Logan D. Hurricanes Posted March 31, 2023 Report Share Posted March 31, 2023 Knock Knock! Who's there? Hike! Hike Who? No one at the door. The grisly truth is out now: You are all alone. Pariah, Ockham's Spoon and wcw43921 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 2, 2023 Report Share Posted April 2, 2023 On 3/31/2023 at 2:47 PM, Logan D. Hurricanes said: Knock Knock! Who's there? Hike! Hike Who? Unsuspecting son Dad waiting, with bated breath. Sets the perfect trap. Alternate answer, slightly better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 2, 2023 Report Share Posted April 2, 2023 My wife said to me, "If you won the lottery, would you still love me?" I said, “Of course I would. I’d miss you, but I’d still love you.” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wcw43921 Posted April 2, 2023 Report Share Posted April 2, 2023 No jury would ever convict her. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 4, 2023 Report Share Posted April 4, 2023 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 4, 2023 Report Share Posted April 4, 2023 Pariah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 5, 2023 Report Share Posted April 5, 2023 I have managed to successfully weigh a rainbow. Turns out it was pretty light. wcw43921 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 5, 2023 Report Share Posted April 5, 2023 Pariah and Ockham's Spoon 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ockham's Spoon Posted April 9, 2023 Report Share Posted April 9, 2023 Inventor of the clock: "There will be 12 numbers on it." Friend: "So the day will be divided into 12 sections?" Inventor: "No, 24." Friend: "Um, okay. So the day starts at 1?" Inventor: "No, it starts at 12, which is at night." Friend: "Uh..." Inventor: "And the 6 means 30." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattingly Posted April 10, 2023 Report Share Posted April 10, 2023 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QVPUIRGthI Ockham's Spoon 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted April 11, 2023 Report Share Posted April 11, 2023 I have an intense fear of needles. I'm a hypodermichondriac Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 To feed their initiates and support themselves financially, monasteries will sometimes get involved in agricultural pursuits. There was a monastery in England that had been built next to a large lake where there were plenty of fish. There was also a large field behind the lake that was perfect for growing potatoes. So the monastery opened a fish and chips shop which was soon famous throughout the land. They became known as the fish friars and the chip monks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 What is a pirate's favorite letter? Spoiler A writ of safe passage signed by His Majesty Charles the Second, King of England. wcw43921 and Logan D. Hurricanes 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 It's difficult to believe bears made porridge and the only thing wrong was the temperature. Q: What do bears use to asses the temperature, anyway? A: A furmometer. Q: What scale does it use? A: Furrenheit. Pariah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mattingly Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 Geologists! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
L. Marcus Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 "Geology is not a real science!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 Of course not, it changes. Real science is impervious to change, ie a priori. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pariah Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 What a load of schist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
death tribble Posted April 15, 2023 Report Share Posted April 15, 2023 To dispel the darkness I would use German electricians with the same first name. After all many Hans many light work.... BoloOfEarth 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 16, 2023 Report Share Posted April 16, 2023 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted April 16, 2023 Report Share Posted April 16, 2023 Why are they called “paintings”. You’re finished. That there's a “Painted”. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bazza Posted April 16, 2023 Report Share Posted April 16, 2023 Question: How many librarians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Answer: 645.5* *Dewey Decimal Classification 645.5: Household furnishings - Lighting fixtures. Pariah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 16, 2023 Report Share Posted April 16, 2023 Since gummy worms are made from gelatin, and that is made from bones, gummy worms have more bones than real worms, which have none. Pariah 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Logan D. Hurricanes Posted April 17, 2023 Report Share Posted April 17, 2023 My psychiatrist diagnosed me as a kleptomaniac. I asked her, "Is there something I can take for that?" Pariah and Ockham's Spoon 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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