Jump to content

Quote of the Week from my gaming group...


Darren Watts

Recommended Posts

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

From Tonight's Serenity Group 10/20/09

 

Betsy: A toxicology expert who is married to Jayne Cobb (though they don't travel on the same ship)

Nalani: The engineer that will not leave the ship without being all preened up.

Michaela: The trigger happy demolitions expert

Tyler: The drunken pilot (who actually flies better when sauced)

Radley: The scarred rich boy who's got incredible tracking/sniping skills

 

 

Betsy takes a bullet then passes out as she attempts to remove it herself (yay for being the only other person on the ship with medical expertise...)

Radley(OOC): I'm going to appraise her.

GM(OOC): Appraise?

Tyler(OOC): Her organs will probably fetch you about fifteen hundred credits.

Betsy(OOC): Well... Except for the collapsed lung.

 

Tyler was taking a nap in the skiff and an opportunistic hobo attempted to steal it. Tyler showed him his shotgun and informed him that would be a bad idea. Back on the ship, he shares his harrowing tale.

 

Tyler: You'll never believe what happened to me tonight! A sea of hobos attacked me and tried to steal the skiff!

 

Betsy: Awesome. I've always wanted to bleed to death.

Nalani: Well, you only get one shot at it, so make it count!

 

Betsy(OOC): That's why you don't keep the deed to your house in your house... Muwahahaha.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

From Tonight's Serenity Group 10/20/09

 

Betsy: A toxicology expert who is married to Jayne Cobb (though they don't travel on the same ship)

Nalani: The engineer that will not leave the ship without being all preened up.

Michaela: The trigger happy demolitions expert

Tyler: The drunken pilot (who actually flies better when sauced)

Radley: The scarred rich boy who's got incredible tracking/sniping skills

 

This group reminds me of a D&D party I was once a part of...

 

Darkiss: A bard/sorceress with a very roguish bent, whose playing gets better as she gets drunk.

Oskar: A cleric of Palor, and the only good character the party. My character.

Kel: A female half-orc barbarian whose idea of foreplay is "You'll do."

Jeanelle: Theif acrobat with a crush on the cleric.

Markus: A fighter who manages to be the front line all by himself.

 

Jeanelle has had a crush on Oskar for a while. It all started in one of the early battles when Oskar quickly became in the habit of running across the battlefield in order to heal Jeanelle right after she'd just been knocked down. Twice he saved her from death by healing her right as she dropped. Since then she's had thing for him.

 

Kel really did go into an inn, go up to a guy, look him up and down, say "You'll do." and then hoist him over her shoulder and take him upstairs to her room. And she wears a choker of pink pearls.

 

Darkiss didn't pay for lodging for the entire campaign. She gets her room comped for playing, and makes enough money in tips to more than pay for her bar tab. And she never ate anything. Just drank.

 

Oskar had no clue that Jeanelle had a crush on him. On a dungeon crawl, when the party decided that they needed to rest, the others shut the two of them up in a dead-end room and wouldn't let them out until they heard screams of ecstasy. After that Oskar stopped rooming with Markus. "It's not a celebate order!"

 

Doc

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

not gaming, but still fun.

 

after school in the afternoon, my bus is approaching a speed bump.

 

just before we get there I shush the children,

speed the bus up ever so slightly,

and yell "listen, listen..."

 

of course there's a loud ka-chunk - kachunk

as we roll over the bump.

 

then into the silence I announce to the children: We just ran over a unicorn.

 

there's mixed cries of YEAHH! and YAY!! and Oh No!

and the inevitable argument between groups of

"that's so gross" and "there's no such thing"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

not gaming' date=' but still fun.[/i']

 

after school in the afternoon, my bus is approaching a speed bump.

 

just before we get there I shush the children,

speed the bus up ever so slightly,

and yell "listen, listen..."

 

of course there's a loud ka-chunk - kachunk

as we roll over the bump.

 

then into the silence I announce to the children: We just ran over a unicorn.

 

there's mixed cries of YEAHH! and YAY!! and Oh No!

and the inevitable argument between groups of

"that's so gross" and "there's no such thing"

 

 

You are an evil, evil man. :mad:

 

Ah, who am I kidding? Down right hi-larious! :lol:

 

Repped. :thumbup:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

not gaming' date=' but still fun.[/i']

 

after school in the afternoon, my bus is approaching a speed bump.

 

just before we get there I shush the children,

speed the bus up ever so slightly,

and yell "listen, listen..."

 

of course there's a loud ka-chunk - kachunk

as we roll over the bump.

 

then into the silence I announce to the children: We just ran over a unicorn.

 

there's mixed cries of YEAHH! and YAY!! and Oh No!

and the inevitable argument between groups of

"that's so gross" and "there's no such thing"

I'd give you evil rep, but I must spread more around. :help:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

On Weldun's Champions Online character Professor Grey, a diabolist who is finding himself under considerable demand from demons wanting contracts that'll get them out of hell. The Chinese afterlife, with its rigid rules and red tape, offers a few good paths that way.

 

Me
: You have to admire a culture that's had red tape so long that its
afterlife
is a bureaucracy

 

Weldun
: I'm basically Dr Phil for demons

Reece
( in Dr. Phil voice ) : No! You've got to work out your aggression issues! Don't hit him and eat his soul!... do you have some father issues?

 

 

Edge City team, winding up the cross--dimensional chase after Black Paladin & Talisman. Currently in the RIFTS universe

 

Trawler : 12-ft tall, about the same wide

Terminus : Genetic warrior, now with a family of clone-brothers

Avatar : Autonomous fragment of the Sun, and mobile Chernobyl

Stentorian : Big-mouth bass, woofer, sub-woofer, sub-sub-sub-woofer, tectonic woofer, and Brown Note speakers

Zero : Won't use his powers for evil - unless he's in his civilian ID

 

Trawler
: How do we explain why we came back short a team member?

Me
: She was adopted as a goddess by a tribe of pygmy sloths.

 

Weldun, GM
: They've got a naval base in the northern Missouri. River, that is.

Me
: Be a bit odd to have a naval base in the Missouri Hills.

 

Avatar detects another energy being, but this one is wearing a body suit.

 

Avatar
: Another Blaze? Good for them.

Weldun, GM
: And one with modesty, too.

Trawler
: A blaze called Modesty?
:D

Zero
: Arghh. Arh.
*moan* *facepalm*

Weldun, GM
: Your fault, you listened

 

Avatar is learning to cook

 

Zero
: Now, I know you're an energy being, and we're organic, carbon-based entities... But that does
not
mean we eat charcoal.

 

Weldun, GM
: ...And this this was a well-timed, properly coordinated attack.

Zero
: For once.

Weldun, GM
: Who are you people and what have you done with The Edge?

 

Trawler objects to a Grrgoyle officer's attempt to prevent their fighting retreat becoming a rout, by throwing one of the earlier casualties at him

 

NPC
: We are Grrgoyle! We shall not surrender! We shall not run! We shall not
*CRUNCH*

Trawler
: Ah, shaddup!

 

 

And in Cthulhu, Paddy McGinty & psychiatric nurse Amy Wells spend a week at Lucy Kennedy's place, getting to know the neighbours. Tormenting Lucy about her Deep One relatives was fun, too.

 

Me, GM
: Looking a bit green around the gills there...

 

Me, GM
: And Lucy here
does
drink like a fish
:eg:

 

The party continue to learn more of the rules of survival in CoC

 

Me, GM
: Yes, about the way you 'acquired' that Packard... this isn't D&D - the rule isn't 'Kill ugly people and take their stuff', it's 'Kill ugly people and burn the place to the ground as you flee'

Paddy McGinty
: Hey, we let that mansion last week burn didn't we?

Me, GM
: And that one in Innsmouth, too...

Lucy Smith
: What about that one with the mummy? We burnt that, didn't we?

Me, GM
: Nope.

Lucy Smith
: No?

Me, GM
: No. You just set the occupant on fire.

 

Just the sort of conversation to make Amy rethink her association with these people....

 

Me, GM
to
Amy
: You're running into more dangerous lunatics on your days off than you do working at the asylum.

Paddy McGinty
: And out here we have tommyguns!

 

Paddy McGinty wants to experiment with the Last Trump and resurrect Lucy's Uncle Gregory

 

Paddy McGinty
: Then he'll be a ... Fish undead... raccoon camel thing.

Lucy Smith OOC
: Don't forget naked mole

 

The description of the thing they ran into last week gets slightly convoluted too, as they try to explain what happened, to Lucy.

 

Paddy McGinty
: There was this monkey thing.

Amy Wells
: Conjoined twin.

Paddy McGinty
: Monkey thing!

Amy Wells
: We couldn't see it over the steering wheel...

Me, GM
: So, an invisible conjoined monkey twin...

Paddy McGinty
: It also looked like a kidney

Weldun
,
passing by
: Only because it was curled into the foetal position! ... how is it that I've only known you a few weeks and can guess that detail?

 

I also managed to reduce my players to slack-jawed horror with some of the descriptions, which is always gratifying.

 

Amy Wells's Player
: You know I'm going to have nightmares about this tonight, don't you?

Me, GM
: Great! I can show you the picture again, if you like
:eg:

 

... and squicked two of them emulating Lucy's mother. Simply by stretching my eyelids apart as far as they'll go, and STARING

 

Ethical conflict was enjoyable for me, too. It's one thing gunning down some hybrid nurse you've never met before, but it's another thing entirely when it's an NPC you've known for years, and the GM has been mentioning what a popular neighbour he is since the start of the campaign - BWAHAHAHAHA

 

Lucy Smith
: Not Bernie! He's practically family! No wait, you shoot my family...He's a friend! A friend!

Paddy McGinty
: I don't care! You've never met a man crazier! Well, YOU [
to Amy
] might have

 

Paddy McGinty
: Look at the state [Lucy's] in, dribbling all over herself... well, that's normal - but she isn't drunk this time!

 

Paddy McGinty
: Use your brain, gel - what's going to happen if we do call the police again? 'Why, hello there, officer, could you come back over, our neighbor's been cutting people into bits and bobs and sewing 'em up again into things with two arms and a leg and no torso' - ' Why certainly sir, wait right there and we'll send a nice van around with a nice white jacket just for you' and then it'll be two big bastards and a needle in me bum and off to to the loony bin

 

Paddy McGinty
: Confucius say : Walk softly and carry a big stick. I don't have a stick but this here revolver is a dandy substitute

 

Me, GM
: You wake up tied to Lucy's bed with silk handkerchiefs

Paddy McGinty
: Aw dammit, now why don't I remember any of this?

 

And to my further delight, Paddy accidentally murders a suspect

 

Me, GM
: You just beat a man to death in your pyjamas... 'But what was he doing in my pyjamas?'

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

From last night's Monster Hunters game:

 

*****

 

Zeke: There's bad things in the swamp?

 

Sonia: Well, we're going to be there.

 

*****

 

Mike: I hear voices.

 

Julian: Voices?

 

Mike: Yeah, voices. And not in my head. Over that way.

 

*****

 

Kayla: I do an impressive thing.

 

*****

 

Mike (to Kayla): Hush. You're hiding.

 

*****

 

Sonia: We just fell out of Blair Witch into Disney.

 

*****

 

Sonia: That was for the raccoon!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

From the epic conclusion of our Star Wars game:

 

The Cast:

 

Zog: The GM

Me: Playing Krys, human female gunsligner

Richard: Playing Kaz, Zabrak male bounty hunter

Andrew: Playing Rip Kong, human male Jedi

Max: Playing Scott, human male Jedi

 

IC comments proceeded with character names, OOC ones with player names)

 

Scene: The Penultimate Fight – our heroes vs father-and-daughter Sith guys

(Daughter turns; Dad turns on her, but gets three misses – followed by a fatal critical hit)

Andrew: The Pathos of the d20

 

(Dad gets lured into a bomb trap that he set up but thought we disarmed)

Krys: I gave him the Explodo because I am clever

 

(Dad gets stabbed through with Rip's saber)

Me: Shot through the heart, and you're to blame- (is pelted)

 

Scene: The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny. Big Bad and two henchmen

 

(Henchman tries to shot Krys, is doing a passable job)

Krys: The difference between you and me is that I do a lot of damage with a single shot. (Natural 20, kills them dead) See?

 

(Rip uses Enhance Ability, gets a Natural 20)

Andrew: OOOH! Crick Crack Knuckles

 

(Rip unleashes a flurry of Lightsaber hits)

Andrew: 99 Damage. Dammit.

 

(Kaz sneaks up on the master villain)

Zog: A vicious snarl comes over her face. "You ruined it!"

Kaz: Excelent

Andrew: I predict Force Lightning in your future.

 

(Krys hits for a lot of damage)

Me: And this is what happens when Krys makes an effort rather then just filling the air with... little.. beams of light

 

(Kaz is run through and dies instantly; like, -29 HP dies instantly)

Me: You were going to retire, move to the country and buy a Gronk

Andrew: Did that Force Lighting hit you?

Richard: Yes

Andrew: Did it hurt?

Richard: I shrugged it off. I'm a Zabrak and I'm tough

Me: Not tough enough

Richard: Yeah, what with being stuck through with a Lightsaber for the second time today

 

(Krys is a bit upset)

Krys: You broke into the temple, messed with the force and killed That Zabrak Guy. Now I'm really mad!

 

(Villain gets hit a lot, force energy flares around her)

Rip: She's got golden tentacally Sith love happening

Krys: I can't see golden tentacally Sith love.

Andrew: Write that one down

Me: I can't! I'm rolling damage!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Rule One

 

The PCs are an official UN team.

Cast of characthers...

John Henry: density brick

Kooun Kaze: gravity energy projector

Saulk: mystic with healing powers

 

The team has learned that they'll be facing zombies, so they lay down some ground rules.

Kooun Kaze: "Rule One -- we stay together."

 

The heroes overturned their jeep when John Henry accidentally crashed it into a large group of zombies. Kooun Kaze bailed out before the crash. John Henry got out of the jeep just after the crash. Saulk remained buckled in the jeep and started attacking the zombies.

John Henry: (to Saulk) "Are you going to get out of the jeep?"

Saulk ignored John Henry and continued attacking the zombies.

John Henry (ooc): I pick up the jeep and move towards Kooun Kaze.

Saulk (ooc): That I notice.

John Henry (ooc): Are you doing something that requires that much concentration?

Saulk (ooc): No. I just figured that zombies were more interesting than whatever you were doing.

John Henry (ooc): I'm remember Rule One.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

From the epic conclusion of our Star Wars game:

 

The Cast:

 

Zog: The GM

Me: Playing Krys, human female gunsligner

Richard: Playing Kaz, Zabrak male bounty hunter

Andrew: Playing Rip Kong, human male Jedi

Max: Playing Scott, human male Jedi

!

 

Rip Kong?!?

 

With a name like that, one can almost hear the excess testosterone sloshing around in his shoes.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Rip Kong?!?

 

With a name like that, one can almost hear the excess testosterone sloshing around in his shoes.

 

Can't you just?

 

Rip was deliberately played silly by a player who knows better but likes to have fun. He was a full-tilt crazy with a tendancy to wave arounf the glowystick first, ask questions later. He was probably the most "loon" of the team, being (mostly) kept in check by Scott.

 

Well, save for this one quote:

 

Rip: We need to be diplomatic

Scott: I'll get more grenades

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Some quotes from the Rune Peaks campaign, being run in Pathfinder.

 

Anushka: Fighter-rogue from the Cairnwood (a gothy place where its always overcast). (Picture Milla Jovovitch from "5th Element" in black leather harness)

ANUSHKA-Fighter-Rogue-01.jpg

 

Xasha: A Bard/Priestess of the Raven Queen from the Cairnwood (Picture Jennifer Connelly from "the Rocketeer" in a bare-tummy outfit made of black leather and raven feathers)

XASHA-PriestessofRavenQueen-000.jpg

 

Azyrabett: Lapith (deer centaur who can change to a bipedal form) ranger. (Picture Mena Suvari with flowers in her hair and lil antlers)

(No picture yet)

 

------------------------------------------------

 

The group is discussing various advantages of playing in Pathfinder rather than 4E

 

Azyrabett (OOC): In 4E you can run into a dragon at 1st level. A 1st level dragon! My little sister can smother one by rolling over on it in her sleep!

 

---------------

 

Anushka (OOC): Deer are not known for their interaction skills.

 

-----------

 

GM: Does anyone speak NPC?.....I mean Dwarven! Does anyone speak Dwarven! :o

 

------------

 

Xasha: We were attacked by Grimlocks.

 

Trader: We were ambushed by Gargoyles while trading with a Giant

 

Azyrabett (OOC): Were any other attacks made by creatures that begin with "G"? Cause if so we know what part of the Monster Manual to study up on :sneaky:

 

-------------

 

Xasha (OOC): *Confused* Whatever I did, Im nearly sure that I did it

 

--------------

 

GM: *Looking for lost notes* Its really bad when you know just exactly how low your Wisdom score is...

 

-------

 

GM: All right! Lets start the combat!

 

Azyrabett (OOC): ...I am full of comfort food and ready for a nap

 

------------

 

Xasha (OOC): "SAY HELLO TO MY LITTLE FLIND!"

 

-----------

 

GM: Along the path, across the stream, you see numerous humaoid heads nailed to the trees.

 

Azyrabett (OOC): Whats that up in the road?

 

Anushka and Xasha (OOC): A head! :D *

 

(*From a British actors' game where you totally change the meaning of a line by changing the emphasis of your pronunciation)

 

------------

 

Bugbear: Kill the men and capture the women!

 

Anushka: *Performs an impressive display of her weapons prowess with her bladed chain, demoralizing the Goblin footsoldiers*

 

Goblin 1: ...Did he say kill the men and run away from the women?

 

Goblin 2: No! He said kill the plan and run away like women!

 

----------------

 

Xasha: *Breathless after running to rejoin the group* I killed a Goblin with a Sleep spell!

 

Anushka: How?!

 

Xasha: It fell out of a very large tree :D

 

----------

 

GM: The Goblin's armor bounces a sling-stone. He looks surprised and thumps his armor a couple of times, then says "Huh! I thought that stuff was just to make me uncomfortable!"

 

-------------

 

Azyrabett (OOC): I hit him so hard his momma dont remember him anymore! :D

 

--------------------

 

GM: Well, it IS worth noting that....well....no, I was wrong. Its NOT worth noting.

 

(We never found out what it was that wasnt worth noting)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Some quotes from the Rune Peaks campaign, being run in Pathfinder.

 

Anushka: Fighter-rogue from the Cairnwood (a gothy place where its always overcast). (Picture Milla Jovovitch from "5th Element" in black leather harness)

ANUSHKA-Fighter-Rogue-01.jpg

 

Xasha: A Bard/Priestess of the Raven Queen from the Cairnwood (Picture Jennifer Connelly from "the Rocketeer" in a bare-tummy outfit made of black leather and raven feathers)

XASHA-PriestessofRavenQueen-000.jpg

 

 

Oh, my.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

It's a recipe for songbird. As in, cooking. Part of it involves plucking feathers.

 

 

...Obviously, NesterDRod is a cannibal.

 

Why? Because I consider Xasha... pluckable? :sneaky:

 

Another tune comes to mind...

 

"Why smilest thou, Lord Dragon, sir?

Asked our hero in armor laden.

Why, you’d smile too, the worm replied,

If you’d just eaten a maiden."

 

:D

 

...

 

Could someone please turn the Smut Field off in here? Thank you.

 

:winkgrin:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...