A: Sure, I can get you a squadron of Spitfires, but it's up to you to fly them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted January 3, 2022 Report Share Posted January 3, 2022 On 1/1/2022 at 9:40 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: Didn't there used to be an air base here? A: Sure, I can get you a squadron of Spitfires, but it's up to you to fly them. Q: What do you mean by the "human toll" that comes separate? A: That volleyball was spiked by the Hulk. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted January 3, 2022 Report Share Posted January 3, 2022 2 hours ago, Asperion said: A: That volleyball was spiked by the Hulk. Q: What is this volleyball doing on the Moon? A: The first tourist trip to Mars blasts off in a week, and I got you a ticket. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted January 4, 2022 Report Share Posted January 4, 2022 On 1/3/2022 at 11:55 AM, Michael Hopcroft said: A: The first tourist trip to Mars blasts off in a week, and I got you a ticket. Q: What would Pariah sell his left arm to be able to say to Donald Trump and his flunkies? A: That's my secret. I'm always cranky. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted January 5, 2022 Report Share Posted January 5, 2022 17 hours ago, Pariah said: A: That's my secret. I'm always cranky. Q: Man, you have a lot of wind-up toys. How do you keep them all going? A: They're like unicorns. They don't actually exist any more. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted January 5, 2022 Report Share Posted January 5, 2022 14 minutes ago, Cancer said: Q: Man, you have a lot of wind-up toys. How do you keep them all going? A: They're like unicorns. They don't actually exist any more. Q: What do you mean that we don't have any Death Tribbles on stock? A: That is the power of. . . . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted January 6, 2022 Report Share Posted January 6, 2022 On 1/5/2022 at 8:13 AM, Asperion said: A: That is the power of. . . . Q: Forty milliwatts at 1.5 volts DC? A: It sounds better if you mispronounce it as "megatons". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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