Pariah Posted July 25, 2022 Report Share Posted July 25, 2022 “I had a lot more fun being 20 in the 70s than I’m having being 70 in the 20s.” - Joe Walsh Cancer 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted July 31, 2022 Report Share Posted July 31, 2022 "It is your reaction to adversity, not the adversity itself, that determines how your life's story will develop." ~Dieter F. Uchtdorf Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted August 4, 2022 Report Share Posted August 4, 2022 "Doing four things s--tily is not my idea of versatility." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted August 5, 2022 Report Share Posted August 5, 2022 "Why would I take life-coaching advice from someone who doesn't have a life?" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted August 18, 2022 Report Share Posted August 18, 2022 "I was taught to think before I act. So if I smack the crap out of you, rest assured that I have given the matter due consideration and am confident in my decision." Tom Cowan and tkdguy 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted August 24, 2022 Report Share Posted August 24, 2022 "My problem is that Sauron is a dick." "Isn't that kind a requirement for being a Dark Lord?" Pariah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted September 2, 2022 Report Share Posted September 2, 2022 My favorite part was when Legolas took the red pill and said: "hasta la vista baby!" right before destroying the Death Star at the end of the Chamber of Secrets -- Comment seen on YouTube Cancer 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted September 13, 2022 Report Share Posted September 13, 2022 Wine is not a gift. It's a tool for surviving life. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted September 15, 2022 Report Share Posted September 15, 2022 "I had not previously recognized how strongly the word "enterpreneurship" dulls my awareness." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IndianaJoe3 Posted September 18, 2022 Report Share Posted September 18, 2022 "I've always wanted a steam-powered duck." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 3, 2022 Report Share Posted October 3, 2022 Be careful with your vowels, especially when they are adjacent to each other on a standard keyboard. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted October 7, 2022 Report Share Posted October 7, 2022 While touching up an old miniature: "Help me, Dark Angels Green; you're my only hope!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted October 8, 2022 Report Share Posted October 8, 2022 (series of texts) "O gardener daughter of mine, do we have a hoe?" "O ho!! A very good question father dear" "& if so where ought I look for it?" "I'm not sure that we do, i think it's one of the tools that has disintegrated over time but. If we do have it I would think it would be in the corner of the shed" "I am mixing & pouring the concrete for the post, & that seems like the best tool" "I agree!" "It's a stiff mix: 3 quarts water to 1 bag of mix" <several minutes later> "In the shed looks like shovels 3, rakes 2, hoes 0. OK, see what I can do. Thx." "0 hoes at the [our name] household <downcast emoji>" "*obnoxious voice* I raised our womenfolk right!" Pariah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted October 9, 2022 Report Share Posted October 9, 2022 "As an engineer, I try to learn from the mistakes of people who take my advice." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted October 15, 2022 Report Share Posted October 15, 2022 "Always stand up for what you believe in, even if it means standing alone." ~Kim Hanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 5, 2022 Report Share Posted November 5, 2022 "A bowling cult?" "It makes sense in context." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted November 6, 2022 Report Share Posted November 6, 2022 "If I were immortal like a vampire, I'd like to be able to choose my age." "I'd want to be rich." "Why are vampires in fiction always rich? What about vampires who are stupid with their money?" "I'd just stay in the cemetery and come out at night." "That's boring! I still want to be able to watch movies." "So drink their blood then steal their wallets. Be a vampire mugger." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 8, 2022 Report Share Posted November 8, 2022 "Whosoever pulleth the stick from your butt deserveth to be crowned King of England, Luther." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 22, 2022 Report Share Posted November 22, 2022 "If God dwells inside us like some people say, I sure hope He likes enchiladas, because that's what He's getting." -Jack Handey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 22, 2022 Report Share Posted November 22, 2022 "The older I get, the more I understand why roosters start their day off screaming." L. Marcus 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ternaugh Posted November 24, 2022 Report Share Posted November 24, 2022 "I either need to get a haircut, or I need to commit to the mullet." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 24, 2022 Report Share Posted November 24, 2022 The school's D&D club meets in my classroom after school on Mondays. This exchange took place after a careless party earned themselves a TPK: Me: So, is there some sequel upcoming where the characters all return via editorial fiat? DM: Yes, they'll all be back next week. Player: So I don't have to create a new character? DM: No, you'll be brought back.... Me: [DM name] has a Miracle Man on retainer. Player: I'm glad my character's not dead. DM: You're not dead, but since you didn't complete the quest, you just don't get the rewards. Me: Before the Miracle Man brought you back, he went through your pockets and checked for loose change. < Smirks from the Player and DM > Me: I'll stop now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 24, 2022 Report Share Posted November 24, 2022 "There are three types of men. The one who learns from reading. The few who learn by observation. These rest have to pee on the electric fence for themselves." ~Will Rogers Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted November 27, 2022 Report Share Posted November 27, 2022 ... flea bites and mockery. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted November 27, 2022 Report Share Posted November 27, 2022 "I'm so offended when my body decides to be sick. I gave you a vegetable last week, how dare you?!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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