I'm realizing that cremation may be my only chance to have a smokin' hot bod.

2 hours ago, Logan D. Hurricanes said:

 

On the plus side, he'll be able to carve his girlfriend's and his name into his cell wall.

Moron.

On 6/26/2023 at 11:34 AM, Pariah said:

Only one has to go?  Not all?  

19 hours ago, Logan D. Hurricanes said:

I've seen signs in our neighborhood with wording like "Please Slow Down!  Precious Children Live Here!"  I've commented before that I've wondered whether there are signs that read "Go Ahead and Speed - We Don't Like These Kids".

59 minutes ago, wcw43921 said:

I heard a story of a woman who did this regularly, and then one day her son asked whether they should throw out the cereal -- because the box's expiration date was over a year old.  

BTW, this pic would be way funnier if he was pouring in some other generic cereal, like a Frosted Flakes derivative, into the Froot Loops box.

4 hours ago, Logan D. Hurricanes said:

Hard to believe Tennessee is so low in education. 

 

3 hours ago, Old Man said:

I like how there’s three different spellings, like “one of these must be right”. 

I'm just surprised they spelled "Only" correctly.

Will Hero Games have any presence at GenCon 2023?  I want to stop by, say hi and thanks to anybody from the company.

16 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said:

Q: What did you do to be sent on a one-way excursion to Mars with nothing by snarky robots for company?

Watched a bunch of bad movies with those same robots and made a bunch of snarky comments throughout.  While on the Satellite of Love.

NT:  What's the first wacky thing you do once you get to Mars?

6 hours ago, Pariah said:

Translating the collected works of Isaac Asimov into Tolkien's Elvish, and the complete works of JRR Tolkien into Klingon.

Now, why would I do that again?

6 hours ago, Asperion said:

NT:  Crazy antics that you perform on your travel to Pluto. 

Convert my spacesuit to make me look like Mickey Mouse.

23 minutes ago, Lord Liaden said:

 

Yeah, Michael Jackson joke... but only Trump's most gullible brainwashed cultists would fall for his grift at this point.

So... only about 40% of the electorate, then?

12 hours ago, Pariah said:

Life is pain, Logan. Anyone who says differently is selling something.

As you wish.

8 hours ago, Pariah said:

I saw a thing on the Book of Face soliciting answers to "My first concert was _______."

 

So I replied, "Sixth grade band. We were awful."

A former coworker and her husband once went to their kids' concert, and after they played, my coworker noticed her husband wasn't clapping.  She asked him why, and he replied, "Because they sucked!"

1 hour ago, Duke Bushido said:

 

Same.

 

It's like pizza: the older I get, the less I like it.  It doesn't really help that the "bacon craze" about ten years back has made it almost impossible to find bacon-flavored bacon, at least around these parts.  Everyone has to tout some special magical flavor (apple wood smoked!  Pecan and chicory!  Thin-sliced weasel anus!), leaving pretty much all of them tasting not unlike a grade-school chemistry set.

 

 

Thin-sliced weasel anus?  I'm afraid I don't share your culinary expertise.

9 hours ago, Old Man said:

 

Subtle.  But funny!

 

Although Janeway and Chakotay have their books switched.

I can't read the titles for Janeway's and B'Elanna's books.

37 minutes ago, Hermit said:

It's like war crime bingo with Putin and his thugs.

Only they're going for the whole card, not just five in a row.

On 6/4/2023 at 11:38 AM, Logan D. Hurricanes said:

So... before my wife and I had any kids, I told her that I wanted to name our first-born son after my father and her father, as that was how I was named (after my two grandfathers).  Thus, if we had a son, his first and middle names would be William James.  

Fast forward a few years... we have two kids, both girls.  I'm happy to have them, not disappointed at all at not having a son.  But the story of our "son's" name does get told to the girls at some point.

Fast forward many more years, and my now-adult daughters tell me that back in middle school and high school they had an imaginary big brother, of course named William James.  They even told their friends and classmates about him - how my wife and I were somehow upset that he joined the military (which also explained his absence from our home), and that we didn't have any pictures on display of him because we were so worried about him and didn't want constant reminders.

Whoever came up with this:

21 hours ago, Cancer said:

NT:  Over-the-top things Cancer might do during the Very Last Lecture Of His Career.  NB: The main subject of the lecture will be searching for extraterrestrial life, intelligent and otherwise.

During the lecture, have a message from extraterrestrials come in, saying, "Stop trying to contact us, already!  We checked you out, and there's NO WAY we're getting involved in that $&!%!  You humans are cray-cray-crazy!"

NT:  Unexpected reasons why the extraterrestrials haven't contacted us yet.

17 hours ago, Cygnia said:

*sobs*

Georgia GOP Chair Goes Full Flat-Earth, Says Globes Are Part of a Conspiracy

Would she say that it's a... global conspiracy?

1 hour ago, Old Man said:

"Make America Florida".  

Because "Make America Stupid" was already effectively taken?

1 hour ago, Lord Liaden said:

Given the mentality I hear from some of them, I'm not sure they've even thought

I'm pretty sure you could have stopped the sentence right there.

12 hours ago, Logan D. Hurricanes said:

I hate to say this. Tonight... too much cheese. 

Oh, you're going to watch Trancers tonight?

On 5/13/2023 at 10:09 PM, BoloOfEarth said:

Watched the pilot episode of My Secret Identity yesterday.  Starred Jerry O'Connell and Derek McGrath, with the young Andrew Clements (O'Connell) getting superpowers from a "photon beam" in his neighbor Dr. Jeffcoate's (McGrath) in-home lab.  Super speed, invulnerability, and the ability to float (not really fly - he used aerosol spray cans to allow him to move).  Admittedly a bit cheesy, but I enjoyed it.

Soooo... I ended up buying a set of DVDs online for the whole series (3 seasons) and it arrived yesterday.  (On a side note, given the fairly low price, only about $30 IIRC, I shouldn't have been surprised that it's all homemade, just episodes recorded off the TV and burned onto DVDs numbered 1-6 with a green magic marker.)  I watched the first 8 or so episodes yesterday.  Still cheesy but still fun.  

My first Champions game was the VIPER Nest / Microfilm Madness one.  The GM had a villain attack the VIPER traitor who was coming to meet with UNTIL, to which one hero responds.  And then another villain attacked that hero, which a new hero saw and responded to.  Lather, rinse, repeat until all the villains and all the heroes had been introduced.  It was a lot of fun and gave us a fairly organic intro to each other's powers and personalities.  (Of course, that does require each hero actually respond to the new villain's attack and not be like "I'll just wait to see what happens next.")