Supervillain Monologues

[TheQuestionMan]

Greetings Herophiles, I need your help. I have observed that my own Supervillain Monologues have been lacking style. Please help a uncreative GM out.

 

Give me you best Supervillain Monologues or a link to your favourite Resource.

 

Thanks

 

QM

[Snake Gandhi]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

I can't remember any specific monolouge, but the best I ever had was a villian of mine called Negative Man. He was fun because he simple rambled, passionately mind you, in just random directions sometime while working his own catchphrases into the mix somewhere. Occasionly he would stop in mid sentance to fire a Nega-Blast at the wall or smash the ground with his fist, then continue on like nothing had happened. He was "the plane crashing, building smashing, team busting ayatolla of power. He'd fight all night, then fight a little longer, and all the ladies wanted to ride Nega Mountain, cause he was the the man, and to be the man, you gotta beat the man! Woooo!"

 

(Anyone who's a wrestling fan, I ripped him off nearly whole cloth from Ric Flair, even down to the trademark Wooo! the players, who weren't wrestling fans and didn't have a clue who Flair was, loved it.)

[boomer]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

There is a book out called "How to be a Villan", not sure of the author....it is loaded with stuff...I think it even has a Monologue generator....not sure though....it's a great book...

[TheQuestionMan]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

Hmmm... Cute, but this is not it.

 

List of references in Neopets

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_references_in_Neopets

 

Please find that book.

 

QM

[Supreme Serpent]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

I normally wind up doing them off the cuff, but here's one I wrote up a while back to use in a game.

 

Background - alternate reality where Soviets took over, and expanded to other worlds - campaign Earth next on the list. Soviet superteam with agent support is using broadcast of the 2004 Oscars to get their message out and herald in the invasion.

 

After start of ceremonies, back curtain will pull back, and USSR supers will come out. “Security Guards†will lock off the building from outside.

**Ivan will take mic from Billy Crystal.

“Greetings, Capitalist Running Dogs! I…am Uncle Ivan, and my comrades and I represent the USSR – the Union of Soviet Socialist Realities, a noble worker’s paradise that your world will soon be joining. I assure you, those of you not judged to be counterrevolutionary threats will find it as pleasant as your counterparts on the worlds already within the USSR.

“As I speak here, my words beamed across this world, other forces of the USSR are taking other action to secure this planet for the People. We regret that the use of force has become necessary, but the Imperialist Reactionary Lackeys who run most of your governments would not willingly allow us to bring you the true freedom of our perfect Communist Society. If you are one of the soldiers tasked to defend Washington, Moscow, London, or other targets – do not resist! Do not die defending an outmoded corrupt system against the just forces of four worlds! Join us as the Liberators we are!

“And soon…here…to show the swiftness of Revolutionary Justice…these bloated, corrupt, decadent ticks on the back of society…these ‘Hollywood’ elites…with their mansions, their pet therapists, their drug habits that could pay to feed every child in the world…will be executed. They are ALL GUILTY!!!! (except, I am told, for this ‘Michael Moore’ – you may go) GUILTY OF TREASON AGAINST THE PEOPLE!! GUILTY OF PERPETRATING THE LIES OF OPPRESSION!!! GUILTY!!! AND YOU SHALL ALL PAY WITH YOUR LIVES!!!â€

[boomer]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0811846660/qid=1136326914/sr=2-1/ref=pd_bbs_b_2_1/102-1276047-4028156?s=books&v=glance&n=283155

 

Here it is....

[Lord Liaden]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

My character monologues tend to be fairly short, but pithy. Probably my favorite was for Lung Hung, the "Red Dragon" from VOICE of Doom: "Among my people, the dragon is second only to the gods in magnificence and power. You shall now witness the truth of this."

 

I'll see what else I can remember.

[zornwil]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

I can't think of monologues themselves, I do them off the cuff when I do them. They usually seem to work. I think the most important thing is motivation, why the villain does what he does, and from there his style as secondary. Also, keep in mind why the villain wants to tell the heroes anything - what does he really want from them? I find the deeper you get inside the head of the villain and the more you think about his world view and his background, the rest comes naturally, including monologuing (if he even is a monologue type).

[Hermit]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

Monologues depend a lot on who the villain is, what he is doing, and the reason he's monologing... and then, the 'feel' of your setting and campaign. A silver age would be world conquerer is going to be very different from an iron age psychopath.

[Gummibear]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

Come on Ghost. Pull that notebook of Koh's out and let fly. I think that I might possibly have had some good ones. Maybe one or two that made the entire group emotional.

[Hermit]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

Mmm, Dr. Doom has some good ones in the old style:

 

"Pain? Pain is like love . . . like compassion! It is a thing only for lesser men. What is pain to Doom?"

or

 

"A Renoir. I have three myself. I had four, but ordered one burned . . . It displeased me."

[Matt Frisbee]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

Maul (a big bad brick):

"If that's the best you've got, you're going to need help, hero!"

"Go ahead and stand your ground -- that's as good a place as any to bury you!"

 

Arctica (a cold-themed energy projector):

"My heartbeat quickens in anticipation of stilling yours."

"Beware my embrace, hero, for it veils the icy fingers of death."

 

Buzzsaw (a metahuman assassin with hyper-vibration powers):

"I don't know how I'm going to feel after killing you -- either saddened for the loss of a brave soul or happy that I've rid the earth of another costumed idiot!"

"If you can't die with grace and dignity, then just stand still so I can get this over with quickly!"

 

Those are a few gems I remember off of the top of my (balding) head...

 

Matt "I-make-a-lousy-villain-'cause-I-keep-getting-jacked-during-my monologues" Frisbee

[TheQuestionMan]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

"Never violate a woman, nor harm a child. Do not lie, cheat or steal.

These things are for lesser men.

Protect the weak against the evil strong.

And never allow thoughts of gain to lead you into the pursuit of evil.

Never back away from an enemy. Either fight or surrender.

It is not enough to say I will not be evil. Evil must be fought wherever it is found."

 

---The "Iron Code" of Druss

[Narratio]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

I remember one, I think was ripped off from 'Die Hard'. My character was captured and a mixed crew of PC's and NPC's were attempting a rescue. Having caught the NPC hero 'Nighthawk' by surprise, doing lots of damage and stunning him with an immense 24d6 energy blast, Mr.Smith ("Just call me Smith, you don't need to know anymore than that") started his monolog.

 

"Ah, Nighthawk! As usual, you're just in time to try and disrupt my plan... Hmmm, is that a new costume? Very nice. Who made it? Is that lewis' work? As you know I get mine from Lewis down in Blackmoor park. He does nice work does he not? He told me once that he also tailors for the Dancing Bandit and Destructo!"

(Bends to finger the material)

"Ah well, much as I'd love to stand here and discuss fashion and accoutrements with you, I've a city to destoy. It's been such a pleasure seeing you again... goodbye!"

 

The following 24d6 EB attack against the stunned and prostrate hero left a very large hole in the concrete that took a long time to repair.

[Gummibear]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

They are ALL GUILTY!!!! (except' date=' I am told, for this ‘Michael Moore’ – you may go) GUILTY OF TREASON AGAINST THE PEOPLE!! GUILTY OF PERPETRATING THE LIES OF OPPRESSION!!! GUILTY!!! AND YOU SHALL ALL PAY WITH YOUR LIVES!!!â€[/font'][/size]

 

Well of course they need Michael Moore-someone has to run the propoganda machine.

[wrestlinggeek]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

Wrsetlers are great for monologue inspiration. I especially recommend Ric Flair and The Rock. I will never forget one match against Mick Folley. The Rock took the match out of the ring, grabbed a headset from the announcers' table, put it on, and started to do both play-by-play and color commentarie for his own match.

 

My other suggestion is Ozzymandias' monlogue from "Watchmen." Someone has it quoted in his sig. It ends with (paraphrasing), "Do it? I'm not some Republic Serial villain. I would never have revealed my master stroke if there was the slightest chance of you stopping it. I did it 35 minutes ago."

 

Oh, "The Incredibles" was great too.

[John T]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0811846660/qid=1136326914/sr=2-1/ref=pd_bbs_b_2_1/102-1276047-4028156?s=books&v=glance&n=283155

 

Here it is....

I've had the first one for a while now; it's an absolute riot.

 

Need to order The Villain's Guide to Better Living.

[John T]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

The PCs had gone to the Netherworld to rescue one of their teammates from the clutches of a demon prince, and succeeded with great difficulty. Months later, the same demon breached the barriers between dimensions and came through with a legion of minions.

 

"Of course you 'rescued' your comrade and 'defeated' me... that was part of 'the Plan'!"

[Susano]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

Mongul had some of the best in the pre-Crisis story "For the Man Who Has Everything."

 

"Congragulations, Kryptonian. I give you, oblivion."

 

"To be polite, which of you should I kill first?"

 

"Is that a neural impactor? I suggest the plasm disrupter. It's ligher, more of a woman's weapon."

 

"If you don't already know my name, you're not worthy of an introduction."

 

Personally, I've always liked the quote I came up with for Shion Nys in the Kazei 5 source book.

 

"Perhaps, I should kill you. I do have a reputation to uphold, after all."

[ThothAmon]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

One of my faves comes from a David Gemmell story (may he rest in peace). I'll paraphrase:

 

The hero takes a mighty punch from his opponent and responds "If that's the best you've got laddie you are in deep trouble!"

[Black Omega]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

I've always found I have fun with monologues when I have a clear idea in mind what they are trying to do. A few monologues, like Lt. Van Winkle explaining to the group was New Orleans was being destroyed, I partially scripted. Other's like Max waxing eloquent about the benefits of weaponizing the supernatural, were simply off the cuff based on the character's ideas.

 

Pro wrestler Mick Foley wrote in his book that he tries to avoid memorizing a monologue word for word, he just created a few phrases to use and got it clear in his mind what he was trying to accomplish.

[Hermit]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

Hornet's girlfriend, upon hearing there was a guy with a way to grant powers, and wanting to be part of her love's life decides to give it a try.

 

Unfortunately, the powerbroker in this case is none other than Teleios. Hornet later comes to the rescue. Snippets of the villain's monologue to the tiny hero are below:

 

"Idiot, I will improve her...she is but a canvas for me to work upon. Even now, the capacity for latent mutations in her have been brought to the fore. The headset she wears ensures a more, agreeable and agressive persona! Fit to serve me. She wanted power, why I Do not know, but she shall have it, only on -my- terms!"

 

"Perhaps, when she is done, I will take your little radioactive harlot, and she'll pleasure herself upon me, so you may understand the nuances of the term 'Alpha male'. I assure you, the new her will enjoy it." The man smirks .

[jkwleisemann]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

Mmm... I've had a few that I like, though the general guidelines that have been given are pretty good.

 

Unfortunately, I can't remember the exact wording (or even general wording) of most of them... though I'm working on a couple good ones for use in some of my current campaigns.

[Chimpira]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

I found this one when I was going through my Viper book. Viper-X delivered this after he killed All-American at The Battle of Washington in my campaign. (A little background: Another GM was running a game in my world and it went in directions that I had problems with. The other players were pretty much scratching their heads as well. He ran Viper as the big dope. I could overlook a single cell doing something as dumb as they were doing but not when it affected the whole country. Our characters did not even break a sweat as we beat the villians down. The only problem was that he did not think about the ramifications of what he did and I came up with a story to fill in some of the gaps. What happened next became The Battle of Washington. Suffice it to say, Viper is a very scary thing in my game world.)

 

"Who do you think we are? Has it been so long since we have shown our united strength in this land? Have you truly forgottened what we are capable of? Are you so gullible that anyone claiming to be VIPER is accepted as VIPER? We have looked on in amusement as others have claimed to be a part of our legion. Small people without the courage or power to stand on their own. People that cringe at their own shadow. And when they are found out for what they are, we shake our heads in disgust, but we have allowed it. Until now.

 

Someone has stepped over the bounds. Someone has mistakened our generousity as weakness. And what is worse is that you poor fools have allowed yourselves to be deceived. We do not care that your so called Secretary of Defense was taught a lesson in humility nor that you shook in fear of a radioactive nightmare that was so easily averted.

 

We care that these acts were done in our names and that you thought it was true. We care that you believe the terror that you experienced was on par with what VIPER is truly capable of. The Supreme Serpent felt that it was necessary to remind you of who we really are, for you have so obviously forgottened. Dwell on that as PRIMUS stands dumbfounded. As your symbol of pride lies dead at my feet. And as your capitol burns.

 

Hail VIPER."

[Matt Frisbee]

Re: Supervillain Monologues

 

The Technophile (high-tech intellectual snob supervillain)

"Before you jump in, hero, consider who you are defending! My device will kill off that useless debris of civilization -- those mouth breathing idiots who buy everything they see on television only to fill the landfills of the world when their infintesimal attention spans find something else to fixate upon! It is that moronic section of the world that wastes everything from time to non-renewable resources in non-productive pursuits that designed to draw attention to themselves in a vain attempt to prop up their own over-inflated egos! Humanity will never fulfill its destiny of inheriting the great stellar frontier if we're saddled with these adle-brained, idle-timing loafers who only know how to consume without contributing to the whole of humanity's greatness! You should be helping me, not opposing me! For I represent the one hope that humanity has of achieving the true greatness for which it is destined -- the great calamady which will reforge mankind's priorities and finally unite the survivors into a true union of effort to strive for something bigger and better than themselves! Can you not see that this purging of the waste products of a permissive society is the only way we can save humanity from its own weaknesses? Are they really worth the effort of protecting when you know full well that most of the problems society has today are a direct result of world governments coddling, manipulating and contributing to the overall stupidity of the human race? Is that what your really stand for, hero?! Or are you trying to make the world a better place, as I am? I admit that my methods are extreme, but it is only by this great catastrophy that humanity will be shocked into doing what needs to be done for the good of all mankind!"

 

Matt "The-long-winded-GM" Frisbee