Bazza Posted March 21, 2022 Report Share Posted March 21, 2022 Do librarians need math? Didn’t think so… Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 21, 2022 Report Share Posted March 21, 2022 There are 10 kinds of people in this world: Those who understand binary and those who don't ... and those who know that Base 3 is a thing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 21, 2022 Report Share Posted March 21, 2022 A young woman is seeing her boyfriend for the last time before leaving for a six month internship in Venice. She asks him, "Would you like me to bring home something for you?" "Yeah," he replies. "Can you bring me home an Italian girl?" "Excuse me?" "I've always thought that Italian girls were super hot," he continues. "So if you could bring one home with you, I think the three of us could have a lot of fun together." "Okay," she says, "if that's what you really want." So she leaves for Venice the next morning, and the months fly by. The internship is a rousing success. She returns home, and her boyfriend picks her up from the airport. As they're driving home, has asks her, "So, before you left, you asked if there was anything I wanted you to bring back with you...." "I remember," she says, nodding her head. "And...?" "Well, I tried my hardest to do exactly what you asked me to do," she said. "But it's going to be at least another month before I find out whether it's a girl." Tjack and Christougher 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted March 21, 2022 Report Share Posted March 21, 2022 Base 3 is definitely a thing, eg Morse Code is base 3. mattingly 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archer Posted March 21, 2022 Report Share Posted March 21, 2022 Spoiler Part one: Wolverine strolls into the lab and throws a very bloody cloth on the table. It lands with wet, meaty thump. Wolverine says, "It wasn't easy. But now you have what you need to build the gizmo which will save the world. Mister Fantastic looks at the cloth dubiously then lifts the edge to look underneath. With a visible wince, he lowers the cloth and says, "Perhaps I wasn't clear enough. When I said that my invention needs buckyballs, what I meant was...." Tjack 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archer Posted March 21, 2022 Report Share Posted March 21, 2022 Spoiler Part 2 Mister Fantastic's explanation stutters to a halt as Wolverine's claws snick into place. Wolverine in a voice both deep and deadly growls, "After all I went through...Make. It. Happen." Mister Fantastic gulps audibly. < 53 minutes later > A cascade of lights chase themselves up and down the sides of a futuristic device, illuminating the lab in a glowing swirl of colors. Mister Fantastic leans back in his chair saying, "Huh. I seriously didn't expect that to work...." Tjack 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tjack Posted March 21, 2022 Report Share Posted March 21, 2022 1 hour ago, archer said: Reveal hidden contents Part one: Wolverine strolls into the lab and throws a very bloody cloth on the table. It lands with wet, meaty thump. Wolverine says, "It wasn't easy. But now you have what you need to build the gizmo which will save the world. Mister Fantastic looks at the cloth dubiously then lifts the edge to look underneath. With a visible wince, he lowers the cloth and says, "Perhaps I wasn't clear enough. When I said that my invention needs buckyballs, what I meant was...." Not to mention what Mr. Barnes went through. archer 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
archer Posted March 21, 2022 Report Share Posted March 21, 2022 1 hour ago, Tjack said: Not to mention what Mr. Barnes went through. In the famous words of someone famous: "I regret I have but one life to give for my country...." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tjack Posted March 21, 2022 Report Share Posted March 21, 2022 33 minutes ago, archer said: In the famous words of someone famous: "I regret I have but one life to give for my country...." Yeah...but he gave BOTH of something. And I’d rather have given the life.😫 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 22, 2022 Report Share Posted March 22, 2022 Yo mama so dumb, she thinks the Fourier series is a show on Netflix. Tjack 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted March 23, 2022 Report Share Posted March 23, 2022 Everyone know the Fourier series ihas a holographic rating. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted March 23, 2022 Report Share Posted March 23, 2022 They say that Prudence, Faith, Charity, Hope, and Temperance, are virtues...except when they get together as Friday is 'Ladies Night'. Tjack 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted March 23, 2022 Report Share Posted March 23, 2022 You think gas prices are expensive, but have you seen Chimneys? They're through the roof. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tjack Posted March 23, 2022 Report Share Posted March 23, 2022 18 hours ago, Bazza said: They say that Prudence, Faith, Charity, Hope, and Temperance, are virtues...except when they get together as Friday is 'Ladies Night'. That’s strange, because if you add Crystal and Champagne you get the list of dancers at the local “Gentlemen’s Club”. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cancer Posted March 23, 2022 Report Share Posted March 23, 2022 Don't forget Destiny. There's always a Destiny, according to Joe Bob Briggs. Tjack 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tjack Posted March 23, 2022 Report Share Posted March 23, 2022 16 minutes ago, Cancer said: Don't forget Destiny. There's always a Destiny, according to Joe Bob Briggs. Right now she’s busy on the main stage. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 26, 2022 Report Share Posted March 26, 2022 Him: "If I had a choice, I hope I die making love." Her: "Well, at least we'll know it was a quick death." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 26, 2022 Report Share Posted March 26, 2022 I once fell in love with a girl who only knew four of the English vowels. It was destined to fail, though. She never even knew I existed. Logan D. Hurricanes and tkdguy 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ockham's Spoon Posted March 26, 2022 Report Share Posted March 26, 2022 I was explaining to my wife about an article from Bloomberg written by an out-of-touch economist on the topic of inflation and how to avoid its bite. The initial contention was that inflation really only affected people who made below $300k a year, which sort of sounded like the best way to not be affected by inflation was to not be poor. That inauspicious start was then followed up with suggestions like use more public transportation, eat lentils instead of meat, and (I kid you not) let your pets die. Yes, you can tighten up your budget by euthanizing your pets instead of paying for their care. My wife said "Oh my god, I can't believe they printed that! Really? Lentils?" (For the record, my wife is absolutely devoted to our two cats.) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted March 26, 2022 Report Share Posted March 26, 2022 In Britain they call it a "lift", but Americans call it an "elevator". We're just raised differently. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted March 26, 2022 Report Share Posted March 26, 2022 Where is Pariah’s penguin gif when you need it? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted March 27, 2022 Report Share Posted March 27, 2022 People are always shocked when they find out that I'm a terrible electrician. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted March 27, 2022 Report Share Posted March 27, 2022 People are not shocked to find out that I’m a terrible shock therapist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted March 27, 2022 Report Share Posted March 27, 2022 Scientists are talking about different plans to try to find water on Mars. I've got the perfect solution: send me up there with a set of golf clubs. slikmar, archer and mattingly 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lord Liaden Posted March 27, 2022 Report Share Posted March 27, 2022 2 hours ago, Pariah said: Scientists are talking about different plans to try to find water on Mars. I've got the perfect solution: send me up there with a set of golf clubs. Dude, don't worry about water. You're gonna be stuck in the solar system's biggest sand trap. Pariah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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