Jump to content

Quote of the Week from my gaming group...


Darren Watts

Recommended Posts

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

One of the first lessons if the enemy has Area of Effect Weapons: Don't stand to close together. Formations are nice against other armies, but a bad choice against magic users and other artillery weapons.

 

When the enemy knows of the Heroes caster (especially when he can throw fireballs), they would certainly not lump together that much. And there is always the concept of a vanguard just so the heroes trigger any fight enders...

 

 

Vitus. A category of it's own :)

 

 

Agreed, but is it a category 6 or 7?

 

 

 

Major Tom 2009 :eg:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Oh category 9 at least.... :)

 

More quotes from the funny farm I game with...

 

(Note: These have been piling up for a while...there may be a few more than usual)

--------------------------------------

 

EMBRIA GAME (see my sig for character pics)

 

Rhiannon - Fighter/Rogue in Full Plate, and Queen of the Elves (now)

 

Idril Losselhelen - Rhi's main advisor, court wizard, and senechal (I think its the senechal...might be the castillan...or the major-dodo...)

 

Melissandra - The wizard formerly known as Metreon (there was this magic belt, you see...)

 

Varga - Barbarian Babe with magenta hair, and general force of nature

 

Chyra - Adorable filthy-cute teen necromancer

 

Leigh - Priest of Pelor the Sun God

 

Helda - Varga's little sister and team rogue

 

-------------------

 

Idril (OOC): I cant cast that. Its from one of my barred schools.

 

Rhiannon (OOC): *Excitedly* YOURE A BARD?!? :D

 

Idril: *Dignified Wizardly facepalm*

 

---------------------

 

As we explore a posh merchant's guild's headquarters (and apparent pleasure palace), Melissandra keeps seeing things she wants for the Black Tower she inherited from her mentor Aganathzar the Unnecessarily Grumpy (as we know him).

 

Rhiannon: *Fights a massive animated ivory statue of an elephant that was in their foyer*

 

Water Elemental: *Rises up out of the fountain pool when Rhi gets too close*

 

Rhiannon: Whoops! Bonus critter! Water elemental!

 

Melissandra: *wistfully* I so have to get one of those!

 

Varga: SHOP LATER! > : (

 

Rhiannon: Melissandra is just experiencing a case of Palace Envy

 

Melissandra: My palace flies! My palace flies!

 

Varga: *Decides whether to clobber the elemental, the elephant statue...or Melissandra*

 

----------------------

 

Best Hypothetical Album Title of the Week: "Evil Beyond the Door", by Summonable Balrog

 

------------------

 

Indie Album runner-up: "Tiger Head and the One Eyed Elephant"

 

-----------------

 

Melissondra (OOC): So I turn to him and say-

 

Simba the Loud Cat: MEOW!

 

All : O_O

 

(No seriously, it was ear-splitting)

 

---------------

 

GM: *Describes the inhabitants of a room, including a creepy, skeletal figure with writhing luminescent purple squirmy worn-things for guts*

 

Rhiannon (OOC): Ah, la Morgh....*

 

(*If this isnt funny to you, consult a Pathfinder Bestiary. If it still isnt funny after that, learn a few French phrases. If it still isnt funny.... Im so very sorry, but we do try...)

 

----------------------

 

Metreon (OOC): Its OK. Im just me.

 

Rhiannon (OOC): I think one of those statements nullifies the other. ;)

 

Metreon (OOC): ...Yeah, probably.

 

----------------------

 

Album Title of that Week: "The Vampire Waits for No One", by Chamber of Seacrest

 

-----------------------

 

Helda (OOC): Im TENTH LEVEL now! Give me some f***ing credit!

 

Metreon (OOC): Youre a rogue! Steal it! ;P

 

--------------------

 

Rhiannon: *Looks over the sea of shambling, rotting figures* Well....they certainly look..."zombesque"

 

---------------------

 

Surcoat the group will not allow Rhiannon to wear: "Bahamut for the Win, B**ches!"

 

--------------------

 

Chyra (OOC): Chyra does not know the meaning of the word "underwear"

 

---------------------

 

Rhiannon: *Kicks open the entryway of the Nightfang Spire*

 

Metreon: *Looking inside* Girallons....f**k this guy for bringing Girallons....

 

------------------------

 

GM: ...And one of the Girallons is larger than the others, and wearing a leather mask...

 

Rhiannon (OOC): Look out! Its Girallon Grodd! :D

 

Metreon (OOC): If it WAS Girallon Grodd, hed put the mask on another 4-armed ape...

 

----------------------

 

Metreon (OOC): Its a non-dismissable spell. Its there! Its proud! Its...not...really going anywhere...That doesnt really rhyme, but you know what I mean

 

--------------------

 

Varga: *Looking at the room full of 4-armed apes* So..."Get em"?

 

Rhiannon: I guess so. I keep trying to be all clever and tactical, but things just wont let me!

 

--------------------

 

Rhiannon (OOC): I activate my Flaming Sword, using the command word-

 

Varga (OOC): "KA-BOB!" :D

 

--------------------

 

Rhiannon (OOC): Surfer Apes Must Die!

 

----------------------

 

Metreon (OOC): There are only two Alignments in the world; "In Our Way" and "Not"!

 

--------------------

 

GM: ...It looks similar to the undead thing you fought that was with the undead Dragon.

 

Rhiannon: He looks pretty fly, for a Wight guy. *Moves her figure on the map* (OOC) OK, Im moving to here... ;)

 

GM: OK, just let me draw in aaaaaaaall the little daggers flying from the GM towards Rhi...

 

Rhiannon: :o

 

------------------

 

Rhiannon: " "Mister Stitches"?!? You called THAT thing "Mister Stitches"?!

 

Chyra: What?! Its a cat!

 

Metreon: In the sense that it has a stupid name, yes. Otherwise......

 

-----------------

 

Chyra (OOC): Chyra looks up at Mean Mister Sun

 

GM: The Sun looks down on you....It doesnt like you

 

----------------

 

Metreon (OOC): Im just lazy....But if it looks like "Wisdom" to you, Ill take it

 

-----------------

 

Eydar: Allurielle? Yes, shes a nice girl from a good tower...

 

------------------

 

Metreon (OOC): What did I ever do to deserve this?

 

Varga (OOC): Do you want it alphabetically, or numerically? ;P

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Vitus. A category of it's own :)

 

If they wrote the Comics Code today, Vitus would have his own clause.

 

Section C: Impermissible Content

.

.

.

Category 9: Vitus

I - Neither Vitus, nor any character resembling or recognizably based on Vitus, shall appear in any comic book whatsoever.

II - We mean it.

III - If you won't do it for us, think of the children!

 

Lucius Alexander

 

This palindromedary tagline approved by the Comics Code Authority

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

If they wrote the Comics Code today, Vitus would have his own clause.

 

Section C: Impermissible Content

.

Category 9: Vitus

I - Neither Vitus, nor any character resembling or recognizably based on Vitus, shall appear in any comic book whatsoever.

II - We mean it.

III - If you won't do it for us, think of the children!

 

XD but dang, there goes the plans for Gnoll & Void, Issue 1. I wonder who would write and illustrate?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

One of the first lessons if the enemy has Area of Effect Weapons: Don't stand to close together. Formations are nice against other armies, but a bad choice against magic users and other artillery weapons.

 

When the enemy knows of the Heroes caster (especially when he can throw fireballs), they would certainly not lump together that much. And there is always the concept of a vanguard just so the heroes trigger any fight enders...

 

IIRC, there was a logic for why they were clumped like that: either they were indoors, or the army being spread too thin would have made it too easy for the PCs to "make a hole" and charge through. Either way, I think the real problem was that the DM either forgot the wizard had the Sudden Maximize Feat and/or was expecting the player to save it for the BBEG.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

GM: ...And one of the Girallons is larger than the others, and wearing a leather mask...

 

Rhiannon (OOC): Look out! Its Girallon Grodd! :D

 

Metreon (OOC): If it WAS Girallon Grodd, hed put the mask on another 4-armed ape...

 

 

Actually... that would be Girallon Grond. Gorilla Grodd was just an average telepathic, telekinetic, super--gorilla with only two arms. ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Drawn and quartered by him...

 

 

I see this post and I immediately visualize Vitus doing an impersonation

of Fred Flintstone; specifically, the part where -- in the episode where Fred

and Barney spent the night in the mansion that had been left to Fred by

his [supposedly] deceased uncle, all while being chased by the uncle's

servants, only to find out in the morning that the uncle was not only alive,

but that the whole thing had been a huge practical joke -- Fred breaks

out this gigantic switchcleaver and starts chasing the uncle and his servants,

laughing like a maniacal fiend the entire time.

 

 

Major Tom 2009 :eg:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

I see this post and I immediately visualize Vitus doing an impersonation

of Fred Flintstone; specifically, the part where -- in the episode where Fred

and Barney spent the night in the mansion that had been left to Fred by

his [supposedly] deceased uncle, all while being chased by the uncle's

servants, only to find out in the morning that the uncle was not only alive,

but that the whole thing had been a huge practical joke -- Fred breaks

out this gigantic switchcleaver and starts chasing the uncle and his servants,

laughing like a maniacal fiend the entire time.

 

Yup, I can see that. Vitus doesn't have much - ok, any - patience for practical jokers.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Yup' date=' I can see that. Vitus doesn't have much - ok, any - patience for practical jokers.[/quote']

 

 

I rather expect that he'd take the time to come up with a new spell to deal

with any such miscreant -- say, something along the lines of "Implode

Scrotum", perhaps.

 

 

Major Tom 2009 :sneaky:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Re: Quote of the Week from my gaming group...

 

Andraste the Pyromaniac, Eladrin Warlock

Theren the Archer, Elven Ranger

Adinymus the Holy, Drow Cleric

Erevan the Dancer, Eladrin Swordmage

Nebin the Short, Halfling Rogue

Sepheris the Creepy, Shadow-Elf Thief

Goguin the Faithful, Dwarven Cleric

 

The GM breaks out the map...

Andraste: The more elaborate the scene, the more nervous Therin gets.

 

The King defends himself...

Therin: He just burned him alive!

Andraste: My kind of king.

 

Sepheris gets flanked...

"I really need to watch where I'm going."

 

Out of context...

Eravan: Sleep is amazing.

 

We encounter some Drow elves...

Therin: The Drow look unfriendly.

Andraste: Do they ever not look unfriendly?

Adinymus: No.

 

Our first attack fail, so we try to leave...

Erevan: Sorry, we thought you were someone else.

Andraste: Someone we could hurt.

 

After defeating the Drow, we loot the bodies...

Andraste: They have no magic items, so I'm going to mutilate the bodies.

Adinymus: They do have some money on them.

Andraste: Then I won't totally mutilate them.

 

Sepheris checks for traps...

"I open the door and hope nothing explodes."

 

Andraste: Zombies!

Adinymus: Zombie Werewolves!

Sepheris: Zombie Werewolf Vampires!

Eravan: Zombie Werewolf Vampire Skeletons!

Therin: From Hell!

 

A ghoul attacks Adinymus...

"Bad touch! Bad touch!"

 

GM sings...

"I enjoy being a ghoul..."

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Unfortunately, your content contains terms that we do not allow. Please edit your content to remove the highlighted words below.
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...