Cancer Posted January 11, 2020 Report Share Posted January 11, 2020 County coroner. "You, you, you, and you. You're all dead. And it's my job to say so. Dead people can't vote or hold office, and are subject to arrest if they try." NT: More nonstandard abuses of their designated duties by low-level officials. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted January 11, 2020 Report Share Posted January 11, 2020 1 hour ago, Cancer said: NT: More nonstandard abuses of their designated duties by low-level officials. I'm reminded of the old Tom Lehrer bit about the young necrophiliac who finally achieved his boyhood ambition of becoming coroner. ("The rest of you can look it up when you get home.") BoloOfEarth 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted January 11, 2020 Report Share Posted January 11, 2020 1 hour ago, Cancer said: NT: More nonstandard abuses of their designated duties by low-level officials. Parking station attendant.who designates where you can park based on how hot you are Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted January 12, 2020 Report Share Posted January 12, 2020 On 1/11/2020 at 9:44 AM, Cancer said: NT: More nonstandard abuses of their designated duties by low-level officials. "Nobody gets into the club unless they prove to me they're willing to get down on all fours and quack like a duck. Yes, I know ducks are bipedal, but you still have to do it." NT: Animals that would look really weird if they walked on their hind legs, and reasons they should do it anyway. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted January 12, 2020 Report Share Posted January 12, 2020 Snakes. Because then they would have hind legs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted January 12, 2020 Report Share Posted January 12, 2020 37 minutes ago, Michael Hopcroft said: NT: Animals that would look really weird if they walked on their hind legs, and reasons they should do it anyway. Crocodiles, because that's about the only thing we haven't belatedly seen them do yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted January 25, 2020 Report Share Posted January 25, 2020 Bumpity bump-bump=bump Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted January 25, 2020 Report Share Posted January 25, 2020 On 1/12/2020 at 6:40 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: NT: Animals that would look really weird if they walked on their hind legs, and reasons they should do it anyway. Lions. But it would prove they are the rulers of the jungle. NT: Unusual results from the Royal Rumble (This can be either the Royal Rumble matches or any of the other matches) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted January 25, 2020 Report Share Posted January 25, 2020 4 minutes ago, death tribble said: Lions. But it would prove they are the rulers of the jungle. NT: Unusual results from the Royal Rumble (This can be either the Royal Rumble matches or any of the other matches) Harry is tossed out of the ring by Charles and William. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted January 26, 2020 Report Share Posted January 26, 2020 3 hours ago, death tribble said: NT: Unusual results from the Royal Rumble (This can be either the Royal Rumble matches or any of the other matches) The Royals get tossed out of Rochester and are forced to relocate to Cincinnati. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted January 26, 2020 Report Share Posted January 26, 2020 18 hours ago, death tribble said: NT: Unusual results from the Royal Rumble (This can be either the Royal Rumble matches or any of the other matches) The last survivor is taken off to be beheaded. NT: Reasons for tourists to visit the fictional Central Asian Republic of Gatchastan. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted January 26, 2020 Report Share Posted January 26, 2020 2 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said: NT: Reasons for tourists to visit the fictional Central Asian Republic of Gatchastan. For a landlocked country, they have remarkably good clam chowder. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted January 29, 2020 Report Share Posted January 29, 2020 On 1/26/2020 at 8:41 AM, Michael Hopcroft said: The last survivor is taken off to be beheaded. NT: Reasons for tourists to visit the fictional Central Asian Republic of Gatchastan. They have some of the best BDSM clubs in the world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted January 29, 2020 Report Share Posted January 29, 2020 On 1/26/2020 at 7:41 AM, Michael Hopcroft said: NT: Reasons for tourists to visit the fictional Central Asian Republic of Gatchastan. No hassles about your diet. "No charge for extra yak fat!" NT: Gatchastani native recipes featuring yak fat. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted January 29, 2020 Report Share Posted January 29, 2020 Yak fat on rye. Parsley twig optional. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted January 29, 2020 Report Share Posted January 29, 2020 48 minutes ago, Cancer said: NT: Gatchastani native recipes featuring yak fat. Frozen into a creamy consistency and flavored. Served like ice cream, especially to random visitors who don't know any better. but Gatchastani children love it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted January 29, 2020 Report Share Posted January 29, 2020 Three words: Yak fat fondue. New Topic: The unlikely book that this summer's big blockbuster will be based on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted January 29, 2020 Report Share Posted January 29, 2020 3 minutes ago, Pariah said: Three words: Yak fat fondue. New Topic: The unlikely book that this summer's big blockbuster will be based on. Sun Tzu's Art of War Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted January 29, 2020 Report Share Posted January 29, 2020 10 minutes ago, Pariah said: New Topic: The unlikely book that this summer's big blockbuster will be based on. Emeril's Exotic Recipes: Gatchastani Yak Fat, and Friends Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted January 29, 2020 Report Share Posted January 29, 2020 3 hours ago, Pariah said: Three words: Yak fat fondue. New Topic: The unlikely book that this summer's big blockbuster will be based on. The Fictional Central Asian Republic of Gatchastan Official National Cookbook and Guide to Alcoholic Beverages (And remember, Bertrand Russell says you cannot make any true statements about the Fictional Central Asian Republic of Gatchastan.) NT: What they drink in the Fictional Central Asian Republic of Gatchastan to make living there somewhat less terrible. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted January 29, 2020 Report Share Posted January 29, 2020 8 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said: NT: What they drink in the Fictional Central Asian Republic of Gatchastan to make living there somewhat less terrible. A "Zhukov Bellywarmer": in a 1-liter mug, equal proportions neutral grain spirits, diesel fuel, and warm melted yak butter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted January 29, 2020 Report Share Posted January 29, 2020 8 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said: NT: What they drink in the Fictional Central Asian Republic of Gatchastan to make living there somewhat less terrible. Black coffee seasoned with the ashes of burnt sagebrush. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted January 31, 2020 Report Share Posted January 31, 2020 On January 28, 2020 at 10:33 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: NT: What they drink in the Fictional Central Asian Republic of Gatchastan to make living there somewhat less terrible. Pink poppy smoothies: all the opium, none of the import controls. NT: Fill in the blanks: "Dear Professor Cancer, I am an experimental physicist specializing in measurements of ___(blank #1)___ ___(blank#2)___ ___(blank #3)___ , and I am applying for the Assistant ___(blank #4)___ position in your department." Sillier the better. ("Ultracold polarized neutrons" is actually a real entry for the first three blanks.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted January 31, 2020 Report Share Posted January 31, 2020 "Dear Professor Cancer, I am an experimental physicist specializing in measurements of oblong lemon-flavored ice cubes, and I am applying for the Assistant Dog Botherer position in your department." Cancer 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted January 31, 2020 Report Share Posted January 31, 2020 "Dear Professor Cancer, I am an experimental physicist specializing in measurements of seizure-inducing anthropomorphized tardigrades , and I am applying for the Assistant Erotic Dancer Coordinator position in your department." Cancer 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.