Cancer Posted May 8, 2019 Report Share Posted May 8, 2019 3 hours ago, Lucius said: A: It's like the behavior of herd animals Q: Have you read Autonomous Responses of Odoriferous Plants to Potential Browsers? It's about plants reacting to animals smelling them. A: No, not web browsers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted May 9, 2019 Report Share Posted May 9, 2019 10 hours ago, Cancer said: A: No, not web browsers. Q: Is this software store selling something that only a spider would actually pay for? A: He has returned his ticket to Heaven. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clnicholsusa Posted May 10, 2019 Report Share Posted May 10, 2019 On 5/8/2019 at 7:46 AM, Lucius said: A: He has returned his ticket to heaven. Q: MICHAEL LANDON DID WHAT? A: Criss Angel, David Blaine, and Steven Frayne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted May 10, 2019 Report Share Posted May 10, 2019 1 hour ago, clnicholsusa said: A: Criss Angel, David Blaine, and Steven Frayne Q: Name three people whose offer to play baccarat with you should be respectfully declined. A: You told me this is a brilliant idea. It is not. This is an awful idea! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted May 15, 2019 Report Share Posted May 15, 2019 Q: Whatever made you think selling heaters in hell was a great concept? A: Better be careful with all that clean energy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted May 19, 2019 Report Share Posted May 19, 2019 On 5/14/2019 at 9:38 PM, Asperion said: A: Better be careful with all that clean energy. Q: Tony, is the Arc reactor supposed to be emitting a purple glow? A: Of course it's radioactive. It's meant to be radioactive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted May 21, 2019 Report Share Posted May 21, 2019 On 5/18/2019 at 7:23 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: A: Of course it's radioactive. It's meant to be radioactive. Q: Madame Curie, are you quite sure it is safe to work with that stuff? A: Just don't try making wine out of it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted May 21, 2019 Report Share Posted May 21, 2019 4 hours ago, Cancer said: Q: Madame Curie, are you quite sure it is safe to work with that stuff? A: Just don't try making wine out of it. Q: What will we do with that urine sample? A: He only did that for the adrenaline rush. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted May 21, 2019 Report Share Posted May 21, 2019 10 hours ago, tkdguy said: A: He only did that for the adrenaline rush. Q: Did Deadpool really jump out of a starship into the heart of a black hole? A: There's a difference between brave and clinically insane. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted May 21, 2019 Report Share Posted May 21, 2019 1 hour ago, Pariah said: A: There's a difference between brave and clinically insane. Q: How do you determine which one of these guys is Batman and which one is the Joker? A: Hey! Don't take ALL the indigestible plastic waste! Leave some for the rest of us, you sloppy pig! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted May 23, 2019 Report Share Posted May 23, 2019 Q: What is Porky Pig eating over in that corner? A: He was killed by paper. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted May 23, 2019 Report Share Posted May 23, 2019 16 minutes ago, Asperion said: A: He was killed by paper. Q: We haven't heard from The Rock lately. What's going on? A: He believes he is the most intelligent being in the Universe. He is mistaken. tkdguy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted May 25, 2019 Report Share Posted May 25, 2019 On 5/22/2019 at 7:42 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: We haven't heard from The Rock lately. What's going on? A: He believes he is the most intelligent being in the Universe. He is mistaken. Q: What's the problem with your new coworker? A: He reminds me of someone, who reminds me of someone else, who looks altogether different. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted May 25, 2019 Report Share Posted May 25, 2019 9 hours ago, tkdguy said: A: He reminds me of someone, who reminds me of someone else, who looks altogether different. Q: What's with that guy who looks a little like, and yet entirely unlike, Erwin Schrödinger? A: For the last time, we did not order a giant trampoline! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucius Posted May 25, 2019 Report Share Posted May 25, 2019 42 minutes ago, Pariah said: Q: What's with that guy who looks a little like, and yet entirely unlike, Erwin Schrödinger? A: For the last time, we did not order a giant trampoline! Q: I can't leave until someone signs the receipt for this giant trampoline, so will you sign it now or do I just stand around until you do? A: So THAT'S why we got a giant trampoline! Lucius Alexander The palindromedary is already jumping on it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted May 25, 2019 Report Share Posted May 25, 2019 3 minutes ago, Lucius said: A: So THAT'S why we got a giant trampoline! Q: Danny's coming over to play "Bouncy Bouncy Brachiosaurus" and he brought his own dinosaur! Can we get the giant trampoline ready so we can start right away? A: I really wish you had told me that wasn't a euphemism -- I got my hopes up for nothing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Asperion Posted May 28, 2019 Report Share Posted May 28, 2019 On 5/25/2019 at 12:03 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: Danny's coming over to play "Bouncy Bouncy Brachiosaurus" and he brought his own dinosaur! Can we get the giant trampoline ready so we can start right away? A: I really wish you had told me that wasn't a euphemism -- I got my hopes up for nothing. Q: When you were talking about banking, did you mean in more abstract terms? A: That was an honest dishonest thief. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted May 31, 2019 Report Share Posted May 31, 2019 On 5/28/2019 at 3:45 PM, Asperion said: A: That was an honest dishonest thief. Q: Oh look, he showed up just like he said he would in the challenge note! What do you think of that, Inspector? A: You ain't never had a friend like me, or any other kind of friend. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clnicholsusa Posted May 31, 2019 Report Share Posted May 31, 2019 14 hours ago, Michael Hopcroft said: A: You ain't never had a friend like me, or any other kind of friend. Q: Just what WERE you saying to the president? A: Trickle down is a bad idea because the bees follow anyway and you're sure to get stung. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted May 31, 2019 Report Share Posted May 31, 2019 1 hour ago, clnicholsusa said: A: Trickle down is a bad idea because the bees follow anyway and you're sure to get stung. Q: Check out this economic model based on Winnie the Pooh's experiences in the Hundred-Acre Wood! A: It's been an hour and a half. Of course your oatmeal is cold. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michael Hopcroft Posted June 1, 2019 Report Share Posted June 1, 2019 9 hours ago, Pariah said: A: It's been an hour and a half. Of course your oatmeal is cold. Q: I see Goldilocks came over again, so why do I have a full bowl? Is something wrong with this porridge? A: There's a reason Goldilocks keep returning, and the oatmeal isn't that fantastic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marcus Impudite Posted June 3, 2019 Report Share Posted June 3, 2019 On 5/31/2019 at 11:07 PM, Michael Hopcroft said: Q: I see Goldilocks came over again, so why do I have a full bowl? Is something wrong with this porridge? A: There's a reason Goldilocks keep returning, and the oatmeal isn't that fantastic. Q: What do you mean Papa Bear is having an affair? A: I told you she would never consciously betray the Rebellion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tkdguy Posted June 3, 2019 Report Share Posted June 3, 2019 1 hour ago, Marcus Impudite said: Q: What do you mean Papa Bear is having an affair? A: I told you she would never consciously betray the Rebellion. Q: What's this I hear about Leia talking in her sleep? A: It's not supposed to go in there! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted June 3, 2019 Report Share Posted June 3, 2019 1 hour ago, tkdguy said: A: It's not supposed to go in there! Q: Okay, I put the lime in the watermelon and mixed it all up. What now? A: Not an actual gummy bear, obviously. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
clnicholsusa Posted June 3, 2019 Report Share Posted June 3, 2019 21 minutes ago, Pariah said: A: Not an actual gummy bear, obviously. Q: I'd ask what flavor the big white ones are, but the last guy that tried to lick one got eaten? A: I still say the worst bear to meet in the wild is Gryllis. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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