I Can't Believe He Played That!

[jackalope]

Here's a thread that may hurt some people's feelings, so be careful how you answer.

 

What the LAMEST character you've ever seen another player actually play? Concept wise, not point-build wise.

 

The LAMEST character I have ever seen in my life was my friend "Bob's" back-up character. "Bob's" main character was a electrical energy blaster named Blue Bolt, an okay if not exceptional character. "Bob's" backup character, however, was the LAMEST character I've ever seen.

 

His name was Quarter, and his only power was this: He could shoot razor sharp quarters from his palms. Why? Because he was exposed to radiation while holdinga roll of quarters in each hand.

 

Yeah, I know. That's just stupid. Whenever "Bob" would play Quarters, my character would ask him to explain his origin over and over. And then always ask the same question: "Okay then, but why are the quarters razor sharp? Were you carrying rolls of razor sharp quarters? Cuz I don't get it. Why don't you run out of quarters if you were only carrying two rolls?"

 

It drove me crazy. Especially when he would use the quarters to buy things (and this was before the wealth perk - and perks in general - were a part of Champions). Cause every timehe invoked his special effect, I was reminded that my team included the LAMEST character ever. And I knew, because he told me, that the concept was only intended to justify this min-maxed RKA machine he'd built.

 

So, what is the LAMEST character concept you've ever seen? Can you top Quarters, the Amazing Change Giving Hero?

[BobGreenwade]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

Quarters isn't so bad. I have a feeling you'll decide that after you've seen some of the anecdotes people are bound to post.

 

The lamest I've ever seen was Father Flash... a priest wearing a clerical collar and an overcoat. I'll leave the rest to the imagination. (As Mike Surbrook put it after first finding out about this guy: "That's... just... wrong.")

 

There have been plenty of others as well, such as Big Mac, who became a super-strong brick whenever he ate his namesake sandwich.

[Vanguard00]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

An anime-style were-shark in an urban Dark Champions setting. With martial arts.

[Acroyear]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

The memories are so painful... it's hard to pick one.

 

Maybe The Noid from the old Domino's Pizza commercials.

[Blue]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

Wow. I think I'll go hug my players.

[Acroyear]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

There was a monk... but he had an upside down face.

 

A brain in a jar that controlled a robot suit of armor with devastating HKA blades based on a lawnmower.

 

A guy who got earth manipulation powers from eating a radioactive gopher (because gophers, you know, tunnel...)

 

Another guy with earth manipualtion powers who could fly by turning into green light (green light being an earth power somehow).

 

A guy who surrounded himself with wads of paper. Enough paper padding and anything is invulnerable!

 

Beer-kinesis (actually quite well built) - beer generation and projection powers.

 

Moses. He never died. Check out the cool plagues I can put on people...

 

Hand Man. One hand the size of a person... which was dressed up and acted as a decoy for the owner (ventriloquism, and all). Because, you know, hits to the hand do half stun and body. "I let my fingers do the walking..."

 

 

I can't go on...

[Blue]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

The worst from my players cannot even come close. Their only problem is an occasional lack or originality (unlike youre players!).

 

I've got a knockoff of Data (the android), a knockoff of liquid-metal-guy from T2, I once had a knockoff of the green glowing ball from Heavy Metal.

 

And I believe every group has had at some point the guy who runs an equivalent to "Pheremone", a woman who could induce lust (even in other females) at will. While a nice plot for a porn flick, not exactly the game I was intending to run...

[Katherine]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

Volley:He turned into a giant rubber ball. That was it. Some Damage Reduction (Non Resistant) and Superleap. The rest of his points went it obscuce (and basically useless) KS's and Skill levels with Move Thru (But since his had Strength of 8....). The player got bored with him faily quickly and my character Menagerie killed him by opening the door on our escape craft when he started bouncing and letting him fly out into a volcano (that used to Pittsburgh).

 

Killer Carl:Huge mishapen brick with a prehensile penis and a rape fetish.

 

The Brain. He was just that. A brain in jar. No mental powers, no robot body, nothing. Just Int, Edietic Memory and Scholar and tons of silly KS's like "Cereal Manufacture" and "Tibetan Poetry".

[jackalope]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

Quarters isn't so bad. I have a feeling you'll decide that after you've seen some of the anecdotes people are bound to post.

 

The lamest I've ever seen was Father Flash... a priest wearing a clerical collar and an overcoat. I'll leave the rest to the imagination. (As Mike Surbrook put it after first finding out about this guy: "That's... just... wrong.")

 

There have been plenty of others as well, such as Big Mac, who became a super-strong brick whenever he ate his namesake sandwich.

 

Are those characters that people actually played, with the intention that they be taken seriously? Or just created as jokes?

[dbsousa]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

My little brother played a character named Striker. He was essentially the same martial artist character as his main character, the Protector, with the following changes:

• He had an outrageous french accent (but wasn't French)
  
• He had no arms.
  
• He was insane, and would go berserk if you mentioned his accent or his missing arms.
  

[BobGreenwade]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

Are those characters that people actually played' date=' with the intention that they be taken seriously? Or just created as jokes?[/quote'] In both cases, both.

[Acroyear]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

I once had a knockoff of the green glowing ball from Heavy Metal.

 

That's my Loknar, bitch!

[Katherine]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

And I believe every group has had at some point the guy who runs an equivalent to "Pheremone"' date=' a woman who could induce lust (even in other females) at will. While a nice plot for a porn flick, not exactly the game I was intending to run...[/quote']

 

We had her! It was actually played by a woman. She had pheromones and mad social skills. She acted as our spy and assasin. Considering one of her powers amounted to Vagina Dentata... Well, you can imagine. A kind of unique twist was that she could take DNA information from her lovers (Males) and use it to make clones of them. Even composite clones from several after a fast foward pregnancy. We "bred" a few super soliders for the cause that way.

[Chuckg]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

And I believe every group has had at some point the guy who runs an equivalent to "Pheremone"' date=' a woman who could induce lust (even in other females) at will. While a nice plot for a porn flick, not exactly the game I was intending to run...[/quote']

 

Not our group!

 

... then again, this is our first Champions together.

 

Plus, we all know that if we do such a character, our resident female player will ritually torture us all to death in ways that only her uniquely evil imagination can conceive of when it's /her/ turn to DM.

 

... granted, her current character has the highest COM score on the planet, and comes from a rather libertine society, but she's /not/ 'that way'.

[BcAugust]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

Not our group!

 

... then again, this is our first Champions together.

 

Plus, we all know that if we do such a character, our resident female player will ritually torture us all to death in ways that only her uniquely evil imagination can conceive of when it's /her/ turn to DM.

 

... granted, her current character has the highest COM score on the planet, and comes from a rather libertine society, but she's /not/ 'that way'.

 

*snickers* As the resident female player, I'd be amused at the sillyness, then torture you all. Honestly, I've had one person play a character in a game somewhat like that, but it's a villians game, and it's never been anything but portrayed as evil...

 

Hmmm, worst character concepts I've seen... Oh, yeah. Half Orc Barbarian, in a world that views half orcs as complete scum, going for a leadership of human role.... with Cha 6.

 

Of course, the whole bunch of decent concepts played poorly...

[Acroyear]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

And I believe every group has had at some point the guy who runs an equivalent to "Pheremone"' date=' a woman who could induce lust (even in other females) at will. While a nice plot for a porn flick, not exactly the game I was intending to run...[/quote']

 

Yes, that was me (it was telepathy based - see Sinclair int he "all my characters" thread). Basically, the guy was an emotional wreck and afraid of people and rejection. As a defense mechanism, he had a subtle telepathic push to make people like him. Since he was also pretty much terrified of woman, his subconscious power use basically overcompensated. The main difference was that he didn't control it and, for him, it was actually a disadvantage bought as a power (and tied into some of his other hang ups and disads).

[caris]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

And I believe every group has had at some point the guy who runs an equivalent to "Pheremone"' date=' a woman who could induce lust (even in other females) at will. While a nice plot for a porn flick, not exactly the game I was intending to run...[/quote']

 

My character, Adonis, was originally going to be in part a male variant on that, but I dropped the whole pheromone thing pretty early on.

[Blue]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

Yes' date=' that was me (it was telepathy based - see Sinclair int he "all my characters" thread). Basically, the guy was an emotional wreck and afraid of people and rejection. As a defense mechanism, he had a subtle telepathic push to make people like him. Since he was also pretty much terrified of woman, his subconscious power use basically overcompensated. The main difference was that he didn't control it and, for him, it was actually a disadvantage bought as a power (and tied into some of his other hang ups and disads).[/quote']

Now there you're talking about a deep psychological and philosphical concept. I'm talking about cheap thrills by taking liberties with heroes and villains (of any sex) that don't have the high enough EGO to control themselves.

 

Lasted 2 games. Only because I cautioned the player that the other players (and the GM) weren't too keen on the concept, but in game 2 they kept it up anyway. Character is in prison, under the eye of mechanical guards.

[Acroyear]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

Now there you're talking about a deep psychological and philosphical concept. I'm talking about cheap thrills by taking liberties with heroes and villains (of any sex) that don't have the high enough EGO to control themselves.

 

Oh hell, I just do that with sheer power. Mind Control is for sissies

 

I'm kidding, I'm kidding...

 

...and then there was the guy with the shapeshifting duplicate! He was rich! Rich! He always had movies of himself with movie stars which made him billions! God bless, Jack Action!

[Gary Ciaramella]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

I am kind of stuck between thinking this character will be cool and thinking this character will be lame... but I do like puns, so I think somewhere along the line I will play her in a Dark Champions campaign... a nun who has just seem way too much and decides to take the law into her own hands (or rather, the two machine pistols held in those hands). Sister Mary will terrorize the streets as...

BAD HABIT!

[Thrakazog]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

An anime-style were-shark in an urban Dark Champions setting. With martial arts.

 

Yeah, but I turned him down, so the character never actually got into play.

[pinecone]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

I try not to get to upset with someones aparent inability to have a good concept...I don't want to hurt feelings.....Example Dude looks like a skeliton, has all sorts of "I am death" powers...concept..."I'm a mutant", thats it....I just smile and say "Thats nice"

[DoctorItron]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

Worst from another player: Maybe a butterfly.

 

It's been years, but if I recall correctly this guy's character *was* a butterfly that somehow evolved to speak and grew to human size. His powers included wings (flight) and a cocoon (entangle). His main attack was a rainbow (energy blast) - never did get an explanation why the character would have that power. The character had no heroic motivations, preferring instead to do butterfly-like things such as hanging around in wildflower patches.

 

Worst from me: Probably Keith Richards.

 

This was in the post-apocalypse world of Rifts. Heck, if Keith could survive all the drug abuse he's reportedly subjected his body to, I figured I may as well play him as an immortal Atlantean who kept trying to become a juicer (drug-boosted supermen who live incredibly exciting but pitifully short lives), but his own regenerative powers were stronger than the drugs.

[caris]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

Worst from me: Probably Keith Richards.

 

This was in the post-apocalypse world of Rifts. Heck, if Keith could survive all the drug abuse he's reportedly subjected his body to, I figured I may as well play him as an immortal Atlantean who kept trying to become a juicer (drug-boosted supermen who live incredibly exciting but pitifully short lives), but his own regenerative powers were stronger than the drugs.

 

Oh, I so like this. There has got to be a way to do a homage to this idea in my Champions world.

[Thrakazog]

Re: I Can't Believe He Played That!

 

My group had gotten way too serious at one point, and so I designed a character I thought was silly. The short-version of the background was thus:

 

Planet Spork: where the massive size difference between the sexes allows women to rule with impugnity. Men get menial jobs like janitors. Sporkians are all albinos, with zero hair and zero facial features - no eyes, nose, or mouth. Their skin acts as a unified sensory organ and they "talk" by creating vibrations in an internal organ where the mouth would normally be (a bad hand-waive, I admit, but I'm shooting for "silly".)

 

So. You have your typical alien ship crash landing on Earth orign. everybody dies except the ship's janitor, who holes up in an abandoned warehouse because the odd greeting of the locals - pointing and screaming, occasionally running - is tough to handle in large quantities. He finds an old working television and turns it on. He mistakes it for a "socialization machine", kind of like a "hello, welcome to Earth, here's some examples on how to act that will help you" box. The only problem is, the one channel that comes in is running a John Wayne western marathon.

 

He goes back to the crashed ship after watching the entire marathon. He adapts his uniform into a Hollywood cowboy outfit. He adapts his high-tech multi-function mop device into a Winchester that fires four types of energy ammo (EB, RKA, flash, entangle). He then goes out to meet the public.

 

So you have this stark-white albino with zero hair or facial features in a cowboy outfit with an energy gun and acting just like John Wayne. After the expected mishaps, the team took him on as legal guardians. His heroic name was Space Cowboy.

 

He ended up being one of the most fun characters I've ever role-played, and he's still a favorite of the group. We had a Terminator clone enter the game around the same time. They became best of friends. Who knew.