Tigereye Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Our new power-suiter, in a "World of Jade" (Gold Digger) Hero Game gets sent to Jade after a villain englobes him in a gigantic bubble gum bubble. He has to spend a round stuck to the floor with the power, which is also an Entangle: Casey, my character: "Sounds like a bubble gum crisis." Everyone groans, and some accuse me of doing something OOC, but then Casey proceeds to give him advice as to how to remove bubble gum from metal. (He is a 1969 Chevrolet Corvair, after all. He knows lots of tips.) ----- Different game, different week: Champions game, with Deuce, at a horse show with Heather McGowrie, better known as the villainess Cateran, who wants to put the moves on him. She gives him the dumb-girl come-on (which Deuce already knows is a complete crock as she's an expert rider, but is playing along because he wants to know why she's coming onto him): Heather McGowrie: "But all the different types! Classical, military, competitive, artistic, free-style, Spanish, combined... what do you call a horse that does more than one?" Deuce (dryly): "A cross-dressager." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Major Tom Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... From the Origins of Power Teen Champions game tonight: GM (OOC): "Yeah, armor. He's wearing a cup. What good is armor if it doesn't protect the baby-maker?" --------------------------------- Panther (OOC): "He just shot my boy-band crush in the chest in front of me, and tried to shoot me. I'm just thinking what I would actually do if I was hanging out with Johnny Depp and someone tried to hurt him." Joshua (OOC): "Let his bodyguard handle it?" Panther (OOC): "No. I'm kicking this guy square in the nuts. Full force." GM (OOC): "Remember, you have a 50 strength. That's roughly 25 tons of force right in the mommy-daddy button." Panther (OOC): "That's kinda the point." GM: "Okay, roll." Panther: :rolls: "Okay... is a 4 good?" (Panther's character has never played Champions before. Tonight was literally her first session) Rest of the table: :Gasps, males cringe, the other girl at the table grins wickedly: Buntai-Kun (OOC): "You nearly crit. That's very good." GM (OOC): :still cringing a bit: "Right in the 13s... Okay, roll damage." :rolls are made, damage is calculated: "Okay... 33 Stun after armor... and the 13s are a..." :looks at combat record sheet: "Egads! Times 4 STUN multiplier..." :looks at Joshua's player, or resident human calculator: "How much is 33 times 4?" Joshua (OOC): "Lots... roughly in the neighborhood of 130." GM: "Yeah. He's out of the fight. VERY out of the fight. You line up the kick, punt him right in the crotch, literally knock his dangly bits up into his throat, and..." Tzalan (interrupting, OOC): "What's the penalty for walking around with your foot literally wedged into another human being?" GM: "Ahem. The sheer force of it launches him a block and a half down the street. At the end of the next segment, he stops sliding, and enjoys his GM's Discretion." Panther (grinning fiercely): "I LIKE THIS GAME!" ---------------------------------- Tzalan is an extradimensional being, with very little understanding of human culture and traditions and... uhm, functions. He's posessing a human host body, and often forgets he can access the host bodys memories for clues. The Twins are genetically created psychic super-soldiers. The company who made them has sent a recovery team to get back their property, and assisting this team is a Special Forces unit, a set of identical twin 8 year olds, their powers more refined than the Twins. After a fairly long combat, the recovery team is routed and the PCs get away. The Twins tell Tzalan that the children were a newer model of them, making Tzalan think humans have production lines. Tzalan: :to Panther: "Were you built by Ford?" Panther: "What?" Gemini (The team's organizer and government liason): "Don't mind him. He's... damaged." Panther's got a great future ahead of her... as a recruiter for the Vienna Boys' Choir. Major Tom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Mackinder Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Panther (OOC): "He just shot my boy-band crush in the chest in front of me, and tried to shoot me. I'm just thinking what I would actually do if I was hanging out with Johnny Depp and someone tried to hurt him." Joshua (OOC): "Let his bodyguard handle it?" Panther (OOC): "No. I'm kicking this guy square in the nuts. Full force." GM (OOC): "Remember, you have a 50 strength. That's roughly 25 tons of force right in the mommy-daddy button." Panther (OOC): "That's kinda the point." GM: "Okay, roll." Panther: :rolls: "Okay... is a 4 good?" (Panther's character has never played Champions before. Tonight was literally her first session) Rest of the table: :Gasps, males cringe, the other girl at the table grins wickedly: Buntai-Kun (OOC): "You nearly crit. That's very good." GM (OOC): :still cringing a bit: "Right in the 13s... Okay, roll damage." :rolls are made, damage is calculated: "Okay... 33 Stun after armor... and the 13s are a..." :looks at combat record sheet: "Egads! Times 4 STUN multiplier..." :looks at Joshua's player, or resident human calculator: "How much is 33 times 4?" Joshua (OOC): "Lots... roughly in the neighborhood of 130." GM: "Yeah. He's out of the fight. VERY out of the fight. You line up the kick, punt him right in the crotch, literally knock his dangly bits up into his throat, and..." Tzalan (interrupting, OOC): "What's the penalty for walking around with your foot literally wedged into another human being?" GM: "Ahem. The sheer force of it launches him a block and a half down the street. At the end of the next segment, he stops sliding, and enjoys his GM's Discretion." Panther (grinning fiercely): "I LIKE THIS GAME!" The crunch that was FELT around the world. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lemming Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Just to point out, the stun mod of 4, that's for killing attacks instead of rolling a stun mod. Otherwise, carry on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egyptoid Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 again with the Ninjas Seeker: Don't tell me, you're ZZ Triad, and you're ZZ Tong's little brother... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teh bunneh Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Y'all need to post something irresistible - I'm trying to get up the gumption to volunteer to join you' date=' and make the regular hour and a half drive up from Brighton to play![/quote'] 1.5 hours? I'd've thought Brighton would only be about 45 minutes or so away. Are you going to be at Genghis Con this weekend? Swing on by and introduce yourself if you are. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jwpacker Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... 1.5 hours? I'd've thought Brighton would only be about 45 minutes or so away. Are you going to be at Genghis Con this weekend? Swing on by and introduce yourself if you are. Unfortunately no. Something about Valentine's Day is conspiring against me attending. Where exactly do you guys meet when you get together? I'm a little south of Brighton, m'self, but were the drive shorter than I'd been thinking, might be convinced to make the trek northward from time to time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teh bunneh Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Unfortunately no. Something about Valentine's Day is conspiring against me attending. Where exactly do you guys meet when you get together? I'm a little south of Brighton, m'self, but were the drive shorter than I'd been thinking, might be convinced to make the trek northward from time to time. We're in Loveland. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Houston GM Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Quotes from Owlcon - part 1 D&D 4th Ed: Wraith Recon The group is essentially a high fantasy special forces team for the country of Dardalek. Cast of characters: Alek: human cleric Jelenneth: eldarin wizard Phelaia: tiefling warlock Torinn: dragonborn paladin Wendan: gnome rogue The team has been ordered to rescue Lt. Darl who has been captured by forces the hostile neighboring country. Jelenneth: "He's in his mid 30s and he's still a lieutenant? Clearly not the best and brightest of the Dardalek army." The team is tracking the raiders. The tracks indicate that they're dragging a box. Phelaia: "You'll know Lt. Darl by the box he's in." Jelenneth dispels a huge fire elemental. Torinn: "That's why we bring the wizard along ... to vaporize things." Lt. Darl is dead (due to Torinn's overly aggressive AEs). It turns out that the box actually contains stolen military documents, which we are also supposed to recover. Phelaia: "I told you that the box would be attached to the dragon." Alek: "Now we just need sneak up and break that heavy chain around its neck." Wendan: "I could run up to the dragon, jump up and down, and try to grab the box." Torinn plots his next attack... Torinn (ooc): I'm going to do something fun. Jelenneth (ooc): Uh oh. Phelaia (ooc): The last time he did something fun, he killed a plot point. Is he going to kill us this time? __________________ World of Darkness: "The Infected" A group of private investigators tries to figure out the cause behind a series of murder-suicides. Cast of characters: Marisa Velasco: vampire with psychic powers Monk: eastern-type monk who barely speaks English Norman Welling: inquisitor for the Vatican Vic Nation: rich hacker/tech guy Marisa fills the team in on the information she learned from her detective contact. Marisa: "Hopefully this is nothing 'interesting'." Norman: (sarcastically) "Oh yes. It's been completely normal so far." Norman goes to the workplace of John McCutchen, one of the murderers. He speaks with the supervisor under the pretense of being the priest performing the eulogy. "Father" Norman: "Did Mr. McCutchen go to church regularly?" Supervisor: (confused) "I ... I'm not sure..." "Father" Norman: "Was Mr. McCutchen a catholic?" (Apparently the player had PhysLim: unable to lie convincingly.) Vic is trapped in the team's offices. The building is surrounded by 10 men in full body armor. The men tried to talk him down ... until Vic started shooting at them. Then they started firing tear gas grenades into the offices. Vic: (yelling) "They're not taking me alive." Monk (ooc): I bet he's right. Norman and Monk have interrupted a murder-suicide (between the murder and the suicide). After restraining the murderer, and stabilizing the murderer, Norman calls 911. 911: "What is the nature of your emergency?" Norman: "We have a man who chopped both ..." 911: "Could you hold please." One minute passes. 911: "What is the nature of your emergency? Do you need police or an ambulance?" Norman: "We need it all. Police, ambulance and fire department. There's been a murder. The murderer chopped both his legs off. And he soaked himself in gasoline." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bubba smith Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Re: again with the Ninjas Seeker: Don't tell me' date=' you're ZZ Triad, and you're ZZ Tong's little brother...[/quote'] that tops it i'd say Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Heckus Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Situation: "Heroes" capture Blowtorch as the remaining villains escape. They take him back to their base, presumably to question him. Hero 1 to Hero 2: Hey look what I just learned to do. Hero 1 proceeds to assault a bound Blowtorch with his new power. Blowtorch: THAT'S ENOUGH!! I'LL TALK!! Hero 1: We can ask him questions??? crap, gotta think of one... Blowtorch: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
matrix3 Posted February 9, 2009 Report Share Posted February 9, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Situation: "Heroes" capture Blowtorch as the remaining villains escape. They take him back to their base, presumably to question him. Hero 1 to Hero 2: Hey look what I just learned to do. Hero 1 proceeds to assault a bound Blowtorch with his new power. Blowtorch: THAT'S ENOUGH!! I'LL TALK!! Hero 1: We can ask him questions??? crap, gotta think of one... Blowtorch: What was his new power? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Major Tom Posted February 10, 2009 Report Share Posted February 10, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... What was his new power? I think that Hero #1 just came up with a new twist on a staple of horror hentai... Major Tom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Houston GM Posted February 11, 2009 Report Share Posted February 11, 2009 Re: Quotes from Owlcon - part 2 Werewolf: The Apocolypse - "Reconnected" The Umbra has been disconnected from southeast Texas, and Kinfolk have been disappearing. This mixed-tribe pack of pups has been told to investigate. Cast of characters: Barry Tyler: Homid, Bone Gnawer, Philodox Billy: Homid, Uktena, Ragabash Georgia Connors: Homid, Glass Walker, Theurge Longtooth: Lupus, Silent Strider, Ahroun Mickey: Homid, Fianna, Ragabash Uni: Metis, Child of Gaia, Ahroun Georgia visited the next-door neighbor of one of the missing Kinfolk. Redneck: (yelling from inside the trailer) "Who are you?" Georgia: "Georgia Connors." Redneck: "I don't know you." Georgia: "That's right." Redneck: "Why are you on my porch?" Georgia: "Because my arms aren't long enough to reach your door from further back." The pack discovered the prison the Kinfolk are being held in. Uni (ooc): My wyrm sense is tingling. GM: It's getting pungent. Longtooth (ooc): That's just my socks. The pack scouted around the prison. The razor wire looked very shiny. Barry: "I can't believe that they'd have silver razor wire around this place. It's too expensive." Georgia: "They have turrets with 30mm cannons surrounding this place. They're not showing budgetary restraint." Longtooth "volunteered" Billy to cut the power to the prison. Billy: "Why am I getting volunteered to chop through live power lines?" Longtooth: "You're a sensation junkie." Billy: "Electrocution counts?" An observation. Georgia: (to Longtooth) "You're the most talkative Silent Strider I've ever met." The pack was attacked by a huge Black Spiral Dancer. Mickey (ooc): (describing his next action) I'm going to rip him from the rooter to the tooter. The pack located the focus of the ritual that disconnected the Umbra. Billy decided to carry it out of the prison. Barry: "Great. The Uktena is carrying around thermonuclear evil." The pack is trying to escort a dozen Kinfolk out of the prison. The Kinfolk are drugged, dazed and confused. Longtooth: "We'll just put them in golf carts and let them go." Georgia: "We can barely keep them walking in the right direction." Longtooth: "I know, but it would be funny to watch." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted February 12, 2009 Report Share Posted February 12, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Starting a 1920s Cthulhu campaign, and running the players through a rather detailed background questionnaire (after all, it helps to know how many NPC relatives I'll have available as victims/plot hooks) This includes religious leanings. I list some of the options. "Catholic? Protestant? Lutheran/Methodist/Episcopal/Unitarian/ etc etc etc etc" Player, blinking : "Gee, who'da thought there were so many sects of Christianity? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DJ Blackrock Posted February 13, 2009 Report Share Posted February 13, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Hunter: The Vigil tonight: Genevieve (OOC): :to a player who hadn't made it last session: "Okay, so there were posessions, fighting," :points at me: "and I emasculated him." Glitch (Me, OOC): "Emasculated?! You stabbed me twice in the chest!" Genevieve (OOC): "I only stabbed you a little." ----------------------- Scott (OOC): :to me: "Okay, okay, no more 'I told you so' dance." ----------------------- Doesn't need explanation: Me (totally in character): "Hey, I just got out of prison, you both look good to me." ----------------------- GM: "Glitch, what do you know about excorcism?" Glitch: "I know enough to get myself in trouble. I've seen a bunch of horror movies. Does that count for anything?" GM: :to our resident Occultist: "Yeah, he's no help. He thinks you need an old priest and a young priest and the power of christ to compel them." Glitch: "Hey!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Houston GM Posted February 13, 2009 Report Share Posted February 13, 2009 Quotes from Owlcon - part 3 Shadowrun 4th Ed.: "London Calling" The team is a rock band called "Promise of Pain" that used to moonlight as shadowrunners. Someone has stolen the tracks for the just-completed album, and the team using their skills to retrieve it. Cast of Characters: Toni Taunton: elf "faceman" (lead singer) Leo Masters: human physical adept (guitarist) Helmut Wolf: human shaman (base player) Rhodes Nicholson: elf hacker (keyboardist) Rocky Blades: human street samurai (drummer) Larry Orik: troll roady (bodyguard) The band is assaulted by a group of skinheads in a bar. Toni: "I realize you boys may be too dumb to count, but there's four of you and six of us." The fight goes poorly for the skinheads. Larry: (surprised) "They haven't pulled guns yet." Rocky: "It's a friendly bar fight." The thieves turn out to be elven ladies who are mages and members of the British aristocracy. One thief delivered the band's music to the country home of another thief (Lady Victoria Gordon-Windsor). The team tries to fast talk their way in. Toni: (in a cockney accent) "We're 'ere to pick up th' files." Gate Guard: "What files?" Toni: "Th' files that Lady Jane Kirkwood dropped off 'ere this mornin'. We're 'ere t' pick 'em up." Gate Guard: "Oh! That's wot she was droppin' off. Well, I'm goin' t' 'ave t' call Lady Victoria t' make sure y' 'ave approval." Toni: "She did'n' call y' already? Well, y' kin go 'ead an disturb 'er 'gain if'n y' wan'. I'm not th' one she'll be 'ollerin' at." Gate Guard: "I guess it's okay t' let y' go in. If'n y' kin make it by Nigel, then y' mus' be okay." The band drives up to the mansion. Nigel turns out to be a huge, three-headed dog sleeping in front of the front door. Toni: "Let's try the servants' entrance instead." Promise of Pain's tracks are the mansion's music studio ... along with some other music. Apparently Lady Jane Kirkwood fancied herself to be a rock star ... but she had all the musical talent of Paris Hilton. Helmut: "Let's get a copy of that. We can use it to embarrass her." Rhodes: "We can mix it up and give her a future career on YouTube." We think the thieves may be attending the Promise of Pain's party in the evening, so Helmut calls Simon, the manager. Helmut: (on the phone with Simon) "Can you send us the guest list for this evening?" Simon: "I'll send it to Rhodes." Helmut: "Like I can't read a file?!?" Helmut: (to Rhodes) "Simon is sending you the guest list." Rhodes: "Like you can't read a file?!? Oh right. You can't." The thieves (led by Lady Veronica Gordon-Windsor) have started attacking Promise of Pain and partygoers. The band members are responding with lethal force. Toni: "Veronica, b****, did you think our name is just a stage name?" Helmut: "We're called 'Promise of Pain' for a reason." After kidnapping and murdering a megacorporate executive, and performing blood magic in front of witnesses and cameras, four of the five thieves are dead. The fifth (Lady Jane Kirkwood) has been wounded and captured. Leo: (to Lady Jane) "What on earth were you trying to accomplish?" Lady Jane: (semi-coherently) "We were looking for attention." Helmut: "Congratulations. You succeeded beyond your wildest expectations." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadowsoul Posted February 13, 2009 Report Share Posted February 13, 2009 Re: Quotes from Owlcon - part 3 Toni: (in a cockney accent) "We're 'ere to pick up th' files." Gate Guard: "What files?" Toni: "Th' files that Lady Jane Kirkwood dropped off 'ere this mornin'. We're 'ere t' pick 'em up." Gate Guard: "Oh! That's wot she was droppin' off. Well, I'm goin' t' 'ave t' call Lady Victoria t' make sure y' 'ave approval." Toni: "She did'n' call y' already? Well, y' kin go 'ead an disturb 'er 'gain if'n y' wan'. I'm not th' one she'll be 'ollerin' at." Gate Guard: "I guess it's okay t' let y' go in. If'n y' kin make it by Nigel, then y' mus' be okay." Had the cockney Toni was imitating spent some time in the West Country? He seems to have picked up some rural speech patterns. (And the entire conversation went by without anyone calling anyone else 'you slag' which makes it highly unrealistic). I did like the quote about 'Promise of Pain' being more than just a stage name though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted February 14, 2009 Report Share Posted February 14, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... For a very long time I thought "Toxic Shamans" was a band name. I still think it makes a great band name. Lucius Alexander The palindromedary points out that in the one edition of Shadowrun we have around here somewhere, the only time the phrase is used, that seems a reasonable inference. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drhoz Posted February 14, 2009 Report Share Posted February 14, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Ran the first session of the Cthulhu game last night. It being Valentines, I picked a nice romantic story to spin them. Kevin Hassall's "A Happy Family" from Adventures in Arkham Country. Because I'm an evil, evil swine. If you've ever read or played that one, you WILL remember it. It helped that I have some physical resemblance to the bad guy, which was really creeping the players out as I unconsciously matched all the mannerisms i described. Purrdence's back-up character "My long lost evil twin? That I never knew about? She has a goatee" Alexei Petrovich : (trying to remember other PC's name) Melbourne? Brisbane? GM : It's not Adelaide either Per "Hammer" Dragovic : Sydney Alexei : Ah yes, the other place. Sydney Delthorne OOC : I'm going to get that a lot, aren't I? Alexei's English occasionally occasionally gives him trouble Hammer : He died intestate GM : (quipping) So is his executor - interstate, that is. Alexei : *puzzled* He had no balls? Hammer : Intestate - it means he had no heirs. Alexei : He was bald? GM : *musing* I suppose if he had no balls, he wouldn't have any heirs either. Makes sense. GM : (smiling sweetly) So... you're going outside. Alone. Defenceless. Into the dark. Sydney's player: ( expression of horror dawning ) I'm playing Call of Cthulhu and I went out alone??? Hammer's player: ( head in hands ) I've played Call of Cthulhu and I sent him out alone! And as the mortally wounded horror plunges into the gorge... Alexei : ****, there goes the evidence. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted February 15, 2009 Report Share Posted February 15, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Hundreds of pages of stuff, and me just starting... OK, from a few years back. I was playing "Stick", a blind martial artist with super-senses (rip off of Daredevil, yes.). We found ourselves in battle in a underwater base that was in the process of flooding. Defeating several agents, I reached the control panel, and asked the super-scientist in power armor what to do. "Push the red button!" "Which button?" "The red one!" "But..." "Quick! Push the RED BUTTON!" "Dude, I'm blind. Which button?" "Err... the third one from the right." "Thank you!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vulcan Posted February 15, 2009 Report Share Posted February 15, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ian Mackinder Posted February 15, 2009 Report Share Posted February 15, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... I'm guessing Stick doesn't get to be the group's "designated driver" very often. Pity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Korvar Posted February 15, 2009 Report Share Posted February 15, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... I'm guessing Stick doesn't get to be the group's "designated driver" very often. Pity. I dunno - seen "Blind Fury"? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow Hawk Posted February 15, 2009 Report Share Posted February 15, 2009 Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group... Stick had his problems, yes. His passive sonar couldn't see through a closed window, he couldn't read a dial instrument, he couldn't see a flashing red light, which made flying the team jet a little harrowing... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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