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A Thread for Random Musings


Old Man

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

I have started using Paint Shop Pro, all I have to say is HOORAH FOR THE BURN TOOL!

This Scanner has changed my life.

And made me sexier to boot.

 

Rage: New and improved! Feel his muscles, touch his scrotum, lick his nasal cavities!

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

Dear Fbi.

I hate George W Bush, and would like to see him lose the elections by any means.

Thankyou

J. Kerry

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Dear CIA

Hey guys, my dad said use are good at killing doodz, pop a cap in that other guy's ass. You know, he is that guy with the face

- G.Bush (not the one you worked with, the other one)

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

Dear FBI.

Excuse me sir, would you mind taki.. Oh damn. No one will ever actually pay attention to me. If you could take it in your hearts to think about maybe killing both guys then possibly I could have a chance?

R. Nader (I have good ideas. Really I do.)

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Dear CIA,

Please stop firing pot shots at me. I understand that in all the movies people with names like mine are evil, but this is REAL LIFE! Leave me and my Nuclear stockpile alone.

- Micheal Badnarik (I'm not evil)

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Dear FBI

-I invented democracy, please pay me my royalties or atleast give my country medical help and food.

-Kim Jong Il

p.s George says he want's that guy with the face dead, you know the one, he's that guy. You know. Yay high, hates america, drove somesort of fast boat or something. You know... The other guy whose trying to get the people to bet on the other team trying to be president. You know it's way easier just to have your dad as the old president and you just replace him. Like me and George.

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Dear Sir or Madam

I do not and cannot love you. Please enjoy this free flight. Of stairs. Enjoy your trip.

-Push. Bot

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

Well, the election is almost here. I just embarked on a new career path, the wife is looking to get into Pharmacy school and we want to buy a house this year....it's a scary time...and here's a cool song by a cool guy to sum up my feelings...

 

All that's yet to come.

Glen Burtnik

 

 

 

I can see the mountains I've had to climb

and where I've started from

But I can't help wonderin' what I'll find

in all that's yet to come

Cos the sun comes up

and the days go past

no matter where I run

But I still can't see hwo the die is cast

in all that's yet to come

 

And I've studied poets and followed dreams

making a way down the road

but the trail stretches out to eternity

and there's not tellin' where it will go

 

So I pray eachd day for my daily bread

so many miles from home

and then try to prophecy what comes next

as if I'll ever know

But if I could see what was up ahead

before my time is done

would I have the wisdom to wait instead

through all that's yet to come

 

And I've gotten high and I've laid down low

looking for holes in the wall

but it reaches out further than I can go

and maybe to norwhere at all

 

And so if a wish ever came my way

- if I was granted one

yeah well maybe I'd just throw that wish away

into all that's yet to come

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

It's finally over. My tenure at Howl-o-Scream has reached completion. It ended on a good note, and I look forward to the day when I look back on it with fond memories. For the foreseeable future, however, I want nothing more than to forget it ever happened. :angst::angst:

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

After exhausting research into the Compliment thread, I've discovered I've given out 12 compliments there so far and my wife gave out one. Simple math allows me to deduce that I should have therefore received 12 compliments and my wife one compliments. HOWEVER, somehow I've only received 7 compliments and my wife has received 6 compliments.

 

 

 

:straight: :straight: :straight: :straight: :straight: :straight: :straight: :straight:

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

The impressionists and gag writers have been having a field day skewering the American election.

 

For example Bush saying he is 'a merkin' or proud to be a merkin.

Merkins are pubic wigs.

 

Adverts from the Republican party saying that Kerry is scary and that the two words rhyme, that he looks like a vampire and he could use his chin to spear children it's that sharp. As a result vote Bush.

 

Another ad saying that Kerry is not putting aside money to take on another great threat to America, the monsters in the closet. Bush will do this.

 

Kerry doing Apocalypse Now in a quest to get Clinton to back him. Finds him in the heart of darkness. A Waterstone's bookstore in London.

 

Hillary and Bill spooking Misery. The sledgehammer scene. Hillary complains that if Bill has gone out supporting Kerry then she won't be President in 4 years time. Bill begs her not to break his legs. She doesn't. but guess where the hammer ends up ?

 

Florida sherrifs being asked how they intend to help people vote. Well they'll wear white uniforms. And they'll carry the symbol of the vote, you know a cross. So they'll set fire to the crosses to light the way to the voting station.

 

Also the BBC presenters going on about their stay in America and the expenses and food they'll be able to have.

 

Finally Michael Moore sets out after his most elusive prey yet. Michael Moore.

That was funny. Michael got frustrated because he could not get to speak to Michael Moore.

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Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

A post I made in the Q & A thread reminded me of a good friend of mine (I have actually posted his portrait in the NGD Art thread), who . . . Well, he's not clumsy, per se, but he has at least 2d6 Unluck . . .

 

He told me once of an incident he had in school, when they had Dance in the PhysEd class. He was late, and as a result he got teamed up with a not too popular girl left over (this was in what corresponds to US High School; tough nuggins, socially speaking . . .) The music came on, and the dance in question was a jitterbug. My pal started doing his stuff, showing off his skillz, twirling the girl all round the flor. He did a number that pirouetted her in a circle round him, but . . . When she passed behind his back, he was too slow taking a step forward, and she tripped in full twirl over his calves - straight into the wall, five feet away, head first. Tweety bird time.

 

This guy is the only one I know of that's got a Black Belt in Bug.

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Guest Worldmaker

Re: A Thread for Random Musings

 

This morning I had what everyone thought was a heart attack. At the hospital, they confirmed that it wasn't... I apparently had an anxiety-related muscle spasm that shut my breathing down to a trickle and caused my chest to feel like an elephant was sitting on it. I now how five holes in my arm, and feel wrung out.

 

As a secondary finding, it just so happens that I am diabetic, and I never knew. This contributed to the problem in some interesting ways.

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