Cancer Posted March 5, 2010 Report Share Posted March 5, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A - Stop. Slow down' date=' and take a deep breath. On the other hand, don't. That would only make things worse.[/quote'] Q: We gotta fix the carbon monoxide leak quick or we're all gonna die!! A: That, too, is tasteless. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 5, 2010 Author Report Share Posted March 5, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: That' date=' too, is tasteless.[/quote'] Q: How about we use cardboard instead of oatmeal? A: One hundred push ups. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 5, 2010 Report Share Posted March 5, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: One hundred push ups. Q: That's all you get for flipping off the sergeant? Who knew he could be so merciful? A: Stick close to your desks, and never go to sea, and you all may be rulers of the Queen's Navy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 6, 2010 Report Share Posted March 6, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: Stick close to your desks' date=' and [i']never[/i] go to sea, and you all may be rulers of the Queen's Navy! Q - I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral. I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical, from Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical. What have you learned in Officer Candidate School? A - I'd call that a hand cannon. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 6, 2010 Report Share Posted March 6, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A - I'd call that a hand cannon. Q: Isn't that a little, well, big for a pistol? A: Doubtless he intended the device to do all his thinking for him. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 6, 2010 Author Report Share Posted March 6, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: Doubtless he intended the device to do all his thinking for him. Q: Why did he attach a computer to his crotch? A: BVD on DVD. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 7, 2010 Report Share Posted March 7, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: BVD on DVD. Q - Underwear models on video? Really, sis? A - She's about the cutest thing you'll ever see. I hope you survive the experience. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 7, 2010 Author Report Share Posted March 7, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A - She's about the cutest thing you'll ever see. I hope you survive the experience. Q: How did your new kitten give your grandmother heart-failure? A: The brain's dark energy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 7, 2010 Report Share Posted March 7, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: The brain's dark energy. Q: Why is Pinky sitting in the corner of the cage gibbering? A: He's not so think as you drunk he is! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted March 7, 2010 Report Share Posted March 7, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions Q: Why is Pinky sitting in the corner of the cage gibbering? A: He's not so think as you drunk he is! Q: Master Yoda, has Anakin been drinking? A: Zombie Jamborie. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 7, 2010 Report Share Posted March 7, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: Zombie Jamborie. Q: How do you know you're at The Boy Scout Camp of the Damned? A: I tried to bake some Girl Scout Cookies, but couldn't find any Girl Scout at the store. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 8, 2010 Report Share Posted March 8, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: I tried to bake some Girl Scout Cookies' date=' but couldn't find any Girl Scout at the store.[/quote'] Q - I suppose you forgot the baby oil, too? A - Say the word and be like me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 8, 2010 Report Share Posted March 8, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A - Say the word and be like me. Q: So I too can go mad and die horribly if I say "Hastur" three time fast? A: I look just like Buddy Holly! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 8, 2010 Author Report Share Posted March 8, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: I look just like Buddy Holly! Q: Why did you get kicked-out of the Elvis look-alike contest? A: The coolest game room ever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted March 8, 2010 Report Share Posted March 8, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: The coolest game room ever. Q: You built a billiard parlor on Pluto??? A: The word for that is FAIL. With every emphasis the medium will allow. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 8, 2010 Report Share Posted March 8, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: The word for that is FAIL. With every emphasis the medium will allow. Q: Hi, Foxbat here! What do you think of painting Disneyland purple as a phase inn my New Master Plan? A: Now if only you could get a young Jack Nicholson to play me, THEN you'd have a movie! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted March 10, 2010 Report Share Posted March 10, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: Now if only you could get a young Jack Nicholson to play me' date=' THEN you'd have a movie![/quote'] Q: So Mr. Joker, I hear that you have a request for the newest Batman movie? A: Crush the Era. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 10, 2010 Report Share Posted March 10, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: Crush the Era. Q: What do you get when you pitch from the Washington Nationals? A: It's PINO -- Professional in Name Only. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Klytus Posted March 10, 2010 Author Report Share Posted March 10, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: It's PINO -- Professional in Name Only. Q: You're a PITA? A: A magical touch. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Narf the Mouse Posted March 10, 2010 Report Share Posted March 10, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions Q: You're a PITA? A: A magical touch. Q: You've got the Midas touch? A: Gloves would have worked wonders. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 10, 2010 Report Share Posted March 10, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: Gloves would have worked wonders. Q: Gold is now valueless in Crete! Did you really have to create such an oversupply of gold, Your Majesty! A: If an asset loses the war for you when lost, it's not an asset anymore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DocMan Posted March 10, 2010 Report Share Posted March 10, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: If an asset loses the war for you when lost' date=' it's not an asset anymore.[/quote'] Q: Holy Western Union, Batman! There's a note tied to the bomb on my back? What's it say? A: He always liked going out with a Bang. Doc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted March 10, 2010 Report Share Posted March 10, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: He always liked going out with a Bang. Q: He was last seen with a box of nitrocellulose condoms in his jacket pocket?!? A: We changed the names of all the streets, so Boardwalk is the new Jail. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tim Posted March 10, 2010 Report Share Posted March 10, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: We changed the names of all the streets, so Boardwalk is the new Jail. Q: An "Escape from New York" version of Monopoly? A: Don't step on the community's chest. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted March 10, 2010 Report Share Posted March 10, 2010 Re: Answers & Questions A: Don't step on the community's chest. Q: What should you avoid when the world's population has been reduced to seven? A: Polka-dotted is this year's green. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.